2761: Bending Without Breaking: How to Identify Needs and Preferences When Dating by Kara Shade of Gottman

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Recorded12 Oct 2025

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Discover all of the podcasts in our network, search for specific episodes, get the Optimal Living Daily workbook, and learn more at: OLDPodcast.com. Episode 2761: Kara Shade challenges us to distinguish between needs and preferences in dating, revealing how clarity on this distinction can prevent heartbreak and guide us toward stronger, more intentional relationships. Backed by Gottman research and insights from relationship scientists, her piece encourages reflection, flexibility, and honesty, principles that remain just as relevant in long-term partnerships as they are in early dating. Read along with the original article(s) here: https://www.gottman.com/blog/bending-without-breaking-identify-needs-preferences-dating/ Quotes to ponder: "When people show you who they are, believe them." "Being clear and honest about your needs and asking the tough questions are critical functions of that process." "It’s less about what you’re doing and more about how you’re doing it together." Episode references: The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: https://www.amazon.com/Seven-Principles-Making-Marriage-Work/dp/0609805797

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