Multiamory: Rethinking Modern Relationships

186 - Reconnecting When You Don't Want To

28 Aug 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Have you ever tensed up when a partner tried to hug you after a fight? What about feeling weird when a partner comes home from a date with someone els...

185 - Can Men Get Along with their Metamours?

21 Aug 2018

Contributed by Lukas

On this episode we speak with Dr. Alex Bove about the findings of his recently published research on metamours and masculinity, titled: "Meta, More or...

184 - Multiamory Answers Your Questions Vol. 3 (Live from Lake Tahoe)

14 Aug 2018

Contributed by Lukas

This week we're coming at ya live from our first ever patreon retreat in Lake Tahoe, CA! We answer questions from our Patreon supporters, discussing h...

183 - Equal and Equitable Relationships

07 Aug 2018

Contributed by Lukas

What does it mean to have a relationship that feels "equal"? Is it a fair division of labor? Mutual trust and respect? Treating every partner exactly ...

182 - Gamify Your Life

31 Jul 2018

Contributed by Lukas

If you've listened to this podcast for a while, you're aware that the Multiamory crew are a bunch of gaming nerds. This week, we dive into the princip...

181 - Settler Sexuality (with Dr. Kim Tallbear)

24 Jul 2018

Contributed by Lukas

We're extra excited to speak to Professor Kim Tallbear. Dr. Tallbear is the author of The Critical Polyamorist blog, as well as several books, article...

180 - The Mono/Poly Paradox

17 Jul 2018

Contributed by Lukas

It's a questions we've gotten since starting the podcast -- can mono/poly relationships work? We're joined by Phoebe Phillips, author of the Polyammer...

179 - Anxiety and Relationships

10 Jul 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Anxiety can rear its head in the form of some weird gut feelings or nervousness, or it can be a full blown panic attack. This week we talk about the f...

178 - The Basics of Boundaries

03 Jul 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Let's look at the fundamentals of boundaries. Boundaries are one of the most powerful and important tools for having healthy relationships, but it’s...

177 - This is Your Brain on Love

26 Jun 2018

Contributed by Lukas

This is your brain. And this is your brain on love. We’re talking about your brain on relationships -- how the different parts of your brain affect ...

176 - Christianity and Polyamory

19 Jun 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Peace be with you! This week we're sitting down with Rev. Austin Adkinson and theologian J.D. Mechelke to dive into the tricky topic of polyamory and ...

175 - Adventures in Online Arguments

12 Jun 2018

Contributed by Lukas

The Internet: making you get in fights with strangers since the 90s! This week we dive into online arguments: how they happen, how to avoid them, and ...

174 - Numerous Non-Binary Identities (with therapist Dara Hoffman-Fox)

05 Jun 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Author and gender therapist Dara Hoffman-Fox joins us once again to talk about gender, identity, and the full spectrum that lies outside the tradition...

173 - Transitioning Relationships

29 May 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Can you stay close with an ex after a breakup? Multiamory proves that it is possible! In this episode, Jase and Emily explore the subtle nuances of tr...

172 - Polyamory in Movies and TV (Live Show)

22 May 2018

Contributed by Lukas

In this live show episode from our 2018 tour, we're surveying how pop culture has treated polyamory and other non-monogamous relationships in the past...

171 - Polyamory, Family, and Children (with Dr. Eli Sheff)

15 May 2018

Contributed by Lukas

We're pleased to have Dr. Eli Sheff back on the show to talk about her 15+ years of research into polyamorous families with children. Sheff shares the...

170 - Taking for Your Pleasure (with Melissa Mango and Cosmo Meens)

08 May 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Multiamory made some new friends at RelateCon! We sit down with Cosmo Meens and Melissa Mango to discuss their work in consent, pleasure-based touchin...

169 - Unapolygetic

01 May 2018

Contributed by Lukas

This week we’re talking about how to be open, honest, and unafraid when talking to other people about your relationships, whether they are someone y...

168 - Communication Hacks: Booster Pack

24 Apr 2018

Contributed by Lukas

We’re opening our Communication Hacks: Booster Pack! The Multiamory crew walks each other through a communication tip that we recently discovered an...

167 - Polyamory and the Law

17 Apr 2018

Contributed by Lukas

On this episode of the Multiamory podcast we’re at the first annual Southwest Love Fest in Tucson, Arizona speaking with lawyer Jonathan Lane, who s...

166 - Impromptu Bible Study

10 Apr 2018

Contributed by Lukas

What's the Bible have to say about polyamory? Spoiler alert: it mostly has things to say about questionable polygamy. Join us for an impromptu study o...

165 - Polyamory Finishing School

03 Apr 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Pinky out! We’re going to polyamory finishing school! Connecting with a polyamorous community is an important first step on someone’s journey so w...

164 - The Relationship Escalator & Solo Polyamory (with author Amy Gahran

27 Mar 2018

Contributed by Lukas

We get to pick the brain of Amy Gahran a.k.a. Aggie Sez about her book, Stepping Off the Relationship Escalator. We explore the social norms for how m...

163 - Inspiring Relationships - Part 2

20 Mar 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Can you think of any relationships that inspire you? Perplexed by this question, the Multiamory crew investigates what truly makes for healthy, stable...

162 - Inspiring Relationships - Part 1

13 Mar 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Can you think of any relationships that inspire you? Perplexed by this question, the Multiamory crew investigates what truly makes for healthy, stable...

161 - Love is Not Colorblind with Kevin Patterson

06 Mar 2018

Contributed by Lukas

This week we're talking with Kevin Patterson, creator of the Poly Role Models blog and author of the upcoming book Love Is Not Colorblind: Race and Re...

160 - Find Your Biases, Have Better Relationships

27 Feb 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Get ready to question reality! This week we cover the fundamentals of biased thinking, some common ways that it can show up in your relationships, and...

159 - The Triforce of Communication: DLC Expansion Pack

20 Feb 2018

Contributed by Lukas

The Triforce of Communication is back! This is yet another one of our favorite communication tools, and this week we're revisiting it with much more k...

158 - Beyond Blue and Pink

13 Feb 2018

Contributed by Lukas

The Multiamory crew loves talking about gender, so we' were both excited and intimidated by tackling such a broad topic this week. Gender identity and...

157 - Disability After Dark with Andrew Gurza

06 Feb 2018

Contributed by Lukas

This week we had the pleasure of talking to “Disability After Dark” podcast host Andrew Gurza! Andrew gave us an amazingly funny and candid interv...

156 - How To Get Over Your Ex

30 Jan 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Break-ups may sting, but it’s the healing process afterwards that can truly hurt for a long time. It’s especially difficult if you find yourself s...

155 - How to Build Trust in a Relationship

23 Jan 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Trust in a relationship -- easy to lose, difficult to regain. If there's been a major breach of trust in your relationship, is there any hope that it ...

154 - Getting Real about Sexual Health

16 Jan 2018

Contributed by Lukas

How many people would you need to have unprotected sex with in order to catch an STI? 4? 50? 1000? This week we get real about the language we use aro...

153 - Building Consent Culture (with author Kitty Stryker)

09 Jan 2018

Contributed by Lukas

We are so pleased to be speaking with Kitty Stryker -- feminist writer, queer activist, and author of Ask: Building Consent Culture. In this episode w...

152 - Polyamory: The Most Common Questions

02 Jan 2018

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode, we're getting back to our roots! The Multiamory crew was interviewed about the basics of polyamory and our personal experiences for a...

151 - Conflict Crash Course

26 Dec 2017

Contributed by Lukas

Conflict and disagreements are unavoidable in relationships, but they don't have to cause pain, negativity, or destruction. In this episode we cover a...

150 - Relationship Anarchy 101

19 Dec 2017

Contributed by Lukas

Relationship Anarchy: what is it? Who invented it? Does it mean overthrowing the relationship government? This week we're looking at the original rela...

149 - One is (Not) The Lonliest Number

12 Dec 2017

Contributed by Lukas

This week we're talking about consciously choosing to stay single! Can staying single be just as emotionally valuable as being in a relationship? We h...

148 - Your Narcissistic Ex (Is Probably Not a Narcissist)

05 Dec 2017

Contributed by Lukas

This week we’re talking about your narcissistic ex. To be more specific, we’re talking about narcissism -- the word that seems to come out of ever...

147 - Relationship RADAR: Scrum 2.0

28 Nov 2017

Contributed by Lukas

After a whole year of experimenting with applying agile scrum to relationships, the Multiamory crew is proud to present our new and improved relations...

146 - Fear of Missing Out

21 Nov 2017

Contributed by Lukas

We all know what it feels like to experience FOMO -- fear of missing out. Whether it's scrolling through Facebook and seeing how much more fun everyon...

145 - Why Gratitude Isn't Bullshit (#Blessed)

14 Nov 2017

Contributed by Lukas

We've all heard the saying, "You have to love yourself before you can love someone else." But is that actually true? This week, the Multiamory crew ex...

144 - (Japanese & English Version) Multi-Cultural Dating and Culturally Intelligent Relationships (Live Show in Tokyo)

08 Nov 2017

Contributed by Lukas

The Multiamory crew is in Tokyo! In this very special live episode recorded at Good Heavens British Pub in Setagaya, we discuss how increasing your cu...

144 - Multi-Cultural Dating and Culturally Intelligent Relationships (English-only Version)

07 Nov 2017

Contributed by Lukas

The Multiamory crew is in Tokyo! In this very special live episode recorded at Good Heavens British Pub in Setagaya, we discuss how increasing your cu...

143 - Mindful Sex and Ethical Porn (with author Jessica Graham)

31 Oct 2017

Contributed by Lukas

The Multiamory crew is excited to welcome Jessica Graham, meditation teacher, mindfulness coach, and author of the new book Good Sex: Getting Off With...

142 - Do You Have Healthy Relationship Expectations?

24 Oct 2017

Contributed by Lukas

This week we are talking about expectations -- a force for both good and evil! The expectations we bring to a relationship can have a significant effe...

141 - Solving Sexual Incompatibility

17 Oct 2017

Contributed by Lukas

What can be done if you and your partner have different sexual preferences or vastly different sex drives? What are some alternatives to the mainstrea...

140 - The Jealousy Survival Guide (with author Kitty Chambliss)

10 Oct 2017

Contributed by Lukas

This week we're speaking with Kitty Chambliss, coach, speaker, and author of the soon to be released Jealousy Survival Guide. Kitty shares with us the...

139 - Love is (Not) All You Need

03 Oct 2017

Contributed by Lukas

Multiamory loves The Beatles, but we take issue with the assertion that love is all you need. In this episode, we discuss the dangers of what is tradi...

138 - Conscious Monogamy

26 Sep 2017

Contributed by Lukas

What is conscious monogamy? The term gets thrown around on many polyamory and non-monogamy blogs, but there isn't really a set definition for it. This...

137 - Intersectionality and Polyamorous Communities (with therapist Ruby Bouie Johnson)

19 Sep 2017

Contributed by Lukas

We're very pleased to speak with Ruby Bouie Johnson, sex therapist and founder of PolyDallas Millennium, an annual symposium of presentations and work...

136 - Healing Old Wounds and Resentment in Relationships

12 Sep 2017

Contributed by Lukas

If you find your partner holding the past against you, feeling hurt and upset even after you've apologized for something in the past, or if you find y...

135 - What's Your Apology Language?

05 Sep 2017

Contributed by Lukas

Our favorite God-doctor Gary Chapman, creator of the 5 Love Languages, has come up with another useful tool for communication: the 5 Apology Languages...

134 - Legal Protections for Polyamorous Families (with lawyer Diana Adams)

29 Aug 2017

Contributed by Lukas

The Multiamory crew is thrilled to speak with lawyer Diana Adams, who runs a law firm based in New York and Frankfurt that primarily provides family l...

133 - 6 Questions You Must Ask Your New Partner

22 Aug 2017

Contributed by Lukas

A long list of "glass ceiling questions" has been floating around the polyamorous internet lately. These are questions that are essential to ask a new...

132 - The Ethical Slut 20th Anniversary with Janet Hardy

15 Aug 2017

Contributed by Lukas

The Ethical Slut, long considered to be the "Bible" of polyamory and alternative relationships, is celebrating its 20th anniversary with a new, update...

131 - Dumpster Fire Relationships

08 Aug 2017

Contributed by Lukas

The dumpster fire relationship: you know it when you see it. Constant fights, endless drama, and an umatched level of emotional, mental, and physical ...

130 - Emotional Labor

02 Aug 2017

Contributed by Lukas

This week we're digging in to emotional labor -- the mental and emotional energy required to maintain a relationship. All interpersonal relationships ...

129 - Multiamory Answers Your Questions (Vol. II)

25 Jul 2017

Contributed by Lukas

This week we are talking about...you! That's right, this week the Multiamory crew tackles the questions that our listeners left on the Multiamory voic...

128 - How To Support Your Partner Through a Breakup

18 Jul 2017

Contributed by Lukas

Break ups suck. They suck a little less if you're not the one going through it, but if it's your partner who's just been dumped, then you may find you...

127 - Relationship Agreement Pitfalls

11 Jul 2017

Contributed by Lukas

This week we're discussing agreement pitfalls -- common relationship agreements that seem reasonable, but which may cause trouble in the long run. The...

126 - Building Intimacy with Multiamory

04 Jul 2017

Contributed by Lukas

We are exploring this popular article about questions that will make you fall in love (or build intimacy with someone) by asking each other some of th...

125 - Researching Non-Monogamous Relationships (with researcher Ryan Witherspoon)

27 Jun 2017

Contributed by Lukas

This week the Multiamory crew gets to pick the brain of researcher, educator, and Ph.D candidate Ryan Witherpsoon. Ryan has specialized in studying co...

124 - The Dating Advice Girl Talks Polyamory

20 Jun 2017

Contributed by Lukas

This week we are welcoming special guest Erin Tillman, a.k.a. The Dating Advice Girl. Erin has coached many singles through the process of creating a ...

123 - The Science of Happy Relationships

13 Jun 2017

Contributed by Lukas

Love and science finally hook up. The results? Sexy. This week we're covering all the things that will make your relationships better, backed by scien...

122 - Multiamory Answers Your Questions

06 Jun 2017

Contributed by Lukas

This week we are talking about...you! That's right, this week the Multiamory crew tackles the questions that our listeners left on the Multiamory voic...

121 - Social Media and Relationships

30 May 2017

Contributed by Lukas

This week, we're talking about the effects of social media on your relationships, and some of the unique challenges presented to non-monogamous relati...

120 - 7 Strategies for Successful Long Distance Relationships

23 May 2017

Contributed by Lukas

2/3rds of the Multiamory crew is once again heading off for global adventures, which means it's time to talk about long-distance relationships. In thi...

119 - Asexual Polyamory

16 May 2017

Contributed by Lukas

This week the Multiamory crew is happy to talk with The One True Will, former facilitator of the Gracefully Poly Facebook group. Will has identified a...

118 - Helping Your Partner Open Up

09 May 2017

Contributed by Lukas

Whether you're opening up an existing relationship or beginning a relationship with someone who is new to polyamory, it can be challenging to know the...

117 - Why Do You Want What You Want?

02 May 2017

Contributed by Lukas

This week we are tackling the complicated task of deconstructing desire. In life, we often set our sights on accomplishing a particular goal or attain...

116 - Being Polyamorous in a Monogamous World (Live Show)

25 Apr 2017

Contributed by Lukas

In this very special live show, the Multiamory crew digs into the day-to-day foibles of having non-normative relationships in a hetero-mono-normative ...

115 - Cooper S. Beckett on Swinger Resorts and Sexy Vacations

18 Apr 2017

Contributed by Lukas

Multiamory is happy to have author, podcast host, and pegging enthusiast Cooper S. Beckett back on the show! Cooper came on our show way back in the e...

114 - Privilege and Polyamory

11 Apr 2017

Contributed by Lukas

This week, we are discussing privilege and polyamory -- the different advantages and disadvantages that we often forget about when approaching non-tra...

113 - What is Romantic Love? (with philosopher Carrie Jenkins)

04 Apr 2017

Contributed by Lukas

Multiamory is very excited to sit down with philosopher Carrie Jenkins, author of the newly released book What Love Is and What It Could Be. Carrie ha...

112 - Choking on the Red Pill

28 Mar 2017

Contributed by Lukas

This week, the Multiamory crew tackles a divisive and controversial subject: the Red Pill movement. The Red Pill movement, in our estimation, is equal...

111 - Polyamory-Friendly Counseling

21 Mar 2017

Contributed by Lukas

If you've hit a particularly sticky bump in your relationship, or if you're interested in doing some preventative maintenance and exploration, it is e...

110 - Deconstructing Jealousy

14 Mar 2017

Contributed by Lukas

We talk a lot about jealousy in the polyamory scene -- how to manage it, how to de-program it, how to communicate with your partners about it. But in ...

109 - Ethical Unicorn Hunting (live show)

07 Mar 2017

Contributed by Lukas

Unicorn hunters (heterosexual couples seeking to add a bisexual woman to their relationship) get a bad rap in the polyamorous community. But is it pos...

108 - Solo Polyamory (Live Show)

28 Feb 2017

Contributed by Lukas

Multiamory is in Portland! In this special, live-audience episode, we explore solo polyamory. The solo poly crowd is an often-misunderstood, yet signi...

107 - A Very Polyamorous Valentine's Day (Live Show)

21 Feb 2017

Contributed by Lukas

The Multiamory West Coast tour brought the crew to Seattle on February 14th. On this very traditional romantic holiday, we spent some time discussing ...

106 - 7 Habits of Highly Effective Poly People (Live Show)

14 Feb 2017

Contributed by Lukas

This week's episode was recorded during Multiamory's very first stop on their West Coast Tour 2017! Every seat in the house at Octopus Literary Salon ...

105 - The Smart Girl's Guide to Polyamory

07 Feb 2017

Contributed by Lukas

Our own Dedeker Winston's book, The Smart Girl's Guide to Polyamory comes out internationally today and we are so excited to be able to interview her ...

104 - Polyamory in Movies and TV (Live Show)

31 Jan 2017

Contributed by Lukas

This is a very special live presentation by the Multiamory crew that took place in Santa Monica on January 20th, 2017. In this episode we are discussi...

103 - Relationship Agreements with Eri Kardos

24 Jan 2017

Contributed by Lukas

This week we are very pleased to speak with Eri Kardos, international speaker, coach, and author of the newly released book Relationship Agreements. E...

102 - Emotional Responsibility aka Owning Your Shit

17 Jan 2017

Contributed by Lukas

If you've ever been in a relationship with a human being, chances are you've encountered some emotions within yourself and the other person. Until the...

101 - Gender Non-Conformity 101

10 Jan 2017

Contributed by Lukas

This week on Multiamory, Jase and Emily get all Gender Non-Specific with our special guest, professional cuddliest and dominatrix, Tate Ashley! Tate h...

100 - Relationship Resolutions

03 Jan 2017

Contributed by Lukas

It's Multiamory's 100th episode! It's a new season! It's a new year! And that means....New Year's Resolutions. Download the worksheet here to use in y...

099 - I Got 99 Problems but 2016 Ain't One

27 Dec 2016

Contributed by Lukas

2016 was a challenging year, but the Multiamory crew is tired of all the doom and gloom. In this episode, we review the good parts of 2016. A lot of g...

098 - Happy Holidays Part 2: This Time It's Personal

20 Dec 2016

Contributed by Lukas

The holidays are upon us, and so is the holiday stress! This week we are talking about all the aspects of the holidays that makes us fall into a tempo...

097 - Agile Scrum Your Relationships

13 Dec 2016

Contributed by Lukas

This week we are discussing a unique communication system to try out in your relationships: agile scrum. The agile scrum system was originally develop...

096 - Polyamorous Storytelling and Diversity with Jackie Stone

06 Dec 2016

Contributed by Lukas

This week we are excited to speak with Jackie Stone, director of the poly-themed web series, Compersion. Jackie shares with us her inspiration to tell...

095 - Consent with Sex Nerd Sandra

29 Nov 2016

Contributed by Lukas

This week the Multiamory crew is very excited to intereview sex educator and podcast host for The Nerdist, Sex Nerd Sandra! Sandra takes us through th...

094 - Multiamory has Group Sex with Billy Procida

22 Nov 2016

Contributed by Lukas

This week we welcome very special guest Billy Procida, host of The Manwhore Podcast: A Sex Positive Quest for Love.We dig into all kinds of topics in ...

093 - Being Secondary While Putting Yourself First

15 Nov 2016

Contributed by Lukas

At Multiamory, we generally discourage people from building their relationships on a basis of strict, primary-secondary hierarchy. However, primary-se...

092 - Should You Come Out of the Closet?

08 Nov 2016

Contributed by Lukas

Coming out to partners, family, friends, or co-workers about being polyamorous is an important decision that could potentially change your life and yo...

091 - The Polyamorous Man: Masculinity and Non-Monogamy

02 Nov 2016

Contributed by Lukas

Only 1/3 of the Multiamory crew identifies as male, but social expectations of masculinity have had an influence on all of us. This week we're digging...

090 - Polyamory Processing Groups

25 Oct 2016

Contributed by Lukas

Have you ever felt alone on your poly journey? Do your friends or family immediately jump to blaming polyamory for any relationship problems you may h...

089 - Make Polyamory Great Again

18 Oct 2016

Contributed by Lukas

This week, the Multiamory crew is pissed off. The current political climate has inspired us to vent about a number of topical things that get under ou...

088 - Do You Feel Special?

11 Oct 2016

Contributed by Lukas

Most of us enjoy feeling special, particularly to our romantic partners. In traditional relationships, one's specialness is closely linked to exclusiv...