Episode #707: Bryan watched the Oscars, Krissy did not! The Oscars continue to be a snooze fest despite Conan's best efforts. Adrian Brody best his own persona record for longest (and worst) acceptance speech in history. While the producers of the Oscars forgot to make it interesting. Then, Bryan and Krissy decide to get into the drink business with TCB Coolers. Finally, Bryan has a run in with a few ornery tree guys and he runs away. Rev down everyone. Rev down! The Oscars 2025 recap Conan O’Brien doesn’t age A snooze fest Bryan’s favorite pastime: identifying when artists are lipsyncing Is Demi Moore a “popcorn actress”? TCB Merch coming soon The Commercial Break dabbles into the drink industry with the TCB Coolers Measles outbreak Bryan’s carpool incident Watch episode #707 on Youtube Text us or leave us a voicemail: +1 (212) 433-3TCB FOLLOW US: Instagram: @thecommercialbreak Youtube: youtube.com/thecommercialbreak TikTok: @tcbpodcast Website: www.tcbpodcast.com CREDITS: Hosts: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley Executive Producer: Bryan Green Producer: Astrid B. Green Voice Over: Rachel McGrath To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Chapter 1: What is the health update from Crabapple?
And welcome back to WSHIT's evening news. It's news you can use before you snooze. WSHIT, lean and mean and first on the scene. An update on the continuing health care from Donna's Dairy Depot and Delicatessen. With over 137 people now affected by the ongoing dysentery virus found in the milk and cheese buffet, authorities have yet to stop the spread of the illness.
With almost all FDA employees now unemployed, Crabapple continues to see its residents fall ill with symptoms ranging from violent vomiting and fever to explosive diarrhea and tooth loss. The head of Crabapple's health department, recent RFK Jr. appointee Dr. Herfin Skolko, held a press conference to address the community and give his advice on the extreme symptoms.
Let's listen now to what the doctor had to say to the residents experiencing gastrointestinal issues.
A flame is going to come out because it will be on fire and nobody will ever stick a penis in your butthole again.
And Dr. Skokal also added that residents should take their daily dose of colloidal silver. And we wish all the best to our anally challenged friends. We'll be back after this commercial break.
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Chapter 2: How did Bryan and Krissy plan their TCB merch?
On this episode of the Commercial Break.
Listen, if we were in the wine cooler business, that's where it's at. We're going to do a merch drop. I'm not even going to say when because then it will never happen. But we're going to do a merch drop and like Astor and I are talking about it. And now I'm thinking wine coolers. Why not? Wine coolers. Let's drop wine coolers and then some weird hangover remedy made of beet juice.
Beet juice and colloidal silver.
I like it.
Maybe we should mix our wine cooler with our hangover remedy. Wow, tasty. The drink that gets you sober.
The next episode of The Commercial Break starts now.
Oh, yeah, cats and kittens. Welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green. This is the Mikey to my more Chris and Joy Hoadley. Best to you, Chris. Best to you, Brian.
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Chapter 3: Did Conan O'Brien make the Oscars interesting?
Best to you out there in the podcast universe. Thanks for joining us. Did you watch the Oscars? We haven't had a chance to talk about it because this is our first episode since the Oscars appeared. Did you watch the Oscars?
I watched a little of it.
The Oscars?
No, I did not watch the whole thing.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Doing that Conan thing where he takes his hip and he moves it back and forth. You don't know the Conan thing? Yeah. He takes his hip, he moves it back and forth with a string.
I love that.
Yeah, okay. All right, so Conan did the Oscars. I think, you know, he did a job. He did just fine. Conan did just fine. He was a steady hand on the ship. He did a great... I think, intro monologue. He did a good job without offending too many people. He was really funny. I liked the bit with John Lithgow. You know, Conan is a good host. He's done this for a long time.
He did whatever it was, 26 years, 30 years of late night television. So he certainly knows how to work a crowd. He knows how to be in front of a crowd, how to deliver a monologue, how to be funny. He's got a team of writers.
He kind of never ages now that I think about it.
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Chapter 4: Was there lip-syncing at the Oscars 2025?
You remember that?
Yeah, that made me... I was never the biggest Jay Leno fan, but that kind of sealed it for me. I was like, that's a really shitty thing to do to your quote-unquote friend. But I don't think Jay Leno's friends with anybody. I think Jay Leno's friends with Jay Leno. Do you know what I'm saying?
Yeah, and his cars. Yeah.
So I say all this to say that I think Conan is uniquely suited, like Jimmy Kimmel, to handle the Oscars or something like the Oscars, an award show that really needs someone who can bounce it along, keep it on time, tell jokes in between, improv when necessary, when he sees things happening, do it on the fly and move to the next one.
But it doesn't matter because the Oscars is a snore fest no matter what.
It kind of seems like that. That's why I didn't really tune in. I saw when Ben Stiller came up and went like halfway up or something. He was introducing some category.
Oh, he was? I must have taken a pee break during that because I think I watched most of it, but I don't remember Ben Stiller.
Yeah, he came on. He was introducing something.
Speaking of Ben Stiller, Ben Stiller's show Severance has now become the most watched streamed television show ever. Something like, you know, 539 million minutes of streaming watched or something. So 97% Rotten Tomatoes score. A lot of people don't like it, but I do. I think it's very good.
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Chapter 5: Why is Demi Moore considered a 'popcorn actress'?
I'm just sharing with you that that's what I observed. I observed that she was lip-syncing during Somewhere Over the Rainbow and not during Defying Gravity. So Cynthia comes out. It's mainly a Cynthia song, that Defying Gravity. There's a few lines for Ariana. She fucking nailed it. I mean, 100% chills up your spine, nailed that song, every note of it.
And that to me, I'm convinced she's that girl has got a voice. Such a tiny little frame and such a huge voice comes out of it. I will share. Well, no, I'm not going to share that because then I'm going to get to comments and stuff like that. Brian, should you?
This is one of those moments where Brian goes, should you or will you regret this 10 days from now when you have a list of text messages beating you up about what you just said? Okay, I'm not going to share it. Never mind. You make your own judgment calls. But Cynthia has an amazing voice. She brought the house down. Everybody's standing up.
And I thought to myself, okay, this is a great start to the Oscars. Let's keep it going as my children are screaming. My children are doing their own version of Defying Gravity in the background.
They're practicing.
But then, honestly, it just became a snooze fest. It was, you know, award after award. The presentation style was not particularly interesting. Conan did not... He was not on camera enough, I think, to make a super impact on what happened. He showed up for a few seconds, made a one-liner, and then went away, introducing the next people who were introducing... The next category.
And that, the way that they did it this year, for those of you that didn't watch, and most of you didn't watch, apparently due to the, because I looked at the ratings, they, five people, best cinematography, five people nominated, five people came out on stage, and then they would talk a little bit about that cinematographer. Hmm.
but they wouldn't show the work that they were talking about enough for you to get an idea of what they actually did. That's right. So how the fuck am I supposed to make a snap judgment about who's supposed to win? Isn't that the fun of the award shows is like, I have no fucking clue what they're talking about.
I didn't see the movie, but if you show me 15 seconds of the cinematography work, then maybe I can make a snap judgment and be a Monday morning quarterback. That's what we all
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Chapter 6: What happened with Adrian Brody's acceptance speech?
Okay.
I mean, I really enjoyed that.
Here's my take, and you tell me. That... Substance is, in some ways, a... It's grotesque and weird movie. It's a weird character that Demi Moore is playing. It's not like a traditional Oscar winning role. It's not a traditional Oscar winning movie. But it was a very good movie. And she was very good in it. But I think the Academy, who is now a little bit younger in age, right?
They've kind of changed a number of years ago. They kind of, you know, put out the old and brought in the new. that maybe that particular performance is a hard one to move, like to check the box of. And they go, oh, well, Mikey was really good. My opinion is that Demi Moore's role that she played was maybe not like an Oscar type of, it's not a traditional Oscar movie.
It's a weird French film about people crawling out of their skin. Isn't that essentially what it is? No. Isn't it about a substance that she takes?
Well, yeah, it's I mean, for me, it was more about like the take on Hollywood and are just women in general, like aging and how if you had the opportunity to go back to being like a younger woman. self of you, would you? And so you take this pill, this substance. And then through that, there is a younger self that is born out of her body.
And so that's the grotesque part is when you see the younger girl coming out.
Coming out of her body, right? It's like crawling out of her own skin, right? So, but let me ask you this, like you saw a Nora and you saw a substance, which one was the more Which one was, in your opinion, was the better performance?
I mean, the substance was more of like a shocking, you know.
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Chapter 7: How did the Oscars 2025 end for Bryan and Krissy?
to directors but I guess the best directors in the world are the ones that really take control of every single bit of it and listen I haven't met a Quentin Tarantino movie that I don't like exactly and I gotta say that he is just such a cool cat like he comes out on stage and he's talking to people Is he talking to the crowd as if it was one person at a bar and you guys were best friends? Yeah.
You get the sense that Quentin Tarantino is cool in any situation. And I don't care how old the guy is. I think he's always going to be that way. He's just one of those cool cats. He came out. He did Best Director.
Yeah, it's just him.
I just wanted to share that Quentin Tarantino coming on the Oscars made it just a little bit more interesting than it otherwise would be. Morgan Freeman showed up to talk about his friend Gene Hackman, who had just passed away.
Yeah, I did see that.
Under extraordinarily strange circumstances. Extraordinarily strange circumstances.
Well, I don't know. I mean, I guess we're going to find out what happened. But it seems like, and I've talked about it with a couple of different people, it seems like maybe, I mean, Gene Hackman was 95, right?
And in failing health, according to some people.
It seems like maybe he died, and then the wife maybe committed suicide with the pills. And then there happened to be a dog that was in the kennel, and it died, too, of starvation.
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