My Wife Had an Affair Because She Doesn’t Find Me Attractive
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How can I save my marriage after an affair?
I'm trying to save my marriage after finding out that my wife had a three-month affair with her boss. Oh, man. And I don't know what to do. My wife has been dealing with a lack of attraction towards me. She says that I am overwhelming in my desire. Why do you want to save this marriage?
Who is Dr. John Delony and what is this show about?
What in the world's going on? This is John with the Dr. John Deloney Show. talking to you about your mental and emotional health and your relationships and your marriage and your kids, whatever you got going on in your life. And you tried to Google it and you tried to chat GPT it and you just went, what? I just need someone to sit down with me and listen to me. And that's the promise on this show. I'll sit with you and we'll figure out what's your next right step. All of us have chaotic lives. Not everybody's got somebody they can just sit down with. And that's what this show is all about. You want to be on the show? Give me a buzz at 1-844-693-3291 or go to johndeloney.com slash ask and check this out. This upcoming fall, my favorite event I'm a part of.
We just did the Valentine's Day weekend and it was off the hook. It's my favorite event that I'm a part of. It's called the Money and Marriage Getaway. It's a weekend retreat here in Nashville, Tennessee. It's a marriage retreat. Y'all get on the planes, on the buses, on the, on the planes, trains, and automobiles get to Nashville. It's a weekend with me and my buddy, Rachel Cruz, and a couple of special guests that we bring in because Nashville is kind of a rad city for that. And listen, three days of laughter, hard conversations, often some tears, intentional time together, lots of practical teaching. And the best part about it is if you leave the money marriage retreat without your question answered, we cap it to just 600 couples or so. Um, If you leave without your question answered, that's on you. The whole purpose is getting access. You can listen to the show. You can read blog articles. You can read my books.
This event is about being able to look me in the eye and say, okay, but yeah, what about my situation? And we're going to get your questions answered. Join us November 6th through 8th, 2025. You can go to ramseysolutions.com slash events. Get them quick. It sells out all the time. We've already sold a huge chunk of tickets for next fall. Get on it, get on it, get on it. All right, let's go out to Jackson, Wyoming, one of my favorite places in the world, and talk to Ryan. Hey, Ryan, what's up? Hey, John, how are you? Doing all right, brother. How about you? I've been a lot better. Let me know what's up.
I'm trying to save my marriage after finding out that my wife had a three-month affair with her boss. Oh, man. And I don't know what to do.
What should I do if my partner does not find me attractive?
I'm sorry that happened, man.
You too.
Have you said that out loud before?
Yeah. I've told a couple of close friends.
How'd that go?
Um, it went well. They're supportive. I don't think they fully understand why I want to try to save it.
Um, so I want to, I want to start the conversation this way and then we'll dig into what happened. Um, You can only save your part of it. And she might not want to save it. And I think sometimes after somebody cheats on us, we think that we, it's all our fault. And so we need to do a bunch of stuff differently. infidelity almost never happens in a vacuum, right? I don't like to use the word fault, but there's usually a world that's created between two people. Not always, but often. So you can, quote unquote, try to work on your part, but I don't want you to think you're a personal failure if this thing doesn't get held together because you don't want to hold it together.
I've been more okay with that lately. Good, awesome. I think I've gotten to the point where I am I know I'm going to be okay if this ends.
Um, what's okay to not be okay. Right.
Oh yeah. That would take time. There you go. There you go.
All right. So what happened? Tell me what happened.
Um, over the past year or so, uh, we've been married about three years now. And this last year has been really hard dealing with, um, my wife has been dealing with a lack of attraction towards me over the last year.
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Chapters
6 chapters
1
How can I save my marriage after an affair?
0:05–0:29
2
Who is Dr. John Delony and what is this show about?
0:29–2:56
3
What should I do if my partner does not find me attractive?
2:56–7:43
4
How can therapy help rebuild my relationship?
7:43–15:20
5
Should I pursue a relationship with my deceased friend's spouse?
15:20–22:00
6
What steps should I take when starting a new relationship?
22:00–58:55