Ep. 57: The Habits Keeping You Small with Luke Mathers
episode
English Talk — Speaking up in English at work for introverts with Louise Jefferies
58 min
1 speaker
5 chapters
transcribed 1 month ago
Transcript
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Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.
What is the purpose of this episode and who is the guest?
Hello and welcome to English Talk, the podcast for people who feel insecure speaking English as a non-native at work. Join me and my guests as we chat about the challenges of speaking up in English when you're not only a native speaker but also a bit of an introvert.
This week I'm joined by Luke Mathers. Luke is a speaker, author and coach who transforms how people look at stress. Using neuroscience, ancient wisdom and the experience of 20 plus years running successful businesses, he coaches leaders, Olympians and elite sportspeople on how to harness the power of stress. Luke, thank you so much for joining me today. It's a pleasure to have you here.
My pleasure too, Louise. I've been um thinking about doing this for a while, so it's a good one.
Exactly. We've I think been in contact for a couple of years. And that started because you wrote a brilliant book called Uh Curious Habits. And before that I believe it was Stress Teflon. And we identify with some of our themes in that book. Would you like to give a short introduction for our listeners on the Curious Habits?
On curious habits, yeah, I think I think we've all got a few curious habits. Those things that we do that perhaps don't quite serve us, but we do them anyway. And they're not necessarily bad, but they're they're not so much bad as they are sort of unexamined. And there are things that we do that that cause some problems, but they're probably not big problems. But we're we're doing them anyway. And I think if we can get curious about what we're doing, what are our triggers to do them and what we're getting out of it, I think we can then sort of work out whether that's something we want to continue to do or not. And so I think I I had a few of them. Things like, um, I would never take breaks and then I'd get really frazzled.
And then I'd I'd eat chocolate chip cookies and drink Pepsi Max and wonder why my pants didn't fit quite so well anymore. Things like that. So um I kind of got curious, or what do I wanted? What was I trying to get out of the chocolate chip cookies and the Pepsi Mac? And what I was wanting to get was calm. I wanted to be centered, I wanted to be calm. And so I got curious, what else could I do instead of instead of sugar and caffeine? 'Cause let's face it, how could sugar and caffeine um not be good? Um but I I think particularly when you are a bit frazzled and you've you've had a busy time, I think the last thing you need is sugar and caffeine. So what else could you do?
Is that And I think
that that's where curious habits began.
Yeah, exactly. And it's interesting because I think you and I are on opposite sides in in certain respects. You know, you've said yourself you're an extrovert by nature. And I'm more introverted, but of course it depends like with anyone on the situation. So it I find it interesting listening to you 'cause you're talking about sugar and caffeine for the high and to keep going. And what you wanted is calm.
Yeah, it's
realise my superpower is calm. Okay, nice. I realize um many years later that Different situations in my past. Explosive situations from other people. Calm was my superpower.
And I
learned that being calm. Kept me safe. So I'm naturally quite a calm person.
Okay. Isn't
that Was there a
time when when a lack of calm made you feel unsafe?
Yes. Or that an explosive situation with in past relationships. And I think to a certain extent the family environment, being calm, if you had a temper and if you suddenly exploded, that wasn't good. That wasn't right.
You're having to deal with the initial problem that made you lose your temper in the first place. And then you're having to deal with whatever consequences happened from losing your temper. So to be able to sort of I love the way you recognize that that calm is a superpower of mind. That's that for you. I I think that's beautiful because it's one of those one of those things that we all need to work out is what are our superpowers.
Yeah.
And There's a lot of peop I I coach a lot of people like yourself. I co I coach a lot of people and one of the things I notice is that they don't necessarily know what their superpowers are.
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Chapters
5 chapters
1
What is the purpose of this episode and who is the guest?
0:06–5:06
2
How does Luke define ‘curious habits’ and why do they matter?
5:06–13:52
3
Why does Louise consider calm a super‑power and when can it become a limitation?
13:52–18:50
4
How do labels like ‘introvert’, ‘extrovert’ or ‘anxious’ shape our identity and behavior?
18:50–46:23
5
What is the difference between confidence and arrogance according to Aristotle’s golden mean?
46:23–57:52