The Nightmare of a White Christmas
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What is the opening “black excellence” segment about?
Oh hi, welcome back you fucking slurs. I am Popeye the Sailor Man.
And I am Brandon Scott and this is the Reed. Thank you for joining us.
Damn right it is, and we are back once again for the usual black fuckery and shenanigans. But before we get to the fuckery and the shenanigans, we like to do something called black excellence where we talk about black people, black American people, African American people, African people, black German people, black Brits, black people from Atlantis. Hey Holly. All of Oh, that was Atlantica. Atlanta. Black excellent people. And this week we're gonna give it over to a baddie in tennis. You know, the US has been open. Well not literally, but you know.
You proud of that we're
No, I'm not. I'm just insane. So Taylor Townsend, 30 year olds, tennis, sham. Just uh scraped over a big old trophy for doubles. The U United States opened. Where she played with her partner Katarina Synakote Czech Republic.
Yep.
White lady from over there.
Mm-hmm.
And they defeated an all-American team consisted of uh Ashlyn Kruger and Robin Montgomery. So now uh Taylor Townsend is uh a big champ and this is her first time winning uh a doubles slam. Yeah. Double slam championship. Nice. First time in it. Partner, I think this is her second time. Um winning the doubles and uh this is particularly delightful because hey Taylor black beautiful skin and complexion not just because black but I mean look at her also gorgeous not just because black and beautiful complexion gorgeous talented And also, this is a great full circle story because she was not long ago. Um denied funding. by the United States Tennis Association because they said that she needed to improve her overall fitness.
This was um basically a dog whistle, quiet racist way of saying too thick, too curvy, too gorgeous. We don't see it because our our princess peaches and our daisies, how will they act you know that whole thing. Right. So um now they can all eat crow, dick, and I don't know, Cornish hen. Uh, because you know, she's batting what I really appreciated was this photo that I saw of her posing with the trophy in a gorgeous full grilling. Yeah. So what's gonna happen is you're just not gonna be able to take or you're gonna get up with the program because the girl is our black
bitch. Oh, and she did that. I'm so glad that she openly was like, Yeah, these hoes that was actually extremely fucked up what y'all did. Like I was the number one junior player in the world and y'all acted like I needed to do Anything differently before I was ready to go. You bitches are weird and mean and yeah. And
I haven't forgotten. And I won't
forget.
And me and my mama will never stop talking about it. Fuck y'all.
Oh, my mama said it's up for Patrick McEnroe for the rest of his days. Good good job, Taylor. I really sat there and watched uh so much tennis. I've I actually feel like I'm starting to get it now. And then people sent me this video of of what I basically said last week, which is that tennis is weird, the scoring is weird, the The whole fucking setup, the journey to actually win in a tennis game. I
can't believe a football fan is saying this. An American football fan.
American football is so straightforward.
Okay. All right. Okay. It's literally math. You have to have a graph and a scientific calculator to trust to follow the
legitimate. And you're telling
you okay, so you have to run a specific amount of yards, but in each that's a down. And there's but they you have so many of them. So then you have to count the so okay, so then keep track of it because this big ass field has how many notches?
How do the hosts discuss Taylor Townsend’s historic tennis win?
Oh, you weren't able to do it? Did you kick it into the W? Okay, well, no, you can't, and then that's the how many points, but this is how many points? Okay, well then the the the Y is a different amount. Yeah, that's exclusive, but you can't get a shit. Goodbye. Tennis is literally one person standing over here on two people, one or two people stand over here. You hit the ball X amount of times, you win.
No, I didn't say the game itself. I said the scoring and the the road to winning is what's unnecessarily complicated.
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What is the opening “black excellence” segment about?
0:24–5:02
2
How do the hosts discuss Taylor Townsend’s historic tennis win?
5:02–15:58
3
Why are the hosts confused about tennis scoring and match structure?
15:58–44:57
4
What is the new Beyoncé hair‑perfume product and why are they reviewing it?
44:57–1:03:25
5
What family dynamics are causing the Christmas dilemma?
1:03:25–1:06:01
6
How does the conversation shift to pop‑culture references like The Golden Girls?
1:06:01–1:11:29
7
Why do the hosts criticize the Chris Brown congressional‑record stunt?
1:11:29–1:17:56
8
What conclusions do the hosts draw about politics, activism, and wrapping up the episode?
1:17:56–2:16:32