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Chapter 1: Why does Bryan get confused by captain announcements?
On this episode of the Commercial Break.
This is Captain Ken. I'm going to go ahead and turn the seatbelt sign off. I'm going to go ahead and use the bathroom as long as we use it quickly. Let's keep ourselves strapped in otherwise.
Chapter 2: What humorous suggestions does Bryan have for improving intercom systems?
We're currently number 57 for takeoff. So I think there's a couple extra minutes built in here. Atlanta, 85 degrees. When we get there, we're going to be at Gate T. We'll have your baggage at 7. We're going to let the crew. It's going to take good care of you back there. Just sit back, relax. We'll have you back to Atlanta just as soon as we can. I'll keep you updated when I get an update.
Okay, thanks.
Chapter 3: How does weather impact flight schedules according to Bryan?
The next episode of The Commercial Break starts now.
Oh, yeah, cats and kittens. Welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green. This is my dear friend and the co-host of this show, Chris and Joy Hoadley. Best to you, Chris. Best to you out there in the podcast universe. How the hell are you? I'm just going to take that earphone out. It's fucking with my head.
Chapter 4: What are Bryan's thoughts on the drama surrounding weather forecasts?
Can you hear you now? Hello. No, I liked it better when I couldn't hear you. Best of you, goodness. You had me on mute. I had you on mute. Well, you're in my left ear, so I had to mute you.
I can't hear you.
I wanted the stereo. I want to not be able to hear you in stereo.
Chapter 5: What challenges did Bryan face with his pool maintenance?
Let's see if I can put this back in and it makes a little bit of a difference. Eh, whatever. Who cares? It's just a lot of bass coming through my left ear, so it sounds like I'm nasally or not clear. Whatever. No one cares. Welcome to the commercial break. Welcome, welcome, welcome. How is everybody? We're building an ark over here.
I'm shocking and awing the pool, and we're building an ark in the backyard getting ready for Tropical Storm Arthur, which is currently closing down the city. Right. I feel like this is a snowstorm with rain. Do you know what I'm saying? Exactly.
Chapter 6: How does Bryan describe his experience with his children after pool mishaps?
Now everything's shutting down.
Yeah.
It's all bullshit. I was thinking about this yesterday or this morning when I got these all these, you know, weather warnings and notifications. I thought to myself that no one does drama no better than the weather people. Do you know what I'm saying? That's true. They're always telling you how bad it's going to be and five plus inches of rain and trees down and, you know, travel disrupted.
And it never, ever happens. Never. Not once. It never happens. We had like six snowstorm warnings this last winter and not one time. Well, one time. Once. Some people got some snow. It didn't include me or anybody I know. Yeah. Fuck you, weather people. AccuWeather my ass. BackuWeather is more like it. FackuWeather. FackuWeather is what it is. It's going to fuck with my pool.
I was going to say, how is the pool?
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Chapter 7: What are the highlights of the new shows Bryan is watching?
The pool's great, man. I did it. Okay, you did do it. Yes, I did it, and I ruined my children's eyesight for life in the process. Anybody who's been tuned into the commercial break knows that this has just basically turned into a saga about my pool for the last two months. And I finally licked it. I licked the algae. Scraping and brushing and pool robot.
You had like a super bloom or something, right?
I had a mustard bloom in there. Oh, my God. Yeah, which is about as lovely as it sounds. It went from green to yellow, and that's the stuff that really sticks on. There's this greenish yellow. It can really get nasty. And it got nasty. And as soon as we got back from Spain, when the sun came up, I looked and I said, oh, shit, I'm in trouble. And I must have dumped... 40 gallons.
40 gallons of shock in there. Excuse me, 40 cups, 40 pounds of shock into that pool, Chrissy. Day after day, hour after hour. I was doing it every four hours. And I had the new vacuum that was a polo robot that was doing the work. And then I have to scrub the side of the walls to scrape off the dead algae.
Chapter 8: What insights does Bryan share about the current state of reality TV?
A whole process.
Yeah.
Jeez.
Fuck, man.
But now that you've done it, I mean, we were talking before, like, you know, how do people know how to do the pool? Is there a school somewhere or whatever? You could now do some online training courses.
The funny thing is, is that Lance, Starbucks' boyfriend, his daughter has a new house. They have a pool. They woke up one morning. It was the same color as my pool.
Mm-hmm.
And the pool guys kept telling him, oh, it's a metal stain. The water is metal stained. And I'm like, nah, that's not metal stain. You got to shock the pool. Go to the pool store and buy 50 pounds of shock and just pour it in there. Whatever ails you, chlorine, crystallized bleach. That's what it is. You know what they're doing to that reflection pool up in Washington, D.C.?
They're pouring bleach in there. That's chlorine. That's what it is. They're trying to do the same thing I did. So if Trump's, you know... Best pool guy ever, Bitcoin, is up there pouring bleach in their pool. I can pour bleach in my pool. That's what happened. I bleached the shit out of it, and it was awesome. Like, last... Friday night, I couldn't see the stains anymore.
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