Authentically Me with Ashley McMullen, MD
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Why did Dr. Ashley McMullen decide to let her hair go natural after a decade?
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Authenticity. It can be hard to tap into, especially in medicine when there's so many rigid ideas about how a doctor should look and act and talk. So how do we be doctors while also staying grounded in who we are? You're listening to the Nocturnists, stories from the world of medicine. I'm Emily Silverman. Today I speak with Dr. Ashley McMullen. Ashley is a Houston native who grew up nurtured by her mother, a pediatric nurse, and grandmother, an ordained minister. She attended UT Houston for Medical School, internal medicine residency at UCSF, and was ambulatory chief resident at San Francisco General Hospital. She currently practices primary care at the San Francisco VA and is the associate director for the UCSF Internal Medicine Residency Diversity Committee.
She served as the host and producer of the nocturneist Black Voices in Healthcare series and recently launched a new storytelling podcast with Dr. Kimberly Manning called The Human Doctor. But before we chat, here's Ashley's live performance from The Nocturnists in San Francisco in January 2020.
So it's spring of twenty eight. And I'm nearing the end of residency. And I find myself back in one of my favorite places in San Francisco. It's a place for me that is familiar and warm and safe. It's my hair salon. A small studio out in the South Mission, so it's just me and Stacy, my hairstylist. And I'm postcall, so been up all night, I'm delirious, and my hair's an entire mess, and I just cannot wait to sit in the chair and let Stacy work his magic as he's done month after month for the last couple years. And so I'm sitting there and Stacy applies this chemical relaxer to my roots and I feel that familiar tingling in my scalp that progresses into a sharp stabbing pain. Which lets us know that it's time to move to the sink.
And I feel That cold relief wash over me as he rinses out the relaxer and then massages my scalp with shampoo and conditioner. Afterwards we're back in the chair and I inhale that familiar scent of burning hair as he blow dries and flat irons and then empties half a can of hairspray and After this two hour process is done, I'm looking in the mirror and now my hair is fresh and clean, it's silky and very straight, just hanging right above my shoulders. I'm thinking to myself Why the hell am I still doing this?
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
Why did Dr. Ashley McMullen decide to let her hair go natural after a decade?
0:00–5:49
2
How did Ashley’s childhood experiences shape her relationship with her hair and identity?
5:49–11:24
3
What challenges did she face while using chemical relaxers throughout school and residency?
11:24–15:28
4
How did the hair‑relaxer metaphor influence her sense of self during medical training?
15:28–20:47
5
What pivotal moments led Ashley to stop chemically straightening her hair and embrace authenticity?
20:47–26:18
6
How does Ashley incorporate storytelling and narrative competence into patient care at the VA?
26:18–31:44
7
What insights does she share about using narrative teaching to foster empathy for marginalized patients?
31:44–36:47
8
What advice does Ashley give to clinicians seeking authenticity in a rigid medical culture?
36:47–41:26