The Hoely Hour
Episodes
E165 Booch For The Cooch
05 Jan 2024
Contributed by Lukas
It's Season 2 and Liz and Amelia are back from a long winter's nap! Liz won't shut up about a Harry Potter fanfic (derogatory) and Amelia comes in hot...
E164 Matt stRife
01 Dec 2023
Contributed by Lukas
It’s our last episode of the year, angels!!! Liz ranks porn titles, Amelia gushes about Sabrina Carpenter, and we talk about everyone’s (least) fa...
E163 Scott Pilgrim VS A Litmus Test
24 Nov 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Amelia is on her last brain cell because moving is a universally soul-sucking experience. To no one's surprise, married men make way more money than a...
E162 The Year of the Girl (Led by Britney Jean Spears)
17 Nov 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Alternate title: Justice for Wendy Williams. We deep dive into the Britney Jean Spears autobiography and gush a bit about the guy on the Chiefs coming...
E161 Old Man Porn
10 Nov 2023
Contributed by Lukas
EVERYONE SHUT UP. Amelia has a big announcement. A listener writes in about their struggles in the bedroom with their boyfriend, and how porn could be...
E160 Threesome Thots Encore
04 Nov 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Liz is having a mental breakdown because moving is actually Dante's 7th circle of Hell and Amelia is jetsetting (and also having her own MentyB), so w...
E159 The Switzerland of Sex
27 Oct 2023
Contributed by Lukas
We’re back at it again with a new game that Amelia dreamt up, the financial benefit of having a supportive partner, and sex moves that porn lied to ...
E158 VonBitch with Sam_D0ll
20 Oct 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Our special guest this week is the iconic TikTok pop culture commentator, Sam_D0ll. If you don't know her, yes you do. Liz, Amelia, and Sam talk about...
E157 Stupid Italian Slut With a Big Jewish Ass
13 Oct 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Liz has a big life announcement, and we play a game of Top or Bottom, where Amelia reads off random nouns and the all-powerful Liz Ball sorts them int...
E156 Mr. Taylor Swift
06 Oct 2023
Contributed by Lukas
We’re doing it old school (quarantine) style and recording from a distance. Amelia is in Florida with her dog, but we couldn’t wait another moment...
E155 Boyhood Stories with Mr. Liz
29 Sep 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Rookie podcaster Mr. Liz fills in for Amelia this week and shares stories about boyhood, like lighting things on fire and being hazed in the woods at ...
E154 None Of Our Business
22 Sep 2023
Contributed by Lukas
There are a lot of things in life that are none of our business, including "what's at the bottom of the ocean?" Who needs to know that? Liz and Amelia...
E153 I Don't Want My Forehead To Move
15 Sep 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Well, this was supposed to be a mailbag episode until Amelia brought up the fact that Reddit has been having a field day with an innocuous video she m...
E152 Toot It Up, Cutie!
08 Sep 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Liz and Amelia share listeners' boy math tips, and how every man is confident he can land a plane. Have you ever worn your underwear inside out becaus...
E151 PAP Twiddle
01 Sep 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Tighten your seatbelts because this one’s a rollercoaster. Liz and Amelia discuss girl math, the amorphous concept of boy math and men placing impor...
E150 The Death of Tweenhood
25 Aug 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Liz and Amelia discuss the facts that tweenhood no longer exists, some things that men do are just so cute, and how the only thing bigger than some me...
E149 Snow White and the 7 Cucks
18 Aug 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Is your celebrity crush a red flag, a green flag, a gay flag, or an obvious flag? True love's kiss solves everything, obviously. And Liz addresses a q...
E148 Fart Positivity With Mr. Liz
11 Aug 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Mr. Liz co-hosts while Amelia (and Frank) are Out Of Office. He answers your questions, like how to tell your adult boyfriend to clean up after himsel...
E147 This Barbie Sees Through Your Performative Feminism
04 Aug 2023
Contributed by Lukas
We're back and discussing dismantling performative feminism. Do you support women as a way to get your weenie wet? THIS JUST IN: you're doing it for o...
E146 Oddly Satisfying Vocal Fry
28 Jul 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Amelia and Liz play another game of Porn Title Rankings, including Bi-Curious George and Grinding Nemo(?). What's your girl dinner, and just as import...
E145 A Sexy Alien
21 Jul 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Shock of the century: we’re all over the place this week. We discuss the ethics of deep fake porn, the Colleen Ballinger saga, milk ducts, the conce...
E144 Everyone At Trader Joe's Is F*cking
14 Jul 2023
Contributed by Lukas
The sexual tension in Trader Joe's is palpable, and it's because they're all boning. Let's talk about Jonah Hill's texts, and how being "the cool girl...
E143 The Hoely Half Hour with Frank
07 Jul 2023
Contributed by Lukas
With Liz on vacation, Amelia has roped her boyfriend Frank into co-hosting a minisode! We take some ~juicy~ questions from the audience and discuss an...
E142 Everyone Had A Bush
30 Jun 2023
Contributed by Lukas
What's a beepus? A better question is, what ISN'T a beepus. Amelia does a "what's in my bag" for an audio medium, reads porn comments, and shares sex ...
E141 Onomatopoeia of Queefs
23 Jun 2023
Contributed by Lukas
*Stefon voice* This episode has everything: Andrew Tate in a Romanian Prison, men tracking women down from Bumble, euphemisms for masturbating, Charli...
E140 Harder Than A Charleston Chew
16 Jun 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Does every dad just love Rolos? Liz and Amelia read and answer emails from listeners asking about kinks, sexuality, and possibly traumatizing childhoo...
E139 Bridezilla or Bridechilla with Ceara O'Sullivan
09 Jun 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Comedian and SNL writer Ceara O'Sullivan helps us decide what's bridezilla and what's bridechilla! Liz and Amelia are starting a movement to unionize ...
E138 A Big W For Vaginas
02 Jun 2023
Contributed by Lukas
There's a new thing you need to try while... *ahem* self-pleasure. Can you guess what it is? Let's talk about the polarity in relationships, and some ...
E137 Caring is Cool (with Frank)
26 May 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Hell must have frozen over, because someone wrangled in our girl. We're excited to talk to this week's guest, "Frank" (Amelia's BOYFRIEND) about his r...
E136 Queefs & Varts
19 May 2023
Contributed by Lukas
You guessed it: we're talking about queefs. Martha Stewart continues to reign supreme on the cover of Sports Illustrated! What's the science behind re...
E135 Lunch Ladies Gone Wild
12 May 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Welcome back! Have you ever been attacked by an automatic toilet? It's like an involuntary bidet. Amelia gives a news update on an increase in throat ...
E134 Blame The Puritans
28 Apr 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Have you ever groped for trout in a peculiar river? (You probably have.) Amelia shares euphemisms for sex and their origins followed by a story about ...
E133 Sex Drawers
21 Apr 2023
Contributed by Lukas
You're telling me... Frank made this Ocean? Amelia recaps her weekend at Coachella. What's in your sex drawer? Because we have some recommendations......
E132 Gonzo D*ck
14 Apr 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Every kiss begins with timeless pussy. Amelia names the top 10 best adult film titles, and Liz advertises being a poster child for therapy. What have ...
E131 I Am The Captain Now
07 Apr 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Jim and Pam? Definitely cheating. Hairy men are the best kissers; we don't make the science. Amelia ends her dry spell, Liz pays homage to Nikki Minaj...
E130 Wet Your Whistle
31 Mar 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Women's intuition: it's a super power, kind of like That's So Raven. Liz and Amelia play a game of Guess That Quote between Andrew Tate and Dwight Sch...
E129 Disney Princess of Crows
24 Mar 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Would you wear a ring to let people know you're open to dating? Because that's the new alternative to online dating apparently. How often do "healthy ...
E128 Blow Your Beans
17 Mar 2023
Contributed by Lukas
What happens if you practice "semen retention"? And what are the benefits of masturbating? Amelia asks the hard questions on this week's Breaking Boob...
E127 A Man Called T-bone
10 Mar 2023
Contributed by Lukas
This woman kicked a guest out of their party for only referring to her boyfriend by his interesting nickname. A listener asks for fellatial advice, an...
E126 Jiant Jugs
03 Mar 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Welcome to this week's breaking boobs, where Liz and Amelia discuss relevant news like Selena Gomez and Hailey Bieber and scientific OF studies. Which...
E125 Honey, I Shrunk My Testicles
24 Feb 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Amelia and Liz read the weirdest email they've ever gotten, discover new strange kinks (and create a few new ones), and learn which of your favorite T...
E124 Where My Sigmas At?
17 Feb 2023
Contributed by Lukas
MGK cheated on Megan Fox, love is dead. Alphas are the girlboss of men, and the the Man dollar is week as the currency of male validation rapidly lose...
E123 MILF Island
10 Feb 2023
Contributed by Lukas
You can be anything! (But you HAVE to be a mom.) Speaking of moms, 30 Rock's fictional reality show MILF Island is now very real but it's called "MILF...
E122 Motel Pool Sex
03 Feb 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Amelia ended (started?) her year with her very first UTI! Amelia unlocks Liz's buried embarrassing memories and they both read listener emails with so...
E121 Where Is The Love?
27 Jan 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Studies show only hot people listen to The Hoely Hour. Amelia quizzes Liz on her knowledge of "phelias," possibly including the erotic interest of Sim...
E120 Have You Ever Met A Kieth?
20 Jan 2023
Contributed by Lukas
We have to talk about the Tennessee police department harem. Speaking of harems, one tech fraud thinks polyamory should operate like a Chinese Imperia...
E119 Ronald McDonald Is A Switch
13 Jan 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Liz and Amelia are finally reunited! Play our new favorite game: Top or Bottom? Amelia discloses some important sexual firsts, including foot stuff. D...
E118 Grifters' University
06 Jan 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Welcome to Liz's segment called, "Dudes We Hate Taking L's." The men assigned Chad at birth started our off 2023 RIGHT by doing things like getting ar...
E117 The B Spot
31 Dec 2022
Contributed by Lukas
You've heard of the G spot, but did you know it's named after a man? (Typical man, naming part of the vagina after himself.) Also some man on reddit h...
E116 MiniMeliSode
23 Dec 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Well, it's me again. Amelia "Directionless" Samson, venturing out without my trusty companion. Liz and I are both going to be recording little mini ep...
E115 The Phil of YOUR Future
17 Dec 2022
Contributed by Lukas
What do you think the confetti of orgasms are? Because we have some ideas. Amelia shares the details of her DM history with THE Phil of the Future, a ...
E114 #SaveLinda
09 Dec 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Check in on your Lindas, save them from Former Pretty Girl Syndrome. Liz and Amelia share what one reviewer called "liberal propaganda," and discuss B...
E113 Big Scrotum Energy with Jesse Lyon
02 Dec 2022
Contributed by Lukas
We're talking about dreams! (No, not the Fleetwood Mac song.) Dream Scientist and Hypnotherapist Jesse Lyon joins us to explain why our exes haunt us ...
E112 The Pete Davidson Effect
25 Nov 2022
Contributed by Lukas
The Male Gaze VS The Female Gaze. Liz shares her dissertation on what makes Pete Davidson hot by explaining the difference between The Male Gaze and T...
E111 A Swift 'Sode
18 Nov 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Amelia is hosting alone this week and you know what that means: complaining about technology she never has to worry about when Liz is in town! On this...
E110 Ryan Lochte Sperm
11 Nov 2022
Contributed by Lukas
First date coffee dates: the bar is on the floor, I fear. Liz and Amelia discuss a Findom/Paypig video making the internet cringe, talk antidepressant...
E109 Life Is Like A Tesla
04 Nov 2022
Contributed by Lukas
... It's all on fire while we're locked inside! Despite imminent death at the hands of billionaires, Liz and Amelia discuss their thoughts about body ...
E108 Sexy Minion (Derogatory)
28 Oct 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Amelia and Liz rank the 5 of the worst costumes you can think of while praying for the children participating in The Devil's Favorite Holiday! (Lord k...
E107 Women In STEM!
21 Oct 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
E106 Greyhound Bus Behavior
14 Oct 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Have you ever jerked off on a Greyhound bus? (Please say no.) Amelia shares some of the wildest places people confessed to masturbating in! Liz and Am...
E105 Crying After Sex
07 Oct 2022
Contributed by Lukas
For once the episode title is exactly what the episode is about! TWO different listeners wrote in to share their experiences crying after sex. Did you...
E104 The Try Guys Try Goats
30 Sep 2022
Contributed by Lukas
We bet you have never been asked this question about a goat. And let's address the Wife Guy in the room. Public figures simply CANNOT stop getting cau...
E103 Creepy Uncles and Insecurities
23 Sep 2022
Contributed by Lukas
According to Game of Thrones, incest is best! Holy f*ck is this wrong! But holy hell is it erotic! Would you ever tell your partner they're not allowe...
E102 Daddy Science
16 Sep 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Why do men get to eat out but we have to do a JOB? Amelia and Liz channel their inner women in STEM and sell their bodies and what's left of their gir...
E101 Butt Weasel Renaissance
09 Sep 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Have you ever been called a shish-kabob (derogatory)? Amelia and Liz talk about their experiences with friendship breakups at every age and give advic...
E100 Pillow Talk ft. Mr. Liz (and King Butt)
19 Aug 2022
Contributed by Lukas
IT'S OUR 100TH EPISODE! Liz and Amelia talk about what they've learned, what has changed, and ask Mr. Liz questions submitted by listeners. Learn more...
E99 OnlyFans with OnlyAmelia
12 Aug 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Amelia hosts alone this week while Liz is taking some much needed R&R. I had the honor of interviewing content creator slash internet boyfriend slash ...
E98 NIPPLESODE!
05 Aug 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Kinky binkies, cherry mountains, nerts... It's the episode all about nipples! Liz and Amelia share interesting facts and even a few nipple stories of ...
E97 Jesus Had A Mullet
29 Jul 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Amelia gets confrontational with creeps and Liz shares how a tiny dishwasher cured her depression. A bridezilla doesn't know what time brunch should b...
E96 The BoneUS Room
22 Jul 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Babe, wake up, a new mental illness just dropped! Liz and Amelia discuss "retroactive jealousy disorder." Amelia brings a surprise show and tell from ...
E95 Confident Fraud, Ready to F*ck
15 Jul 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Netflix finally invents sex! What tattoos do you think are red flags? Hint: It's definitely realistic lions. Amelia learns what a "snow job" is, and a...
E94 Whose Incel Is It Anyway?
08 Jul 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Welcome to Amelia's poetry slam! The ladies talk about kindness after breakups when it no longer matters, followed by Incel Pickup Line reenactments! ...
E93 Hoe Union
01 Jul 2022
Contributed by Lukas
The first half of this episode is dedicated to sharing information about abortion resources. And! An iconic AITA post explains how a college girlie ac...
E92 T*tty With French Fries
25 Jun 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Welcome to Hot Trash Summer! Liz and Amelia discuss the questionable concept of "vabbing" and how to accurately conduct a scientific study. Let's talk...
E91 The Real Workwives
17 Jun 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Is he cheating, or is she just a normal person that needs a ride home from work? Liz and Amelia get deep about if forgiveness after cheating is truly ...
E90 2 Hoely 2 Furious
11 Jun 2022
Contributed by Lukas
It's our 2nd birthday! We're in our terrible two's now! This special episode, Liz and Amelia play a game of Truth or Drink... Learn more about your ad...
E89 Build-A-Brad
03 Jun 2022
Contributed by Lukas
You've heard of Build-A-Bear but now you can build your man! The girls talk about swallowing like a Catholic (on Christmas and Easter), sex magick for...
E88 Say Psych Right Now
27 May 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Some (weird) moms get jealous of their son's partner because she sees her as "the other woman." Have these moms considered being normal? Let's find ou...
E87 Conscious Partnerships with Ariel June
20 May 2022
Contributed by Lukas
While Amelia is power-suiting it up at a wedding this week, Liz invites meditation teacher and inner work guide, Ariel June to share how to navigate a...
E86 Assigned Chad At Birth
13 May 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Is it important to impress the parents? Research says yes, but Liz's exes say no. Sit back, get your favorite phalic-shaped snack, and learn all about...
E85 Who Let The Dogs Out?
06 May 2022
Contributed by Lukas
LIVE from the Handmaid's Tale, IT'S CONSTITUTIONAL RIGHTS! First of all, we'd like to publicly apologize to The Baja Men. In another dimension, Amelia...
E84 A Bee-Powered Vibrator
29 Apr 2022
Contributed by Lukas
All aboard the hot mess express! This week's episode was recorded remotely since Liz got a visit from Miss Rona herself. Men will literally break thei...
E83 Lung-popping Masturbation
22 Apr 2022
Contributed by Lukas
What would you do for free rent? Because we have an offer for you, but it involves the worst roommate ever. Let's discuss the sex doll mommy/man child...
E82 Getting Your Wiggles Out
15 Apr 2022
Contributed by Lukas
When you want something between celibacy and a hoe phase, it's called "getting your wiggles out." Amelia shares some dating life updates, and a listen...
E81 Consent Is My Kink Pt. 3
08 Apr 2022
Contributed by Lukas
The month of April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month. This week’s episode may be triggering for some listeners. We talk about statistics around sexu...
E80 Chad Thunderc*ck
01 Apr 2022
Contributed by Lukas
We invented a new game: Hot or Ick? The game where you debate if something is attractive or cringe! Have you heard of semen retention? According to Ch...
E79 The More You Hoe!
25 Mar 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Is Usher good at sex? Amelia has the answer! Liz and Amelia share a very special voicemail from a self-proclaimed "total catch" (who is apparently in ...
E78 Gout Dads!
18 Mar 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Was Kim Kardashian coming out as a fascist on your 2022 bingo card? The girls let Kim know how much a stay-at-home parent is worth. Have you heard the...
E77 Threesome Thots
11 Mar 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Thots are like regular thoughts, only slutty. What's the most you've ever done for someone you weren't officially dating? We've talked about threesome...
E76 Fighting With My Appendage
04 Mar 2022
Contributed by Lukas
We've talked about d*ck flexing before but Liz wants you to know she will attack you like a rabid cat. This week we feature three different listener e...
E75 Itty Bitty Tittysode
25 Feb 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Boobs. Boobies. Melons. ChiChis. Juggernauts. Mama Milkies. It's the boob episode! Liz and Amelia talk about their relationship with their boobs over ...
E74 Attack of the Femcels!
18 Feb 2022
Contributed by Lukas
What would you do if you unbuttoned an adult partner's pants and were greeted by a diaper with no warning? You've heard of incels, you know them, you ...
E73 Susisode
12 Feb 2022
Contributed by Lukas
We're telling a few sus stories today... Liz wants to know why an ex boo-thang is liking all her old photos, Amelia wants to know why dudes with alleg...
E72 A D*ck Swingin' Song
04 Feb 2022
Contributed by Lukas
First of all, we have a BIG announcement! Also, Liz and Amelia talk about the alarming rhetoric around single moms. What song would you want to get d*...
E71 Tunnel Sisters
28 Jan 2022
Contributed by Lukas
The energy is chaotic today, but we're here for it! Liz and Amelia explain who West Elm Caleb is, because it turns out a Man of the Pod and one of Ame...
E70 Bertie Bott's of Arousal
21 Jan 2022
Contributed by Lukas
The girls start off with a hot story - literally. Apparently Drake put hot sauce in his used condom? And apparently this is like... a thing? Also weed...
E69 Dirty Little Pig Boy
14 Jan 2022
Contributed by Lukas
It's episode 69! NICE. Liz admits to making Sims porn over the break and using it like a sports play-by-play. Amelia shares a DOOZY of a cheating stor...
E68 You Are The Main Character
31 Dec 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Happy New Year, Angels! 2022 is bringing you that main character energy, and we're starting it off by talking about how you can catch your haters secr...
Happy Hoelidays!
24 Dec 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Amelia and Liz slow down this week to acknowledge what a tough couple of years it's been and read a touching email from a listener. They reflect on so...
E67 The Legend Of Chowder
17 Dec 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Bare minimum who? Liz and Amelia have an in-depth conversation about what things men have done in their relationships that raised the bar and blown th...