Creating Confidence with Heather Monahan
Confidence Classic: The Steps to Reinvent Your Life Starting Now with Heather!
22 Apr 2026
Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.
Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
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You are exactly where you need to be. Anything is possible today. Come on this journey with me. Each week when you join me, we are going
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Hi and welcome back. I'm so glad you're back here with me this week. Okay, I was thinking today as we are in the middle of July and I was thinking about one year ago and how much life can change in one year. It's incredible.
So, if you don't know, if you haven't been with me for a while, a year ago, my son had come out of Zoom school and had not done very well, like most kids, you know, just wasn't very engaged on the computer all year and had to make up some classwork. So he ended up going to an academic institution. camp for four weeks in July last year.
Now it doesn't sound like that big a deal, but let me break it down for you. Again, first world problems, I know, but my son's an athlete and the only camps he'd ever been to are sports camps, right? To play basketball and do the things he loved. But now it was basically get on a plane, fly to Boston, drive to New Hampshire, go into this really rural
camp and do homework and learn all day and you don't get any access to your phone other than 10 minutes a day and you live in a tent. Okay, not that appealing, right? So especially when you're used to living in South Beach, right, in a condo in South Beach and, you know, can basically do whatever you want. Okay, so this was not an exciting time for him.
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Chapter 2: What are effective strategies for staying present while pursuing goals?
There's all these criteria on what you're allowed to bring and what you have to bring. And he couldn't fit it in the suitcase. So he was saying, well, basically this is a wash. It's not going to work. And I said, let's focus on the solutions. He was so focused on the problem. And like anyone, when you're in a rut, you're not looking forward to something. It's easy to go down that path, right?
And just focus on what's wrong. For me, I wasn't boarding the plane to go to Boston and then New Hampshire and live in a tent for a month. So I was able to focus on the solution. And that's why it's so important who we surround ourselves with, who we tap for help when we need it. So I stood next to him. I was looking at the bag. I was looking at the other things he couldn't fit in.
I was thinking, I'm looking, I'm looking for solutions. I'm looking for solutions. And it hits me. There was another zipper on the bag that when you unzipped, it popped up and it gave you like twice as much space. But because he was so flustered and frustrated, he'd forgotten about that in the moment. Completely understandable.
But for me, I had a different perspective and I was so focused on the solution that it just came to me. So we got all of his stuff in and I just reminded him, you know, along the way, you're going to find obstacles. You're going to find challenges. Stay focused on the solutions and they'll always present themselves. They do. They just they inevitably will. So sadly, I said goodbye.
He went to camp. and he got his phone for 10 minutes a day every evening. And so he would call me and it was awful. You know, he's saying, this is horrible. There's bugs everywhere. And I live in a tent and they make us, you know, clean. And it was not what he was accustomed to, putting it mildly. And so I would try to be super positive, like, oh my gosh, let's count the days down.
Let's cross them off together. You know, trying to make him feel more hopeful and focus on the goal, not on the daily grind and daily challenges. So, oh my gosh.
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Chapter 3: What personal story does Heather share about her son?
All right, so then one night I'm out to dinner with my girlfriend right near my house and I get a phone call and it's from the camp. And they tell me, your son is in the emergency room. We think he's broken his arm. It's like at eight o'clock at night on a random night. I'm like, you gotta be kidding me. So I head home immediately. I'm panicked. I'm losing my mind.
Literally crying my eyes out, so worried that he's alone in an emergency room in New Hampshire, you know, and what the heck is going on? I can't get to him. So eventually I get a phone call back from him that night. He was playing basketball, broke his arm, and he's back now at the camp completely.
disaster so upsetting so scary right but he's okay so again you know he actually calmed me down that that night because i was so worried about him okay cut to i get a flight out there i'm like okay i gotta get get out there to see him he can't be out there with a broken arm and i'm thinking in my mind okay i'm gonna get there he's gonna get in the car and we're gonna come home because even though he's only halfway through camp you know how can he succeed in an academic camp
with a broken arm and it's the arm that he uses to write with right so this is it's a wrap it's over stick a fork in it so i board a plane i fly to boston i had to deliver a virtual keynote from my hotel room in boston to la that night i remember i went to bed woke up first thing in the morning drove the three hour ride to new hampshire or whatever it was
pull up to this rural academic camp in Wolfboro, New Hampshire. I can't make this stuff up. There's like no road lights out there. It's so crazy. And my son walks out without a bag. And I said, what are you doing? And he said, mom, let's go to the hotel. have dinner and we'll talk. And so he presented himself so differently. It was so interesting.
It was one of those moments when you're shocked, but you're so proud when you see, you know, that potential within someone materializing. And it just reminded me, you know what, sometimes getting out of your routine is so important to help you grow. So whatever routine you're in right now, maybe pump the brakes for a minute and try something different.
Because here with this crazy situation was for him to go to academic camp for a month. And I hadn't seen him in a couple of weeks. And in just in that couple of weeks of him being on his own, of him breaking his arm and finding a way to figure it out in the emergency room on his own and finding, you know, doing all these things on his own.
He was so much more powerful and so much more confident, even though he had a broken arm, right? It's so crazy. So we go to the hotel and I'm a nervous wreck because I'm like, oh my gosh, I think he's going to stay. And I'm so proud of him, but hopefully he's okay. You know, all these mom worries that I have about my child.
But he really had stepped into being such a young man and having grown so much. And just in the 24 hours I got to spend with him, I just saw like version 2.0 of my kid. You know, he really had gone to the next level and just was so confident and just such a rock. And I was so proud of him. And it was so peaceful.
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Chapter 4: How can focusing on solutions change your perspective?
and try to find your passion.
No matter what situation you're in or you're looking at or what challenge you're about to face, know that it could be the gift that's going to change everything for you. So cut to a year later, we're sitting here, we're under contract, yay, the condo's selling and we're gonna be moving in the next month.
And it's all gonna line up with school starting and not having to drive so much and my child not having to wake up so flipping early in the morning. All these things are starting to come together that a year ago, oh my gosh, I prayed for them to come together, but I had no idea how they would happen. And I just, I want you to know whatever situation you're in right now,
One year can change things so drastically in ways you could never, ever imagine in ways that are so incredible, so exciting and so positive, but it all starts with you and starts with you being willing.
to break the routines that maybe aren't serving you and try something different and step into the unknown and start making small changes until you can build up that momentum and start taking ownership for where you are today instead of blaming others and look within and look at what the solution could be instead of staying so focused on what that obstacle may be.
So I just wanted to share that quick little story with you. And then I was... in church and our pastor was sharing a personal story from his life that really struck me that I wanted to share with you. So he's been preaching about the art of joy for the last month. And, you know, the art of joy is all about that. We, it is our job and duty to find joy in every moment. Right.
And while that can be easy at certain times, like when things are going well, or maybe when you're on vacation or you're doing something that you love, it's really about finding the joy in the moments that aren't that amazing, like Dylan did with his camp, right?
Being in academic camp, he found the art of joy within that camp, which was deciding to eat healthy, teaching himself how to write with the other hand, winning these awards, putting the work in, right? In these difficult moments, finding the joy in any of the moments. And so our pastor was sharing that he had to take a trip out to the West Coast and decided to bring his two small boys with him.
I believe they're two and four. And he was by himself. He did not have his wife with him. And he flew on the red eye out there, which if you've ever done this with a child, I've done it with my son so many times. I mean, I can't even count. I have no idea because I had to travel to Las Vegas all the time for work when Dylan was very little. So I would bring Dylan with me all the time.
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Chapter 5: How did Heather's son demonstrate resilience during his camp experience?
I definitely do. Okay. So chapter 19, turning tragedy into triumph. I thought this tied in well with what we're talking about today. A little over a month after being fired, I heard that a former coworker of mine was fired from the same company. I called him immediately and he sounded so scared and sad. I understood how he felt because only four weeks earlier, I felt the exact same way.
I told him what I did and how I got back on my feet. Over the past year, people have shared with me their own personal stories about getting fired and how they dealt with that adversity. I started compiling those stories and put together a list of techniques that help me and others get through difficult times like these. When people tell me they've been fired, here is the advice that I give them.
Number one, feel sad. First and foremost, it is necessary to give yourself some time to feel hurt, upset and angry. I definitely felt those things. I certainly felt that way. I cried for two days straight. Anytime you suffer disappointment, you will struggle. Don't skip this step. Don't pretend you aren't feeling these things.
Let it out because it's the first step you need to take in order to bounce back stronger. The comeback is always stronger than the setback. Have a 30-day plan. I broke my plan down into weeks. Each week I had specific goals I wanted to accomplish. And each week was a step that helped me get to my ultimate monthly goal. Everyone's goals are different.
So come up with a plan that fits you and what you want to accomplish. Write it down because seeing it in writing makes it visual and makes it real. Crossing the days off on a calendar helps. You will see yourself getting closer to your goal and feeling better. Most importantly, have faith that things can change for the better.
Keep a journal, write down what you're doing each day, write down how you feel, list your fears, describe what actions you want to take each day to improve. When you set a goal to lose weight, you weigh yourself each day to keep on track of your progress. It's no different when you're trying to find how to get through a difficult situation.
It's the equivalent of taking your temperature each day in that it allows you to see how you're getting better, even if you don't initially feel any better. This will become your roadmap to rebuilding your strength. At the end of this process, the insight you glean from your notes will empower you in ways you can't imagine. Remember that you've been here before.
It may sound depressing at first, but identifying another time in life when you have been hurt will help. After I was fired, I went back to look at my divorce journal to see where I was at different times and how I progressed to eventually move beyond that pain. You gain strength by reading how you previously overcame adversity. It reinforces the idea that you can and will do it again.
Express gratitude. Shifting your perspective and expressing gratitude will help you accelerate your progress and get you closer to your goal of feeling better. Every morning when you wake up, write down three things that you are grateful for. It can be something substantial like your children, friends, health, or even something small like a good hair day. That should be celebrated.
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Chapter 6: Why is stepping outside your comfort zone essential for growth?
Don't fall into that trap. You want goals and you want to work towards those goals, but you want to live for today. Realize that you are living in the moment and this moment is yours. You are exactly where you need to be. Anything is possible today. Create your own future. Use words that encapsulate how you picture yourself in the future. Create visuals in your mind to make it feel more real.
Write down your goals and desires so you can be reminded of them. Spend some quiet time seeing yourself where you ultimately want to be and feeling how you want to feel. Watch the universe rise to help you get there. Take a step back.
Chapter 7: How can breaking routines unlock new opportunities?
Think about your former goals. Do you have the same goals today that you did years earlier? People change, and as they do, so does what they want. It's easy to put on blinders and race toward a goal without realizing that deep down inside, you might have shifted lanes. You might not want the same things, but continue to pursue those same goals because that's what you've always done.
What are you meant to be doing? what will it take for you to get there take this time to reassess and modify your goals so they better fit the direction you want to take your life now you are priority number one you are the one going through this and you are the one who's going to improve your life as a result of it no one else can do it for you and nobody has to give you anything
You don't need anyone's permission. You have to work for it, and you have to be your own biggest supporter. That all begins with putting yourself first. Before every flight, the attendants go through their spiel and explain how during an emergency, you must put the oxygen mask on you before helping others.
This doesn't mean that you should turn your back on others, but you have to survive first before you can help anyone else. Start your survival strategy today. Be open to signs. Notice what is happening around you. Sometimes the answers to the most complex problems have simple solutions that were right in front of you all along.
Chapter 8: What role does gratitude play in transforming challenges?
And when all else fails, remember this is temporary. This too shall pass. When you are down, the key is to remember that things will go back up again and nothing is ever as bad as it initially seems. Like most of you, I've had my share of breakdowns, but looking back on all of it now, I've come to realize that my biggest breakdowns led me to my biggest breakthroughs. Okay, that was chapter 19.
If you haven't checked out Confidence Creator yet, I don't know what you're waiting for. I love this book. I'm super proud of it. And yes, there are three mistakes in it, and I'm super proud of those three mistakes too. Because done will always be better than perfect. Okay, if you like this episode, please share it. Tag me. I will repost it.
And that's how I know that you like the content I'm creating. When you share, leave a review, and tag me, I get you, I hear you, and I'll keep creating more content like this for you. If you have any questions for me that you want me to answer on the show, send me a DM. Go to my website, heathermonaghan.com. Leave me a note there.
I'm happy to answer any of your questions and I so appreciate your support. Keep creating your confidence. You know I will be. I'll see you next week.