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The Morning Rumble

ON-AIR ๐ŸŸข - Rog Has Elton John Between His Legs

05 May 2026

Transcription

Chapter 1: What dramas are discussed about the downstairs department?

0.031 - 7.275 Unknown

This is a podcast from Rover. The Morning Rumble podcast. It'll even work in the evening.

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7.315 - 12.793 Bryce

Mal's in with another around the world, all these stories about the D, the downstairs department.

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20.213 - 23.78 Bryce

Head to the States this morning, Miles. Good morning. Morning, guys. Yes.

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Chapter 2: What is the story behind the 'Cool Story Bryce' segment?

23.961 - 24.341 Rog

Hello there.

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24.542 - 34.382 Bryce

It really is the home of plastic surgery, enhancement surgery, corrective surgery, whatever you want to call it. A lot more of it here these days, isn't it? You can really see it on Instagram.

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Chapter 3: What experiences are shared regarding double breaks?

34.402 - 38.63 Bryce

Yeah, sure can. People not really smiling. Yeah. Because they can't.

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39.171 - 40.294 Rog

Big lips as well.

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40.354 - 44.141 Bryce

Yeah. Well, today, Mel, we're talking about big Ds like Rodgers.

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44.702 - 45.664 Rog

Oh, yes, Rod.

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45.684 - 47.988 Bryce

Because his has shrunk, but he's going to get some of this.

48.149 - 48.389 Unknown

Okay.

48.409 - 55.603 Bryce

He was telling us it was an off-air chat. Yeah. But it's so relatable. An off-air chat which you brought up on.

Chapter 4: What shocking incidents involving electrocutions are mentioned?

55.583 - 67.499 Bryce

Because I worry about you, mate. And you were saying, you were telling us off here that ever since you've moved house with us last week. Yes, you're saying like a nut smaller. No, I think he used the word shriveled.

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67.699 - 71.524 Rog

And you bring your problems to work as well and we need to sort these out.

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71.744 - 87.023 Bryce

All we're trying to do is help. Oh, well, thanks. But, and miles might have the solution. I can't wait to hear it. Now, so what's happening with plastic surgery in the downstairs? Well, People like Roger turn into what is called penis filler. PF.

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87.684 - 88.585 Bryce

Yeah, the PF.

88.605 - 89.526 Rog

So puffing it up.

Chapter 5: What are the Reno rescues that are highlighted?

89.546 - 104.142 Bryce

So I know you're talking about your PBs, but it's your PF. Right, what do I do there, Miles? Well, you get a treatment, all right, and you're getting a jabbing needle to enhance the shape and girth of your tiny little piece there. Shape?

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104.723 - 110.571 Bryce

They shape you like that Ed Sheeran song. Yeah. Well, it could end up looking like Ed Sheeran if you don't look after it properly.

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110.591 - 111.593 Rog

Got to be careful, eh?

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Chapter 6: How does the Car vs Horse story unfold?

111.873 - 113.816 Rog

It's got a little ginger top to it. Hang on, hang on, hang on.

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113.856 - 143.337 Bryce

Slight detour. If yours was to look like a pop star, which pop star would you choose? Lil Nas X. That's great, honestly. He'll have a little cowboy hat. I reckon Roger's rolling in Elton John. This is why I need the filler mask. By the way, it doesn't. Mine looks like Post Malone. Yours all tatted up. Yeah, and it lost its weight.

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143.502 - 153.421 Bryce

Mine used to look like jelly roll, but I actually lost a bit of weight. You don't want anyone to call it jelly roll. No, you don't. Well, maybe you do.

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153.441 - 156.687 Rog

I think you do. I don't know. Okay, so anyway, back on track. Back on the filler.

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156.967 - 166.926 Bryce

Anyhoo, the treatment involves injecting hyaluronic acid, dermal filler. It's the same use for lips and cheeks. Sorry, Mel. Stop saying yes so quick.

166.946 - 167.928 Rog

Yeah. It's like, you know.

167.968 - 171.614 Bryce

Well, I think I've heard this story before as well.

172.015 - 173.818 Mel

You've heard it? Oh, come on now.

173.838 - 180.569 Bryce

The problem is, the problem is, Rog got the backstreet version, the terrible one. His nails, it looks like a picnic bar.

Chapter 7: What humorous anecdotes are shared about tasering?

189.537 - 203.193 Bryce

So, Melz, this is what they're getting done. And this is what... It's a thing, obviously. Oh, they. Sure, Rog. Yeah. Anyway, they last for about four months. Longer-lasting versions can remain effective for two to five years.

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203.233 - 203.714 Mel

Oh, wow.

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204.555 - 207.778 Bryce

It uses local anaesthetic, falls up to 40 injection points.

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209.16 - 216.27 Bryce

I don't know if I'd have 40 around mine. Mine would take about four to eight. You've got to have a post-op rap on it for three weeks.

218.052 - 219.795 Rog

That's a bit much, doesn't it?

219.935 - 224.402 Bryce

Like a fresh spring roll. You've got to have a decast.

224.422 - 230.051 Rog

No, mate, this sounds too much work. Just be happy with your little mushroom.

230.331 - 232.234 Bryce

Imagine your little pee-pee in a sling.

Chapter 8: What are the implications of the horse incident discussed at the end?

234.939 - 235.801 Bryce

Hey, no, thank you, Rog.

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235.821 - 236.802 Mel

Great story, great research. Thank you.

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236.822 - 260.862 Bryce

Because you come to the table with us and we really appreciate it. Oh, thanks, mate. And it's going to get worse next because Creatures in with a Creatures Corner. What do you reckon? Oh, yeah. Which pop star would Creatures look like? Oh, like a beautiful Sabrina Carpenter. With her long, luscious hair. A major concern. Creech, next. Yes, next.

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260.882 - 271.385 Bryce

We're going to talk about a biohazard baguette that was left on my driveway. Creech's Corner.

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271.405 - 271.485

Wow.

271.465 - 293.744 Bryce

Good morning. Good morning. Head into your sometimes disturbing and dark corner, Creech, this morning. Now, this is not usually stuff you've done, but this is something you discovered over the weekend. Yes, and it is still disturbing and dark, Rog. But on Sunday morning, one of my flatmates woke me up and said, Creech... Do we need a warning? Potentially.

294.145 - 294.385

Potentially.

294.365 - 319.495 Bryce

Potentially. We'll find out when we get there, I guess. The only reason I say is because I know what comes up in this story. Yeah, I mean, if you don't like gross stuff, then maybe this isn't for you. But at the same time, we all do it. So take that how you will. Anyway, take that however you like. So my flatmate, Dee Lee, he goes, Creed, you've got to come see this, mate.

319.897 - 341.517 Bryce

there's something on our driveway, something diabolical. What time is this? This was at like, I don't know, eight or nine in the morning, something like that. And on the Saturday night, all of the flatmates had done their own thing. So Harry in the back, he actually had a few people over for kick-ons. Myself and my lovely girlfriend Bella, we went to Mumford and Sons and had a magical evening.

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