How to Stop the Pain of Rejection & How Couples Can Fight Without Falling Apart
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Why do crowds move without collisions and what does that reveal about our brains?
I know you like interesting and thought-provoking conversations and ideas because you listen to something you should know. So let me recommend another podcast I know you will enjoy. It's The Jordan Harbinger Show. Jordan has a real talent for getting his guests to share stories and offer thought-provoking insights. Over the years, I've sent a lot of people to listen, and I get feedback from people who are so glad I introduced them to The Jordan Harbinger Show. Recently, he discussed Scientology and the children who are raised in that organization. It's a fascinating conversation. And he talked with Dr. Rhonda Patrick about how to protect your mind and body from the modern world. And it's tougher than you think.
I've gotten to know Jordan pretty well. We talk frequently, and I tell you, he is a very smart, insightful guy who does a hell of a podcast. Check out The Jordan Harbinger Show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen to podcasts. today on Something You Should Know. Ever wonder why pedestrians don't bump into each other more often? Then many of us fear rejection. But you're going to meet a guy who does the strangest things to seek out rejection and why.
I asked people to take selfies with me. Okay, I was just in the airport the other day. I saw a guy sitting there waiting for his flight. I said, can I untie and retie your shoes? Instead of trying to find the path of this resistance through my life, let me have fun with rejection.
Also, why are most people's signatures completely illegible? And all couples fight, but the words you use can make all the difference.
Instead of you're so selfish, it could be I feel lonely. When people speak in emotions, it's much easier to then have the other person tune in and care for those emotions versus speaking in thoughts and judgments.
All this today on Something You Should Know.
Something you should know. Fascinating intel. The world's top experts. And practical advice you can use in your life. Today, Something You Should Know with Mike Carruthers.
Wouldn't you think that people walking along a busy sidewalk or in a mall or at a stadium where it's really busy, you would think people would bump into each other more often than they do. Why is that? I'm Mike Carruthers, and that's what we're going to start with today on this episode of Something You Should Know. So if you've ever noticed, pedestrians, if you watch them, will naturally sort themselves into lanes, even when there are no signs telling them to do that. Researchers studying crowds have found that people spontaneously organize themselves much like traffic. In countries where people drive on the right, pedestrians usually drift right. In countries that drive on the left, people favor the left.
It's not a law, it's just an unconscious way our brains reduce collisions and keep everyone moving. That's why airports, malls, and stadiums can move thousands of people with surprisingly little chaos. Until someone goes the wrong way. And that is something you should know. Nobody likes being rejected. In fact, for many people, the fear of rejection is powerful enough to stop them from asking someone out, applying for a better job, negotiating a higher salary, starting a business, or even speaking up in a meeting. We avoid rejection because we assume it will be painful. But what if that's exactly backwards? What if the best way to get over your fear of rejection is to deliberately seek it out? Imagine trying to get rejected every day until it simply loses its power over you.
As strange as that sounds, that's exactly what my guest did, and what he discovered completely changed the way he approached life. It also revealed something surprising. We often expect to be rejected far more than we actually are. Here to explain is Ja Jung. He is an award-winning entrepreneur, speaker, and best-selling author. His TED Talk about his quest to get rejected says, has been viewed more than 11 million times. And he's author of a book called Easy Discipline, An Unconventional Way to Achieve Ambitious Things.
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
Why do crowds move without collisions and what does that reveal about our brains?
0:00–5:23
2
How does the fear of rejection hold us back from opportunities?
5:23–9:53
3
What is ‘rejection therapy’ and why did Jia Jiang try to get rejected 100 times?
9:53–16:06
4
What surprising results did Jia Jiang discover from his 100‑day rejection experiment?
16:06–20:43
5
How can focusing on the input (the act of asking) change the outcome of requests?
20:43–26:28
6
Why do couples keep fighting about the same issues and how can they break the cycle?
26:28–32:55
7
What practical steps can partners use to de‑escalate fights and rebuild empathy?
32:55–39:50
8
Why do our signatures become illegible over time and what does that tell us about the brain?
39:50–42:55
Speakers
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