Handing the Shame Back

Survivor Interview: John

21 Apr 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Meet JohnSRA Survivor. Spiritual War Fighter. Philosopher.John suppressed his childhood sexual abuse for 24 years. He is now 6 years into his healing,...

Survivor Interview: Shereen Simmonds

07 Apr 2026

Contributed by Lukas

 Meet Shereen SimmondsAdvocate. Founder of Phoenix FiveShereen grew up in a family where attention was not directed her way. Her uncle provided that ...

Survivor Interview: Rob Balfour

17 Mar 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Meet Rob BalfourSurvivor. Just Me. ActivistAt the age of 4, Rob was found wandering around the streets and said he would rather die than ‘go home’...

Survivor Interview: Caroline Hunt

03 Mar 2026

Contributed by Lukas

 Meet Caroline HuntAdvocate. Survivor. AuthorShe was brought up in a strict Mormon home in a large Samoan family, where her parents were devout follo...

Survivor Interview: Dave Lukins

17 Feb 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Meet Dave LukinsSurvivor. Father of twins.Dave first experienced abuse at the age of 7 in the toilets at school. Then again at 11 - 13 from a sports c...

Tips for Survivors: Feeling Off

10 Feb 2026

Contributed by Lukas

We Survivors are allowed to have off days. Healing isn’t linear, and some days will feel heavier than others. It’s okay to rest, to feel, and to t...

Survivor Interview: Staci Reay

03 Feb 2026

Contributed by Lukas

 Meet Staci ReaySurvivor. AdvocateStaci was abused between 3-17 years of age by her father, who she later discovered was NOT her biological father. H...

Survivor Interview: Damien Diver

20 Jan 2026

Contributed by Lukas

 Meet Damien DiverSurvivor. Married father of 3. Primary School Teacher.Damien was abused in 2003 at age of 16 by a family friend while working with ...

2025 Xmas Message from the Board

23 Dec 2025

Contributed by Lukas

It’s Christmas.Getting through Christmas, can be an overwhelming ask for us as survivors. While many people experience joy and celebration during th...

Survivor Interview: Alyssa Milligan

16 Dec 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Meet Alyssa MilliganAdvocate for School Student Survivors. Article Writer. High School Student.Alyssa is an incredible 16-year-old advocate who is wan...

2025 Xmas Panel Discussion

09 Dec 2025

Contributed by Lukas

It's that time of year again and we have an exciting panel discussion lined up for you. Meet Ali Mau, Survivor, recent Author and Co-founder of T...

Survivor Interview: John Comerford

02 Dec 2025

Contributed by Lukas

 Meet John ComerfordSurvivor. Mental Health Ambassador. AuthorJohn was abused in a catholic school beginning when he was 11 years old. His abuser was...

Blog: Telling Someone

25 Nov 2025

Contributed by Lukas

When is the right time to disclose what happened to you as a child? There is no one answer to this. Disclosing childhood sexual abuse is deeply person...

Q&A Session: November 2025

20 Nov 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Every month we provide answers to YOUR questions. Yes we do read them, so please reach out to [email protected], we want to help you! ...

Survivor Interview: Dean Clarkson

18 Nov 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Meet Dean ClarksonSurvivor. Trail Blazer. Founder. Father.Dean was 6 years old when he was first abused by an older boy who isolated him while playing...

Tips for Survivors: Survivors and Sleep

11 Nov 2025

Contributed by Lukas

 It is beyond important for everyone to get enough sleep. For survivors it is essential. Sleep is where the mind can relax, unwind and rest. We keep ...

Survivor Interview: Tracy Lee

04 Nov 2025

Contributed by Lukas

 Tracy LeeAuthor. Activist. Lived experience CSA victim.Tracy was the eldest of 4 children and the only girl. Her mother was 17 years old when she ha...

Blog: Overthinking

28 Oct 2025

Contributed by Lukas

 I believe that overthinking is connected to hypervigilance and is part of a post trauma response. For many survivors, overthinking became second nat...

Survivor Interview: Keith Williams

21 Oct 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Keith WilliamsSurvivorKeith was 7 years old when the abuse began by an older brother, this went on till he was 12 years of age, at which point Keith b...

Q&A Session: October 2025

16 Oct 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Please reach out to [email protected], we want to help you! If you have questions, we may have some answers, each month we provide a Q...

Tips for Survivors: Overthinking

14 Oct 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Do you ever find yourself overthinking and wondering why you do it?This can stem from anxiety, fear, and even feelings of not being seen, heard or und...

Survivor Interview: Lisa Mannina

07 Oct 2025

Contributed by Lukas

 Lisa ManninaSurvivor. Pilot. Metastatic Breast Cancer WarriorLisa was abused by her mother's 3rd husband's son who was in his mid to late ...

Blog: Possibilities

23 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

For most of us possibilities are not something we ever seriously consider. We tend to live with thoughts of things not working out for us as opposed t...

Q&A Session: September 2025

18 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

 We want to help you! If you have questions, we may have some answers, each month we provide a Q&A forum for you to help educate and inform. This...

Survivor Interview: Kieron

16 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

 Meet KieronSurvivor. Educator. CEO and Founder of Speak It OutKieron was 6 years old when the abuse began and was to continue until he was 17 years ...

Tips for Survivors: The Mind Dissociates

09 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

 The Mind DissociatesThere is confusion around why this happens, but put simply the mind leaves when the body can’t. For survivors of child sexual ...

Survivor Interview: Isabella Grosso

02 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Meet Isabella GrossoSurvivor. Dancer. AuthorShe was abused from the age of 5 years by family friends and neighbours. She told her Dad, but nothing sto...

Blog: Letting Go

26 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Do you ever find yourself struggling to let go of a situation?Do you ever find yourself uncomfortable with not having control or insight into what hap...

Q&A Session: August 2025

21 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

We want to help you! If you have questions, we may have some answers, each month we provide a Q&A forum for you to help educate and inform. This m...

Survivor Interview: Lee Cooper

19 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

 Meet Lee CooperSurvivor. Advocate. PhotographerHe was abused between 11-13 by a family member. He told no-one until he turned 31 years of age, and t...

Tips for Survivors: Using Instinct to Let Go

12 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Having a quiet time where you can connect in with your inner wisdom, will give you the answers you need. Your higher self is always at play, but you c...

NZ Police Share the Global Hand Sign Message in Te Reo Māori

07 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

 We are fortunate to have a member of NZ Police share the Global Hand Sign message in Te Reo. Please share far and wide so all who need to can see th...

Survivor Interview: Debbra Blosnich

05 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

 Meet Debbra BlosnichSurvivor. Author. Transformational Life CoachBetween the ages of 6 - 18 she was abused by her father, with him telling her you c...

Blog: Reflection

24 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

 Most of us would rather not revisit the past. It was traumatic, frightening, and understandably triggering. But what if I told you that how you appr...

Survivor Interview: Marvin Hitchman

22 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Meet Marvin HitchmanSurvivor. Author. A fighter who wants to make more people aware of child sexual abuse.He was also born in prison. When he was adop...

Q&A Session: July 2025

20 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

This month’s Q&A has a range of questions including: Why use the hand sign when it's for everyone else to use? Do survivors of child sexual...

Tips for Survivors: Guilt

15 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

 The role guilt plays in sexual abuse as a child is varied. Please note, that without exception; if you are a survivor of this trauma, you were undou...

Survivor Interview: Ciara Redmond

08 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

 Meet Ciara RedmondSurvivor of serial predator and serial rapist. Raises awareness.Ciara was raised in a family where once her younger brother had ca...

Survivor Interview: Glenn Miles

24 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

 Meet Glenn MilesSurvivor. Researcher. NurseAlthough he suffered humiliation and sexualised school bullying at the hands of his peers, Glenn was seri...

Survivor Interview: Karen Shell

10 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Meet Karen ShellSurvivor. Nonprofit Founder. Champion for Kids. EntrepreneurKaren was raised in a family where her father was not just sexually abusiv...

Media Spotlight - Interview with NZ Herald (Gloria Masters & Scott Beard)

04 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

 NZ Herald interviews Gloria and her partner Detective Inspector Scott Beard on the Global Hand Sign for Under 16’s to use, showing they are not sa...

Survivor Interview: Jeremy R.

27 May 2025

Contributed by Lukas

 Meet Jeremy R.Survivor. Content Creator. WriterHe was born with Spina Bifida and his parents were told he would never walk let alone live. He is now...

Media Spotlight: Radio Interview with MoreFM Rodney

27 May 2025

Contributed by Lukas

 Being interviewed by Nick on MoreFM Rodney was empowering. Being able to discuss the book; Keeping Kids Safe which is now in every school in NZ, hon...

Blog: Rest and Recovery

20 May 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Rest and Recovery are essential for survivors. Though not often discussed it is crucial for survivors to rest deeply when dealing with this. Thinking ...

Q&A Session: 16 May 2025

15 May 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Q&A SessionJoin us on this Q&A Session where Gloria answers a range of questions posed by you, the Survivors. One for this month includes: how...

Survivor Interview: Cadence P.

13 May 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Meet Cadence P.Survivor. Poet. AdvocateShe was abused by her godmother and her godmother’s father. She was heavily manipulated and groomed to the po...

Tips for Survivors: Rest and Recovery

06 May 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Having survived this trauma, understand that your body went into the 4 trauma responses, fight, flight, freeze of fawn. Reason: You had a lot of adren...

HTSB Global Awareness Day – 16 June

01 May 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Handing the Shame Back is proud to return for the third year in a row with our GLOBAL AWARENESS DAY (16 June).This day is dedicated to raising awarene...

Survivor Interview: Reg Johnston

29 Apr 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Reg JohnstonSurvivor. Trauma Informed AOD Clinician. Survivor AdvocateReg was abused by his sister 13 years older than him, who groomed him at the age...

Blog: Being Triggered

22 Apr 2025

Contributed by Lukas

The known facts about being triggered are these: We don't know when they're going to occur, or how they will occur. What this means is that ...

Q&A Session: 16 April 2025

15 Apr 2025

Contributed by Lukas

 Q&A SessionJoin us on this Q&A Session where Gloria answers questions posed by you, the Survivors. Ranging from how to manage a family who s...

Survivor Interview: Diane Payne

08 Apr 2025

Contributed by Lukas

 Meet Diane PayneSurvivorDiane was sexually abused by her brother-in-law from age 12 to 16. He was 24 when it started. She told no one for 40 years. ...

Tips for Survivors: Guilt and Shame

01 Apr 2025

Contributed by Lukas

 Feelings of shame and guilt are common to Survivors. This is especially true if we had siblings we felt we couldn't protect, or that we had to ...

Survivor Interview: Sue Philip

25 Mar 2025

Contributed by Lukas

 Meet Sue PhilipSurvivorSue was abused from preschool age by her father. She blocked the memories out for many years until she was in her 40’s.. He...

Blog: Mind Games

18 Mar 2025

Contributed by Lukas

 Many people consider that mind games are something that are done to us and that we are being manipulated by others. No one ever considers the bigger...

Parliamentary Select Committee Hearings - Gloria Masters

13 Mar 2025

Contributed by Lukas

 On behalf of Handing the Shame Back, I had the privilege of presenting to the Parliamentary Select Committee on Child Sex Trafficking within NZ, (we...

Survivor Interview: Hanz Freller

11 Mar 2025

Contributed by Lukas

 Meet Hanz FrellerSurvivor Advocate. Dad. AuthorHe was abused in care by a St John of God Brother. The abuse was to span several years and was calcul...

Q&A Session - 7 March 2025

06 Mar 2025

Contributed by Lukas

 First Q&A SessionJoin us on this, our very first Q&A Session where Gloria answers questions posed by you, ‘yes you’, the Survivors. Rang...

Book Distribution Update: Unboxing Day

04 Mar 2025

Contributed by Lukas

 Today marks the start of something powerful — 2,700 books are being unboxed, packaged, and prepared for delivery to schools across New Zealand.Eve...

Tips for Survivors: Feeling Safe Sexually

04 Mar 2025

Contributed by Lukas

 Sometimes as survivors we can feel guilty, frozen or just plain wrong about having sex. As adults this has impact beyond what we can imagine. Have a...

Book Distribution Update: Book Delivery Day

04 Mar 2025

Contributed by Lukas

 Today is the day!We are beyond excited to have received the books, "Keeping Kids Safe", which will be distributed to schools across New Ze...

Survivor Interview: Susan Gold

25 Feb 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Meet Susan GoldSurvivor, Author and Transformationalist.She was the middle child born in a family where generational abuse was undealt with and theref...

Book Distribution Donation Update - 21 February 2025

20 Feb 2025

Contributed by Lukas

We have now raised $2,500. If you are able to help, please use this direct link: https://donate.stripe.com/aEU4iIfR1b8Pdpu7ss and include the referenc...

Blog: Sex and Adult Survivors

18 Feb 2025

Contributed by Lukas

It is entirely natural for you as a survivor of child sexual abuse to struggle with sex as an adult. some survivors have a constant battle with this, ...

Tips for Survivors: Managing Guilt

11 Feb 2025

Contributed by Lukas

As children, we were always dependent on the adults around us to meet our needs. This is common and expected, as we were unable to feed or clothe ours...

Survivor Interview: Steven Shelton

04 Feb 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Meet Steven SheltonSurvivor and AuthorWas abused by many males beginning when he was just 4 years old. His mother walked in on the abuse, saw it, and ...

Introducing the Q&A Session

30 Jan 2025

Contributed by Lukas

We are thrilled to provide answers to any questions you may have — let's interact! We want to provide information you need, in order to do that...

Survivor Interview: Elizabeth Melendez

28 Jan 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Meet Elizabeth MelendezAuthor. Advocate. CEO/Founder of the Foundation United Org.She was sexually abused by a family friend at age 11, though saw tha...

Blog: New Year Resolutions

21 Jan 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Don't make any new year resolutions, instead reflect on what you have achieved over the last 12 months and honour that. You may consider growing ...

Book Distribution Donation Update

16 Jan 2025

Contributed by Lukas

We are bringing you this update due to the generous and much appreciated response to our video asking for help to get the book ‘Keeping Kids Safe - ...

Want to Save Some Kids?

16 Jan 2025

Contributed by Lukas

We are seeking sponsors so we can distribute the book 'Keeping Kids Safe' to every school in NZ. We have the books funded, just not the dist...

Survivor Interview: Avery Kearney

14 Jan 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Meet Avery KearneySurvivor. Advocate. Non-profit worker in the health sector.Avery is a survivor of sexual abuse at the hands of his uncle from the ag...

Xmas Panel Discussion 2024

17 Dec 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Welcome back to Louise Nicholas and Ken Clearwater who join me on the this panel, to discuss all things Survivors experience throughout the Xmas seaso...

HTSB Xmas Board Message

10 Dec 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Here is our Xmas Message from the Board at Handing the Shame Back Foundation, to all the amazing survivors, supporters and sponsors we have. Thank you...

Blog: It's Christmas

03 Dec 2024

Contributed by Lukas

It’s Christmas.Getting through Christmas, can be an overwhelming ask for us as survivors. While many people experience joy and celebration during th...

Survivor Tip: Managing

26 Nov 2024

Contributed by Lukas

This time of year can be difficult when trying to manage end of year events, Xmas interactions and school concerts. Try to find time to ground yoursel...

Survivor Interview: Deb Aldrick

12 Nov 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Deb AldrickAuthor. Speaker. AdvocateDeb was abused from 5 - 14 by a family member while another family member did nothing to protect her. Pre-abuse sh...

Survivor Interview: Raymond Lum

05 Nov 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Meet Raymond LumSurvivor and Film ProducerAs a young boy, he was sexually abused by their female live in nanny for years. When he eventually told his ...

Blog: Coercive Control

31 Oct 2024

Contributed by Lukas

As survivors of child sexual abuse, it is widely accepted that we were controlled through grooming simply so the abuser could exploit us. What is less...

Blog: Resolution

23 Oct 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Be aware if you are deciding on how to confront your abuser, your emotions will be running at an all time high, and therefore deciding on something of...

Survivor Interview: Kel Humphries - Part 2

20 Oct 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Meet Kel HumphriesSurvivor. Advocate. Speaker. Researcher.She was abused by her Uncle between ages  7 - 8,  and recognises the grooming for what it ...

Survivor Tip: Losing Your Voice

17 Oct 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Losing your voiceAs children being abused we couldn't speak, because our brain froze.This is a trauma response,  and just so you know: when your...

Gloria Masters interviewed by Shaun Attwood (Oct 2024)

16 Oct 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Gloria returns to Shaun’s platform to discuss the impact of CSA on survivors in light of the current media storm around P Diddy. She shares her stor...

Survivor Interview: Kel Humphries - Part 1

13 Oct 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Meet Kel HumphriesSurvivor. Advocate. Speaker. Researcher.She was abused by her Uncle between ages  7 -8, and now realises her parents were the ones ...

Tips for Supporting Survivors: Negative Self Talk

10 Oct 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Negative self talkIt is more common than not for your survivor to put themselves down and talk about themselves negatively. This is part of, or a cons...

Survivor Interview: Uipo Tagaloasa - Part 2

06 Oct 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Uipo Tagaloasa Part 2Was born and raised in Samoa without his father, who had passed away before he was born.He has 11 siblings, and was raised by gra...

Survivor Tip: Needing Love

03 Oct 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Needing loveAs children being abused we were looking for some love from those tasked with caring for us.We were children, with needs not being met, an...

Survivor Interview: Uipo Tagaloasa - Part 1

30 Sep 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Uipo TagaloasaWas born and raised in Samoa without his father, who had passed away before he was born.He has 11 siblings, and was raised by grandparen...

Blog: Never Give Up

25 Sep 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Sometimes it can all feel a bit much when trying to work your way through the trauma the abuse created. Sometimes it feels easier to just give up work...

Survivor Interview: Janet Jacobsen - Part 2

22 Sep 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Meet Janet JacobsenGrandmother, wife, mother, football lover and survivor.Janet's story continues. You can reach out to her on Facebook as Janet...

Survivor Tip: You Do You

18 Sep 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Even though you may feel that you should take other's advice on what action you should take regarding the abuse you suffered: like (for example),...

Survivor Interview: Janet Jacobsen - Part 1

15 Sep 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Meet Janet JacobsenGrandmother, wife, mother, football lover and survivor.Janet was abused by a doctor while her father was dying. she also had a loca...

Tips for Supporting Survivors: Resolution Options

11 Sep 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Resolution OptionsBecause we are all different, so are our views on how to get resolution regarding our abuse. For some of us it may be finding forgi...

Featuring Gloria Masters

08 Sep 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Gloria talks about her life story.What she experienced and what led her to do the work she does on Handing the Shame Back.HELPNZ    Sexual Harm Help...

Survivor Tip: Never Give Up

04 Sep 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Never Give UpEven tho it can feel tough at times, please keep going on your individual survivor path. That could be making sense of what happened to y...

Feature Interview: Abuse in care

01 Sep 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Meet Three incredible survivors of Abuse in Care.Malcolm Justice. Phill Ashworth and Neil Harding.Their stories will move you.For more on this please ...

Puzzle Solved Blog

28 Aug 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Every wonder why you struggle with certain areas in your life?This could be anything: Confidence, speaking up, relationships, even food.I liken it to ...

Heidi Olson Interview - Part 2

25 Aug 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Meet Heidi Olson Forensic nurse. Business owner. Coffee lover and outdoor enthusiast.She was first abused at 2 years of age, and experienced several ...

Survivor Tip #54: Purity

21 Aug 2024

Contributed by Lukas

PurityIf you are a survivor who emerged from a strict religious sect or background, you are not alone.The conditioning around purity, virginity and in...

Heidi Olson Interview - Part 1

18 Aug 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Meet Heidi Olson Forensic nurse. Business owner. Coffee lover and outdoor enthusiast.Heidi did not feel seen growing up. She was first abused at 2 y...