My Boyfriend Thinks My Ex is My Cousin | Punters Confessions

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Happy Hour with Lucy & Nikki 44 min 3 speakers 8 chapters transcribed 4 months ago
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What confessions do Lucy and Nikki share about relationships?

Lucy Jackson 0:02
This is Happier with Lucy and Nikki.
Nikki Westcott 0:11
And if you're easily offended, then this might not be for you. Like, I see the DMs that some of our boyfriends get and they are getting sexted, babe. Yeah. They're getting full bumhole pics.
Yeah.
Lucy Jackson 0:25
Bumhole specifically.
Nikki Westcott 0:26
And honestly, it's water for ducks back for these boys.
Lucy Jackson 0:28
And honestly, I'm going to put it out there. I don't want to send my bumhole to anyone because that's not that hot. I don't, I'm not into bumhole shots.
Nikki Westcott 0:35
Or like, I would never. No, but like, even like your vagina. I'm like, it's quite raw and real. Cheers, babes.

How do Lucy and Nikki discuss the impact of social media on dating?

Nikki Westcott 0:44
I'm going to happy hour with Lucy and Nikki, the real life shit you only discuss over a drink. But before we start, a little disclaimer.
Lucy Jackson 0:49
So today we are here to talk about confessions.
Nikki Westcott 0:53
These are our confessions. You have written in.
Lucy Jackson 0:57
What's come to confess your sins? Hello, child. You today have come to confess your sins.
Nikki Westcott 1:03
The little box thing. Does that actually exist?
Lucy Jackson 1:05
Yeah. Well, there used to be one at the church that I went to when I was at Catholic school. Really? I never went in there.
Nikki Westcott 1:11
Is there box hours, like confession hours?

What embarrassing moments do listeners share?

Nikki Westcott 1:13
They can't just be in there all the time. Or is it just like box and air?
Lucy Jackson 1:17
I don't know how it works. No, no, no. Usually there's a man in there. Yeah.
Nikki Westcott 1:21
Yes, Tram. Imagine if the man actually, like, was Gossip Girl. Do you know what I mean? Like, I've been watching Bridgerton again. I was like... What's her name? Lady... Lazy Lady Whistledown.
Lucy Jackson 1:34
Oh, I could not get around Bridgerton personally.
Nikki Westcott 1:37
It's Bridgerton, first of all. Didn't I say that?

How does one listener handle a situation with a cheating ex?

Nikki Westcott 1:40
I think you said Bridgerton. Bridgerton? It's Bridgerton.
Lucy Jackson 1:44
Yeah, Bridgerton.
Nikki Westcott 1:45
Oh, I thought you said Bridgerton.
Lucy Jackson 1:46
No. I can speak, you mongrel. How good's the word mongrel? No, but today we have your confessions, guys. And honestly, some of them are epic. I reckon next time around, though, guys, we want more like... Detail? I have a confession, but I cannot say. I'll tell you all fair.
Nikki Westcott 2:03
What is it?
Lucy Jackson 2:05
What have you done?

What are the consequences of lying about past relationships?

Lucy Jackson 2:06
I have a confession.
Nikki Westcott 2:08
All right, we gotta go because I need to hear this.
Lucy Jackson 2:09
Bye. Let's get into this episode. Confessions. These are my confessions.
Nikki Westcott 2:16
What does he say then? What is that lyric?
Lucy Jackson 2:21
Just when you thought I said everything you know.
Nikki Westcott 2:24
Okay, let's start off this episode before we get into... What did you think about Usher in Rollerblades?
Lucy Jackson 2:32
Usher in Rollerblades. Not a fan. Like, why would you have to go rolling like that? And I know you wouldn't. I know you.

How do Lucy and Nikki navigate awkward moments in dating?

Lucy Jackson 2:40
I know you. You. You should see the dance. You. Just kiss the snake. You're the kind of person. I reckon you've done some embarrassing shit and you wouldn't even tell me. Yeah, 100%.
Nikki Westcott 2:53
Tell me. I'm definitely not telling you. You've got the biggest mouth on the Gold Coast. Tell me now. I can't think of anything off the top of my head. We did this exact same thing last time.
Lucy Jackson 3:00
Did we?

What funny stories do they recount about their dating lives?

Nikki Westcott 3:01
I nearly shit myself on the way home from Anna's once. But I pulled over at the toilets at Shugan.
Lucy Jackson 3:05
Well, thank God. No, like embarrassing. Like have you ever sent someone like a really embarrassing text and then been like, fuck up. That was embarrassing. That's my thing.
Nikki Westcott 3:14
Not really, babe. But I think I haven't been in the lens to do that. Do you know what I mean?
Lucy Jackson 3:21
Yeah.
Nikki Westcott 3:21
Because I haven't had like heaps of time being single with boys and stuff. And like you could argue things I have sent to Ollie probably have been embarrassing. But because he's my partner, it's just so diluted. Right?

What advice do Lucy and Nikki give about handling breakups?

Nikki Westcott 3:33
Yeah. Yeah. Right? I know. I miss that.
Lucy Jackson 3:37
I miss that so much.
Nikki Westcott 3:38
Like he's probably like fucking shut up.
Lucy Jackson 3:40
You know what I mean? I miss just blowing up at someone and waking up the next morning next to them and being like, who gives a fuck?
Nikki Westcott 3:47
Yeah, I wouldn't even remember. I'd be like, oh yeah, whatever.
Lucy Jackson 3:49
What about that night when we're like 21 when I ripped my boyfriend's shirt in the pub at a 21st? Do you remember that?
Nikki Westcott 3:55
Yeah, he also threw a glass of water on your face.
Lucy Jackson 3:57
That was a different night. But yeah, it was very chipper-tired. But, like, I just had the head noise. I barely had head noise then.
Nikki Westcott 4:05
Oh, yeah.
Lucy Jackson 4:06
Now I, like, spell something wrong and I wake up like, ah.
Nikki Westcott 4:09
I know, which is funny because you think as you get older, like, you have unnecessary... Head noise.

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