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H3 Podcast

Clavicular Shoots An Alligator & Gets Arrested - H3 After Dark #32

28 Mar 2026

Transcription

Chapter 1: What is discussed at the start of this section?

0.031 - 1.312 Harley

Three, two.

0

1.332 - 49.299 Kate

Welcome to David's victory lap, everybody. Happy Friday. Look at it. Look at it. Give yourself applause, David. Oh, my hands. How are you doing, Harley? I'm doing good. It's Friday. David just got a sick watch. I know. That's crazy. I can't believe it really happened. I thought this was just, I did not think that Ethan would really. Yeah, shout out to him.

0

49.58 - 51.062 Ethan Klein

Yeah, shout out.

0

51.203 - 76.175 Kate

That is insane. But it's after dark, so I got to get a little tactless for a second. You could do whatever you want with that watch. That's your watch. You could sell it. Sell it tonight. You don't even have to feel bad. I'll tell you, when I saw Ethan at one point, he was up in Blackjack in Bahamas and he tossed me like $500 chip.

0

77.317 - 77.457

Mm-hmm.

77.858 - 98.078 Kate

I was like sick and he was busy and I went, you know, I want to eat something, whatever. And then he met up with me a couple hours later. He's like, oh, let's hit the tables. And I was like, I don't really gamble much. And he was like, oh, you got 500 bucks. And I was like, I paid my hotel, dude. The fuck you think this is? What do you think this is? And he's like, oh, come on.

Chapter 2: What watch did David receive and why is it significant?

98.478 - 124.24 Kate

We ended up going and I was up. Having said that, though, having said that, if I were you, I'd be screaming a lot more about it. I'd be screaming a lot more, but it's very sick. I think that's like a keep it forever watch. Hell yeah. It's like, it is one of those watches already. And I was looking it up, like getting the information.

0

124.3 - 142.118 Kate

Some of the interesting information to me was that it's a really resilient watch. What does that mean? So you can wear that daily. Wear that bad boy daily. And then Zach said something that was kind of a joke, but actually it's true. You do have to eat different. Here comes Ethan. Is he going to? Oh, he's naked.

0

142.379 - 143.465 Unknown

Oh, he's naked.

0

143.486 - 146.442 Kate

It almost looks like I have a tan line.

0

147.282 - 153.935 Ethan Klein

Do I have a watch team? Oh, get mocked. Get mocked. David, put it up.

153.975 - 159.846 Kate

Watch Max. Watch Max. Watch Max. That's it. Mock. Mocking the fuck out of him.

160.448 - 160.788 David

Thanks, bro.

160.888 - 173.698 Kate

Wow. What a sick day at work you had, David. Thank you. What a sick day at work. What a great Friday. What an amazing Friday. And Teddy, wow, what an arm on that kid. Must be from the inside.

174.459 - 175.44 Unknown

Arguably better than Ethan.

Chapter 3: What are the implications of gambling discussed in this episode?

204.704 - 226.135 Kate

Oh, the eating, yeah. As a joke, yeah, you do have to eat different. I'll be honest, you can't have chicken nuggets and ketchup with a watch like that. You can't. You have to do something else. It doesn't have to be duck sauce. That's like what are the chances you're going to have that available, but you got to hit something different. For sure. And I know, and you're not wrong.

0

226.155 - 238.967 Kate

Americans, you guys love ranch. Wait, can I ask a question? Ranch is having a moment right now. Yeah. When you say ketchup and ranch, you're not mixing them, right? No, he's not. No, am I crazy? No.

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239.027 - 239.568 Unknown

I don't know.

0

239.668 - 254.983 Kate

I thought that's why people were grossed out. Wow, you think so low of every guy, eh? No! You think he's Android-coded mixing ketchup and ranch together? I'll do like a barbecue sauce and ranch. I'll mix those.

0

255.704 - 256.545 Ethan Klein

No, I don't even.

256.645 - 275.417 Kate

Yeah, I don't really. I don't like that. You're not a ranch guy. But I'm not going to comment too much. Even though I am the sauce boss, I feel like it's my expertise. Where I come from, French fries, we do ketchup and mayo. And some people like to make a pink sauce. I prefer to dip mayo and then ketchup.

276.078 - 279.805 Harley

Right. I mean, Thousand Island is essentially ketchup and mayo and like pickles.

279.785 - 300.334 Kate

Yeah, I made that. I just made that a couple because we did once I got home from L.A., we did St. Patrick's Day and I always make corned beef and I it's like my favorite thing to make. And next day I made Reuben's for us and I made the Thousand Island because we didn't have any. It was so good. So sick. I love Reuben. It's really easy to make.

300.434 - 304.98 Kate

Like you said, David, it was ketchup, mayo and relish. I think that was it.

Chapter 4: How do the hosts feel about food preferences and cooking?

305.021 - 329.637 Kate

I think it was those three things. It was fucking banger. Thousand Island is goaded for sure. Yeah, but ketchup on chicken tendies, you can't do that. And also not nuggets either. Like a tendie feels to me like ketchup is super basic, but like a nug from McDonald's, specifically with McDonald's ketchup, which is like more vinegary, which I really like. I like that.

0

329.836 - 353.624 Kate

i i ketchup i'm sorry sweet and sour sauce at mcdonald's in canada the green top yeah uh yeah that's my that's my number one i hid some of those in ethan's house actually i was like for the next time i come back but i don't know who he's got working there because someone found them someone found them yeah they were gone oh no you're used i'm just happy they got used Did you wait?

0

353.644 - 361.454 Kate

So you brought, you smuggled them in. We had McDonald's and I told him, I was like, by the way, I always get extra. I'm going to put, I'm going to put these somewhere for the next time.

0

361.474 - 361.654 Ethan Klein

Oh, okay.

0

361.734 - 381.12 Kate

Okay. So yeah, we have, I mean, we, we have this, is it the same as Canada? The same sweet and sour? It used to be a purple top sweet and sour. Did it? And it would taste different. Wasn't it? The green top is like the OG, triple OG. That's the boy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's the boy.

381.14 - 381.501 Unknown

Got you.

381.521 - 389.372 Kate

Now, for me... David needs to acknowledge you can't have ketchup on chicken tendies. He's got... David, your power level has grown exponentially there.

389.453 - 389.813 Ethan Klein

Yes, sir.

389.833 - 403.093 Kate

Kate, are you into watches at all? No. Okay. It's crazy. Like, amongst men... I've learned. Amongst men, watches is actually... It's a joke on the show, but it's not a joke.

Chapter 5: What insights are shared about Diet Coke chicken?

5519.684 - 5544.45 Kate

Can't hate the player, though. Of course not. To some degree, we all do some of it, right? A little bit of rage bait, a little bit of like, oh, I'll leave that imperfection in so people notice it. But making your entire career off of fucking with people like this is just so weird to me. It is not the worst fucking though, right?

0

5544.835 - 5568.278 Kate

no no it's just bizarre it's not even as i i honestly the worst thing you could say is be like hope she eats that chicken yeah it's just like she eats her uh her diet coke chicken it's very immature do you know what i mean like it's all kids that are like ew it's diet coke chicken night james gets the job sucks basically the job sucks

0

5569.169 - 5575.758 Unknown

Where he brings home a couple cans of Diet Coke, I know that's kind of my cue to make Diet Coke chicken. I'm gonna add my ketchup.

0

5575.778 - 5584.21 Kate

I thought it looked so good just now, I just kinda eyeball it. Absolutely not. It's really all about consistency. Is there any non-food that goes into this?

0

5586.453 - 5587.414 Unknown

Let's see.

5587.478 - 5593.365 Kate

Like if you want to know, like she like the last lady, like used a scrub brush full of soap.

5593.385 - 5594.947 Unknown

No, no, nothing like that.

5594.967 - 5596.589 Kate

As far as I think they really eat it.

5596.669 - 5603.958 Unknown

Diet Coke chicken in any search engine and it'll pop right up. It's a pretty popular recipe. And then I'm going to go ahead and add in the good chicken.

Chapter 6: How does the conversation shift to Clavicular's arrest?

5626.902 - 5641.279 Kate

Yeah. Didn't brown her meat, though. Just straight into the juice. Just straight in. Just straight into the ketchup and Diet Coke. I mean, listen, I've heard of similar things coming out of the Midwest.

0

5642.39 - 5668.86 Kate

well yeah i mean not this bad you can use coke to like braise short ribs and you know stuff like that but this way of doing it just no seasoning no vegetables awful just boiling diet coke and also it's diet coke not coke so it's not even like the real sugar you're not getting any like caramelization or anything no be kind What? What is this?

0

5669.921 - 5670.762 Unknown

That's a pineapple.

0

5671.443 - 5676.731 Kate

Thank you, David. What is this for? I'm going to put the peas in the microwave. Dude, I can't do canned peas.

0

5677.172 - 5679.495 Unknown

Peas in the microwave. Do you hear that? Peas in the microwave.

5679.936 - 5681.478 Kate

Peas in the microwave, yeah.

5682.059 - 5685.864 Unknown

Here's an update on the chicken. It's looking good. All right, and here's our dinner.

5687.026 - 5699.332 Kate

Guys, I think she really eats this. No, yeah, because look what I thought about this when I first saw it. She swapped it out. Or the camera, maybe this is front facing now. Oh no, I just meant the chicken looks different.

5700.193 - 5701.114 Ethan Klein

Oh, the chicken looks different.

Chapter 7: What details emerge about the incident involving the alligator?

5707.323 - 5729.385 Kate

Let's see the, look at the thing in the back. It's the green boxes on the right of that white bag. Let's see if we see it in something else. I need to see if she's taunting us. No, it's a different angle. It just, it just, it gets flipped when you're, when you film. That's, that's it. I think so. Yeah. So does she do a lot of these insane food things? Or is that like the big one?

0

5729.405 - 5735.312 Kate

Guys, I... What is this? What even is that?

0

5735.372 - 5738.535 Harley

That looks like chorizo.

0

5739.897 - 5740.597 Unknown

I'm going to stir.

0

5740.617 - 5740.738 Harley

Maybe.

5741.559 - 5742.079 Kate

Does it?

5742.099 - 5745.943 Unknown

All right, I grabbed a new pan. I'm going to add some butter.

5747.605 - 5769.816 Kate

What the fuck is happening in America? This is a family size. It doesn't seem like that much. She's getting better at filming. She's getting better at filming, you said? Filming and cutting. Yeah, you said it looks tighter. Maybe she actually stocked up enough to get someone who's down to chop it up. Maybe. Is that like a sauce? Maybe that was like a sauce in the pan?

Chapter 8: What conclusions are drawn about Clavicular's actions and their consequences?

5773.306 - 5797.255 Kate

okay we're doing I think I want to we're doing things we're making fried rice with guys I think she ate that diet Coke chicken yeah I think she was making show to the end yeah but then all the lady was clearly rage baiting this doesn't feel like rage bait this is what she showed at the end look look normal yeah I would have eaten what she showed yeah but then if she was like guess what the sauce is

0

5798.264 - 5818.568 Kate

I tried to, the guy I was talking about before, Amir, the guy that was drinking out of the garbage. Yeah, sure. I tried to workshop Diet Coke toast with him for Epic Mealtime for a long time. Diet Coke toast. How would that work? Like French toast? Don't know. Sometimes you say the name of the meal and then work from there. Oh. Diet Coke toast was an interesting thought I wanted to try.

0

5818.588 - 5819.589 Ethan Klein

Well, I think I just fixed it for you.

0

5819.609 - 5823.934 Kate

Yeah, I think you did. Free fire. Just a little egg and Diet Coke together? Yeah.

0

5825.112 - 5850.715 Kate

and then maybe reduce some for syrup i'd have to put some chicken on there too yeah hell yeah yeah like chicken and waffles yeah because look at the attraction this one got yeah for real when are we starting our rage baiting food channel right now right now i mean yeah this looks fine this looks like i've seen money right here this looks like white people fried rice that's gonna get us into doors and you got to bring that into meetings hell yeah that's true

5851.758 - 5863.669 Kate

I'm sorry, I didn't see your watch. I'm listening now. Yeah. And when anyone talks to you, lick about it, be like, oh, what, this old thing? Oh, yeah. No, it's my EDC, but you should see what I got at home.

5864.049 - 5866.251 Ethan Klein

Yeah, and I got it from being so good.

5866.291 - 5873.197 Kate

Everyday Carrie watch. Everyday Carrie. Yeah, it was like a sauce. I think that's for the chicken. It's for the chicken.

5873.598 - 5876.22 Unknown

Oh, it came out sausage-like.

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