If You Still Feel This... You Haven't Actually Forgiven Them (EP 191)
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What does it mean to truly forgive someone?
Be honest, there's people that you say that you've forgiven in your life, but then you freak out a little bit when their name gets brought up. You say you forgive someone and then you see them in school and then all of a sudden that bitterness or that grudge comes back. You say you forgave that relationship that failed, but every time you see a post with their new boyfriend or girlfriend, that bitterness and that rage begins to fill your heart. Forgiveness can be a subject that can be deeply hard to conquer, that can be deeply hard to do. And we oftentimes view forgiveness in a bad light. We think that forgiveness is a one-time act. And we kind of view repentance the same way. You know, we think repentance is a one-time act.
No, no, no, no, no.
How is forgiveness viewed in Christianity?
Forgiveness and repentance are similar in the sense that it's not just a one-time thing. It's a daily practice. Welcome back to the Bryce Crawford Podcast. Today's episode, we are talking about forgiveness. We will be in Matthew chapter 18, 1 Samuel 24, and a little bit of Matthew chapter 6 today. But first, we need to define exactly what forgiveness is. We hear the word forgive, this untangible feeling and emotion that we so quite often talk about in Christianity, but we don't really understand fully, I believe, what forgiveness is. What is forgiveness? Forgiveness is canceling the debt that someone owes you. And that's why we get a little sensitive when we talk about forgiveness because we say, oh, I forgive this person.
But then you see them and you are reminded by the way that they hurt you, by the way that they backstabbed you, by the way that they did this thing. and really you haven't forgiven them, you've shoved your feelings underneath the rug. Forgiveness is canceling the debt that someone owes you. And that's exactly what Jesus does on the cross. And we'll get to that in a little bit later. But forgiveness is understanding that the payment that someone owes you, you say, no, I got it. We don't return evil for evil. That's the whole purpose of Matthew chapter 6. It's Matthew chapter 6 literally talks about, hey, if someone hits you on the right cheek, give them the other one. And if someone takes your tunic, you give them the other tunic because you don't return evil for evil.
You see, karma is not a law of human nature within the kingdom of heaven. Forgiveness is the law of human nature. You know, forgiveness is so radical because it doesn't make sense. What do you mean I don't return back to them what they did to me? What do you mean I don't hit them harder than they hit me first? What do you mean that I don't hold it against them until they bend? You know why? Because we like to say that we're free. Oh, I live in freedom. but you live in unforgiveness. Freedom as a Christian and unforgiveness can't coexist because forgiveness not only frees the person that has done you wrong, but it frees you as a human being. And that's what we see in Matthew chapter 18 right off the bat.
You know, Peter asked Jesus in Matthew chapter 18, it says, and Peter came up to him and said, Lord, How often will my brother sin against me? And I forgive him as many as seven times.
Why is forgiveness considered a daily practice?
And we have to understand in Jewish tradition that seven was the number of completion. So you forgave someone seven times, that was the number of completion. Then after that, technically, you didn't have to forgive them. And Jesus' response is interesting. He says, I don't say to you seven times. I say 77 times, or some translations say 70 times 7. 70 times 7 does not mean you forgive the person 490 times. And then on the 491st time, not or not, no more forgiveness for you. That's not what he means. Jesus is saying infinity times infinity. You never stop forgiving people. why because we're broken we're broken human beings with flaws we're desperate human beings that that need help and so when jesus is answering peter's question he's also talking to us like that time that you feel like you've forgiven that person three times in your heart and then they do it again it's like oh snap that's when you're going to revoke it you know the interesting thing about forgiveness and grace and all these things that we don't deserve that are gifts to us it's like we want forgiveness and grace for ourselves
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