Confidence Classic: The Mindset Shifts That Help You Break Out of a Rut with Heather!
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What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
Maybe the reason why you haven't been getting the things you wanted is you deserved so much better. But you had to let go of that mediocre. You had to let go of that average so that you could grab the great. And in order to grab that great, you have to let go. Come on this journey with me. Each week when you join me, we are going to chase down our goals, overcome adversity, and set you up for a better tomorrow.
I'm ready for my close-up.
Tell me, have you been enjoying these new bonus confidence classics episodes we've been dropping on you every week? We've literally hundreds of episodes for you to listen to. So these bonuses are a great way to help you find the ones you may have already missed. I hope you love this one as much as I do. Hi, and welcome back. I'm so glad you're back here with me this week. Okay, so I wanted to share a quick story about a woman that I do some coaching for. She's incredibly successful. She is in corporate America. She's a senior vice president of one of the largest companies in the US and rock star, complete and total rock star. But like most of us, You know, she has her moments where she needs someone to give her a hand and help pick her up, and she wants to run ideas against somebody else who's been in similar situations.
Which is super smart. I completely get it. Well, this week I was very taken aback by a meeting that I had with her. She... sent me a text message and said, hey, is there any chance we can meet this week? We weren't supposed to meet this week. And I said, yeah, of course, you know, we'll find time. We got on the calendar, found the time. And as soon as I got on the call with her, she says, this is so dumb. And she kept saying that. I know this is so dumb, but listen, hey, listen, this is really dumb. This, I don't know what's going on. I'm being so dumb. And before she could get anything else out of her mouth, I just stopped her and said, first of all, whatever it is, it's not dumb. You're not dumb. You're one of the most successful, smartest people I know.
So let's fire that, right? The point that I want to make for you right now is, sometimes we don't even notice how we're speaking to ourselves or how we are labeling ourselves. And doing that puts us beneath others. Doing that is a major holdback. So this week, today, notice how are you speaking about yourself? What are the words that you're using about you to you and to others? And I talk about this a lot. We teach other people how to treat us. If you're running around through the world telling people you're dumb, they're gonna believe it eventually, right? Maybe not right off the bat, but at some point in time, if you sell someone something long enough, they're probably going to buy it. So don't call yourself dumb.
Call yourself things that you would like other people to... Emulate, meaning once I heard what her predicament was, it wasn't that she was being dumb.
What coaching moment inspired this episode and how does it start the conversation?
It was she was regressing to past behavior in her life, right? So we all grow and change and evolve. We're not the same people we were when we're one year old as we are today. That's normal. It's evolution in our lives and growth in our life. And that's totally normal and expected. If you're not having growth in your life, you get a problem. So when you notice, hmm, I'm noticing that I'm behaving in a way that I used to behave when I was younger that didn't serve me, that's amazing. It's incredible self-awareness, being reflective, which is so mature and insightful, right? And it's noticing a regression to a past behavior that you had fired, terminated, And, you know, no longer signed up for. And now you're saying, hey, I'm doing this again.
This is temporary. I want to pause and I want to dig deep into this so that I can get it out of my life again. So to me, though, there was nothing dumb about the situation. It was the opposite. It was incredibly intuitive and smart and reflective. And and I was so proud of her. Right. So I want you to feel that same kind of pride. If you have a moment today or this week where you notice a behavior that comes up that's something that you no longer subscribe to, give yourself the grace for a moment and say, hey, I recognize that isn't my best, but that's in my past.
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Chapters
6 chapters
1
What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
0:00–2:50
2
What coaching moment inspired this episode and how does it start the conversation?
2:50–5:17
3
Why does calling yourself 'dumb' hold you back and how can you reframe self-talk?
5:17–9:38
4
How can noticing regressions to old behaviors be evidence of growth?
9:38–15:58
5
What lesson from therapy teaches a more compassionate response to mistakes?
15:58–18:12
6
How did a personal parenting moment illustrate the power of giving yourself grace?
18:12–30:22
Speakers
1 identifiedMore from Creating Confidence with Heather Monahan
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Confidence Classic: Unlock More of Your Potential with Heather!
Confidence Classic: Step Into New Possibilities After a Layoff with Heather!