Something You Should Know
Why Couples Hate to Talk About Money & How Scents and Smells Affect You
13 Jan 2025
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Ramit has a best-selling book that's been around for a while called I Will Teach You to Be Rich. And he has a brand new book out that is already a big bestseller called Money for Couples. Hi, Ramit. Welcome back to Something You Should Know. Thanks for having me back. So let's start with this question. Why do you think that money is such a touchy subject for couples?
Why do couples avoid it or don't talk openly about it? That it's just something we'd really rather not discuss.
The biggest reason is that we usually only talk about money when we fight. Think about it. Someone is a spender. Someone is a saver. You end up looking at the credit card bill. You go, how could you spend that much? And then you go to sleep, paper over it, and wait for the next fight to happen six weeks later. And most couples do this for the next 40 years.
There's got to be a better way to talk about money that makes it positive and fun.
Yeah, well, when you explain it that way, who wouldn't want to do that? Who wouldn't want to make the topic fun? Because it's a topic, whether you discuss it or not, it's there. It's there and it's either going to be trouble or if there's a way to make it fun, then let's make it fun.
Yeah, it's kind of crazy. I mean, think about the fact that most of us, we have this deep, invisible belief in America that money is unromantic. And the reason I got so interested in money and couples is that it is one of the last taboos. You know, many of us would rather talk about our sex lives than how much money we make, how we spend it. Are we on track for retirement?
And when you start to shine a light on these things, not just with one person's money, but a couple's money, you start to unravel a series of invisible expectations. I just find it incredibly juicy, and it's incredibly fun to watch couples finally develop a shared vision of a rich life.
Well, it does seem, and I can speak from my own experience, but also just from talking to other people, that... A big part of the problem is because so much goes unsaid, undiscussed, assumptions are made, and I know what I think you should do, but I don't ever tell you, that we just don't sit down and talk about it.
starts when we're dating you know many couples uh when they're dating they don't have serious conversations about money in fact there's only really three or four moments in a couple's entire life that they really talk about money one of them is when they buy a house another one if if they do another one is if they have children you skip over to about age 58 when they start to think about retirement and then often it's death
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