Football Ramble

Penthony Gordon

02 Oct 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Marcus, Luke and Jim are back to gorge on more Champions League delights! And the entire history of Eric Dier's penalty record is the perfect place to...

The Altruistic One

01 Oct 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Liverpool have lost two games in a row. Today, Vish isn't calling it a crisis but he does tell Marcus and Jim that he knows of a Premier League manage...

Mailbag: Should Manchester United sack Ruben Amorim?

30 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Things are going from really, really bad at Manchester United to somehow dramatically worse. So, is it time for old Jim Ratcliffe to bin off the secon...

Is that the Saturday sacking music?

29 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Plucky Crystal Palace are the only side still unbeaten in the Premier League. Today, Marcus, Luke, Jim and Pete give them their long overdue flowers.A...

Jack’s Encyclopaedia: Ballon d'Or winners, Spaniards, and Europa League managers

26 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

It's a game of Jack's Encyclopaedia for the history books: if Luke wins out against Marcus today, then he'll become the first ever unified belt holder...

The Preview Show: Tutankhamun’s soul patch

26 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

The first week of the Europa League is done and dusted. Highlights included Aston Villa finally getting a win and the Nice eagle getting blasted in th...

Inside Luke's Pantry

25 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

There's nothing quite like a can of Carabao to help us digest a night of football which saw four Premier League behemoths gobble up their lower-league...

Carabao Cup: The Musical

24 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Despite scoring, last night should probably be considered a bad night for Hugo Ekitike. Do you think the fact that Pete has written a new chant for hi...

What is the Football Ramble?

24 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Looking for a new football podcast for the 2025/26 season? Well, you’re in luck!The Football Ramble: the original and best football podcast. Strong ...

Mailbag: What’s going wrong at Aston Villa?

23 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Unai Emery's got himself in a right old pickle at Villa Park. Five games into the season and they've not got a single win on the board!Marcus, Jim &am...

I'll monetise some grot for ya

22 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Marcus, Vish and Jim are back to discuss a thigh-rubbing weekend of Premier League football which included an Old Trafford edition of Takeshi's Castle...

My Biddy Aunt: Champions League Icons

19 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

The My Biddy Aunt lineal belt is back on the line, as Vish takes on Luke in an episode all about some of the greats from Champions League past and pre...

The Preview Show: We've got our headlocks back

19 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

How many times can England be crowbarred into one Premier League preview? Get your calculators out everyone, because Marcus is going for the world rec...

Nicolas Jackson’s Bayern Munich

18 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Virgil van Dijk scored a late winner at Anfield last night. As Luke and Jim are very quick to point out today, that's one in the eye for Pete Donaldso...

The no rat guarantee

17 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Most of us get goal alerts when the football is on, but not Pete Donaldson. Today, he reveals to Marcus and Vish the very surprising notifications he ...

Mailbag: Will Spurs survive the Champions League?

16 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

After a tale of two competitions, lots of injuries and a very prickly Australian last season, Spurs are charging into the Champions League with a very...

Haaland the King of Mythical Beasts

15 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Would Man United be better with Donny as CEO? It's got to the stage where Marcus, Luke, Jim and Pete actually seriously consider that on today’s Ram...

My Biddy Aunt: Wonderkids

12 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

The MBA is back! Today's game covers the great young talents in years gone by, some of which have – well – not quite lived up to their billing and...

The Preview Show: The Grin Reaper

12 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Blooming heck the Premier League is back! Today, Marcus and Luke kick off our weekend preview by encouraging Pete to apply for the job of Manchester U...

Ramble Uncut: An Ode to Carlos Queiroz

11 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Ever wondered which Manchester United assistant manager suckled on the teat of Sir Alex Ferguson the most? No? Well, strap yourselves in...Today, we'r...

Our giddy uncle

10 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

The Thomas Tuchel era has finally begun. While Marcus and Luke would like to remain calm, Jim is already crowning England as World Cup winners 2026. E...

Mailbag: Who is Harry Kane's successor?

09 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

The Andorra game wasn't exactly Harry Kane's finest game in England colours – and by the time the World Cup is over next summer, he'll be touching 3...

Can we sanction this buffoonery?

08 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

You could call England's 2-0 win at home to Andorra "professional", but whether you think that's a compliment depends on whether you talk to Marcus or...

Jack's Encyclopaedia: Levy's signings, Brazilians, and Premier League oldies

05 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Jack's Encyclopaedia is back everybody! Reigning champion Vish returns to the ring to take on Marcus and Jim in the game Jack Grealish ...

The Preview Show: It’s our Friday too

05 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Today’s not just any Friday, it’s the Friday before an England game! So how dare Daniel Levy make it all about him!Once we get the small matter of...

Mailbag: Are England going backwards under Thomas Tuchel?

04 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Tommy Tuchs and his merry men are back in action against the mighty Andorra on Saturday. Isn't it bloomin' marvellous to have international football b...

Nationalise it

03 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Ruben Loftus-Cheek is back in the England squad and today is Sir Gareth Southgate’s birthday! Has anyone seen Marcus’ aunt?Unfortunately, Luke and...

Deal Sh*t

02 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

It was Transfer Deadline Day yesterday and those pesky rats have finally scuttled away from their sinking ships. Alexander Isak got his move, as did Y...

Give it more biff

01 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Dominik Szoboszlai certainly gave his free-kick plenty of biff yesterday. But can the same be said about Mikel Arteta’s tactics? Today, Marcus, Luke...

My Biddy Aunt: Deadline Day Icons

29 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

There are just a few days until the summer transfer window slams shut. So what better way to build up to the big day than with a quiz devoted to all t...

The Preview Show: The memes hurt

29 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

“The penalties were long, but the memes were longer” - Vithushan EhantharajahTwo days later and poor Vish is still hurting from Man United’s Lea...

Mailbag: Has player power gone too far?

28 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Alexander Isak and Yoane Wissa have their heels well and truly dug into the ground, refusing to play for their clubs until they get a move away. But i...

The Sean Dyche merry-go-round

27 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Sam Allardyce, Alan Pardew, David Moyes... is there anyone left for West Ham to call?*Sean Dyche’s music starts playing*Things have gone from bad to...

Ramble Reacts: Liverpool steal the points

25 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Join Marcus and Jim as they frolic amongst the ashes of a barn burner at St James’ Park. A literal child scored a 100th minute winner for Liverpool!...

Frank has sense

25 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

It might be the second weekend of the Premier League season, but already Marcus has a revolutionary idea that surely every single fan can get behind.H...

My Biddy Aunt: Tottenham’s Nearly Men

22 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Poor old Daniel Levy. Faffing around with the details of Eberechi Eze's contract then in comes Mikel Arteta and Lovely Berta to nab him for ...

The Preview Show: Mr One Week

22 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Eberechi Eze got his big move to North London, just as we always said he would... Today, Vish and Pete listen to Marcus gloat over what this means for...

The Pillage of Croydon

21 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Crystal Palace are in a right old pickle. Kicked out of the Europa League, set to lose Eberechi Eze and Marc Guéhi, and - no we're not making it up -...

The Moyes Testament

20 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Alexander Isak is having a hot mess summer and he appears to now have Yoane Wissa for company. Today, Marcus, Luke and Vish agree that this is a trans...

Mailbag: Are we all sleeping on Manchester City?

19 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

It turns out we've got our very own Marcus Speller to thank for Manchester City's revival. After a summer spent taping up Phil Foden's bins, the Citiz...

We’ve got our worm back

18 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Ladies and Gentlemen... Sunderland are back, mythical worm and all! Today, Pete demands that Marcus and Vish show the Sunderland worm more respect now...

My Biddy Aunt: Premier League Newcomers

15 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

My Biddy Aunt is back for the new season… and she’s had a glow-up.You lot voted, the old 'Luke’s Game' got the boot, and now we've got a brand n...

The Preview Show: Phil Jonesing for football

15 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

The Premier League is back and we kick things off at the home of the Champions! Today, Marcus, Jim and Pete look ahead to that. Plus, Pete suggests a ...

Our 2025/26 Premier League Predictions!

14 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

It's that time of the year once again, ladies and gents. Time to embarrass ourselves once more as we reveal who we think is going to win the Premier L...

Sing us a song, Jack

13 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

My giddy aunt, Jack Grealish is off to Everton! Marcus, Jim and Vish are here to celebrate the union of David Moyes and Super Jack. Have Everton got t...

Mailbag: Who will surprise us the most this season?

12 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

The season's nearly here everybody! The Community Chest has been cracked open and we're ready for the return of Mama Premier League. So, who might put...

Fabrizio Ratmano

10 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Liverpool took Crystal Palace to penalties. Vithushan Ehantharajah, aka the Football Ramble’s official Rat Correspondent, thinks that Liverpool will...

The Preview Show: Best of British

08 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Crystal Palace are off to Wembley again! Is the promise of a first Community Shield victory for Palace enough to bring a bit of needle to Sunday’s c...

Introducing: Second Tier - The Championship Football Podcast

07 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

With the Premier League still a week away, it's time for the Championship to take centre stage!Second Tier is the UK’s number one podcast for all th...

The Chelsea summer catalogue

06 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

All football clubs and fans rejoice, the Chelsea summer catalogue is open for business. With a host of Chelsea players now available to buy or loan, J...

Mailbag: Which club has the most at stake this season?

05 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Just ten more sleeps until the Premier League returns! But which top flight club has the most on the line this season?Pete, Luke & Jim tuck into t...

Champagne Sonpernova

04 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Only one place for Pete, Jim and Luke to start. Who had the better weekend: Luke and Jim screaming their heads off at Oasis, or Pete getting heartburn...

Pure dung beetle

01 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

It's official: Alexander Isak has been labelled "a rat". But surely there needs to be a new animal for the Newcastle United fanbase? Pete, Luke and Ji...

Ramble Uncut: Josh Brownhill's poem

31 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

**NEW Football Ramble Patreon offer! If you get an annual subscription before the end of August, you'll get 15% off - so that’s just over $50 for ad...

Occam’s angle grinder

30 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Man United have copied Newcastle’s homework and narrowed their striker options down to Ollie Watkins and Benjamin Šeško. That means Pete, Luke and...

Mailbag: Where are the statues going?

29 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Pete, Luke and Jim are back to officially plinth Sarina Wiegman on today's Mailbag! Plus, do we think Thomas Frank will tame the Spurs madhouse? Shoul...

Once again: Easy

28 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

It’s a historic eeeeeaasaaay for Pete, Luke and Jim today after England retain their Euros crown with a clutch win over Spain. We revel in some era-...

Grealish vs Mouse

25 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Luke, Jim and David are here for a Friday frot! And while there might be no football, there are plenty of worried Geordies because Alexander Isak is b...

On The Continent: The big red Jürgen Klopp button

24 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Today, we're bringing you a special episode from Andy's European rabble over at On The Continent!He's joined by Dotun and Italian football expert Nick...

SHARONNNN!!!

23 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Eeeeaaasayyy! Those Lionesses didn't half leave it late, eh? But England are into the final of Euro 2025!Pete, Luke & Jim give their thoughts on a...

Mailbag: What's one rule we'd change for next season?

22 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Pete Donaldson is in the hot seat for a Mailbag... what could possibly go wrong? Today he's joined by Luke and Jim for a special rendition of 'I like ...

Famous Sons of Dudley

21 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

This is a really interesting market opportunity. Does he score lots of goals? Not really. Will he quite frequently get sent off? Maybe. But yeah, £10...

Luke's Game: Ramble Icons

18 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

We’re back with the final round of Luke’s Game for the summer! In this ‘Ramble Icons’ season finale, Marcus takes on Luke for the belts. And t...

Best of the Football Ramble 2024/25 (Part 2)

17 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Welcome back to our Ramble rewind! Today, we're revisiting some of our favourite stories from the second half of this season, featuring everyone's fav...

Best of the Football Ramble 2024/25 (Part 1)

16 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

For the next two days, we're looking back at some of our favourite moments from the 2024/25 season - aka the longest football season of all time (prob...

Reacting to our Club World Cup predictions

15 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Well there we have it, ladies and gents. The key is in the trophy and the curtain has finally come down on the Club World Cup.So now it’s time for M...

Gianni gets the keys out

14 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Chelsea put in a mesmerising performance against PSG to claim the title of world champions - but that’s not half the story, is it?Join Marcus, Luke,...

Luke's Game: Judas Footballers

11 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

It's a titanic clash this week: Marcus vs Brassell! And remember, for Andy Luke's Game is what the Turkish Süper Lig was for Mauro Icardi. Andy and h...

Horny little summer boy

11 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

First Mohammed Kudus signs… Now Morgan Gibbs-White?! Imagine what our Big Ange could have done with this spicy new Spurs line-up! RIP Ange u will li...

Ramble Reacts: New money gubs old money

09 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

In what was billed as Goliath vs Goliath, PSG absolutely crushed Florentino Pérez's poor band of not-so-merry men.Marcus and David wax lyrical about ...

Ratcliffeball

09 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Chelsea are into the final of the Club World Cup! But João Pedro really is extremely sorry about it all.Marcus, Luke and Andy react to Chelsea's marc...

Mailbag: How can we fix football club ownership?

08 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

With the continuing issues at Sheffield Wednesday brought on by owner Dejphon Chansiri, we kick off with a worrying chat about football club ownership...

Incredibly dynamic

07 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

FIFA have always been very benevolent. So of course seats for Chelsea vs Fluminense are going for $13.40. It's what Gianni always wanted.Marcus and Lu...

Upfront: England undone by France and Miedema gives Wales a tough lesson

06 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Today, we're bringing you a special episode from Upfront, Stak's women's football show!Chloe Morgan and Rachel O'Sullivan discuss everything that went...

Luke's Game: Premier League Cult Heroes

04 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

It's been smooth sailing so far in our Luke's Game summer series. But now is where it really gets tough.Luke hosts Marcus and Jim for our most challen...

In memory of Diogo Jota

04 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Yesterday the world received the devastating news that Liverpool and Portugal forward Diogo Jota, along with his younger brother André Silva, had tra...

Introducing: P1 with Matt and Tommy

03 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

If you’re sick of Wimbledon like Luke is, or sick of the Club World Cup like everyone else, don’t fear. It’s the British Grand Prix this weekend...

We’re going to Türkiye

02 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Alarming news coming out of Ramble HQ: Marcus has been in Gianni’s pocket the whole time. Turns out the biggest cheerleader for this foul jamboree h...

Mailbag: What's the best way to watch football?

01 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

We're back with another Tuesday treat, answering all of your questions about the current cesspit which is world football. But since we still love it, ...

Maybe you could go for a swim?

30 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Marcus, Luke and Jim break out a good old fashioned Eaaaaazay after England U21s beat Germany and retained their Euros crown. We wonder which of the s...

Luke's Game: World Cup Icons

27 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

We're back for matchday two of Luke's Game! Defending champion Luke takes on Jack's Encyclopaedia champion Vish with the belt on the line.Today's play...

Sir Gareth Southgate, sir

27 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

That's a wrap on the group stages for the Club World Cup! Sadly, we're saying goodbye to the mighty Mamelodi Sundowns and River Plate, who oh so nearl...

On The Continent: Au revoir Olympique Lyonnais

26 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Today, we're bringing you a special episode from Andy's European rabble over at On The Continent!He's joined by Dotun and French football expert Jonat...

Ursa Major Massive

25 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

The really terrible tournament that we're enjoying and hate but also love goes on. And Gordon Bennett, Auckland City got a point against Boca bloody J...

Mailbag: Could the Club World Cup work one day?

24 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

A tournament straight from the mind of Gianni Infantino is (predictably) a bit of a mess – but is the Club World Cup a totally lost cause, or is the...

European Mulch

23 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

The Brazilian sides cannot be stopped at this Club World Cup thing. Flamengo dispatched Chelsea (while Nicolas Jackson dispatched himself) and who kno...

Luke's Game Returns! English Football Hall of Fame Edition

20 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

That's right! Luke's Game has been restored to its former glory for the summer of 2025.The rules are simple: can you name more clubs a footballer has ...

Al-Hilarious

20 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

These long summer days. They’re just made for throwing a ball in the backyard with, say, I don’t know... Brad Friedel, aren’t they?Marcus, Luke ...

Ramble Uncut: Fabio Capello's Y-Fronts

19 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Today's episode is a special teaser of what you can expect every week on the Football Ramble Patreon!For just $5 a month, you'll get an extended versi...

We will Ramble you

18 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

The Club World Cup might not be quite tickling our fancy at the moment, but it has meant a new Pitbull song. It’s a remix. And it might have been ma...

Mailbag: Who can - and should - actually host a World Cup?

17 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

With increasing scrutiny placed on the likes of Saudi Arabia, Qatar and even the United States, we wonder which countries could viably host a World Cu...

I just love the culture

16 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Never mind freed from desire, can we be freed from... this?The Club World Cup is underway and Marcus, Jim and Vish are here to give it the serious, sa...

Mailbag: Which players will define this decade?

14 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Zidane and Ronaldo in the 2000s. Messi and Ronaldo in the 2010s. But who’s going to define this decade of world football? Marcus, Jim and Andy run t...

The Preview Show: It's all been for this

13 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

18 years of this daft little podcast. All of it - every last episode - has been for this day to arrive: the fully-formed, gloriously-conceived FIFA Cl...

The 2026 World Cup: One year to go!

12 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

There are just 364 days until the World Cup kicks off in the Azteca Stadium. It's a good job there's nothing else overshadowing it this time...Marcus,...

Is it panic stations yet?

11 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Turns out Thomas Tuchel is the bravest boy of all. A 4-4-2 tribute act, even when it doesn’t suit this team or opposition? RULE BRITANNIA!Seriously ...

A POISONING YOU SAY?

10 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

We all remember Jesse Marsch looking a little out of his depth while guiding Leeds United towards Premier League relegation. Well, it seems you can't ...

Have you got a book about disasters

09 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Portugal have lifted the Nations League once more! Bobby Martínez's boys edged it on penalties in a fighting performance that well and truly puts the...

Mailbag: Who's gone under the radar this season?

07 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Not everyone can be a headline grabber. While the usual suspects have lapped up the plaudits, some have been quietly brilliant in the background – s...

The Preview Show: Gothball

06 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Vindication – at last – for Marcus Speller and the Nations League! Spain and France had a nine-goal punch-up last night and what can only be descr...