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The Oprah Podcast

Daniel Pink

17 Dec 2024

Transcription

What is the power of regret?

784.367 - 806.962 Oprah Winfrey

Okay. Show up and go to the funeral. And that is how looking backward moves you forward because when you're able to take whatever it is that is the regret and turn it into something meaningful for you. Yeah. Well, we spoke to some people who are experiencing regret right now, and Tanya is one of them, and she joins us from the Bronx. Tanya, hi. Tell us what's going on.

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807.402 - 815.368 Caller 2

Hello. Hi there. Hello. How are you? Good to see you. Thank you so much, Ms. Winfrey, for having me, and Daniel, what a pleasure it is to meet you.

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815.388 - 816.228 Oprah Winfrey

Oh, fantastic.

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816.268 - 848.251 Caller 2

Virtually. You know, it's very interesting. When I think about the word regret, because I've done so much work on myself, I think I think about when I was young, when I was 16, between 16 and 21, I guess a nicer way to put it, I was boy curtsy. And I lost my virginity. in my opinion, well, I think probably across the board, too soon. I don't know what was happening with me, but it was complex.

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848.732 - 861.605 Caller 2

My dad was not at home. I'm not blaming that on that, but my life was definitely... just going through things that I couldn't explain. And I think that was an outlet for me.

863.246 - 890.393 Caller 2

In hindsight, as a 52-year-old woman now, when I look back, I definitely say to myself, gosh, I wish I would have just saved myself for someone who I loved, someone like my spouse that I'm with now, someone who I can talk to, someone that I know is hearing me, there for me, Just accepting me as I am, that would be my biggest regret.

890.613 - 912.826 Oprah Winfrey

I think this is so interesting, Tanya, because you have been with your spouse for how long now? I have been with my spouse this February, 18 years. 18 years. And is it something your spouse has brought up to you? Like, I wish you'd been a virgin when we married? No. Never. I thought it was interesting, too, and I'm sure, you know...

914.443 - 937.893 Oprah Winfrey

You grew up in, you know, I'm 20 years older than you, practically. But I also grew up in an era where if you liked boys, there was no discussion other than you can't date until a certain age. And if you showed any interest in boys whatsoever, you were considered boy crazy. And I noticed that you used that term to describe yourself. And I was thinking, that's not a term you came up with.

938.153 - 945.758 Oprah Winfrey

That's a label somebody gave to you. And... That's what you're carrying. That's part of what you're carrying. Daniel, what do you want to say to Tanya?

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