Chapter 1: What humorous airport experiences do the hosts share?
Sup, gigglers.
Harriet, fix the Wi-Fi. Manifest that shit. We can't be managed. I mean, the day just got away from me.
What's up, my glossy gigglers? Oh.
I don't know. Okay. I don't know. I'm having fun. You look so gorgeous today. And I came in being like, it's Friday. I'm going to be like in sweats. I'm doing like no makeup. I'm wearing a see-through poncho. I know. You sat down and I was like, oh, okay, Shaw.
I was also 10 minutes late. And I said, look, if you want me to look pretty, I will be 10 minutes late. If you want me to look ugly, I'll be early.
Pick your poison. You know what I used for the first time? You know, that's it's like this makeup. It's called Ella Rose's. I used a little bit of their like a blush and eyebrow gel. Obsessed. I was just like, it's a Friday morning. I'm not trying to do too much. I know.
I think less is more. Yeah. Especially with your cheekbones.
And it was like rainy and cold. And I was like, got to go. Should we get into it? Enough of the niceties. Should we just start with like our day? Our raw, real emotions. Oh, sorry. Coming to you live is your 2026 podcast of the year winners, which... So I was like, Paige, we're not going to win.
And she was like, just like believe in ourselves. And I'm like...
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Chapter 2: What big announcement does Paige make during the episode?
We're boarding at 640. Yes. Yes.
Chapter 3: How do the hosts feel about their podcast award nominations?
I leave at 5.30. Yes, as you should. Hannah's like, I'm going to leave at 5.50. I'm like, okay, something in my gut is just... No, I woke up at 5.50. I'm FaceTiming her in the line. I'm like, it's not good here.
It's not good. And I'm in the elevator. So I'm like, oh, can't hear you. I'm in the elevator. Hang up on her. And you text me and you're like, it's really bad. Which reminds me of my mom who like has to be at the airport four hours early. And I'm like, you silly mom.
You don't have to be there.
So I'm like, I'm glad that Paige is being like prepared. One of us has to. But like, I live 10 minutes from the airport. I'll see you soon. Right. It's before 7 a.m. Right. Like there's nothing. What could happen? What could possibly happen?
so first of all we you know when you get to the place and like there's so many cars that you can't get out the uber and also i didn't have an uber driver that was like on my team like he was very relaxed yeah like it was like there were openings he wasn't taking it and i was like you're the first flight out you're fine so then i we're not even parked and i'm like sir i need to get out and he was like you can't get out here and i'm like yeah again like watch me so i got out
i was like five stars thank you um get to the front now when i tell you the lines were out the door yeah i fly a lot instead of me just being like what's going along i'm like okay i'm gonna outsmart this i'm gonna strategize but i look down and i don't have my pre-check on which is like that was like some some god shit like they were like actually mercury is in retrograde oh i know
No, I felt it. So I decide, okay, I can wait in line to try to get them to put pre-check on it. So I start with that. Also, I went to the kiosk and the kiosk said, go fuck yourself. You ever try a kiosk and they're like, no. Has a kiosk ever worked for anyone?
I get that TSA is having a moment. They're having a problem. I'm not even coming for them. This is not TSA's fault. This is the government's fault. The people that work, though, for the airline... That like some of the rudest, some of the meanest people I've actually met.
And by the way, when I'm at an airport, it's fight or flight. Like I'm not thinking logically. So you're texting me and you're like, I just got through. Are you OK? And I'm like, I'm locked in. I'm figuring this out. So the kiosk doesn't work. I'm like, I'm going to wait, get precheck. And then the precheck line is long, though. But I'm like, this is my only way.
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Chapter 4: What challenges do the hosts face while traveling to Austin?
I feel like clear is the biggest scam ever.
shout out to clear save my life though okay but anyway but now that everyone has it the line is almost like yeah but i feel like they've gotten better we're now it's anyway long story short i finally see clear now mind you page is texting me she goes how's it going and i realized page i've been here for 30 minutes i'm still not even in a line you've just
Standing in the airport for 25 minutes. Fighting demons. What should we do? Because you know that decision is make or break. If you're getting on the plane or not.
If I committed to the wrong line, I'm fucked. So instead I was just walking in a little circle. Fighting with myself. I get so big. And you're texting me like, are we doing well? Any update? I'm like, I'm actually...
farther than I was when I first got to the airport. You're like, I'm actually back in the Uber, and I'm going home. Like, I'm not... Now, mind you, at this point, it's 6.40.
So we're boarding. We're boarding, and I still haven't gotten on a line. I'm trying to find where this clear line is. I find the clear line, and they're like, this is pre-check. And I'm like... I do a pre-check. And they're like, we don't care. So I find the non-clear pre-check. It's like 6.50 by now. And I see a giggler. And she's like, hey, I just want to say, like, I love your pod.
And I'm like, hey, Paige is going to fucking kill me. Like, she's on this flight alone. I can't let her fly alone. Also, like, my flight's boarding. And they're like, when? I'm like, 15 minutes ago. And then she's like.
And I'm sitting on the plane asking the flight attendant, like, Hey, like, do you think you guys are like running on time or like what's your vibe for shutting the door? And she looks at me and she goes and she's like, what? And I'm like, my friend, she's coming. And she looks me dead in the face and goes, we're not holding the plane for your friend. And I'm like, oh, OK. This is my thing.
You're very powerful. So I was like, Paige. Work your fucking magic. You get that plane to stop. Tell them there's a VIP who wakes, who sleeps too late. But by the way, you're like comfortable. Mind you, they were late shutting the door and they did wait for my friend. So, so by the way, I finally get to I get to the right line. And now I'm like, sorry, I'm boarding and people.
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Chapter 5: How do the hosts handle airport security mishaps?
And they're like, you dumb bitch, we don't care. We're not getting paid. And I'm like, valid, valid. This is all happening. I'm not telling you these details because I don't want to stress you out further. When I tell you they put it back in, they took the laptop out. I grabbed my laptop, grabbed my backpack, just holding my laptop bare. Raw dogging.
Laptop.
And we're back at it again, running through the airport. And I texted you and I was like, and I don't want to make matters worse, but we're the last possible gate. We're like 55.
With this airport run, I put my phone in my pocket because we're 30 minutes past boarding now. The door is closed. We're in Texas.
We're in Texas.
But I'm giving it like a last ditch. And I go, I don't even want to know that I failed yet. I'm just going to try. And I'm thinking knees up, knees up, knees up. I get so tired. I have to stop, catch my breath. That is the most embarrassing when people see you stop and then start again. I'm running. I'm running. I'm running. I'm running. It goes. It felt like I was running for two hours.
Even when I was walking there, I stopped. I was like, that's a far gate. This is long. Now we're 35 minutes past boarding, you guys. Like, I'm not making this flight. I'm texting Grace, and she's like, there's no other flights to Austin. And I'm like, damn, I bought this, like, crazy dress. I'm not going to be able to wear it. Paige is going to be there all scared alone.
No, I would have gotten ā I would have landed in Austin and gotten on another flight back home. Like, I wasn't doing that without you.
But you also were like, should I get off this plane? And it gave a really romantic rom-com moment, like ā Should I get off the plane and just be with you?
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