It’s Good That You’re Having Trouble | On Handling Haters
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Why does the episode start by emphasizing Stoic virtues like courage and wisdom?
Welcome to the Daily Stoic Podcast, designed to help bring those four key Stoic virtues, courage, discipline, justice, and wisdom into the real world. It's good that you're having trouble. It's happened to all of us. Somebody recommended a book and we started it, but we got discouraged. We finished it and still have no idea what we read. Maybe this was your exact reaction to one of the Stoics, to Epictetus or to Seneca. Is there something wrong with you? What happened? What happened is exactly what's supposed to happen. Nobody said books would be easy. Nobody said that getting wiser, better, or stronger would be accomplished without hard work. In fact, the Stoics specifically said the opposite. Instead of feeling down on ourselves for struggling with something, we should be proud because it means we were reaching, means we were pushing ourselves.
Just as we get stronger by lifting heavier things than we're used to, the way to get wiser is to read books that are above our level and keep at it.
How does Ryan Holiday explain that struggling with difficult books is a sign of growth?
If you accomplish something good with hard work, Musonius Rufus tells us, the labor passes quickly, but the good endures. And we know this through our study of Stoicism. Epictetus is tougher to read than Marcus. Musonius Rufus is tougher to read and understand than Epictetus. It doesn't mean we don't study them. It just means we spend a little more time with them, a little more time working through each idea. Reading to lead, to get better, to be a better thinker, a better parent, a better creative, a better professional, better person or writer requires challenging ourselves. It requires reading books that push us out of our comfort zones, that expose us to new perspectives, new ways of thinking, facts and ideas and inspiration we haven't experienced with or learned before.
And it requires that we not only take these things in, but we absorb them and use them. We have to understand what we're reading, what it means, so we can put it into action. And that's what we're doing in the Daily Stoic Read to Lead Challenge. Whether you want to understand a classic that you just didn't get or take more away from self-improvement books, you want to employ ideas from history, you want to be able to read more, this challenge will help you do that. Over the next six weeks, me and thousands of soaps all over the world, we're going to walk through how to be a better reader. I hope you find books that are worth your time, how to work through things, how to retain what matters.
What is the Daily Stoic “Read to Lead” challenge and how can listeners join?
If you sign up by September 22nd, you can join the live Q&A with me and thousands of other Stoics all over the world in the Read to Lead challenge. You can sign up right now at dailystoic.com slash read to lead. And remember, if you join Daily Stoic Life, you get this challenge and all our challenges for free. That's dailystoiclife.com.
on handling haters. This is from the Daily Stoic Journal, 366 days of writing and reflection on the art of living by yours truly and my wonderful collaborator, Steven Hanselman, who I also worked on the Daily Stoic with. Today's entry, the Stoics taught that kindness trumps hate. They believed that those who engage in hate are prisoners to a destructive passion, one that hurts the practitioner, not the intended target. There's no reason to hate a hater. They're already suffering enough. In fact, when we see them this way, it makes it easier to be kind, good-natured, genuine, and useful. Remember that line in the Bible about how loving your enemies is like pouring hot coals on them? because it's so unexpected.
What can surprise you that way? Whose enmity can you meet with kindness and compassion?
Why does the host say kindness should trump hate when dealing with online trolls?
And how much better do you feel when you've done so? You know, this is something I've struggled with a bit recently, just having watched my stuff on social media get attacked Sometimes I have fun with it. Sometimes I like to stir it up a bit. I try not to get angry about it. It's not something that makes me angry, but there is a part of it that makes me really sad, really frustrated, because it's not that I can't take it.
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Chapters
7 chapters
1
Why does the episode start by emphasizing Stoic virtues like courage and wisdom?
0:00–1:04
2
How does Ryan Holiday explain that struggling with difficult books is a sign of growth?
1:04–2:30
3
What is the Daily Stoic “Read to Lead” challenge and how can listeners join?
2:30–3:51
4
Why does the host say kindness should trump hate when dealing with online trolls?
3:51–4:51
5
What does Marcus Aurelius advise about responding to people who despise or hate you?
4:51–5:48
6
How does the Jeff Bezos story illustrate the difference between cleverness and kindness?
5:48–6:54
7
What final Stoic strategies are offered for staying calm and wise when facing haters?
6:54–7:42
Speakers
1 identifiedMore from The Daily Stoic
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