Look Who's Talking
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What is the Ryan Leak Podcast about?
What's going on, my friends? Welcome to the Ryan League Podcast, where we keep things short and sweet and always try and give you something practical to add value to your week. Over the past few months, been doing a book campaign and book marketing and podcasts and tons of speaking and it can be very life-giving and it can also be life-draining. And interestingly enough, I was having a rather deep conversation with my wife at the end of a very long day, about a month ago. And I just kind of got into a rant. Yeah, I was just going on and on about some of the draining, exhausting, frustrating, dare I say, complicated things that go along with a book campaign. And, you know, I just kind of got into this thing.
It's like, I don't know if I really want to do this anymore. And I just, I just kind of just got on this like passionate rant. And I'm talking, I'm ready to pivot careers. I'm ready to change my whole life. I'm ready to move to a cabin in Montana and start doing stuff outdoors. I don't even do stuff outdoors. So you know something was up.
How can tiredness affect decision-making?
And then in that moment, I paused and I said something that I think was interesting. I said, babe, you know what? Scratch all that. I think that's just my tired talking. And we both just laughed. She's like, yeah, I just think you're tired. I said, yeah, I think my tired is talking. And I just began to think, man, the worst time in the world to make any kind of major decision is when you're tired. Because when you're tired, Well, tired doesn't think clearly. Tired doesn't believe fully. Tired sees life through a foggy windshield. But it made me wonder, how often do I let something else do my talking? Think about it. Sometimes it's our insecurity doing the talking.
How does insecurity influence our conversations?
Have you ever looked at a conversation in the past and you just realized your insecurity says some things that you wish you could take back? You started comparing your motherhood to other moms on the internet. You started comparing your fatherhood to other dads at a sporting event. You walk into a room and you're like, do I belong here? Have you ever let your insecurity tell you that people don't value you even before they even meet you? You over-explain. You shrink. You second-guess. Why? Because it's your insecurity that's really loud. Your insecurity is doing the talking. Have you ever let your anxiety do some talking? Anxiety? Well, anxiety is loud. Oh, when it grabs the mic, it can make you take a downward spiral you did not mean to go down. Anxiety will have you rewriting your whole life based on one bad week. Oh, you'll start doom scrolling your whole future. You'll overanalyze text and tone and pauses. You'll plan a breakup for a problem that hasn't even happened yet. When anxiety does your talking, Peace is really hard to find.
What role does anxiety play in our thoughts?
Have you ever let your anger do your talking? Sometimes your mad takes the wheel. You yell at your kids over the dishes, but it's really about your boss. You snap at your spouse, but it's not even about them. It's just been simmering. When anger does your talking, people you love can feel like they're on strike too. When they didn't even know they were on strike once, When insecurity grabs the mic, you might downplay your own success. But when jealousy grabs the mic and starts doing your talking, you start looking for flaws in friends. She not even that great. He had help. They used a ghostwriter. Uh-huh. Yeah, the parents gave him a loan. Oh, they using ChatGPT. Bruh. Can I pull you to the side and just say, look who's talking. Look who's talking.
How can anger distort our communication?
Your jealousy has grabbed the mic. Do you know what it looks like when pride grabs the mic? Oh, you might even tell yourself, I'm just confident. They're the problem. But man, when pride starts doing your talking, it's really hard to admit when you're wrong. It's really hard to apologize. It's really hard to ask for help. Pride doesn't just talk. It talks over people. You want to know what's really hard when it takes over? Disappointment. Yeah, sometimes it doesn't even feel like a loud emotion. It's a quiet one. Disappointment. Whispers. You're sad, but sometimes it comes out as sarcasm. You're hurt, but it sounds like shade. You mask unmet expectations with fake indifference. You say things like, well, whatever, I don't even care. The problem is you do care.
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