My Wife Refuses to Take My Last Name
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What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
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She didn't take my last name when we got married. Now we're expecting our first kid. And I've tried to have the conversation with her about like, hey, just her last name. And she's like, well, I really want to maintain my name with like the political climate, this, that and the other. Like there's some like voting things that she's concerned about if she has to change her last name.
What?
what up what up this is john with dr john deloney's show welcome back welcome for your first time however you showed up here however long you've been here i'm glad you're here talking about your mental and emotional health your well-being your relationships your marriages your kids whatever you got going on pull up a seat and we're gonna figure out what's the next right move if you want to be on the show I don't answer questions and things on social media. I answer them live. Real people talking to other real people. Click the link in the show notes if you want to be on the show, and it will get you here. All right, let's go to Glenn in Dubois, Pennsylvania. Hey, Glenn, what's up?
Hey, Dr. John, how you doing?
I'm good, my man. What's up, dude?
Why does the wife refuse to take her husband's last name?
Um, so I don't know how to really have this conversation with my wife. We've tried to have it a few times over, um, where like, so she didn't take my last name when we got married. Um, we kind of agreed to that beforehand that we were like, Hey, um, she's trying to get into law school. So until she gets to law school, cause she got her bachelor's before we were married, just so that everything carried over with her maiden name. And then she said, once I get into law school, I'll change my name. And then she got into law school and it hasn't happened. We're going on two years into law school, hasn't happened. And now we're expecting our first kid. And I've tried to have the conversation with her about like, Hey, just her last name.
And she's like, well, I really want to maintain my name with like the political climate, this, that, and the other. Like there's some like voting things that she's concerned about. If she has to change her last name, she'll lose out on rights is her concern that way. But, I'm not sure how to address really focusing on the, uh, our child because it's our first kid is coming. Like, how do I have the conversation with her? Hold on.
Don't put this on your kid. This is, this is in your chest. Okay. Like your, your kid is surfacing an issue, but let's don't, let's don't make it the kid's fault. Let's own it between you, between you and her. Y'all made an agreement and she broke the agreement.
And she says she didn't. She's like, I never promised that.
How does a husband handle his wife's depression?
But... What political stuff is she talking about?
She... There's rumors on the right about, hey, when you go to vote, your birth certificate has to match your ID. And if you've been married, your ID no longer matches your birth certificate because you changed your name when you got married. And so... So the people on the left are saying that, hey, they're trying to take away women's rights to vote. And so I'm not going to make that argument at this point. I've kind of let that ship sail at this point, but I'm not sure how to. like address that with like, Hey, our kid's about to come into the world. Our first baby, are we giving her my last name? Are we giving her your last, or what are we doing? Cause like, I'm already getting the side eye from people that find out that she has a different last name than me.
And we've been married for five years. Yeah. Like, I don't know where to go with that with our own kid. Like it, like, does my name not worth that? You know, she's, she's sticking to her family's maiden name. And I'm like, well, What about my name carrying on? Yeah.
What does she say?
I'm so sick of both political camps being so insane.
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
0:05–1:30
2
Why does the wife refuse to take her husband's last name?
1:30–2:56
3
How does a husband handle his wife's depression?
2:56–8:31
4
What happens when a wife feels excluded from a major medical decision?
8:31–11:30
5
How can couples effectively communicate about sensitive topics?
11:30–18:16
6
What are practical steps for improving marital connection?
18:16–30:30
7
How can a husband address feelings of disconnection?
30:30–38:24
8
What is the importance of prioritizing your partner in a marriage?
38:24–1:05:38