Say No-No To Day-Blow
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What life lessons does Bryan's dad share about festival season?
I have a special talent I want to share with you. I'm a turkey gobbling champion.
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He wouldn't show up until 9.45 because D knew that if I got it too early, then I'd just be calling him all day long. He didn't want to bother with that.
He knew how things worked.
He knew how things worked. I know how things work. You know how things work. But these youth of today, the youths don't know yet. They're following some bald guy with a neck tattoo around looking for Dave Love.
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Welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green. This is our friendly foot fetish finder, Kristen Joy. Totally best to you, Kristen.
Best to you, Brian.
Best to you out there in the podcast universe. Thanks for joining us.
You're welcome.
Oh, hey. Oh, you're there.
Hey.
Hi.
Hi. Had an interesting weekend. Yes, you did. I did. Yes. I broke free. I broke loose of the chains that bind me, Chrissy. You got out into the world. Yes. For 190 minutes, I was free. You know, it's festival season for everybody, I'm sure. But for here in Atlanta, there's we have if you've never been to Atlanta, Atlanta is a bunch of disparate little townships and areas that all have their own flavor and style. And I'm sure not unlike a lot of other big cities. Right. But in Atlanta, it really is pockmarked by all these little, you know, pockets of coolness or interest, you know, interesting things that they're known for. And so everyone has their own festivals. Everyone. There's like 300 different festivals going on at any given time in the city of Atlanta during the springtime.
And all of them have started to up their game. It used to be that you'd have like, you know, a Jason Fartin knife set. While you were drinking some shitty swill that the local brewery put together, right? Right. But now they've all upped their game. They've got budgets. They're taking tax dollars, big tax dollars, to get these kind of, I don't want to call them has-been acts, but let's call them... Legacy. Legacy acts. Yes, thank you. That's a nice way of saying way past their prime acts that cater to a certain age group. And that age group is my age group. It's... guys and girls with kids, right? So they figure out, bring the kids on down. We'll throw a little carnival where your little one can break its neck and be, you know, life flighted to the local hospital.
We'll have some local swill there that you can drink, probably warm. We'll probably run out of it halfway through the day. And then you'll have to, you know, bring your own booze. And then we'll put a big stage out there in the middle of a field and we'll throw some act in there that, you know, tickles your nostalgic fancy.
Exactly. Yep.
So the first of those that I intend to attend, I intend to attend, was the big cherry blossom festival here in Atlanta.
Right, right. That's a big one.
Yeah, I don't know if it's a big one. It's a one. And I don't know if this part of Atlanta is known for cherry blossoms or what the fuck.
I see them all over the place.
I see them all over the place too, but that doesn't make this particular part of town have a corner of the market on cherry blossoms. The fuck is going on? Anyway, okay. So cherry blossom, get the lineup.
Or the cherry blossoms in bloom.
I didn't see a fucking cherry blossom anywhere. It was freezing cold, wind whipping down my dick. I mean, it was like really, it was not, the sun was out. It looked like a pretty day, but it didn't feel like a pretty day. It was one of those off days for the second Atlanta fake spring that we're going through right now.
Well, and part of that is that there was a huge snowstorm up north.
Oh, yeah. I heard about that.
Minneapolis got eight inches.
I know.
How does Bryan's fatherly instinct manifest during the festival?
Over the weekend. It's crazy. The weather is just nuts. But I think the weather has always been nuts. I just get older and it's something that I like to fascinate about. You know, when I was young, I didn't have time to think about the weather because I had other things on my mind, like, you know, chasing girls or doing drugs or, you know, avoiding police detection or something like that.
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