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The Luke and Pete Show

Society & Culture Comedy

Episodes

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Episode 199.64: Man with ferret

24 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Here are the notes that Luke took from this episode with the apparent hope of writing a synopsis about it:'Eyebrows', 'tabloid newspapers', 'ferret', ...

Episode 199.63: Postman Pat redux

21 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

We're back, back from outer space, we just walked in and saw you sat there with that look upon your face. This time around we take the time to critiqu...

Episode 199.62: Cast iron conversation

17 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Happy Thursday, guys! Great to see you all back here for another dose of your bi-weekly Luke and Pete Show. We're almost at the weekend, so what bette...

Episode 199.61: Don't be a tit

14 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Welcome back to The Luke and Pete Show universe, an environment in which opinions can be expressed freely, secrets can be kept, and Pete Donaldson's l...

Episode 199.60: Spooky Siri

10 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Welcome back to The Luke and Pete Show! Happy Thursday! Before we head off on the latest leg of our theatre tour with Football Ramble Live (tickets at...

Episode 199.59: Serotonin poppadom

07 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

This episode of The Luke and Pete Show begins with chat about a recent visit to Northampton to experience their intriguing town centre (Cash Converter...

Episode 199.58: A cannibal that doesn't exist

03 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

It's been a while but on today's show we delve back into the conspiracy theory/apocryphal tale arena, thanks to an over-exuberant listener who may or ...

Episode 199.57: A little bit of the bubbly!

30 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

How do you sleep? Pete wishes he could just take his arms off. It would make the whole ordeal easier. One thing that would definitely make life more e...

Episode 199.56: Dog professor

26 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Luke's been to Churchill War Rooms and Pete's been to McDonald's. Both places include technology of interest, one related to the safety and survival o...

Episode 199.55: Black pudding volcano

23 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

In seismic news, not just for the LAPS community but the UK cultural scene at large, the members of seminal pop-punk band One Eyed Willy reformed for ...

Episode 199.54: Scallops at a minimum

19 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

A bit of a meme special this one as we contemplate what Pete would do to maximise his revenue should he become a meme. There's talk of a meme refuge, ...

Episode 199.53: Luke and Pete Con

16 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Hello and welcome to today's episode of The Luke and Pete Show, with your hosts Pete Donaldson and Luke Moore. On this edition of the show literally n...

Episode 199.52: Having a tab on the toilet

12 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

We can't believe it's taken this amount of episodes but finally we get around to the conversations we had about sex education when we were kids, and a...

Episode 199.51: A pipe of Pringles

09 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Welcome back to an all-new episode of The Luke and Pete Show, it's lovely to have you with us. This time around, we talk a lot about the hierarchy of ...

Episode 199.5: I'm a little teapot

05 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

That's right, episode 199.5, not 200. 200 is on its way at some point but Pete won't let it pass without a fanfare and so we've recorded episode 199.5...

Episode 199: Trapped on an island

02 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Luke's spent the weekend in a field with some pals, drinking cider. It's like being 15 all over again. Meanwhile Pete has got a huge issue with educat...

Episode 198: Off with their heads

29 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Everyone's stealing this week. Whether it's sand, heads from a tourist attraction or something else, it feels like everyone is at it. Hell in a handca...

Episode 197: 10,000 hours of solitude

26 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

How did it take us until episode 197 to mention that cornflakes were invented by a man on a mission to stop masturbation? Pete claims to have known ab...

Episode 196: Burying elephants

22 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

What do they do with zoo elephants after they've died? Pete thinks he has the answer, but Luke isn't convinced. What Luke is convinced about though is...

Episode 195: Vinegar strokes

19 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

It's Luke and Pete Show time here at Stakhanov, and on this damp and dreary Monday we try and brighten things up with a good old fashioned, healthy lo...

Episode 194: Is that a real man?

15 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

If you're have a tough old week at work, don't worry, you're nearly there now. It's Thursday, and Luke and Pete have got your back for another half an...

Episode 193: This could be anywhere

12 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Happy Monday and a warm welcome to The Luke and Pete Show, it's very nice to see you! Pete's been to Rotterdam for the weekend and has been very impre...

Episode 192: Return of the mercury maze

08 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Welcome to your all-new episode of The Luke and Pete Show, in which we talk about possibly the most diverse range of subjects ever. From fridge dumpin...

Episode 191: A bin bag of bees

05 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

If you had the chance to incorporate a long egg into a recipe why wouldn't you? Luke and Pete find themselves incredulously discussing why a celebrity...

Episode 190: Technically speaking

01 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

A very good evening from Luke and Pete towers. Apologies for lateness with this one, Luke uttered the word ‘technically’ and everything went ever-...

Episode 189: Fighting on cruise ships

29 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Happy Monday! This time on your all-new episode of The Luke and Pete Show, Luke's been to the Lake District, and Pete has been out for a drink with hi...

Episode 188: Taco Bell with your mam

25 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

FIRE IN THE BOOTH! It's the hottest day of the year, but just when you thought it couldn't get any hotter, here come Luke and Pete with some fresh #re...

Episode 187: On the dhole

22 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

50 years ago last weekend, Apollo 11 touched down on the lunar surface and the men within it made history. Luke and Pete take some time to celebrate t...

Episode 186: Spicy Richard

18 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Pete's been hobnobbing with celebrities again, this time around it's The Smashing Pumpkins' Billy Corgan, Primal Scream's Bobby Gillespie, and Bagel M...

Episode 185: Feel the Bern

15 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

We would like to cordially and warmly invite you to the latest episode of The Luke and Pete Show, half an hour in which we discuss Serena Williams, Me...

Episode 184: Stories from an onsen

11 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

This episode of The Luke and Pete Show involves a story from Pete Donaldson which beggars belief, and it involves a child at an onsen. An onsen is a h...

Episode 183: Otterly ridiculous

08 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

In which we lament the passing of Eddie the Sea Otter, talk about the nature of time, wonder what's going on with the Stranger Things kids, and try to...

Episode 182: Back with a Boston Crab

04 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

After an extended break involving several 'best of' episodes, Pete and Luke are back in the studio and talking through all your old favourites, as wel...

Episode 181: Back in a bath of Bannatyne

01 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Pete and Luke return with their final summer best of. They'll be back this Thursday with more daft nonsense. In this special, Luke submerges himself i...

Episode 180: The molasses against the classes

27 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Pete and Luke are taking a break for one solitary week (and one normal-sized day) this summer, so Pete's got his razor blade out and sliced up a cheek...

Episode 179: Dear sons and daughters of hungry bum ghosts

24 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Pete and Luke are taking a break for one solitary week (and one normal-sized day) this summer, so the former has cobbled together a special look back ...

Episode 178: Do those sharks bite?

20 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Lock picking. Fuelling cyclists. Bone conductors. Just three things you better prepare yourself for when you hit play on today's episode of The Luke a...

Episode 177: A mate called Fraggle

17 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

This is an episode of firsts for Mr Pete Donaldson. Within it, we hear of the first time his Dad left him adult-less with only a friend called Fraggle...

Episode 176: A Tunnock's celebration

13 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Hello everyone! We're back, and celebrating Boyd Tunnock's knighthood. Richly deserved for a great man who's made a fantastic contribution to society ...

Episode 175: Wedding swelling

10 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Hello there, nice to see you. This time around on your hot-off-the-press Luke and Pete Show, Luke's been to the Deep South and has come back as brown ...

Episode 174: Vegan power

06 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Hear the one about the vegan man who turned meat-eater? It's not gone down terribly well, as you can probably imagine. We discuss that on today's epis...

Episode 173: Kebab shop etiquette

03 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

What's it like to live off-grid for nearly 80 years? And could Pete Donaldson do it? Just two of the things we're investigating on today's episode, al...

Episode 172: Soft water and quicksand

30 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Good morning and a very warm welcome to your latest instalment of The Luke and Pete Show. To take you through to the end of the working week, the two ...

Episode 171: Puffer fish drugs

27 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

How would you like to be disposed of when you're dead? That's the Alan Partridge-esque question the chaps attempt to answer on this, your all-new epis...

Episode 170: Endings

23 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

This time around on what the kids are affectionately called 'LAPS', we hear of a bunch of school kids that got to spend their time hanging out at a th...

Episode 169: A Townshend warning

20 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Is Pete Donaldson the Champagne Papi of podcasting? Answers on an email. And if not, what is he?This time around on The Luke and Pete Show, despite pr...

Episode 168: That pigeon will not hang

16 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Thursday's child doesn't have that far to go guys because it's almost the weekend. Allow Luke and Pete to guide you there with chat about reservoirs f...

Episode 167: Intercom games

13 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Luke and Pete muster back in the studio for another audio missive, delivered fresh to your ears like a new piercing from Claire's Accessories (are the...

Episode 166: Queen cubicle

09 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

We're back and ready to bother you within an inch of your lives with 30 more minutes of premier nonsense. This time around, we pass comment on the new...

Episode 165: What is your location?

06 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Hi all! It's a bank holiday but that doesn't mean the hustle stops for your two eponymous heroes. No sir. Luke and Pete are back in the studio and dis...

Episode 164: Irn Bru bars and bustrains

02 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Yes, that's right, BUSTRAINS. Listen in to find out more, but rest assured that it's not a typo. Also featured in this all-new episode, a beluga whale...

Episode 163: Paulo the Heartbreaker

29 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Luke and Pete are back from Lisbon, and quickly warm up into telling some tales of their experiences there. There's also chat about watching movies wh...

Episode 162: Sid the racist neighbour

25 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Want to know what you can expect on this, the latest episode of The Luke and The Peter Show? Well, I'll tell ya: Abbey Road, racist neighbours, baseba...

Episode 161: A walrus in free fall

22 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Hello all! We know you're probably not commuting today as it's Easter Monday but don't let that stop you listening to the latest instalment of this fi...

Episode 160: Hands off my Tabasco

18 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

What a lovely day it is outside (if you're living in the London area)! But don't let that stop you downloading and listening to this, the 160th editio...

Episode 159: Superglue your hands together

15 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Happy Monday y'all! The terrible two are back! On the agenda today: Stewie D's weekend in The Big Smoke and his unorthodox moisturising technique, a m...

Episode 158: Locked out by your Dad

11 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

They said it wasn't possible, but our 158th instalment of this vanity project has landed, and GOODNESS ME it's a doozy! There's bees in a woman's eye,...

Episode 157: A Morph-less London Marathon

08 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Greetings all, we're back on this drizzly Monday to offer you half an hour more content to help pass your commute/gym session/run/whatever it is you d...

Episode 156: Toenail removal

04 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Hello everyone and a very warm welcome to this, your latest episode of The Luke and Pete Show! You're very welcome! Come in and make yourself at home....

Episode 155: A dog in the playground

01 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Welcome back to your all-new shiny episode of The Luke and Pete Show. Spring has sprung, so what better way to get out there and enjoy the sunshine th...

Episode 154: Pete Donaldson lorry attack

28 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Episode 154: Pete Donaldson lorry attackWelcome one and all, we're back in the studio and this time around dishing out red-hot chat on a variety of wi...

Episode 153: Spring has sprung!

25 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Luke's parents' tortoise has proven beyond all reasonable doubt that spring is now well and truly in the air, and on that happy note we get into this ...

Episode 152: MOTs make me cry

21 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Howdy! On your brand new episode of The Luke and Pete Show, you can expect to hear tales of plastic wrap, stockpiling food for Brexit, Pete openly wee...

Episode 151: Bernie vs Bernie

18 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

A new pilot has entered the game! Pilot Dave brings The Luke and Pete Show squadron up to three pilots, and all we need now is a handful of planes and...

Episode 150: A little propeller

14 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Hello everyone, and welcome to the 150th instalment of this, The Luke and Pete Show (formerly known as Luke and Pete's Summer)! We're bloody grateful ...

Episode 149: Undercut Boulevard

11 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Howdy, it's Monday and we're back! It's time to talk about Crufts, as the world's premier dog show returned last weekend to much amusement and enterta...

Episode 148: Swinging the swing

07 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

It's World Book Day today! As a result, the boys spend some time talking about the books they are currently reading (well, Luke does. Pete can't remem...

Episode 147: Dangerous buildings in Taiwan

04 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Good afternoon and welcome to another episode of The Luke and Pete Show, and with Pete fresh off the plane from Taiwan, it's an absolute belter! We he...

Episode 146: Don't you ever do a crime

28 Feb 2019

Contributed by Lukas

We're back! And here's what to expect in this episode:- Walking sticks- Kid n Play- Pulling sickies- Hi-Vis jackets- Heroin- MannequinsAnd lots more. ...

Episode 145: Man dunks child

25 Feb 2019

Contributed by Lukas

What would happen if Pete and Luke grabbed an aircraft carrier from somewhere and piloted it to the South China Sea? Just one of the thought experimen...

Episode 144: Nostalgia podcasting

21 Feb 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Hi all, and a very happy Thursday to you! The Luke and The Pete are back and talking about the issues that matter to absolutely no-one. Hey, it keeps ...

Episode 143: A blistering tale

18 Feb 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Hello everyone, and a very happy Monday! Welcome to this edition of The Luke and Pete Show, which listeners of a nervous disposition should be very wa...

Episode 142: Brexit fondue

14 Feb 2019

Contributed by Lukas

It's Valentine's Day! So that means Luke and Pete are getting very romantic. Pete's even found a novel way of making hollandaise sauce, and he's even ...

Episode 141: Hot dogs in Central Park

11 Feb 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Welcome back to your fourteenth-favourite show about absolutely nothing at all, as it returns for another episode fresh from the weekend's excesses (w...

Episode 139: Into the Peteverse

04 Feb 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Good day to you, and welcome back to another instalment of the 182nd most popular comedy podcast in Qatar (yes, really)! It's officially National Sick...

Episode 138: Sticking your foot in it

31 Jan 2019

Contributed by Lukas

The weekend is rapidly approaching and what better way to get ready for it than to listen to today's Luke and Pete Show, which features plenty of chat...

Episode 137: Man dates cockroach

28 Jan 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Hello, good afternoon and welcome to another instalment of the soon-to-be-award-winning Luke and Pete Show! Those who are hoping we'd be well out from...

Episode 136: Digger Destruction

24 Jan 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Welcome back to The Luke and Pete Show, and after Monday's festival of news and action we get straight back into the weeds with yet more chat about Pr...

Episode 135: Chuckypigs, or chiggywigs?

21 Jan 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Welcome to your all new episode of The Luke and Pete Show, it's even more zeitgeisty than usual! That means we've got Prince Phillip doing his 'thing'...

Episode 134: Tattoos, death, and a Lukealike

17 Jan 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Hello everyone. Nice to see you. Thanks for popping back in. You've come to the right place for Pete's obsession with crap technology, information on ...

Episode 133: Foaming hell

14 Jan 2019

Contributed by Lukas

This time around on *your* Luke and Pete Show, Pete's been interviewing Steve Coogan about his new movie Stan and Ollie, and we quickly move things on...

Episode 132: Do it all on expenses

10 Jan 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Welcome back to The Luke and Pete Show! It's Thursday, and so it's very nearly the weekend. Allow us to help you get there with another half an hour o...

Episode 131: A broad parish

07 Jan 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Welcome to your all new episode of The Luke and Pete Show, indeed the second issue of 2019. We're celebrating the new year by discussing Limewire, Mor...

Episode 130: Donaldson Futurism

03 Jan 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Happy New Year everyone! We're now officially in the future, it's 2019. How exciting!On today's episode we discuss some of the predictions about what ...

Episode 129: Reflections on a year, sort of

31 Dec 2018

Contributed by Lukas

It's New Year's Eve! But that won't deter the chaps from discussing the big issues and getting reflective about the year that's just passed. We chat P...

Episode 128: Betwixtmas

27 Dec 2018

Contributed by Lukas

We're in that weird period of time between Christmas and New Year where no-one is really doing much of anything apart from you poor souls that have no...

Episode 127: A nut without the sack

24 Dec 2018

Contributed by Lukas

What better way to usher in Christmas than with plenty of chat about dead people that have dedicated their bodies to science? That's right, Pete has b...

Episode 126: Giving yourself a mountain to climb

20 Dec 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Hello to you all! You're very welcome in the Land of Luke and Pete. If you do visit us, expect to experience tales of a remarkable man climbing a huge...

Episode 125: Is that a man inside there?

17 Dec 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Greetings Luke and Peters! We're back, you literally can't get rid of us. This time around, among other things, we hear about a robot presented to a r...

Episode 124: Don't eat the yellow snow

13 Dec 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Pete has learnt that pollution is so bad in China that it's apparently turning the snow yellow. Meanwhile, Luke is lucky to be here after running a ro...

Episode 123: Errol Flynn's duck centipede

10 Dec 2018

Contributed by Lukas

It's Monday! But don't despair, because Luke and Pete have got your back. We'll stick with you your whole commute through (providing it's not longer t...

Episode 122: Baked bean pizzas and Irn Bru chew bars

06 Dec 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Hello everyone, and happy Thursday! The Luke and The Pete are back in the saddle and running the rule over yet more unplanned nonsense, including disc...

Episode 121: Finders Keepers

03 Dec 2018

Contributed by Lukas

How much money would you find on the street and keep? Pete found 50p once and it changed his life. For a bit. Listen in to hear more on that part...

Episode 120: Pete on a bus shelter

29 Nov 2018

Contributed by Lukas

It happened. Pete was once on the side of a bus shelter and it was on a bad hair day as well. Nightmare. In his line of work, presentation is everythi...

Episode 119: Do you want salt and vinegar?

26 Nov 2018

Contributed by Lukas

The terrible twosome are back in the habit, and this time around they're talking about U-Boats and their toilets (quite unreliable, apparently), as we...

Episode 118: Turtle Power

22 Nov 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Luke once made up an impromptu dance to Partners in Kryme's seminal 1990 classic Turtle Power at a school disco with his mate John. There was absolute...

Episode 117: Return of the eight year old millionaire

19 Nov 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Pete learns of Luke's exploits as a child involving trying to pull a fast one over the Tooth Fairy, and Pete reminds us all of his crush on Samantha F...

Episode 116: Pete Assange

15 Nov 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Pete has decided he'd quite like to visit the Japanese embassy, which is pretty handy as he's recently been cordially invited. Better pack the Ferrero...

Episode 115: Mushy pea sandwiches and Japanese KitKats

12 Nov 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Which of our two eponymous heroes has the most tragic life? Pete has a pretty good idea, but is he correct? Having said that, both Luke and Pete spend...

Episode 114: The Curse of the Colonel

08 Nov 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Why are baseball team curses so prevalent? Luke and Pete wonder that as they learn all about The Curse of the Colonel, a superstition that combines ba...

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