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The Commercial Break

Farewell Furry Tina!

25 Jan 2024

Transcription

Chapter 1: Why is Tina leaving TCB?

0.031 - 13.652 Bryan Green

Like this little guy had a change of heart backing out when they got to the top. I'd rather check myself before I wreck myself. On this episode of the Commercial Break.

0

14.341 - 35.435 Tina

This is the most disgusting, putrid shit I've ever heard, and it doesn't make any sense. Smokey, stop.

0

35.455 - 52.763 Bryan Green

The next episode of The Commercial Break starts now. Cats and kittens, welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green. This is the dear friend of the commercial break, Tina. Tina, best to you. Best to you, Brian.

0

52.783 - 70.79 Tina

And best to you out there in the podcast universe. Tina joining us. Maybe not for one last hurrah, but maybe for one last hurrah as Tina sails off into the sunset, flies the nest. Finally. Yeah, it only took you 43 years, but that's okay. Hey, listen, we all do it at some point. All in due time. All in good time.

0

71.051 - 88.071 Tina

But you have been a friend and a supporter of the show, maybe since episode number one. I don't know. When did you start listening? Episode number one. Good for you. You may be the only other person besides me who's listened to all episodes. I know Chrissy doesn't do it. She only listens every once in a blue moon. How do I know this? It's because she'll text me and she'll be like,

88.051 - 90.334 Tina

oh my God, I was listening to this episode and we're actually pretty funny.

Chapter 2: What are the implications of a legislator attacking the furry community?

90.354 - 91.896 Tina

And I'm like, don't you listen to all the episodes?

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91.916 - 92.858 Christina A.

Yeah, that was like two weeks ago.

0

92.878 - 109.401 Tina

She's like, no, I was in them. I was in them, I know. I only listen for editing purposes, but I even get annoyed at my voice. So what would you think is the biggest change since the first episode through now we're on whatever, way past 400 episodes? Gosh.

0

109.381 - 114.431 Unknown

I don't know if I could pinpoint the biggest one. For sure, the music. I love the tunes.

0

114.511 - 122.507 Tina

Yeah, me too. I can't get rid of them. I think about changing them every season, but then I'm like, why would I? That'd be like Sanford and Sons changing their song.

123.068 - 124.33 Unknown

It makes me happy when I hear it.

124.43 - 131.524 Tina

Yeah. Well, I appreciate the support from the very beginning. Of course. I really do. And you've been a dear friend of mine for decades and decades.

Chapter 3: How do Smokey's lyrics reflect modern relationships?

131.764 - 140.601 Tina

And your love and support for the show is part of what has kept us going. Because certainly, at least at the very beginning, we had no one listening. So we would take any compliment.

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140.741 - 144.569 Unknown

I remember listening to it and texting you, like correcting you.

0
0

144.989 - 147.133 Unknown

And you're like, that was days ago, Tina.

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147.153 - 164.826 Tina

Yeah, that was. Like two weeks ago, Tina, thanks. As if I was on the radio. You're like, oh, no, no, that's not it. People do that to me all the time. I have a friend who does that. Another friend of mine who does that also. She's like, oh, I'm listening to your episode. And by the way, this is incorrect. And I'm like, yeah, I know. I'm always incorrect. I just have a bad brain at actual facts.

164.846 - 168.733 Unknown

Or like you couldn't think of something and I would just hit you with it. And you're like, this has no context. What are you...

168.713 - 188.569 Tina

Are you okay? Did you give me this? Did you say this? I took this as a grand compliment, but someone said they, I think it was you, or maybe it was Allison, I can't remember. They said, you know how I know your show is really good is I listen and I'm in the car and I scream back at you. Like when you say something that's incorrect, I scream at you. I scream back at you.

189.009 - 210.681 Tina

You must do a lot of screaming in that car because I'm not sure I'm correct about anything. But you're moving on to take a new job, and congratulations. I say best to you, my friend. And, you know, we'll keep up with you on this new venture. You're always welcome to call the show, and we'll get you on for certain circumstances. Like the following. I don't understand this. I really don't.

210.901 - 238.886 Tina

I don't understand why certain... political faction in this country. And I would say that that would be extreme conservatives or more far right-leaning folks. Why they are so goddamn hell-bent on these kind of social causes that they take up, you know, just kind of beating on people who may not otherwise... The weakest among us, right? They beat them up. And let me give you an example of this.

Chapter 4: What are the health implications of smoking in today's society?

294.702 - 299.828 Tina

I have yet to see a picture of an eighth grader pissing in a litter box.

0

299.848 - 306.876 Unknown

Can you imagine a school district actually okaying that? I mean, just think about the health and sanitation. Get out of here. It would never happen.

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306.956 - 307.797 Tina

It would never happen.

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307.817 - 311.541 Unknown

It's state-funded, county-funded. It's government-funded. There's never going to happen.

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311.921 - 316.226 Tina

Janitors are not walking in and putting cat litter boxes in there so that people can dress up.

316.246 - 318.769 Unknown

And how damaged do you have to be to believe that could actually be happening?

318.749 - 337.467 Tina

You really have to have some screws fucking loose. You know, I watch like this Channel 5 or some of these, you know, kind of the guys that are calling out some of the hypocrisy on all sides of the fence, right? That's the stuff I like. Yeah, that's the stuff I like too. Like South Park, right? They'll tackle anybody. And I tend to agree with almost everything.

337.447 - 342.835 Tina

Because if there's one thing that I hate, it's not the Republicans or the Democrats or the independents. It's the fucking hypocrisy.

Chapter 5: How does Tina's keto diet influence her Taco Bell choices?

342.915 - 364.928 Tina

That's what I hate. And it happens on all ends of the spectrum. Yep. And this drives me crazy because they're not putting fucking liquor litter boxes in the school. And I highly ever. Yes. And I highly doubt that anybody who chooses to dress as a furry or likes that activity or it's their hobby would take a dump in a litter box at their school because they think that who's thinking that way.

0

364.968 - 366.07 Unknown

Who's doing that one.

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366.05 - 386.818 Tina

No one. There's never been one janitor, not one photograph, not one iota of evidence that anybody has ever put a litter box in a school bathroom because the furries need to use the litter box, first of all. Second of all, if it was to happen that someone took a picture of a litter box in a school, that in and of itself would be the joke. You don't get it. Like, they don't get it.

0

387.199 - 390.103 Tina

These old fucking ass clowns making laws that don't affect anybody.

0

390.123 - 394.889 Unknown

And so what do you mean no furries? Like, Chuck E. Cheese can't come to the school? Like, Smokey the Bear?

395.089 - 398.476 Tina

No furries. No, that's the thing. Slappy the frog, whatever.

Chapter 6: What are the benefits of using a bidet over traditional wiping?

398.556 - 421.804 Tina

Slappy the frog, Smokey the bear, Frosty the fire frog. Do you remember that bit by Mitch Hedberg? That's what I'm referencing. It was my favorite. He was like, I do not understand why they put Smokey the bear as a fire prevention tool. Because I am scared of bears. If I had a fire in the forest, I would run away from a bear, leaving the fire unattended.

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421.985 - 439.583 Tina

However, if I saw a frog, he would settle near me. Maybe he could sit next to me and we could talk about how to properly put out a fire. I don't know. Frosty the fire frog. Mitch Hedberg was so good. I loved him. He was so good. Let's see this. Okay, I'll read this. Do you want me to read this to you? Do it.

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439.603 - 453.887 Tina

A Republican in this state, excuse me, it's the state, not a senator, not a federally funded school, state funded schools. Justin Humphrey, an Oklahoma legislator who once said trans people are mentally ill, is pushing debunked right-wing talking point.

0

453.867 - 469.109 Tina

A Republican legislator in Oklahoma who once said that transgender people have a mental illness introduced a bill this week that would allow animal services to remove students who identify themselves as furries. Did you hear what I just said?

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469.129 - 470.531 Unknown

This doesn't make any sense.

470.551 - 479.543 Tina

Animal services to allow, they would allow animal services to remove students who identify as furries. What in the good fuck?

479.743 - 485.912 Unknown

He doesn't even know what a furry is then because the kid is not identified. You don't identify as a furry.

485.992 - 487.595 Tina

You dress up like a furry. That's right.

487.655 - 492.962 Unknown

They like to dress up. That's like saying a clown is a different animal or something. This doesn't make any sense to me.

Chapter 7: How does age affect partying norms and expectations?

580.562 - 592.671 Tina

Double. dog dare you to do that and see how well it goes for you, Justin. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So, and I just don't understand why they take up these social causes that obviously go nowhere. It's like the abortion thing.

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592.691 - 595.979 Unknown

He created one. That's not even a social cause, right?

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595.999 - 598.725 Tina

I mean, no one is asking for furries to be removed from schools.

0

598.705 - 603.956 Unknown

And no one's saying we don't want them here. Furries are the funnest, sweetest. They are. They'll dress up.

0

604.176 - 607.042 Tina

My kid's got a little bear hat. Yes. One of my kids has a little bear hat.

607.062 - 616.58 Unknown

My niece and my nephew, yeah. They look so fucking cute in them. It's so cute. They wear it to school every day. And they're not telling you they're a panda bear or an Ewok. You know, they're just like, look at my hat.

616.841 - 623.432 Tina

I think these people take up these causes because they believe that it's going to bring them press, right? I think that's one of the reasons.

623.452 - 624.013 Unknown

Well, it worked.

624.373 - 626.056 Tina

It worked. It brought him press.

Chapter 8: What are the humorous aspects of discussing bodily functions?

809.372 - 826.594 Tina

They were, oh, they were commuting together to work because they worked in the same area of town. And the grandparents, her grandparents knew about this the whole time because they had not only had the mother confessed to her mother that she was sleeping with her daughters. Yeah, with her son-in-law.

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827.035 - 843.499 Tina

But then apparently they had walked in a few times, caught them holding hands or in otherwise compromising positions. And the grandparents never said anything to their granddaughter. And so I was like, holy shit, this is a crazy story if you really think about this. Like, you're sleeping with your mother-in-law. That's insane.

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843.519 - 845.622 Unknown

That's mommy issues to the nth degree.

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845.642 - 863.19 Tina

Oh, I mean, what kind of family drama? And so, but that article then had links to Reddit posts that then had links to other Reddit posts. I must have read 30 different posts, various places in the internet, where people were either confessing that they had done this,

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863.17 - 887.355 Tina

or were saying that this had been done to them like they their significant other had slept with their in-laws we talked about it you talked about it on one early episode with the the party remember and the mom like put the boy to bed oh yeah that's right but that was they didn't actually they weren't in there no they did they slept together but that was a teacher oh remember the teacher was at the party wasn't a teacher that was at the party

887.572 - 898.869 Unknown

No, the mom didn't like the boy that her daughter was marrying. And at the engagement party, they were wealthy. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. She put him in bed and took a compromising position. Nothing happened, but the daughter thought it did.

898.889 - 899.85 Tina

The daughter thought it did.

899.871 - 916.836 Unknown

Because this happens frequently. There's a couple of TV shows. Did you watch Obsession? It has to be frequently running through our culture because this TV show Obsession, very hot, by the way, but that's what it is. The girl is being introduced to her future husband's family, and she starts having an affair with his dad.

917.204 - 917.625 Tina

No.

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