KILL TONY #11

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KILL TONY 1h 39m 5 speakers 8 chapters transcribed 3 months ago
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What events are mentioned at the beginning of the podcast?

Brian Redban 0:00
Hey, this is Red Band, and you're listening to Kill Tony here at Death Squad. Please check out me and Tony in Phoenix, Arizona, September 26th. It's a Thursday at Stand Up Live. You can go to StandUpLive.com or go to DeathSquad.tv.
Tony Hinchcliffe 0:14
This is our first time going to Phoenix as Death Squad, and we'd love for you guys to come out so we can prove to this comedy show that we can bring Death Squad there all the time with a bunch of new comics.
Brian Redban 0:24
Also, the following day, Friday, September 27th, me and Tony are flying to Ohio, and we'll be doing a show at the Woodlands Tavern, and that's going to be with Tom Segura and Christina Pijitski of Your Mom's House. So it's going to be a huge super show of four comics. It's going to be awesome. You can go to DeathSquad.tv for all the ticket links, including this Kill Tony, which is every Monday at 8 p.m. at the Comedy Store. It's free, and it's followed by the Ding Dong Show, which is also free at 10 p.m. Also, check out the ShopSquad.tv website. That's where Death Squad sells our Kitty Kat t-shirt. It's limited edition. Again, that's ShopSquad.tv. And now, here's a brand new episode of Kill Tony.
Brian Redban 1:16
Hey, this is Red Band coming to you live from the Comedy Store. How are you guys doing tonight? This is a brand new episode of Kill Tony. Give it up for Tony Hinchcliffe.
Tony Hinchcliffe 1:35
Boom. Here we are. Welcome, everybody. How are you?

What kind of comedy shows are planned in Phoenix and Ohio?

Tony Hinchcliffe 1:40
It's another big pack crowd tonight. Josh Martin's here. How are you, buddy?
Brian Redban 1:46
Great. I'm doing good. We were just talking before, like, what happened this week, and we really can't recall this week.
Tony Hinchcliffe 1:53
It's just a very normal weekend, you know? We just did a bunch of spots, podcasted. You know, we just did what we do.
Brian Redban 2:02
normal stuff, drank too much, cried at the comedy. I guess I cried at the comedy. One of those nights where I did a podcast called Dysentery, and it's pretty much where we just get really, really wasted throughout the podcast, me and a couple girls. I'm talking like a whole bottle of tequila, a couple beers, shots of, it's just a horrible mess. And somehow I ended up here, and I guess I was crying. People are coming up to me telling these stories of shit I said. I guess I was going up to girls that I know, that I would never do this with, and just whispering in their ears going, let's go to San Francisco and fuck.
Tony Hinchcliffe 2:39
That's the craziest pickup line I've ever heard in my life. Why San Francisco? I know. That makes no sense at all.
Brian Redban 2:45
I don't understand.
Tony Hinchcliffe 2:46
That's really weird. What does that mean? Is that some kind of term? Like, hey, baby, let's go to San Francisco. I don't know what that means. That makes no sense at all. It seems like some kind of dirty sexual maneuver.
Brian Redban 2:59
Right. I just wonder if I made a joke up earlier and I thought everyone heard it and I forgot and that's why I was saying that. Right. Because that makes no sense. But I'm so embarrassed. It's one of those nights that you're like, shit, I'm not going to drink tomorrow.
Tony Hinchcliffe 3:12
That's one of those nights where you do that and you the next day are like, what the fuck?
Brian Redban 3:18
Yeah. Yeah, it sucks.
Tony Hinchcliffe 3:20
I've never had people come up to me and tell me that I was crying to them.
Brian Redban 3:24
Yeah, I cry a lot, man. I have this thing where I get really wasted. I just start crying. And it's not like I'm crying. My eyes just start crying.
Tony Hinchcliffe 3:32
Really?
Brian Redban 3:32
Yeah, it's like the alcohol is like, hey, you need to pee. I'm just going to come out of your eyes. Because they're too drunk to realize it. I don't know what the fuck I'm talking about.
Tony Hinchcliffe 3:41
Yeah, that doesn't happen to me. I'll like talk shit and like be crazy when I'm drunk, but the crying thing, I save that for just like, I just keep it all pent up and then I let it turn into anger. Isn't that fun? Do you cry ever? Like once a year? I really don't. You want to know what? I almost cried last night at the new episode of Breaking Bad because that show is un-fucking-believable and it just came back last night. How many people saw that episode of television?
Woo!
Tony Hinchcliffe 4:10
How the fuck are they doing that? That's unbelievable. For those of you that haven't seen that show, I know it must be annoying. People must tell you, hey, go see that show.

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