How One Simple Word Is Destroying Your Company | Natalyn Lewis
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employers are afraid of their own employees. They're afraid of them walking in and saying, this is disrupting my mental health. And because I don't understand what mental health really is or how that might actually disrupt someone's mental health, I'm afraid that it might be. And it's like stepping on the cancer word. Like I have cancer, I have mental cancer. And I'm like, I don't know what that is. And I don't know how to fix it. And is this deadly? Is it problematic? Is it... And I work with employers every day who are literally afraid of their employees. They're afraid to stand and say, yes, it's hard to take no's on the phone and you're gonna be okay.
I'll give you a fun tool if you want to work with these guys. So if you solidify a strategy and the answer is yes, but, then what's happening is your guys will not stay consistent with their action plan.
Yes.
They're going to do something and then they're going to not do it at all. You're going to watch them not change behavior. If you come in and you can get them into a yes and category, they will start to change behavior. So when you come in and you say, okay, great, we're gonna go after this one product and they go, yeah, yeah, yeah, but, then say, okay, fantastic. With every but, I actually want you to define the concern. But what? Define the concern. What is your concern about going after this one product? Write them all down. What's the other guy? Oh, yeah, what's your concern about going after one product? Write them all down. And if you actually will put them in front of their face in writing, So that they can give voice to it and then see it on the board and then you acknowledge that in your move forward plan.
And they literally see that this action compensates for that concern. They'll move to a yes and and they'll start to form that behavior and they'll stick with it.
What a great exercise.
Yeah, there's a little piece of neural pathway and they're like where when we have as a human being, we have a picture. And this picture is a future. And that future has a lot of unknowns and a lot of uncertainties, right? And if I look into the future and all I see is unknown and uncertain, then I got to go grab onto everything in my past because the past is the only known and certain I've got. And what that creates is your butts. Oh, I know we're doing that, but. Well, I was looking forward, but. I'm trying to run in this direction, but. And when we will actually just capture the butts, capture all the concerns that are showing up. And then we actually show that the action plan moving forward addresses the concerns.
The mind stops barking at them. It can calm it right down and they can actually focus on an action oriented item that they have control over. And it starts to make them feel like they control the destination of their future. Absolutely love that.
So were you lying when you said in your LinkedIn post the other day, you're not a therapist, you're a coach? Because what you just gave me sounded more like therapy.
It's actually performance coaching, right? So if you think about it, I'm not going to go in and understand why each of these individual humans looks to the past. There is neuroscience that tells us this happens. A therapist in that same situation would say, What happened, Ryan, to you in your childhood that made it so that you really like to think about the past? What makes you scared of pursuing your dreams in the future? And I'm going to be like, oh, heck no. Here's what we know. We got neuroscience that tells us that innately as human beings, we need to feel safe. And do you know what safety looks like? It looks like the known. And do you know the only thing that's known in our life is the past? So why are people so blasted fixated at staring at their past?
Trying to recreate a success they previously had? Because it feels safe because it feels known. But the only thing that is as humans gets us exhilarated is gets us excited, gets us like pumped and live in life is actually progressing into the unknown future.
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