I Tested 1-Star Restaurants

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Nick DiGiovanni 16 min 1 speaker 6 chapters transcribed

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What are the craziest one-star Yelp reviews?

Host 0:18

In this video, I've collected the craziest one-star Yelp reviews I can find and brought along a few friends to help me put them to the test. Dennis is a health inspector who's going undercover today, and Pete is my brother who loves food just as much as I do. We're starting here at a Chinese restaurant called Pan Asia, where Xander said, I do love Chinese food, as long as it's made by humans. But I must say, the poo-poo platter looked more like a poo-poo platter, like my dog made it, if you know what I mean. He also attached this photo. Who attaches a photo like this to a Yelp review? Yeah, it's not good. While these guys taste the poo-poo platter to see if Xander means business, I've had Ryan Trahan, the king of one-star reviews, help me come up with a few simple rules for this video.

Host 0:56

First, you must leave an honest five-star Yelp review at every restaurant you visit. And second, the restaurant that wows you the most must receive a trophy at the end of the video, because everybody loves trophies. Good luck, Nick. What do we think, guys? It's not so bad visually. Honestly, the chicken's actually charred to perfection and seasoned pretty well. It's quite tender, too. I like the egg roll. Is it crunchy?

How did the health inspector react to the food?

Host 1:16

Mm-hmm. From a health inspector standpoint, the food's all nice and hot. Everything is overcooked, so I would assume it's cooked through. But I really like the chicken, and the fried food is extremely crunchy. The seasoning's good, the crisp is there. I think we have enough to write a review.

What happened at Natalie's Pizza?

Host 1:36

Gotta see what my fortune is. A lifetime of culinary adventures is coming. We've made it to Natalie's Pizza. Ali says, there are only two things that happen when you enter Natalie's. One, you get into a fight. Two, you get food poisoning. That's all. You better have your dukes up when we walk in there. I'm ready. Andrew said, there should be rules concerning how one can make a pizza. This place use canned mushrooms like they just learned how to cook. What an insult to my taste buds. Apparently, Andrew likes fresh mushrooms. As you can see, they don't just serve pizza. They also have hot wieners. And Theo said, I ordered a hot wiener, and it was a Walmart wiener. What's a Walmart wiener? I'm assuming he means they just bought it at Walmart. Yeah, I don't know. This is cool. Hello. Oh, we're just picking up. Thank you. How about here?

Host 2:18

Let's eat some pizza. Wow. It's, like, picture perfect. Looks really good. It gives me almost, like, throwback vibes from, like, the school cafeteria, too. Let's see. Same thing. It's, like, perfectly round. You're going to get in a fight with Dennis hitting him with the box. Here's the fight we're talking about right there. Let's go. It's a great slice. It's hot. It's greasy, but not too greasy. There's nothing dripping off my pizza. I would have liked this cooked a little bit more, but I like the crust. There's plenty of cheese. It doesn't look like any sort of canned sausage, canned pepperoni. This looks like a legit piece of pepperoni right here. It's a damn good pizza. I'm actually going to dive into the wieners. We need to see whether or not they're Walmart winners.

Host 2:53

You know, a hot dog is not supposed to be aesthetically pleasing also, right? I mean, you're not going to open a hot dog and think, wow, that's the most beautiful looking hot dog I've ever seen in my life. It's all about the taste. For me, it's the snap. I like the snap. The snap. I'm actually going to pull out the dog to see if I think it's a Walmart wiener. How would you know? I looked at a photo of the wieners they serve at Walmart. This doesn't look as dark in color as those ones. It is almost a neon orange. So I'm actually gonna go ahead and say I don't think it's a Walmart wiener. We're pretty hot on the pizza. The wieners, it's not great, it's not bad.