The Saint: The Horrible Hamburger (EP5031)

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The Great Detectives of Old Time Radio| Daily Mystery Dramas 37 min 6 speakers 5 chapters transcribed 1 month ago
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What is the main topic discussed in this episode?

Shannon Maldonado 0:00
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THE END
Adam Graham 1:13
Welcome to the Great Detectives of Old Time Radio. From Boise, Idaho, this is your host, Adam Graham. In a moment, we're going to bring you this week's episode of The Saint, but first, if you're enjoying the podcast, please follow us using your favorite podcast software. As this is the first episode of August, I want to go ahead and thank our new Platinum Patreon supporters who have been supporting the show for 10 years this month. And I want to thank Ian supporting the podcast at the Detective Sergeant level of $7.14 or more per month. And I also want to thank Michael, Gary, and Robert, each supporting the podcast at the Shamus level of $4 or more per month. Again, thank you so much for your support.
Adam Graham 2:08
Appreciate you supporting the show for the past decade. But now, from September 10th, 1950, here is The Horrible Hamburger.
Don Stanley 2:41
The Adventures of the Saint, starring Vincent Price.
Don Stanley 2:54
The Saint, based on characters created by Leslie Chalmers and known to millions from books, magazines, and motion pictures. The Robin Hood of modern crime now comes transcribed to radio, starring Hollywood's brilliant and talented actor Vincent Price as... The Saint.
Larry Dobkin 3:12
Taxi! Taxi! Among men who know locomotion best, it's Louie, three to one. Hello, Louie. Hi, Mr. Templer. Climb in. Thank you. And whither can I waft you this beautiful evening? Whither can you waft me? Louie, what's wrong? Something has to be wrong before I use a poetical type speech. No, but I... There's a law which says cab drivers can't use good English. Well, no, but I... So whither can I waft you?
Vincent Price 3:39
Waft me to Spring Lake Road, if you please.
Larry Dobkin 3:42
Spring Lake Road? I never heard of it. You got nothing better to do than go around making up new streets?
Vincent Price 3:47
Louie, Spring Lake Road is in Westchester. Good, let it stay there. Louie, I want to go there. Why? I've been invited to dinner by some friends. The food tastes better in Westchester? No, but my friends live there. Okay. Oh, please don't sulk, Louie. Lots of people live in Westchester. Lots of people are crazy. Westchester happens to be a very lovely place. Full of trees, ain't it? The trees are attractive. To who? Apes? Hmm. I'd better tell you how to go. You don't have to tell me. I'll find it. I know, but... Listen, Mr. Templer, I'm a cab driver.
Larry Dobkin 4:22
Cab drivers never get lost.
The End
Vincent Price 4:36
Louie. Don't say it. We've just passed that oak tree on the left for the third time. So it's an active tree. I thought cab drivers never got lost. Somebody swiped all the street signs. From the trees?

What is the premise of 'The Horrible Hamburger' and who stars in it?

Larry Dobkin 4:50
So I got lost. So I'll turn my badge in. So my wife will despise me. So my children will go through life ashamed of their old man.
Vincent Price 4:57
Louie, Louie, it's 10 o'clock. My dinner invitation was for 8.30. You'll never make it. I don't doubt that, but I'm hungry. Next time you get to an eating place... Don't say any more. Right up the road. Oh, yeah, the happy hamburger. Ben Lawton proprietor. It doesn't look very happy. What has it got to look happy about? I meant the place itself.
Larry Dobkin 5:19
So maybe it looks a little like if the wolf came around and huffed and puffed. You wouldn't have to strain a lung before it fell down.
Vincent Price 5:24
But food is food. Except when it's a happy hamburger, perhaps.
Larry Dobkin 5:31
Hey, it must be the wolf huffing or maybe puffing.
Vincent Price 5:34
Here he is. Yeah, savage-looking animal. Some wolf. The poor dog looks as if he hadn't eaten for a week.
Larry Dobkin 5:44
Let's get into the joint before he mistakes me for a T-bone steak.
Vincent Price 5:48
Oh, I must have ate his feelings. Happy Hamburger's not having a busy night. What can I do for you? We'd like some dinner. Well, we're kind of closing.

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