Marcus In The Morning "ON DEMAND"

Home Depot Sandy

09 Nov 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Sandy is ready to start her career as a contractor. Plus, Jason considers canceling Christmas for this children, and how much less a wedding costs the...

Standard Darkness & Depression

08 Nov 2021

Contributed by Lukas

This time change is really hitting some of the members of the morning show hard. Plus, Marcus wants to royally screw over his wife this holiday season...

Krampus Is Coming

05 Nov 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Is a scary demon who terrorizes children a good Christmas decoration? Plus, is Sandy being flirted with or not?

Thanksgiving Crabby

04 Nov 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Marcus is still out here promoting the non traditional Thanksgiving meals and apparently everyone agrees with him. Plus, GoFundMe for dental work? ......

"Prepare" For Fall Back? Pfft...

03 Nov 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Why do we have to prepare to get an extra hour of sleep? Lame. Also, the perfect temperature for the office seems too hot to do anything except nap, a...

Yea, That's Great For My Health But Screw That!

02 Nov 2021

Contributed by Lukas

I'm taking a burning hot shower every morning whether it's healthy or not. Plus, Jason doubts his parenting skills, and everyone except Marcus wants t...

Cheapin Out On Halloween

01 Nov 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Sandy is upset she thinks her Dad cheaped out on Halloween. Marcus' Halloween was like a Chico frat party, and why are airplane announcements so corny...

Halloween Candy = Gainz

29 Oct 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Halloween candy is now a key part of your fitness routine. You're welcome! Plus, more Bay Area ghost stories, and deleting your social media can help ...

The Haunting Of Vallejo

28 Oct 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Most haunted places in the Bay? What about LIVING with two ghosts? NOPE! Plus, the joys of living in an airport for 3 months.

Full Size Bars For The Win!

26 Oct 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Sandy's father continues to buy 40 full size candy bars for Halloween even though they had not had trick or treaters in years. Plus, Jason's in-laws r...

Sandy Touched By A Ghost

25 Oct 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Sandy finally had the paranormal experience she's been dreaming of! Plus, bomb cyclone 2021, and Dad's don't dare leave the house without looking 100%...

Sandy The Sugar Mama?

21 Oct 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Could Sandy do it? Would YOU? For 15K a month... uhh, yea. Plus, horror movies ruining our lives for 50 years, and how to deal with your insane neighb...

In Law Next Door

20 Oct 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Producer Jason's in-laws want to move next door... good idea or nah? Plus, a father wants to scare the crap out of his kids because, why?

"What's Your Favorite Scary Movie?"

19 Oct 2021

Contributed by Lukas

What's the movie you refuse to watch cause it's way too scary? ...and why is producer Jason way too into this stuff? Plus, 100 snakes in a Sonoma Coun...

It's Not Me, It's My DNA

18 Oct 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Guys, great news! You have another excuse for not losing weight! Plus, Sandy has a scary time in Hollywood, but it's not because she met a ghost.

13 For The Win

15 Oct 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Here's a "sure fire" hack to have the entire row on an airplane all to yourself. Plus, Marcus misses human contact, everyone apparently loves work mee...

70 Year Old's Road Trip

14 Oct 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Road tripping to recapture energy from 40 years ago... good idea or nah? Plus, a wedding ruined by Southwest, and HAPPY BIRTHDAY MARCUS!

Bad For My Teeth and I Love It

13 Oct 2021

Contributed by Lukas

The Halloween candy that will totally wreck your teeth this year. Plus, how to broadcast yourself in the shower on IG Live, and what our old high scho...

Undies: To Wash, Or Not To Wash

12 Oct 2021

Contributed by Lukas

How high is the danger in brand new underwear? Plus, do you number 2 in front of your partner?

Tawdry Wedding Hashtags

08 Oct 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Wedding hashtags... cool or nah? Wait, what's a hashtag again? Plus, Sandy trying to gear up for a ghost hunter adventure, and Marcus ditches his dad ...

Too Scared To Be A Ghost Hunter

07 Oct 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Sandy wants to be a paranormal researcher so bad! One problem: she's way too scared. Plus, what the heck how are candy corn and twizzlers on this list...

Buying The Exorcist House Ain't So Bad

06 Oct 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Would you buy a house if you knew an exorcism took place inside? What if it was a great price? Plus, Marcus is so very excited about his holiday trave...

Guess This Means I Have To Work Now...

05 Oct 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Facebook and Instagram down? Guess I have to actually do some work. Plus, Marcus' food pics are making him fat?

I Don't Have The Life Skills For Life

30 Sep 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Many teens don't know how to make the bed or do laundry... but does Sandy? Plus, Marcus teaches his Dad about BDSM?

All This Free Time Is Bad For My Health

29 Sep 2021

Contributed by Lukas

If you have more than this much free time, you are probably incredibly unhappy. WTF? Plus, go big for Halloween or go home.

Sandy In An Open Marriage?

28 Sep 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Could she do it? Plus, the very first PSL, and how to be a YouTube star.

Big Feet - More Likely To Cheat!

27 Sep 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Ladies, if your man wears a size 10, better watch out! Plus, Sandy partied it up in Palm Springs this past weekend, and Marcus cleans up nice.

Serial Killers For Halloween

24 Sep 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Producer Jason once again wants to dress up his kids like murderers. Cute, or too creepy? Plus, pro tips on how (not) to break up with your stylist.

My Baby Is Going To Be A Libra!??

23 Sep 2021

Contributed by Lukas

People are planning the conception of their baby around Zodiac signs and honestly we have never heard anything more stupid. Plus, don't ever comment o...

I'm Not Depressed I'm Just Bored!!!

22 Sep 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Apple wants to creep on us even more and quite frankly I'm not comfortable with them knowing how bored I am everyday lying on my couch in the dark. Pl...

Fat But Fit

21 Sep 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Great news! You can eat whatever you want and still be fit. Plus, who get the armrests when you sit in the middle seat on an airplane is finally answe...

Boring Music For A Better Drive

20 Sep 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Don't listen to basically every kind of music while driving... it could kill you! Plus, the best worst way to quit a job, and Jason's kid free anniver...

Take Years Off Your Life Like A Pro

16 Sep 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Three things you did last night are killing you! Plus, Marcus wants to be taken seriously as a Mexican, and things single people should know about mar...

Mercury In Retrograde Incoming! Hide!

15 Sep 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Mercury in retrograde starts soon, prepare to hide in a bunker! Plus, Sandy is forced to say hi to her neighbor, with surprising results.

35 Is Middle Aged?!

14 Sep 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Middle aged at 35? Nope, not cool. Plus, Ed Sheeran is on the phone, avoiding the airplane seat next to a baby, and all the ways we misread that innoc...

Sweet, Another Excuse To Be Lazy!

13 Sep 2021

Contributed by Lukas

You don't need 10K steps anymore! Plus, Sandy hears about some savage revenge, and Marcus can't eat all morning nor can he find anyone to give him a r...

Hidden Camera Freak Out

10 Sep 2021

Contributed by Lukas

That's it! I'm never leaving the house again! Plus, Marcus would love to wear PJ's and Ugg boots to Starbucks, and Sandy is right to be still recoveri...

Get Me Out Of This Meeting!

09 Sep 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Is having a family the only easy excuse for getting out of a work meeting? Sandy needs options! Plus, how to talk to a neighbor when you have no idea ...

Thanks For The Invite

07 Sep 2021

Contributed by Lukas

This one comment will never not be annoying!!! Plus, Sandy stars in a romantic comedy in Vegas, Marcus gardens and grosses out at the same time, and k...

The Scientific Way To Flirt

03 Sep 2021

Contributed by Lukas

You have been sliding into DM's all wrong. We'll teach you how! Plus, the games married people play, and why we are not ready to let summer go just ye...

Two Minutes of Torture

02 Sep 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Want to avoid eating sweets and junk food? Just smell it! Plus, Marcus breaks up with his gardener, and Jason thinks his wife his testing him.

Receding Hair Line Vs. Male Pattern Baldness

01 Sep 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Are bald dudes sexy? What about "balding" dudes? Plus, another horrifying "I didn't know I was pregnant" story has Sandy freaked out.

Peppermint In The Summer?

31 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Pumpkin spice at Christmas? Peppermint in July? No! Plus, the best pro tip to take a nap at work.

"hey there..."

30 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

This is the single worst text message you could send someone. Avoid at all costs. Plus, how to avoid small talk with your neighbors, and how to fight ...

I'm Against Office Gossip But OMG Tell Me Everything

27 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Do you gossip at the office? Sandy and Jason think its key to bonding with your coworkers. Plus, how to dumpster dive like a pro, and then take a powe...

Tik Tok Bad Moms

26 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Is this mom just stunting for Tik Tok, or she really this terrible? Plus, Marcus shamed at the pool, and Sandy goes ham on a lamb... burger.

Congrats On The... Pregnancy?

25 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

This is the social disaster we all have nightmares about. Plus, the science behind why hooking up with a ex is so easy, and keeps happening.

No Alcohol - No Deal

23 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Airlines banning alcohol? How will Marcus ever fly again? Plus, eating that hot dog for dinner tonight is taking minutes off your life.

How To Be A Creeper

20 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Is there any possible way to take a photo of someone without them knowing, and not looking like a creepy weirdo? Also, single guys over 50... damaged ...

It's Go Time For Halloween

19 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

When is it OK to put out Halloween decorations? Producer Jason has the answer drilled down to a science. Plus, grossest thing you have ever seen a co-...

You Better Text Me First

18 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Gen Z is bringing back the phone call! Marcus is thrilled! Plus, our drinking increased how much last year? ...and I dream about being a hero, but I d...

The Light Therapy Mask I Never Needed

17 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

How much money have you wasted on crap you bought online that you never used? No matter your answer, you can't beat Sandy she is the queen of buying j...

Baristas Are Over You And Your Complicated Drink

16 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Really? I thought my barista loved me? Also, Sandy forgot how old she was over the weekend, and was horrified when she found out. Plus, Sundays are ve...

Get Me Out Of This Conversation!

13 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Pro tips on how to get out of a conversation with that co-worker you want nothing to do with. Plus, how your insane drunk uncle made your wedding weir...

Accidental Exercise

12 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

My cardio isn't an accident, it's purposely integrated into my daily life, ok!? Plus, do you really want to live in Stockton? ...and the things that b...

Gyms, Blockbuster Style

11 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Are gyms dead? Sandy hopes not, but Marcus could do with a few less guys using the locker room to blow dry... everything. Plus, Marcus "let it slip" a...

Cameras In My House?! OK, Maybe, If I Get More Vaca Time

10 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Sandy is horrified there is a company that wants to put cameras in the homes of their work from home employees. Nightmare! ...but what if you got more...

3 - 4 Minutes Is All I Need?

09 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

"Experts" say you only really need 3 to 4 minutes in the shower. Pfft, I'm going to need a lot longer than that to ponder my life choices. Plus, Marcu...

Don't Call Her A Hermit

06 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Sandy dreams of living alone in the desert... just call her a goddess, not a hermit. Plus, Marcus is behaving badly in front of his therapist.

Recline Drama

04 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

To recline, or not to recline... that is the question. Sandy is SO pissed if you recline in front of her on a flight... Marcus can't recline soon enou...

...Just Don't Want To Be Around You

03 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

What is it about ourselves that makes people just not want to be around us. Deep soul searching time! Plus, Marcus is all about food pics, but you bet...

Camping Fail = Hospital & Bruised Ego

02 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Marcus tried to camp this weekend but hurt himself badly about one hour in. Plus, your most random and funny celeb sightings, and Sandy is thinking ab...

I Can See Everything

30 Jul 2021

Contributed by Lukas

What if you were taking a shower and your neighbor could see... everything. I mean, opening to get a date with the hot guy across the street? Plus, yo...

Zoom In -- Catch Cheaters

29 Jul 2021

Contributed by Lukas

If you think your boyfriend is cheating, you need to perfect the art of the zoom in. Plus, Marcus plans an epic taco night, only to get a soul crushin...

Short Term Rentals For Your Pool? Creepy!

28 Jul 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Want to rent someone's pool? Sounds cool, until the homeowner wants to kick it with you. Plus, I've been using Doritos all wrong, and Marcus doubles d...

Cheater!

27 Jul 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Ladies, a married man is trying to get with you... do you tell his wife? Plus, Marcus wouldn't wash himself, or anything, if it wasn't for his wife.

I Need A Magazine, Cheetos, Bottle Of Water...

26 Jul 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Do you get embarrassed about buying certain things at the store? Marcus DGAF. Plus, is a device free dinner even possible?

SF, San Fran, Frisco?

23 Jul 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Which nickname for San Francisco is the most offensive? Plus, Sandy ate way more junk food than we previously thoughts on her east coast trip a few we...

A Wife's Guide To Being A Husband

22 Jul 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Can your husband not remember a damn thing about you even though you have been married for 20 years? This new product may help! Plus, Sandy knows how ...

My Brother Is So Lazy That...

21 Jul 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Who is the laziest person in your family, and what are they not doing that drives you nuts? Plus, Jeff Bezos: Space Cowboy, and the great hot dog cond...

I'm Not Moving Off This Throne For Anything

20 Jul 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Marcus will do the basic household duties, as long as you make it super simple for him. Plus, Sandy is ready to work alllll day as long she gets an ex...

Pantless At The Party

19 Jul 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Sandy went to party this weekend that came with a disclaimer: Beware of the naked guy. Plus, do you love the drama of reading about break ups online? ...

How To Online Stalk Someone

16 Jul 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Sandy has a friend who is the master of online stalking... wait, let's call it "research". Plus, the list of things that officially mean you are old. ...

Helpful Tips To Not Exercise

15 Jul 2021

Contributed by Lukas

The top excuses to avoid working out? Sure, we just used 3 of these yesterday... and probably will again today! Plus, in search of 3 foot tall bigfoot...

Doritos & Red Wine Meal Plan

14 Jul 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Marcus has a very unique approach to his new "diet". Plus, kids please don't put household bleach on your teeth? OK?

I'm Married To A Robot

13 Jul 2021

Contributed by Lukas

The time will come soon where we can order our robot bride online. Great idea or nah? Plus, is THIS hairstyle for old ladies only?

Jersey Shore & The Livin Is Easy

12 Jul 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Sandy is back from the Jersey Shore were she had the best time of her life. "Legendary" doesn't begin to describe it. Plus, Marcus has an 80's vaca, a...

Road Trippin & Tantrums

09 Jul 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Marcus the parenting pro tip givin, road trippin super dad. Plus, drink wine, love long, but do mixed drinks count as well?

Make A Man Chase You

29 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

We've got the pro tips to make him fall in love! OMG this is so stupid. Plus, how to get paid for 15 years by doing nothing.

I Can't Eat That

28 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Marcus and Sandy both have a message for the kids... don't eat that. Plus, Marcus has great power with his new handicap sign, but he also has great re...

I Need A Vacation From My Vacation Prep

25 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Preparing for a vacation can be stressful! Well, for some people at least. Sandy is stressed, but Marcus is chill as hell. Plus, Marcus is prepared t...

I Can't Date A Dolphin

24 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

A new Netflix show has us asking ourselves... would I rather date a sexy alien, or a dolphin? Plus, Sandy is going to make an afternoon charcuterie bo...

Marcus Will Live Forever

23 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

One of the secrets to a long life? Marcus has been doing this every night for years! Plus, how do you spell that?? ...and how to avoid burn out.

I Wanna Be A Billionaire

22 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

What you would you do if you tried to withdraw 20 bucks at the ATM and found out you were a billionaire? Plus, what food should you avoid on a first d...

Your Love Doesn't Cost A Thing, But Also $200 Please

18 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Father's Day coming in hot and you don't need to spend any money on Dad... unless your Dad is Marcus. Plus, inviting 300 people to your wedding is on ...

JUST. STOP. TALKING.

17 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

How do you deal with someone who just won't stop talking? Sandy needs pro tips to deal with her neighbor who won't let her walk through her front door...

My Name Is Not Mark...

16 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Someone has been calling you the wrong name for over a year... do you correct them? Plus, team wife or team stupid husband in the battle of Bed Bath &...

Peloton Shamed In The Desert

15 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Marcus is trying to relax in Palm Springs but all his friends want to do is rise and grind. Plus, things you can do to piss off your server, and reply...

Poolside All Day (Melting)

14 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Marcus is currently melting in Palm Springs. This is a vacation?? Plus, Sandy has not slept, and to boot her car was broken into by a lazy criminal th...

"You Made The Cut"

11 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

I can't stand people that announce "social media house cleaning"! Plus, Marcus in Palm Springs where its 300 degrees, and is a vacation with kids and ...

I'll Wear These Undies 10 Times

10 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

A guy on Twitter thinks that every guy wears their underwear 3-10 times before washing them? Bro, you need help. Plus, Marcus dumps his Dad!?

Do I Really Need To Shower Everyday?

09 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Marcus loves to push the limits of showering. I feel bad for his family... those odors. Plus, what TV are you embarrassed you love so much?

Spiders vs Roaches

08 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Which insect freaks you out more... Spiders or cockroaches? Marcus will bare knuckle box a spider but cockroaches are scary. Plus, Marcus is such a ba...

Father's Day Gift Registry? Really?

07 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Marcus know what he wants for Father's Day, and it's a lot nicer than what he got his wife for Mother's Day. Woops. Plus, Sandy is back in office, but...

Sorry, Can't, Mercury In Retrograde

04 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Mercury is in retrograde so that's my excuse for everything wrong right now. Plus, 9 year olds can drive cross country now???

Vegas Spending

03 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Things that cost $40 at Trader Joe's cost $300 in Vegas, but Sandy is willing to do what it takes to party big. Plus, Marcus is the king of excuses an...

Toilet Phone Me Time

02 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Do you use your phone in the bathroom? I bet you don't use it like Marcus does though! Plus, we will go to extreme lengths to eat as much cake as we c...

Sandy In Vegas!

01 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Sandy was in Vegas over the three day weekend, but she almost didn't make it there on Friday! Plus, Marcus is going back to school, but it's not becau...

Sandy On The Border

24 May 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Sandy left the country this weekend, and she almost didn't make it back in! Plus, why do airplanes make normal people rude as all hell??

Friday Is The Best Day - Duh...

21 May 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Someone got paid to tell us that Friday is the best day to take a mental health day. Wow. Plus, use these vocab words to pretend you are smart.