S13 EP17: Your dog is skinny, but you is fat...
episodePreviously titled “S13 EP17: Your dog is skinny, buy you is fat...” — renamed by the publisher on Sep 15, 2026
Parenting Hell with Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe
1h 4m
2 speakers
8 chapters
transcribed 20 hours ago
Transcript
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Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.
What is the TUI holiday promotion that opens the episode?
This episode is presented
by Tui. Look, you've got to love a family holiday, Josh. Oh, you've gotta love it. Who wouldn't love it, Rob? You know what the problem with the holidays is, right? You don't get enough of them. That's the problem. Exactly. So you need to make the most of your holiday, which is why two e gives you more.
So that's got to be easy booking for incredible destinations with amazing hotels that offer all the things you love: perfect beaches, mouthwatering food, on-site splash parks, wellness centers, swim up suites, and fun stuff for the kids. And now you can get even more by joining the brand new Tui Smiles Rewards Club for free. We're talking members only deals, personalized rewards from Tui and some of their brilliant partners, and plenty of chances to win a
Amazing prizes. Love it. Get more from your holiday book now and discover the Tui Smiles Reward Club at two.co.uk. Atoll and Abta protected. Hello, you're listening to Parent in Hell with
Can you say Rob? Well pocket. Thing is. Because we can do it
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you, Ricardo. Thank you. This is Connie aged three and eleven months. Just started school with her big brother Freddie, age seven. Been listening since lockdown and love the podcast. Yes, every time I go on holiday, I do get asked if I'm English or if I'm Johnny English when hotel receptions see the passport. Robert English.
How does Rob describe his recent stomach and urinary problems?
What
His name's Robert English.
Yeah. Bye. You're right then, mate. Yeah, I d I didn't understand the Johnny English bit, but I suppose. Fair enough. It's just it's just a word. Mr. Bean. The Mr. Bean film. Yes, I know that was based on debit card advert or credit card advert. Was it?
Yeah. The kids watched the Bumblebee one. Oh yeah. Good? Yeah, not too bad. How are you, Josh? You good? You're you're the same colour as the hotel room. I'm not very well. Oh, what's wrong? I think I've got
well, Rob, I don't want to go too graphic. Okay, go on. I've got stomach problems. Oh. I just keep needing a piss. Okay. And I'm constipated and I've got
stomach pains. So y you can't shit but you can't stop pissing. Yeah. So full beans one way, no beans the other. Exactly,
Rob. And I feel like I need a piss and then it takes ages to have a I've got a UTI, I think, or something. And is it it's painful. So so What what would help you now?
What crazy story does Josh tell about the florist and the flowers?
And I'm just fucked. What would help me now? Yeah. Well, there's nothing you can do from that distance. I'm just trying to you know lend it supportive ear. Well I bought some I bought some when I came into town Bought some I w I won't say the brand, 'cause they're not paying us. Some clinically proven medicine for short term occasional constipation. Right. This is the game. Should I?
Take it. See a card. Say a quick it's See how good it
is. Because you
got your airpods on so you could actually report away from
within eight to twelve hours. I should just go for it now. Oh I need some water. That stinks. What stinks? The the pill. Yeah. You don't got any water? In the hotel room. Yeah, well I have, but not sat here. So I'll do it at the end of the it's gonna get some if you want. No, it takes twelve hours.
Let's get some water now and just have yeah, before the record, yeah. And it's just a little bit of jeopardy for the app, isn't there?
Yeah, epidemic,
will Josh need a ship before the end of the show?
Hopefully I take that at this stage in the game.
Yeah. There we go, down the ash. Your your t shirt is the exact same colour as the wall. It is, isn't it? That wasn't intentional. You look like a floating head. Yeah, well that's bit of fun, isn't it? Bit of fun. Um So I've not been well. You look sh you look tired and stressed. You're still in the hotel
room. No, I'm not stressed. I'm tired. I do you know what, Rob? Full disclosure. Go on. I think we've done the launch show of Strictly on Wednesday.
Mm.
I can say that, that's fine.
This happened, yeah.
It went well.
Yeah.
The next day. I don't think I've ever been so tired in my life.
Just your body just r like ah it finally relaxed.
And I've not I still don't feel like I've fully recovered.
Mm.
Admittedly, I had had a show in Dublin the next day, which wasn't ideal prep.
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What is the TUI holiday promotion that opens the episode?
0:00–1:28
2
How does Rob describe his recent stomach and urinary problems?
1:28–2:29
3
What crazy story does Josh tell about the florist and the flowers?
2:29–5:22
4
How did the hosts experience the Oasis premiere and the after‑party?
5:22–9:50
5
What updates do Rob and Josh give on the house renovation and garage roof?
9:50–13:48
6
Why did Josh switch to an eSIM and how is he managing phone use?
13:48–17:03
7
What are the September Reset plans for back‑to‑school and personal goals?
17:03–20:33
8
Which small businesses get a shout‑out and how can listeners support them?
20:33–1:04:35