Is email the worst way to break up with someone?
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What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
On the latest episode of Real Health with me, Carl Henry, we're chatting all things back pain, posture, and lots more with physio Mike Murphy.
There's definitely a bad posture to be stuck in all day. There's definitely positions that'll put pressure on my neck or other joints. You know, we like to think of our head, your head's about five kilos, and that's about a bowling ball. Okay, so if you imagine I have this bowling ball and I'm leaned forward, you know, 10 hours a day at the desk, you know, five, six days a week for 10 years, that's going to add up to a fair amount of strain or demand on my neck muscles.
As ever, it's available on all podcast platforms.
This is an Irish independent production.
My wife and I are in couples therapy with a lovely therapist. Took us a long, long, long time to find someone. We had some terrible ones. That's just as hard as finding the right partner, to be honest.
There is no good way to be dumped, but an email after five years has to be up there. For comedian Rosie Wilby, that ending led to a decade investigating why relationships end, what they leave behind and how we learn to stay. So can a breakup actually be good for you? Well, I'm Jennifer Zamparelli and this is Just Between Us. But first, Darren is here. Okay, we need to rank them in order, okay? Emails, text, fax machine. No, we don't do faxes anymore.
Why social
media ghosting? What is the worst?
Ooh, I feel like ghosting is a bad one because you just, you don't know. You know, at least with the facts, you're like, the facts are in the facts.
And you're
in the
1980s. But ghosting is, I find so cruel because in your head, if you've been ghosted, I mean, that person could be dead. Something could have happened. Like, you just
don't
know.
Yeah, and that must be it if they're not contacting me back. Absolutely. I mean, really? They're dead.
Something horrendous has happened. So ghosting is definitely really bad. How do you feel about an email if you got an email?
I feel like an email is more efficient than a text. You know, you have to put more thought into an email like, you know, the greeting, middle, kind regards. Text is a bit too casual. Too flippant. Yeah.
Okay. I broke up with Lau via text. Did you?
I did.
Were you together long though? Five years.
Wow. But it all worked out well. He appreciated the
text. It got to a point, we were together for a long time.
Why is being dumped by email considered one of the worst breakup methods?
It was kind of make or break. He was supposed to move over to Ireland from London. He was over there as an actor and he'd just finished acting college and then said to me when I was like, oh my God, it's time, you're going to move on. He said, I'm going to move on. I'm going to stay another couple of years. I think London is the place I should be. Wow.
And
in anger and disappointment and everything, I sent the text saying, I mean, we had a long distance thing anyway, so it was going to be by phone. Yeah. Or by text. Yeah. And do you, would you change the
way you did it now? No, it
felt great after. Yeah.
No
sending it. Good. Really annoyed him. He got really angry. Thought about it for a while and we broke up for a couple of weeks and then we were back together. It was very spiteful on my part and it wasn't fair on him, really. But it worked.
Yeah, better than ghosting. At least he knew what the crack was. I mean, fair enough. Yeah, I
do think if I was to do it now, it would be very different if I was going to break up with someone
now.
Yeah, well, we have children now, you know, we'd have to sit down and work that out and I'd have to buy him that little apartment and I'd keep the house. But I do think it's, the decent thing to do is to sit down with someone
How do ghosting, texting, and emailing differ as ways to end a relationship?
And say it. Yeah, I think it depends, though, how long you're with them as well. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, because now I think ghosting is never a good idea. But I was in a situation where it was a first date, but I kind of knew that I wasn't going to see him again. And generally, I find it hard to verbalize what I want to say. And would sometimes I have I have ghosted before. Have
you?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Because I just was like, I can't.
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Chapters
4 chapters
1
What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
0:00–2:28
2
Why is being dumped by email considered one of the worst breakup methods?
2:28–3:43
3
How do ghosting, texting, and emailing differ as ways to end a relationship?
3:43–5:51
4
What was Rosie Wilby’s personal experience breaking up via text after five years?
5:51–40:17