Pretty Little Episode #92

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Handsome 21 min 4 speakers 8 chapters transcribed 4 months ago
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What humorous anecdotes do Tig and Fortune share about their recent experiences?

Tig Notaro 0:01
This is a HeadGum Podcast.
Mae Martin 0:06
Checking Allstate First could save you hundreds on car insurance. Not checking the weather forecast before I wear my shorts? Yikes! I wanted to show off my gams, but it's still a little chilly outside and now I'm regretting my wardrobe choices.
Fortune Feimster 0:19
Yeah, checking first is handsome. So check Allstate first for an auto quote. It could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Potential savings vary subject to terms, conditions, and availability. Allstate North American Insurance Company and affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois.
Unknown 0:42
Pretty little episode.
Fortune Feimster 0:48
Hey, it's your friend Tig Notaro on the pretty little episode of Handsome.
Mae Martin 0:54
And I'm sitting here with Fortune Beamster. How are you, Fortune? I'm so good. I just got back from Costco.
Fortune Feimster 1:07
Why is that good?
Mae Martin 1:09
What happened there? I love a Costco trip. Okay. What'd you get? I went to get a television because I'm still figuring out my house.
Unknown 1:21
Okay.
Mae Martin 1:21
And I ended up moving one of the guest rooms in my office. I switched them. And now that I've switched them, I wasn't going to get a TV in that guest room, but now it's a bigger room. And I'm like, I think it needs a TV.
Okay.
Fortune Feimster 1:35
Hmm. Here's this is going to surprise you.
Mae Martin 1:39
Yeah.
Fortune Feimster 1:39
I didn't know Costco sold TV. So I thought it was just like bulk food.
Mae Martin 1:44
They sell everything, and honestly, their TVs are a very good deal. Okay. I got this TV, 55-inch, Sony, which is now TCL, I think, 300 bucks.
Fortune Feimster 1:59
What's TCL? TCL, what's TCL?
Mae Martin 2:01
It's now, what was Sony is now TCL. It's just the same.
Fortune Feimster 2:06
Oh, it's a company?
Mae Martin 2:08
Yeah. Oh, okay. But 300 bucks, great TV, that's... Come on now. Come on now. And then while I was there, I picked up some smart water and water. I'm not good at flossing, so I got a water pick. You know what I'm talking about?
Fortune Feimster 2:29
Of course I do. And you're not good. Meaning when you floss, there's still chunks of beef in there or like you're not good to remember.
Mae Martin 2:37
To remember. So I'm hoping to put this in my routine now. Brush my teeth, water pick.
Fortune Feimster 2:46
Wait, not your stand-up routine.
Mae Martin 2:48
No.
Fortune Feimster 2:49
Okay.
Mae Martin 2:50
No, my teeth routine.

What nostalgic stories do the hosts have about their first cars?

Fortune Feimster 2:53
Okay, your dental routine.
Mae Martin 2:55
That's right. What's up?
Fortune Feimster 2:58
I was just going to ask, did you just recently visit the dentist? And they were like, man, you got to get on this.
Mae Martin 3:04
No, I didn't recently go, but they have every time I've gone told me you have to floss. So I just saw it and remembered. And then I also got some sunscreen. I mean, it's really a one-stop shop.
Fortune Feimster 3:17
Yeah, okay. And the $300 TV, what would that be if you were not shopping at Costco?
Mae Martin 3:25
Maybe somewhere else might be $500. Okay, so you almost could buy a whole other TV. Yeah, $450, something like that. It just depends on where you get it. And then they have wall mounts for the television for like $60. And then if you go to somewhere else, they don't have as many selections, and theirs are like $120 and up. I mean, I'm not sponsored by Costco. I'm just telling you I went there.
Fortune Feimster 3:53
And then how many TVs do you have in your house?

How does Fortune describe her first car experience?

Mae Martin 3:57
This makes three.
Fortune Feimster 3:59
Okay.
Mae Martin 4:00
All right. Yeah.
Fortune Feimster 4:01
Do you have one of those little tiny ones in the kitchen like how they used to have like in childhood? You know, mom.
Mae Martin 4:07
I know those are so funny. I don't know because I don't. My den and kitchen are kind of all in one thing. So to have an extra little mini TV would be weird. I also don't cook enough. I feel like those were for the moms that were cooking for long periods of time. And dads. And dads, sure. They had to watch their stories.
Fortune Feimster 4:34
That's right. And then are you somebody that likes a TV in your bathtub? Yeah.
Mae Martin 4:39
No, I don't have one in my bathroom. There's not anywhere to put it.

What unique challenges did Tig face with her first car?

Mae Martin 4:43
My bathroom's very... When you come over, you'll see. There's nowhere to hang anything.
Fortune Feimster 4:51
Well, I know sometimes people have them in the wall.
Mae Martin 4:54
Yeah, I know. Yeah, okay. I like a TV, but I don't need it in all these random places.
Fortune Feimster 5:01
Because I'm always fascinated, not amused, fascinated by people that have a TV or like when you're in a hotel room and they have a TV in the tub. Yeah, that's just... Like I was hoping to pick your brain about it.
Mae Martin 5:19
That feels very old school, though. I don't think people are putting TVs in the bathrooms in modern times.

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