Chapter 1: What did the wife discover about her husband's use of an AI chatbot?
I found out my husband was using a anime chat bot to discuss his sexual fantasies.
Does it create a character, too, that talks back to him?
Yeah.
And that character will do whatever he types in that bot?
Yeah.
Yeah. what's going on what's going on this is john with the dr john deloney show taking your calls on your mental and emotional health your relationships your marriage your kids whatever you got going on in your life we got relationships just hanging on by a thread all over the planet and Relationships are what keep us all tethered together.
And so, I mean, I am invested with all I got to helping people reconnect, deepen connections, get stronger again. And I've been doing this for two decades, sitting with hurting people, trying to figure out what do I do now? What's the next right move? So if you wanna be on the show, go to johndeloney.com slash ask. It's an honor to get to sit with you. It's one of my life's greatest blessings.
And for everybody who's brave and honest on this show, I'm really grateful.
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Chapter 2: How does the wife feel about her husband's sexual fantasies with an AI?
Let's go out to Salt Lake City, Utah, and talk to Morgan. What's up, Morgan? How we doing?
Hi, Dr. John. Thanks for having me on.
You got it. It's good to hear from you. What's going on?
Oh, I'm pretty nervous. So I'll just cut to it, I guess.
Cannonball, yeah. Tuck those knees in and jump all the way off the high dive. We can do it.
Okay. Um, so I think it was about two weeks ago.
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Chapter 3: What impact does the husband's use of AI have on their marriage?
Do me a favor. Do me a favor. Um, take your hands. I want you to squeeze them together as tight as you can. Okay. Make really big balled up fists. Okay. Three, two, and then let them loose.
Whew.
Okay? And then take a huge, deep breath, as deep as you can, all the way in your tummy and in your chest. And hold it in five, four, three, two, exhale. You're safe here, ma'am.
Okay.
You're good.
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Chapter 4: What challenges does the wife face in addressing her husband's behavior?
Okay, so I would say about two weeks ago, I found out my husband was using an AI chatbot to discuss his sexual fantasies. And, I mean, he's been kind of working through an addiction to a type of pornography for a while. And anyway, this is just, I don't know. I feel like it was a new level of betrayal. Yeah. And I don't know. I just needed to talk to somebody about it.
Thank you for calling.
Nobody really knows.
Okay. Thank you for calling. What did you find?
What do you mean?
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Chapter 5: How does the conversation shift to the issue of a mother slapping her daughter's boyfriend?
I can hear in your voice that you didn't find him just texting Jet Chat GPT back and forth with some
run-of-the-mill sex stuff it sounds like you walked in on or read some things or saw some things that were pretty troubling yeah um he really likes anime and you know he he and I are both um we're both raised religiously and so like generally he'd
does his best to steer clear of anime that is sexual because he knows that he gets triggered but then anyway so it's it's basically an anime chatbot and you know it's like they're having a conversation and it's supposed to be erotic and
Does it create a character too that talks back to him?
Yeah.
Yeah. And that character will do whatever he types in that box?
Yep.
Yeah. And will cheer him on as he masturbates or as he does what he's going to do on his side?
Yeah. Yeah.
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Chapter 6: What advice does the host give about handling conflict in relationships?
And to also be looking yourself in the mirror in the morning wondering, why is a fictitious cartoon robot more appealing than me?
Yeah.
All of it. I'm sorry. How long have y'all been together?
We're coming up on nine years.
You all got kids?
We have three kids.
How old are they?
We have a six-year-old and a four-year-old and a two-year-old.
Oh, man. You're a pretty chaotic house, huh?
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Chapter 7: How does the discussion transition to the topic of a man feeling unsupported during pregnancy?
He works full-time. I just recently started up a side hustle because one of our main goals together is trying to buy a house so that we can establish roots.
Yeah. And that's a nightmare these days, trying to save up for a house. Good grief. Especially in Salt Lake City.
Yeah.
Um, tell me about the past conversations and experiences he's had with pornography.
Um, so he, before we even got married, he, disclosed to me that he struggled as a teenager with masturbation. He didn't really get into pornography until after we were married. And that's one of the things I was very thankful and still am. He's very open with me. He's honest with me and he will come to me and tell me when he's
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Chapter 8: What strategies are suggested for managing stress during pregnancy?
looked things up that he shouldn't have or when he's masturbated or... So I really... That was one thing I really appreciate is that he's so open with me about it instead of trying to hide it.
Yeah. There's some... That can be good, but after 10 years together, the constant disclosure without any changes in actions or behavior... can leave you carrying a ton of, for lack of better words, it's like he has this thing that violates his core values. Yeah. And violates the values that you two have established for your marriage.
And then he comes to you openly and just has a cinder block and says, well, I did this thing that violates what we agreed on. Here, you carry this. I'm gonna go back. And then nothing changes. And then a few months later or a year later or two weeks later, he pops back up and says, ah, did it again. Carry this. And it's almost like you're so burdened carrying all this stuff.
You're trying to figure out how does this align with a guy who's like provides for the family. Maybe he's a good dad. He's present with these three little kids, whatever. And so you have to say things like, well, at least he's not doing this. And at least this isn't happening. And it's almost a way that you can excuse all of this insane weight you're carrying.
So I guess at the beginning of this call, I want you to at least exhale. And if you can close your eyes for two seconds and just imagine yourself dropping all of those bricks and cinder blocks, set them down. And then you have to sit there and look at this guy who says he's one thing, who in some areas of his life acts a certain way. Is he a good dad? Does he show up?
He's an amazing dad.
Is he a good husband? Outside of the fact that he keeps outsourcing feelings and eroticism and play and fantasies to like pornography and now to an escalate, basically a live pornography, right?
Yeah. I mean, yeah. Literally, other than the pornography and masturbation, he's my best friend. We love hanging out and shooting the breeze. I don't know. We're really good together, other than that.
So let me say this. My best friends in the world... Don't violate the core value agreements we have with each other. It's not what best friends do.
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