Pardon My Take
NFL Divisional Round With Kyle Long, Electric Substations With Peter Cowan, Divisional Round Picks & Preview, Harbaugh To The Giants + Fyre Fest
16 Jan 2026
Chapter 1: What is discussed at the start of this section?
Hey Pardon My Take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. On today's Pardon My Take, presented by DraftKings, it is divisional round in the NFL and we're ready to go. We're ready for some football. We're going to talk all four games, Saturday and Sunday. We have our good friend Kyle Long on.
You're going to see him on NFL Today on the big desk on Saturday before the Bills-Broncos game. He's breaking down every game, talking about weather, O-line play, defensive matchups. He's the best. We also have a very interesting interview with Peter Cowan. His tweet went viral last week about the substation next to the 49ers facility. So we get to the bottom of that. How much of that is real?
How much do we have to worry about it? And also a lot of in-and-out talk.
Chapter 2: What coaching news is highlighted in the NFL?
A lot of fast food. A lot of fast food talk with him. We're going to do Firefest. We're going to talk coaching changes. And we're going to get you ready for the third to last weekend in the NFL season. So embrace it. And it's all brought to you by our friends at GameTime. The GameTime app gives the advantage back to fans.
It's the hack for unlocking amazing tickets and experiences in just a few taps. It's incredibly easy to use. The GameTime guarantee means you can trust you'll get 100% authentic tickets on time and at the best price. Plus, fees are always included. So what you see is what you pay. Hank, what are we looking at? We're looking at the Patriots versus the Texans. Okay. I'm looking at it.
We're looking at it. It's going to be snowing. Or you could go to the college football playoff championship. Those tickets are crazy. Okay. So you're all over the place. This sounds like you're not ready. No, because it was Patriots at Bears next week. But it's Texans at Patriots, $278. Okay. Patriots at Bears? I typed in Patriots and it populated because I'm in Chicago. Got it. Patriots at Bears.
Next week? Game time is... No, it's not next week. That's impossible. Game time is super... What do you mean? He just got... He got a Bears game. Time TBD. Oh, that's next year. $391 right now. Yeah. So, game time. Super easy to use. You open the game time app. You click on the game you want. You can see the whole stadium right there.
Chapter 3: How are the upcoming NFL games previewed?
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Use code PMT for $20 off your first purchase. Terms apply. Again, create an account. Redeem code PMT for $20 off. Download the GameTime app today. Okay, let's go. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Welcome to part of my take presented by DraftKings. The crown is yours. Today is Friday, January 16th. And John Harbaugh, you're a New York Giant. Congratulations, John. They didn't let you out of the building.
You got kidnapped. You're their guy. You wanted them. They brought in the heavy hitters at the end. It was pretty clear that Harbaugh wanted the opportunity to coach a hot young quarterback. And Jameis Winston's got his guy now. Yeah, this was, I mean, this is a smart move. I like this move for the Giants. It feels like they needed stability. They've gone through how many coaches?
Six coaches, I think, since Tom Coughlin. Can you name them? All right, so we got Dable. Yep. We got McAdoo. Yep. We got Joe Judge. Yep. We got, oh, man. Oh, man. Was Spagnola in there? Spags. Yeah, Spags. Spags. Who? There's one everybody forgets. Oh, no. You can't forget this guy, Big Cat. Who am I forgetting? Pat Shermer. Oh, Pat Shermer. Pat Shermer. And who is the sixth?
Are we counting Kafka? Kafka, I don't think he counts technically. Let's see. New York Giants head coaches. We're going to find it right now. Shermer is the big one, though. Shermer is the big one that everyone forgets. He's a perfect guy to forget. A very forgettable guy overall. Also coach of the Browns at one point. Yeah. All right.
So it went Coughlin, McAdoo, Spags, Shermer, Joe Judge, Brian Dable, Mike Kafka. Yep. So it was just Shermer that I forgot. A very forgettable 9-23. Yeah, I feel like this is a great hire for them. I do too. He's stable. They want a guy that's going to come in that's going to just be able to oversee everything and they don't have to worry about answering questions about his job in two years. Yep.
And Harbaugh is that guy. And he had his pick of the litter. So I'm assuming that they worked out whatever situation it was with Joe Shane that was making some people uncomfortable. But I feel like if Harbaugh goes back to them in a year and is like, hey, I can't work with this guy anymore, they're going to listen to Harbaugh over Shane, right?
Yeah, they're giving him five years reported $100 million. So that's a nice paycheck. Also Harbaugh I believe will get some of the best coordinators because he will attract that there's stability it feels like Harbaugh you're hiring him you're not going to fire him in three years even if it takes a little bit of time to get things going the Giants have been in hell when it comes to coaching and
everything that's going on. They've basically had a couple like flash in the pans where, you know, remember Brian Dable went to the playoffs his first year. Did McAdoo go to the playoffs? I think he went to the playoffs. He might have gone to the playoffs. So it's like they've just been in this revolving door of like a coach doing okay for a year and then just falling flat on their face.
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Chapter 4: What insights are shared about third and six situations in football?
Worse than Brady Cook. What is the numbers? Whatever. How many times has he had third and six? How many times has this happened? This makes Sunday's game so funny in the cave. Anytime there's a third and six, it's going to be high alert. Third and six is going to be the best. Oh, we need a third and six. Come get your boy because he is... He is three for... Oh. Five for 18. He's five for 18. Wow.
What a sample size. 27%. The league average, I believe, is 40... Now, hold on, Hank. So that's like one throw.
Hold on, Hank. Hold on.
That's literally like one throw. No, it's 18. It's 18 throws. No, I'm saying he's 27%. The league average is 40%. If he goes... Eight for 20, then he's there. I'm sorry that he sucks on 36. 40%. That'd be three more throws. Two more throws. Three more. You just went five to eight. Whatever. 50% is the league average. He's 27%. Hank, now what PFT has presented to you here. Stat hole.
It's a PFT joint featuring stat hole. Stat hole is a very important part of this research project. I don't know why you're getting upset at the numbers. That's the part that's confusing to your stats guy. Here's all I'm going to ask, Hank, because obviously it's a very minute stat that doesn't come up very often. 36 is a pretty important down. But now that PFT has presented this to you,
If it is one minute and 35 seconds left in the game and Drake May is faced with a third and six, are you going to be at least a little bit nervous and thinking in your head, oh, fuck. I would already be nervous. No. Oh, fuck. We're at third and six.
No. You should be.
I will not be any more nervous than I already would be. You should be because he's 27% completion percentage on it, so... If you're objectively looking at the game and trying to figure out whether or not you're nervous, if there's a... I'm not good at math. I'm sorry. Staddle is a nice guy. He's been in the office the last few weeks. What, yeah? You got anything to say? No.
How much of a loser do you have to be to be that deep into research to be like, all right, I need to dig to find some dirt on Drake May. Let's check third and three. Let's check third and four. Let's check third and five. Like, how deep do you have to go? I don't understand why you're upset about it. I'm not. I'm just thinking about it. How do you find that? Can I ask a follow-up question?
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Chapter 5: How does the weather impact the upcoming Rams vs. Bears game?
That's the game plan. They probably don't even have researchers that go that deep. Well, if they listen to the show. Yeah, somebody from the Texans is hearing this right now. How would you game plan that? Just get him to third and six. Yeah, that's true. Just stay out of third and six. But no, not bolted board. Just make sure if it's second and eight. Or second and six. You got to run the ball.
Yeah. You got to get to second and five. Or take a sack. Yeah, if it's second and eight, though, and you're running the ball and everything's closed up, just go down. Make sure you stay third and seven. Belichick would tell them false start. Yeah. Back it up five yards. Oh, imagine if they false started on a third and six. It'd be genius. I mean, got it?
Vrabel's probably listening to this right now. And now he knows. If anything, Hank, you should be kissing my feet for telling you this stat because now you have, he's the total package with that awesome defense that he has carrying him. And if you have this one piece of information, this is one thing that you can improve on.
Wait, can you start at the beginning, the completion percentage, all that stuff? Those are all great stats. Those aren't defensive stats, buddy. No, I'm saying those are all great stats. Right, so how can you say they're great stats but then also say the defense is carrying them? Last game, I think we can all agree that the defense did a really good job against the Chargers. And how many points?
16 points? It's not a knock because Tom Brady, in his first playoff appearance, scored 16 points. It's not... What'd they do that year? You shouldn't feel ashamed by having a strong defense that can carry your young, flawed quarterback. And this might be the only flaw that he has. It's 3rd-and-6th. That's fine with me. 3-6 Mafia. Hell yeah. Does the Texans' defense concern you at all?
Because I really do think this is going to be a low-scoring game where it's going to be very tight. CJ Stroud didn't look good. No Nico Collins. Yeah, I mean, their defense definitely scares me, but I think our defense is going to hold up against their offense, and I think our offense is better. I just think we match up better in all facets of the game. Okay.
Coach, home field advantage, quarterback. Defense, they probably have an advantage, but I like our odds. I also – it's one of those – the under – like, I don't know how this goes over 40 points. Right. I don't know who the Texans are going to throw to. Yeah, like – Well – C. Kirk. But true Patriots have no problem defending C. Kirk. It's true. Dalton Schultz.
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Chapter 6: What strategies are discussed for the Texans vs. Patriots matchup?
I feel like Dalton Schultz, if the Texans are going to win, Dalton Schultz will be heard from. It's like he has to be. Did you see the stat that the... So the Houston Texans are the... The newest franchise we have in the NFL. They were established in 1999. The oldest franchise we have in the NFL is the Arizona Cardinals because they were the Chicago Cardinals.
They've been around for like 125 years or something like that. The Houston Texans, with their win against the Steelers, have the same amount of playoff wins as the Cardinals franchise. Yeah. It's tough.
Yeah.
It's tough to get through. It's tough. The Texans, are they the only team that's never played in a Super Bowl? No. Lions? Browns? Oh, that's right, yeah. Jaguars? Yeah. That was a dumb question I asked. Sorry, I didn't mean to. Yeah, it's just because the Lions and Browns are always talked about. Yeah. There's more, right? No. Lions, Browns, Jaguars, Texans. So what is the stat?
The Texans, are they the only team that's never played in a championship game, a conference championship game? That might be true. That might be the one. That might be true. Because we know the Jaguars have. Yep. We know the Lions did two years ago. And then they did, obviously, with Barry Sanders as well. Yeah, the Texans. Yeah, that's it. Okay. They're the only team.
So they're going for history. They're going for history. They have never played in a conference championship game. I guess they were established in 2002. I think they were announced to be a franchise in 1999. Yep. Final score prediction, Hank? I'm going to go with 21-10. 21-10. Who's winning? New England Patriots. Okay. I'm going to go 3-6. 3-6, and I think the Texans win a defensive struggle.
You just have to admit, though, we need a third and six in the first quarter on Sunday. A million third and sixes. It could be good for you. You're just going to be able to dunk in his face once you get a third and six. You should be excited for third and six. Embrace the challenge. Big opportunity. I love the challenge. Why was Rabel screaming for more milk on the sidelines?
He just kept screaming milk over and over. What are you doing with that football? Milton. Milton Williams? No. It sounded like he was screaming for milk. I did think he was saying milk until he went up to Milton Williams after. That makes sense. I love Rabel. It was very funny. He was just screaming. Melt. Melt. Melt.
I love Rabel, but if the Patriots make it to the AFC Championship game, I'm going to be a nervous guy. Very nervous guy. If the Texans make it, I'm going to be the nervous guy with the pinky. We got competing bets. We do. So just to remind everyone your bet. Caring about your friend. I do care about my friend. Remind everyone the bet that was made, what, three years ago?
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Chapter 7: What insights do LaFleur and McVay share about coaching strategies?
But is there anything that Matt LaFleur can share with Sean McVay that Sean McVay doesn't know already? Like, how does that – they're both incredible football minds. He's like, he chews Dentine ice. Yeah. I think. What happens there where they get on the phone and is it – because I saw that clip and I was like, uh-oh. But then I thought about it. It goes like this. I fucking hate Ben Johnson.
Yeah, right, right. We know that's happening. And then he's like – I think I'm going to fucking hate Ben Johnson, too. Yeah, dude, I'm sorry. That sucks. I love that Ben Johnson's hated by everyone, too. It's fucking awesome. It's like he's got to defend. It's like a video game. He's got to defend, like, multiple levels of Shanahan's. Yeah. So, like, he takes out LeFleur. Then he gets McVay.
And then final boss Shanahan. Then you got super boss maybe D'Amico Ryan. Another Shanahan. It's a Middle Ages Game of Thrones-style blood feud in the National Football League, and I'm here for it. Honestly, I think it's a little bit embarrassing. That the coaches that are good friends are like, this guy's fucking mean, and we're going to beat him.
It reminds me of people that team up in solo lobbies and video games.
Chapter 8: How do the hosts react to the 49ers' injury situation?
If it's a PVP game, I'm supposed to be fighting this guy in this building. I don't need you coming over here saying, stay right there. I'll get him. You heal up. Nah, bro. That's bullshit. That's weak. Shout out to Arc Raiders, by the way. Zach, think of a question about video games because you're going to do the rowback question in a second. Real quick, winners for each game. Go down the list.
I've got the Bears beating the Rams. I've got the Broncos beating the Bills. I've got the Seahawks beating the Niners. And then Patriots. And I've got the Patriots winning too. And then, yeah, you don't want the next round too? I can give you the next round. I'll tell you what's going to happen. Yeah, well, I mean, I got the Broncos beating the Patriots.
I've got the Seahawks beating the Bears in Seattle. And then I've got the Broncos or the Seahawks beating the Broncos on the Superbowl. I know it's chalky. I understand that. But people always say like, Oh, you just picked the one seeds just because they're higher seeds. And this sounds backwards just because they're higher seeds doesn't mean they're better teams. Okay. Yeah.
Sometimes there's like context around this stuff. And nuance, I think the word is. Yeah. I mean, the Bills opened as favorites. I think it switched back to the Broncos. It's crazy. But that's not – picking the Broncos is not – it's not like they're 14.3. God forbid I pick the teams that I think are going to win.
Yeah, I actually – well, I don't even want to get ahead of myself, but I do think, like, if the Bears have to play the Seahawks, that's a nightmare matchup because of how good that defense is. But hopefully we have that problem to get to after Sunday night. Yes. All right, rowback question, R-H-O-B-A-C-K.com, promo code TAKE.
20% off your first purchase, Q-Zips, polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts, rowback.com, promo code TAKE. Zach, Zach is up. Zach, have you ever met Kyle? You've never met Kyle. I have not met Kyle, no, sir. What's up, Zach? What's up, Zach? Virtually, I've met Kyle. Kyle, have you dabbled in, I heard the shout out a little bit earlier, have you dabbled in our craters at all? Oh, big time, buddy.
Big time. I'm ready for, my projects are done. I'm ready for the expedition. Now, are you doing like PVP? Like are you going after other teams or are you going against the map, against the arcs? Sometimes I do a little recruiting when I'm doing against the arcs. I'll do some recruiting in solo lobbies. But for the most part, I'm testing out the guns that I got from my free loadout.
You know what I'm saying? I like that because I'm historically running free loadouts too, man. It's too risky to go in there and lose everything. That's it. That's it. Kyle, have you – follow-up question on Zach's question. Have you ever accidentally stayed up until 5 a.m. playing arc raiders? Yeah, I stayed up, and then I was late to a really important meeting, actually, this one time.
I'm sorry that happened to you, man. It happens to some people sometimes, and all we can do is be better, right? And then Howie came in and fired you? Yeah. You just got to, God willing, help the team and keep showing up. Yeah. What happens in an NFL locker room when a guy sleeps in through a meeting? $12,000 non-tax write-off and man-o-man, just like the look of death. Oh.
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