Confidence Classic: Where True Confidence Really Comes From with Nicole Kalil
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What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
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When I get this promotion, I'll feel confident. When I make this level of income, then I'll feel confident. When my children are perfectly behaved, then I'll feel confident. When the scale says a certain number, then I'll feel confident. And the reality is that's just not how confidence works. And so the con is that it's something outside of us. This idea that so much of us have bought into is that confidence is related to how we look and how we feel. The root of the word confidence is trust. So confidence is when we trust ourselves. Come on this journey with me.
What is the biggest misconception about confidence?
Each week when you join me, we are going to chase down our goals, overcome adversity, and set you up for a better tomorrow. I'm ready for my close-up. Tell me, have you been enjoying these new bonus confidence classics episodes we've been dropping on you every week? We've literally hundreds of episodes for you to listen to. So these bonuses are a great way to help you find the ones you may have already missed. I hope you love this one as much as I do. Hi, and welcome back. I'm so excited for you to meet my guest today. Nicole Khalil is an in-demand speaker and a dynamic host of This Is Women's Work podcast. Known as the Confidence Sherpa, Nicole reveals strategies that set her apart from other self-help experts.
Previously a Fortune 100 C-suite executive, she's helped thousands of women reclaim their confidence so they can live authentically, both personally and professionally. Nicole lives with her husband and daughter in Andover, Mass. my old stomping ground. Nicole, thanks for being here today.
Heather, thank you so much for having me. This is like a surreal moment because I followed you for years. And then of course, we have a shared passion around confidence. So I read your book many years ago. And so when we were connected earlier this year, I felt like I was, you know, meeting a celebrity and Total had a fangirl moment. So I could not be any more honored to be here today. Isn't it funny? That is so funny.
But you know, it's funny. I have a fangirl moment over my pastor lately. Like I'm obsessed with him.
How does inauthenticity affect self-belief?
And when I, I haven't met him yet, but I keep telling my friends that know him. I'm like, introduce me. I need to hug this man. Like, I'm so excited. I freak out. So I totally, I get it. I'm with you. And thank you for that compliment. However, you know what's interesting? And guys, I want to give you a little backstory is Nicole and I were connected through our mutual amazing friend, Jordan Montgomery. And if you guys haven't heard that episode, go back and check it out. Jordan is the ultimate connector. And his whole episode is about how to network, how to connect with other business people and really take advantage of those opportunities. And so Jordan's introduced me to so many people. Jordan introduced Nicole and I, and Nicole had me on her podcast, which was great.
Definitely go back and check out that episode as well. We'll link that in the show notes, but, What was funny is that we connected on the computer, of course, you know, post-pandemic internet Zoom, and did our interview there like we're doing today. But an opportunity arose for you to come to Miami to meet me and Gina, which...
What role do commitments play in building confidence?
It's so funny to me because my experience in corporate America was women backstabbing women, women not supporting women, and definitely different than what it is like with you and with a lot of the people that I know today. And you were so quick to say, oh, guys, I'll jump on a flight, come right down to Miami. I'll stay in town. We'll get together. We'll meet. We'll work out together. We'll hang out together and see how we can support each other. And I just thought that was such a confident, ballsy response. So it just massive credit to your confidence Sherpa title.
Well, it could be confidence. It could be a touch of just, you know, tenacity to get what I want.
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
0:00–0:48
2
What is the biggest misconception about confidence?
0:48–2:19
3
How does inauthenticity affect self-belief?
2:19–3:24
4
What role do commitments play in building confidence?
3:24–5:04
5
How can mistakes and failures enhance self-confidence?
5:04–7:32
6
What are the five biggest confidence derailers for women?
7:32–9:55
7
How does perfectionism undermine our confidence?
9:55–12:14
8
Why is comparison considered poison for confidence?
12:14–38:24
Speakers
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