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Chapter 1: Who are the hosts and what is the episode's premise?
Hello and welcome back to Distractible. My name is Markiplier. I am your host this week because I won last week. But one of these two gentlemen that I'm with is going to be the winner this episode and they will be the host next week. So if you don't like this episode, I'm hurt, but only a little bit.
And then next week or later in this week, you'll have another episode that'll be better than this one. And you won't have to hurt my feelings anymore.
Way better.
Seems likely, yeah. One of them is going to have a terrible episode next week. One of them is going to have a great episode. So it's up to them and me to pick who it's going to be. I almost accidentally said the word already. And I don't know what that would have meant. Oh, there's no pen attached to this. Oh, no. Time to write with some ketchup. Mr. I'm ready over here isn't actually ready.
No, I'm ready. Hold on. Wake up. Wake up. Wake up. I'm going to deduct a point for myself for not being ready. Good boy. Yeah, I'm deducting a point for that. I'm sorry. Good boy. There's another one gone. Okay. Bad boy. Oh, you got one back for that. Oh, you bad boy. All right, points for boy is out. Bad girl. Good man. All right, all right. This is a terrible start.
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Chapter 2: What are the hosts' opinions on Cincinnati's LaRosa's Pizza?
I told you, everybody, this is going to be your least favorite episode. I want to hear about these two gentlemen's life. I can start this time because I... Bob, you hosted an episode not too long ago where we talked about Cincinnati. And you and Mark were agreed on the front of LaRose's Pizza Bad. That made me want LaRose's Pizza again. And I ordered some. I got a large bacon pepperoni.
And it was so good. Like one of the best pizzas of all time. I enjoyed every bite. I wanted more. I couldn't get enough of it. And all I can think to myself is how wrong your two's opinion of this was. This must be how you guys feel about me with tacos. Every bite, every smell, every swallow, every bit of that pizza was just so good in my mouth hole and throat cavity. I enjoyed it so much.
And I want more right now. I've been craving it again ever since. La Rose's is great. Underappreciated. Under the radar. If you're in Cincinnati, try La Rose's. Don't listen to these two.
It's not underappreciated. It's a huge fucking chain restaurant. There's like a thousand of them.
But everyone seems to... I was talking to our friend Jesse, and Jesse was also like, yeah, I'm not big on it. It's like, how do all of my friends not like the best pizza in Cincinnati? Or at least one of the top three. Those are very different claims. Just sort of throw that out there. I don't know which one's my favorite. I'm not as picky on pizza. I like a lot of pizza.
So to say which one's my favorite kind of depends on which one I'm craving because I crave different ones at different times. But right now, La Rosa's number one crave. I deduct to the point.
I feel sad for you.
I knew you two would appreciate it, but the audience deserved to know the truth.
Audience, if you come to Cincinnati, definitely get LaRosa's so that you can understand how wrong Wade is. The thing is, it's fine.
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Chapter 3: What was the experience during the recent severe weather and tornado warnings?
that's not that's not that's unsettling we had a weird moment we were not like in a tornado watch we had a weird moment where we were just all of a sudden a tornado warning which means that there is one and it was just like tornado warning and like we're like the sirens aren't going off it's not even that windy yet like weirdly calm right now well it was
I feel like it was just really windy a minute ago. Nothing, I'll go outside. Well, we were like, did we get all the animals into the base? Because normally, you know, the loud sirens go off when it's your turn to go down. But we were like being told, we're like, the wind is crazy, the rain is crazy, tornado. And we like, that says it's us.
But right now, that's not, it was like 10 minutes later, it started to get crazy. But like, it was just really weird that it was like, are we in it? Did the tornado pick us up? Is this like our we're in Kansas moment?
This storm on Sunday was one of those very like, it was a hard wall of storm because we had the same thing. It was like, I forget. It was like maybe like seven o'clock and my phone was like, ooh, thunder or tornado watch and blah. And I looked outside and it was like kind of sunny, like sunset, but like dusk. But I was like, really? In 20 minutes, there might be a tornado here.
It was a little later than they thought, but it was like half an hour later. It was just absolute chaos. Also, can I just throw out, I can't be the only one. You guys get that instinct. We were in the basement, and the sirens went off, and we got the warning, and we were like, okay, let's go in the basement. Tornado warning. And we were watching, James was watching something.
It was after bedtime, so he was real sleepy. So we were just trying to keep him happy. And I had my phone, and I was watching the weather. And part of me was like, we should just go upstairs and take a peek.
it's it's probably it sounds fine it doesn't sound like there's a tornado maybe i should just go upstairs and just take a peek like i that instinct is so hard to fight every part of me was like you're not gonna die if you just go just go take a peek i've never seen a tornado i want to see one i've seen funnel clouds yeah i want to step outside and see if i can see one yeah well if i go if it looks like a tornado when i go you go back downstairs yeah you'll be like whoa
And then you leave. What are the odds you're going to open the door and it's going to rip the door off its hinges and you're going to be sucked out? Listen, it's not like an airplane, okay? This might be less problematic. Well, it's probably not less problematic here. I don't know, trees, tree branches, that kind of stuff can do it. There was a news segment yesterday.
We were at the car dealership for six hours, so we got to see this on repeat. Because they repeated the same four stories just on repeat for six hours. It was awful. You mean the news? Yeah. Yeah. I thought it was Molly just likes watching Weather Channel reruns. She records it, just plays it over again, makes sure she doesn't miss any details. I love this one.
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Chapter 4: What challenges did Markiplier face with his large Prusa shipment?
And they just haven't picked it up yet. And my thought is, why haven't they picked it up yet? Because it's costing them $500. They're not being charged $600 a day. It's you, isn't it? Well, how many other packages have they not picked up? Because they do a lot of the shipping. And so I'm just wondering, like, is this just normal for these businesses to run this way? This can't be right.
i don't know who i don't know where it is it just says it's at lax which is very far yeah just go to lax find your pallets back into some loading bay somewhere you just drive across the tarmac you get to the loading bay everything's fine look i have a truck now i can take one pallet And that's it.
That would be the worst back and forth day trip of all time.
Can you stack three high like it's Farm Simulator and just throw some ratchet straps over? Storage Hunter Simulator. Just throw that shit in there.
So I'm still waiting for that because apparently it's supposed to be delivered, but I'm just fascinated that they're just eating that cost because that is now added up to more than what the entire shipping cost probably was.
They must have like a, maybe it wasn't communicated to you, but FedEx has like an area where it's like, put our shit over here and they get it. It's a lower rate or something. Or there's like, there's no way they're just eating that cost and FedEx is just going to pay that because they're.
But no one's delivering it yet. And I've confirmed this multiple times, but I still got any, I'm still getting the emails. Emails are still coming to me that like this has not been picked up yet. You are now accruing a price. That seems bad. I really hope that no one crossed the wire here and I'm supposed to pick that up because it's getting really expensive really fast.
Yeah, that's a lot of money very quickly. You're already five days in. Yes, that's why I wanted to take care of it on Friday. I was like, oh god, we gotta rent a U-Haul truck or something. We gotta go. Where am I gonna get a forklift?
Yeah, well, I hope the place that has the thing has a forklift, but goddamn.
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Chapter 5: What is the bizarre story about gallons of urine found in a recycling bin?
But from far enough away, it just looks like a little snail trail. Is that a better description?
What we're actually, actually looking at is some of the most brilliant McDonald's marketing of all time.
If you see the M's and the yellow lines, they want you to drive down the road and know you're headed toward McDonald's breakfast.
What the fuck is this and why is this? It's like the road was too quick to get down. It's like, well, we need to make the road longer. What if we just make them curve around a little bit, make it take longer to get down the road? You got there eventually. Yes, this is a speed measure to try to get people to slow down in their driving. Now, here's the thing. This is in, where is this in?
This is Pennsylvania. And it's meant to zigzag because you can't, obviously, well, you totally can go fast doing this. And here's the thing. Texas roads are insane. Filming some projects in Austin, like that's not even the worst of it.
But one of the things in Austin is that there's a lot of bike lanes that become protected bike lanes, suddenly not protected bike lanes, turning into different lanes. So the road kind of does this anyway while you're doing that. Maybe by design, maybe not. Every time I've driven on those, I say to myself... I can't believe they're making me do these maneuvers at speed.
There's nothing in my head that went slow down. It's just, man, I hope this car can handle these turns. And so I'm sure that's what a lot of drivers are doing. It's just that or they just drive straight through the middle of it.
Well, I can't tell if it's better or worse. Around my parents' house, there are roads where they've essentially done the same thing. But what they did instead was they put in pinch points where the road just gets really narrow and there's hard curbs on both sides.
Or there's like a traffic circle, like a tiny little traffic circle where you could literally drive straight over it and you might mistake it for a speed bump. But it's for the same purpose of like, so you have to drive more slowly.
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Chapter 6: How do the hosts describe unusual road markings and traffic calming measures?
whoa man yeah that might be that might be that might be your dumbest good the vampire oh man next article there's nothing about this article really but i want you to hear the title florida senate race randolph bracy slams sister for running against him in orange county like purpley like they fucked or like that's it okay
Randolph Bracey, huh?
Slam's sister. For running against him.
What's her name? Lacey Bracey?
I don't know. I didn't read the article. I'm just looking at the title. What was his name? Rudolph?
Randolph.
Randolph? Randolph? There's nothing else about it. It's the slams. Are you focusing on the names or anything else in the title?
I've actually got a local citizen here. Sir, what was your name? Uh... I go by Saint Nicholas. Ha ha ha. Yeah. Old Rudolph Bracey. I was actually going to have him lead my sleigh tonight. But he told me just before we were about to take off. He's running for Senate, apparently. And he's on the naughty list. So that's not likely. Not likely. His sister, though. I'd slam her. All right.
Anyway, Santa Claus, everybody. Thanks so much for the interview, sir. Yeah, Santa Claus lives in Florida. He retired to Florida. That's where he spends the off season. Did I do it right? Yeah, you sure did. Anyway, you just latched onto that because of the slams?
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