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Perspective Taking | Examples and Activities for Speech TherapyPerspective taking is our ability to think about a situation from someone else’s point of view.
If we can take a guess at how someone else is thinking or feeling, it can help us navigate social interactions and better understand the world around us.
On this page, we’ll talk about how we can help children and teens learn to use perspective taking to understand the world around them. We’ll do it in a neurodiversity-affirming way that honors individual differences and allows for each person to communicate in a way that feels authentic to them.
Social Awareness CurriculumA Structured Program for Helping Children And Teens Learn Perspective-Taking and Other Interaction SkillsView the Social Awareness CurriculumWhat is Perspective Taking?Imagine you’re dropped onto an alien world, surrounded by creatures who don’t talk or act like you at all. You have no idea what their gestures, words, and actions mean. Or why they are doing what they do. Think about how scary that would be!
Now think about our children and teens who struggle to understand the actions of those around them. The world can seem a scary place when you don’t understand what’s happening. That’s where this area of therapy comes in.
Our ability to understand a situation from another person’s point of view is called “perspective taking”.
I want to be Neurodiversity-Affirming. Is it OK To Work on Perspective Taking?Perspective-taking and empathy training have gotten a bad wrap with our newer understanding of neurodiversity. But that’s simply because the way we used to teach these skills was….maybe not the best. Our old teaching ways were (inadvertently) telling children that they needed to act like everyone else. That there was something wrong with them because their brains worked differently.
We now know that all brains work differently and there are many different “normal” ways of being! And this is amazingly empowering! But our neurodiverse populations still deserve to understand what’s going on around them.
So now, we teach perspective-taking as a way to understand the world around us. Not because we want kids to change and conform. But because they will feel more safe, secure, and loved if they understand why others do the things they do. And they can navigate social situations their own way.
How Can I Work on Perspective Taking in a Neurodiversity-Affirming Way?As you work on this skill, make sure you are empowering your clients to use these tools to understand the world around them. And remind them that it’s OK to act, think, and speak differently than those around them. The important thing is that they find a way to move through this world that feels natural and authentic to them.
(And I should add that this type of education shouldn’t be kept JUST for kids with social impairments. I argue that literally every child in every school would benefit from this type of education so that we are ALL learning to understand and be respectful of individual differences.)
A Pre-Made Curriculum for Perspective Taking, Empathy, and Understanding Others:Here at Speech and Language Kids, we’ve put together an amazing program that you can use TODAY to teach perspective taking in a neurodiversity-affirming way.
Our Social Awareness Curriculum starts at the younger levels with teaching them to respond to and engage with others. It then goes on to teaching these skills:
Understanding that Others may have Different Perspectives and Feelings
Using Perspective Taking to Understand Others
Using Perspective Taking to Resolve Conflicts and Misunderstandings
This Curriculum is available with a subscription to the SLK Curriculum Program. We have plans starting at just $50 per month and that includes EVERYTHING, including our AI-powered social scenario generator that you can use to create custom scenarios to discuss and practice in therapy.
Social Awareness CurriculumA Structured Program for Helping Children And Teens Learn Perspective-Taking and Other Interaction SkillsView the Social Awareness CurriculumPerspective Taking Activities by Age:
Preschoolers and Perspective Taking
Perspective Taking Examples for Preschoolers:
Have you ever seen 2 babies in a room and when one starts crying, the other starts crying too? That’s because babies don’t know that someone else’s discomfort is not their own. They don’t have the ability to take the perspective of someone else. We call this theory of mind (meaning that the child understands that other people have other perspectives than their own). Babies don’t have theory of mind yet.
Around 2-3 years of age, children start to gain an understanding that each person is experiencing different things. During the preschool years, we should see a child start to show concern for others who are upset. They may show concern for someone who is crying or try to do something to help that person.
However, at this stage, children still often confuse their own perspective with others. A preschooler may think that since she likes ice cream, everyone likes ice cream. This may lead to actions like giving someone who is crying a favorite toy because the child knows that would cheer him up if he had it himself.
Perspective Taking Activities for Preschoolers:
Here are some ideas of what you can do with preschoolers who are not yet showing signs of understanding that other people have different perspectives and feelings than we do:
Point out the emotions of others. Show the child when another child is crying and talk about how he feels and why he feels that way. This can be especially important if the child you’re working with accidently caused the other child to be upset in the first place.
Read books and talk about how the characters may be feeling in the book. Identify the emotions and then talk about why the character feels that way or how you know (he is smiling, he found his toy, etc.)
Talk about your own emotions. Label your own emotions to the child throughout the day. Talk about why you feel that way. If you have negative emotions, talk about what would make you feel better. Help the child identify and regulate his/her own emotions.
Help the child problem-solve situations to make someone feel better. If another child is upset, ask the child what he could do to help that friend. Give him some ideas like going to get an ice pack, helping the other child up off the group, or finding something fun for the child to do.
Perspective Taking in Grades K-2
Perspective Taking Examples in K-2
During these years, the child’s perspective-taking skills should continue to grow. The child should develop the ability to guess what people are thinking or feeling based on their behaviors and understand their motivation for certain behaviors.
Keep in mind that this is still happening at a very simplistic level. For example, if the child you’re working with watches another child hit his teacher, the K-2nd grader should be able to guess that the child hit his teacher because he was mad. He probably wouldn’t be able to tell you though that the other child was frustrated because the task that the teacher asked him to do was too difficult.
Perspective Taking Activities in K-2
When the child you’re working with does something that causes strong emotions in another person (happy or sad), point out the other child’s reaction. Ask the child why he thinks he had that reaction. Talk about the other child’s emotions and why he is feeling that way. Then, talk about how that child’s actions reflected that emotion.
Ask the child how he would feel if he were in the other person’s situation. For example, if he takes a toy away from another child, ask him “How would you feel if Johnny took your favorite toy away from you?”. Help the child identify the emotion he would feel and then explain that the other child feels the same way.
While reading books, help the child make guesses for why the characters did certain actions. Talk about the motivation behind behaviors by linking the behavior or action to an emotion. Then, talk about why the character would have felt that emotion.
Perspective Taking in Grades 3-5
Perspective Taking Examples in 3-5th Grade
During these grades, children begin to develop the understanding that everyone sees situations from a different perspective and that people may therefore misinterpret what’s going on. For example, the child will understand if you explain to him that when he walked up to his friend and hit him on the back, he meant it as a greeting but his friend interpreted it as anger.
Children in these grades also begin to understand that a person may be hiding his/her true feelings. For example, they would begin to understand that if a child said “I’m okay” but still had tears in her eyes, she may not really be ok but she just wants others to think she is.
Perspective Taking Activities for 3-5th Grade
When reading a story with multiple characters, help the child map out how each character interpreted an event or situation. Write down each character’s name and then write what each character was thinking or feeling during the situation. Help the child discover differences between the different characters’ perspectives by pointing out when one character had different information than the others (example: Johnny didn’t know everyone was throwing him a surprise party so he felt surprised when everyone jumped out but the people who jumped up were not surprised. They knew it was a party).
If the child you are working with becomes surprised by someone’s reaction to something he did, help him describe how the other person may have felt during the situation and help the child put himself in that other person’s situation. Help the child understand what the other person’s reaction was based on.
Help the child resolve conflicts by examining the perspective of each participant (in the conflict) and then coming up with a solution that will offer a compromise for all perspectives. This may involve sharing, taking turns, using words to explain the situation more thoroughly, etc.
Talk to the child about reading body language and using perspective-taking to determine if someone is hiding their true feelings. Talk about sarcasm and figurative language as ways the people may say one thing but mean something else.
Perspective Taking in Grades 6-8
Perspective Taking Examples in Middle School
At this point, children continue to fine-tune their ability to take the perspective of others and understand someone else’s thoughts, feelings, and motives. They continue to develop the skills we’ve mentioned previously but in more complex ways.
These children are also beginning to understand that people often have multiple motives for their behavior and sometimes those motives are conflicting. For example, the child may understand that a teenager may be tempted to smoke because it will make him look cooler (peer pressure) but that he may be reluctant to do so because it is unhealthy and gross.
Perspective Taking Activities for Middle Schoolers
When reading a story with the child, ask the child to think about the motives that a character has for certain actions. Explore all of the motives that the character has and talk about if any of the motives conflict with each other (Harry Potter is great for this. He often has conflicting motives and must decide what to do on his own. Plus, it’s written from his point of view so you often get to hear his inner dialogue and debate).
Ask the child about his own motives for certain behaviors. Explore all motives, including conflicting motives. Talk with the child about how you make a decision when you have conflicting motives (such as using a pro/con list).
If the child expresses confusion or concern over a decision that someone else has made, help him write down the different motives that the person had that led to him making that decision. Ask the child if he would have made the same decision in that situation or if he would have chosen something else. Explain to the child that we all have the right to make our choices based on our own opinions, feelings, and experiences and sometimes we disagree on the best plan of action but that’s ok.
Perspective Taking in Grades 9-12 (High School)
Perspective Taking Examples in High Schoolers
At this point, these young adults begin to understand that a person’s culture and environment impact their personality, behavior, and perspectives. They begin to see how we are all a product of our environment and that past events and present circumstances all affect how we see the world. For example, young adults may begin to see that a person who has always been discriminated against is more likely to assume he’s being discriminated against than someone who has never known discrimination.
These young adults are also beginning to understand that people may not always be fully aware of why they act the way they do. They may be acting a certain way because they were brought up that way or they are repressing some feelings that they don’t want to deal with.
Perspective Taking Activities for High Schoolers
Talk with the student about cultural impacts on behavior. Discuss how different cultures may impact a person’s behavior. Talk openly about differences among cultural groups but avoid making over-generalized statements that may be taken as racist, sexist, or otherwise discriminatory.
Read stories about people from other countries. Talk about how their daily lives are different than the student’s and discuss how their environment has impacted the way they live day-to-day.
Read stories about people who have very different life experiences than the student. Read about children with poor upbringings or who faced adversity early in life. Talk about how those experiences changed that person (for the better or worse) and how that person’s perspective is different as a result.
Talk about how historical events may have changed a certain cultural group’s behaviors, thoughts, or motivations. For example, talk about how getting the right to vote changed women’s behaviors and attitudes or how slavery of African-Americans in America affected their behaviors and attitudes.
A Structured Program for Teaching Perspective TakingGrab our social interaction workbooks and tools inside the SLK Curriculum:
Social Awareness CurriculumA Structured Program for Helping Children And Teens Learn Perspective-Taking and Other Interaction SkillsView the Social Awareness CurriculumListen to the Podcast Version of this Info Here:Sources:
http://www.education.com/reference/article/perspective-taking-theory-mind-different/
https://jillkuzma.wordpress.com/perspective-taking-skills/
About the Author: Carrie Clark, MA CCC-SLPHi, I’m Carrie! I’m a speech-language pathologist from Columbia, Missouri, USA. I’ve worked with children and teenagers of all ages in schools, preschools, and even my own private practice. I love digging through the research on speech and language topics and breaking it down into step-by-step plans for my followers.
Fun Fact: I play the cello. I took lessons for cello and piano for most of my childhood, though I’m way better at cello than I ever got a piano. I also taught myself guitar as an adult. I have a super fun bright blue electric guitar that I get out every once in a while and play around on. And then I curse the fact that since I don’t play consistently, I don’t have my callouses built up.
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