The Selfish Woman

Stress Is Not The Problem...This Is: With Dr. Rachel Goldman

23 Mar 2026

Contributed by Lukas

We've all been there: a plan falls apart, a deadline shifts, or a minor inconvenience feels like the end of the world. Or, we spend way too much of ou...

The Wrong Life: Ep. 130

16 Mar 2026

Contributed by Lukas

I left Spain to figure out what was wrong with me.  I had the dream life. The cobblestone streets. The European light. The copper bathtub imported fr...

You Didn't End Up Here by Accident: Numerology, Patterns & Your Life Path with Ann Perry

02 Mar 2026

Contributed by Lukas

What if your life isn't random?  In this episode, I sit down with numerologist Ann Perry to break down what your numbers reveal about you, and how th...

Why You Keep Overthinking (And What You're Actually Avoiding)

23 Feb 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Why do you keep overthinking decisions when you already know what to do?  In this episode I break down why overthinking isn't a clarity problem, it's...

From Netflix's 'Sex, Love & goop' to Erotic Wholeness: Darshana Avila on Asking For What You Want

15 Feb 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Darshana Avila left her corporate career and her marriage, and stepped into a life of erotic wholeness.  Now she's a Certified Somatic Experiencing P...

From Selfish to Sovereign

09 Feb 2026

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode I reveal the next level of your journey - from midlife reinvention to full-blown feminine sovereignty. If you're a woman ready to rise...

The Cost of Quiet with Colette Jane Fehr

02 Feb 2026

Contributed by Lukas

You've been swallowing your truth, avoiding conflict, and hoping things will change if you're just patient enough.  But your silence isn't safety.......

Selfish is the Strategy: A New Era Begins

26 Jan 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Welcome to Season Five - and to 2026!  In this powerful kickoff episode, Valerie pulls back the curtain on what it really means to be selfish in a wo...

Why Your 'Word for the Year' Fails: And How to Choose One That Changes Everything

16 Dec 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Most people choose a word for the year based on what they want to achieve, acquire, or accomplish. But that's not how transformation works.  In this ...

The Year of the Snake: What You Need to Shed Before 2026

11 Dec 2025

Contributed by Lukas

2025 is the Year of the Snake. 2026? The Year of the Fire Horse.  If you're familiar about Chinese zodiac symbolism, you know what that means: the Sn...

The 'Holy Sh*t' Moment: When You Start Toppling Your Sacred Cows

10 Nov 2025

Contributed by Lukas

This is a personal episode for me, one that I feel led to share with you, because I know it's going to resonate.  There's a moment in every woman's l...

Hype Women! With Erin Gallagher

27 Oct 2025

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode I'm joined by Erin Gallagher, author of Hype Women: Breaking Free From Mean Girls, Patriarchy and Systems Silencing You.  Buckle up f...

The Mystic & the Machine: Merging AI with Inner Intelligence with Karen Romine

20 Oct 2025

Contributed by Lukas

What happens when strategic intelligence meets spiritual intuition?  In this electric conversation, I sit down with keynote speaker and author, Karen...

Selfish Out Loud: Are You Willing to Pay the Price for Your Power?

13 Oct 2025

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode, I'm pulling back the curtain on what it really costs to be selfish. Not cute-selfish. Not #selfcare selfish. I'm talking about the ki...

Rewrite the Mother Code with Dr. Gertrude Lyons

06 Oct 2025

Contributed by Lukas

What if the way you've been taught to mother - your children, your dreams, yourself - was never yours to begin with?  In this potent conversation, I ...

My Everest, Your Dream: What it Takes to Rise

29 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Every woman has her Everest - the dream that feels impossible until suddenly, it isn't.  I had my Everest moment and I'm sharing what it was, how I g...

Masks, Mothers, and the Myth of Being Nice with Lesa Koski

22 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

You weren't born nice. You were trained.  By mothers who were trained.  By systems that still benefit from your silence.  In this episode, you'll h...

10 Sneaky Ways the Good Girl is Still Running Your Life

15 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Think you've outgrown your good girl programming? Think again. These 10 subtle habits might be sabotaging your power - and keeping you small without e...

Why Taking the High Road Is Keeping You Stuck (and what to do instead)

08 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Too many women think that taking the high road makes them strong, wise, or 'the bigger person.' But what if that road is actually keeping you stuck in...

The Five Lessons That Saved Me When I Started Over

25 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

This is the one I've been waiting to record.  In this final episode before The Selfish Year enters the world, I'm sharing the five lessons that truly...

Ep. 113: No More Layers: Martine Cohen on Stripping Back to Your True Self

18 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

In this week's episode, I'm joined by Martine Cohen - author, speaker, and transformative coach - who brings a powerful blend of intellect and intuiti...

Ep. 112: The Sofa of Truth: When Staying Hurts More Than Leaving

11 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Sometimes, the truth doesn't arrive with fireworks. It shows up quietly...in the middle of the night...on your sofa.  In this episode, I read an exce...

Ep. 111: You Can't F**k It Up: A Conversation with Jennifer Pastiloff

29 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Let's be real: how many hours have you spent replaying that moment, that choice, that mistake, wondering if you'd just ruined everything? Cringing in ...

Ep. 110: Why Women Don't Ask (And What It's Costing Us)

21 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

We've been told our whole lives not to want too much, need too much, or ask for more.  So we don't. We shrink, we wait, and we hope someone notices a...

Are you a control freak? Here's the cost of holding it all together

14 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

If you call yourslef a 'control freak' like it's a badge of honour, this one's for you.  In this episode, I break down the truth about control: why i...

Ep. 108: Burnout isn't exhaustion, it's a wake up call: With Amy Green Smith

07 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Most women think burnout just means being tired. But what if it's acutally a signal - a brutal nudge - to stop abandoning yourself?  In this episode,...

Ep. 107: Selfish Summer Camp Starts Now: I'm Doing This My Way

30 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

This week, I had a moment. Okay.... a full-on meltdown. But underneath it, I realized something powerful: I've been trying to launch my book, The Self...

Ep. 106: Broke to Six Figures: How I did it Without a Plan

21 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode, I'm sharing my story of how I went from a broke stay-at-home mom to six-figure entrepreneur - with no plan.  No degree, no career, n...

Ep. 105: The Art of the Midlife Relaunch with Hilary DeCesare

16 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

What if the biggest challenges in your life weren't meant to break you....but to relaunch you?  In today's episode, I sit down with Hilary DeCesare -...

Episode 104: From Breakdown to Burn: How to Turn 'F**k This' Into Your Wildest Rise Yet

09 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

You fed up yet?  Good. That means the fire's here.  In this solo episode, I take you deep into a recent moment where I finally said enough - and bur...

The ALTARed State: A Raw Invitation to Pleasure, Power & Presence

02 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

This isn't a wellness chat about sobriety.  This is a full-body transmission from inside The Altared State - my 30-day ritual of choosing presence ov...

Episode 102: Swallowed Truths & Other Lies We Called Love

26 May 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Hey Selfies,  This one's for the woman who stayed too long.  The woman who confused disappearing with devotion.  The woman who swallowed her truth ...

Episode 101: Make Money in your soft era: feminine flow & wild wealth with Jennifer Whitaker

19 May 2025

Contributed by Lukas

In this week's episode I'm joined by feminine business coach and founder of the Earth Flow Method, Jennifer Whitaker, for a grounded, soul-shifting co...

Episode 100! This is the Moment When Everything Changes

12 May 2025

Contributed by Lukas

One hundred episodes ago, I hit record.  I didn't know where it would lead - only that something in me had to break free.  Today, it's not a celebra...

Episode 99: Exhausted and over it: Stop performing already!

05 May 2025

Contributed by Lukas

If you feel drained, depleted, and like no matter how much rest you get, you're still exhausted....you're not alone!  You're not tired because life i...

Episode 98: Out of Office: Why rest is the new power move

28 Apr 2025

Contributed by Lukas

In this bonus episode, I'm coming to you with sand in my suitcase and rebellion in my bones.  Let's talk about the guilt we feel when we rest. The fe...

Episode 97: The Patriarchy is not your god: living powerfully starts here

20 Apr 2025

Contributed by Lukas

In this fiery sermon of an episode, I'm pulling no punches. We're talking about the invisible leash of patriarchal conditioning and how it keeps power...

Episode 96: Tethered - if you're still thinking about them, you're not crazy.

14 Apr 2025

Contributed by Lukas

You said you were done.  You blocked them. You deleted the photos.  You told yourself, "I've moved on"  But if you're still feeling the ache, still...

Episode 95: Good girls die bitter: Rewrite your eulogy

05 Apr 2025

Contributed by Lukas

What if the reason you feel stuck, numb, or unfulfilled isn't because you're broken, but because the 'good girl' inside you needs to die?  In this fi...

Episode 94: Selfless is a Scam: Why putting everyone first is ruining your life

02 Apr 2025

Contributed by Lukas

This episode is for every woman who's ever felt guilty about putting herself first.  I'm calling out the 'selfless' lie we've been sold, and the emot...

Episode 93: Career, Confidence & Change with Lata Hamilton

23 Mar 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Are you ready to step into the next chapter of your life with confidence, power and purpose? In this episode I sit down with Lata Hamilton, a Change L...

Breaking the Fear Loop: A Selfish Woman's Guide to Bold Moves

11 Mar 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Fear and self-doubt have been running the show for too long. They keep you stuck second-guessing yourself, and playing small. But what if you could fi...

Divorce Like a Boss: Own the Strategy, Rewrite the Story with Karen Covy

17 Feb 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Divorce isn't just an ending - it's a transition, and how you navigate it can set the stage for the rest of your life. In this episode, I'm sitting do...

Why 2025 is the Year You Say F*ck It and Finally Choose You

30 Jan 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Are you ready to make 2025 the year you fully step into your power, prioritize your happiness, and create the life you truly desire? I'm diving into w...

The Selfish Year Begins: A Ritual to Release, Remember and Rise

02 Jan 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Listen if you're ready to leave behind the woman you were never meant to be.  This episode is not about setting cute resolutions. It's about burning ...

Episode 88: Divorce and Dollars: Expert Financial Advice with Jennifer Lee

02 Dec 2024

Contributed by Lukas

This week's episode is for you, if you're considering divorce or navigating through the process, and the very idea of finances gives you anxiety!  We...

Episode 87: Breaking Point: The top 10 reasons marriages end

14 Nov 2024

Contributed by Lukas

As we head into the holiday season, you might be feeling like you're hanging on by a thread, holding it together for the family, and wondering if you ...

Episode 86: When things go wrong: turning setbacks into powerful comebacks

07 Oct 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Continuing from the previous episode when I talked about Hurricane Helene wrecking my plans, I dive deeper into my life mantra "everything works out" ...

Episode 85: Why being Selfish is the key to your next big uplevel

21 Sep 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Do you feel confused, frustrated or discouraged because you're not seeing the results you want yet?  If so, this episode is for you!  I'm sharing my...

Episode 84: What's on Your Bullsh*t List?

29 Aug 2024

Contributed by Lukas

There's one thing I know for sure: anyone who's ever gone through transformational change, first had to get tired of their own bullshit.  If you're t...

Episode 83: It's GLOW Time!

20 Aug 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Are you ready for your Inner Glow Up?  If you're tired of feeling lacklustre, bored, overwhelmed, and just going through the motions in your life.......

Episode 82: Breaking up, Starting Over & Finding the Lessons with WOMEN Author Chloe Caldwell

21 Jul 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Have you ever looked back on a relationship and thought to yourself, 'well that was crazy'? And wondered what you were thinking, and what you could po...

Episode 81: Man vs Bear, the viral TikTok debate, and a man's perspective with Katie & Jay Fillmore

06 Jun 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Our very first man is on the pod!!!  In this episode, I sit down with Katie and Jay Fillmore, and discuss the latest viral debate that's got everyone...

Episode 80: The Journey Inward: Trusting your intuition & taking action

02 May 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Do you feel stuck, trapped, frustrated in life? Do you know what you need to do, but you're not doing it?  Do you feel confused by all the chatter in...

Episode 79: How to stop caring what people think!

20 Apr 2024

Contributed by Lukas

One of the questions I get asked the most, is this:  How do I stop caring what people think???  I'm bringing some tough love, so put on your big gir...

Episode 78: Why you've lost interest...expanding on my viral TikTok!

13 Apr 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Who knew that a three minute video could create such a heated debate between the sexes....about sex!  My TikTok video that went viral a couple of wee...

Episode 77: One woman's healing journey in real time with Crystal Allon

10 Mar 2024

Contributed by Lukas

How do you heal?  The journey of healing is a deeply personal one that requires trial and error, willingness to fail, and finding your guides along t...

Episode 76: Everything you didn't know you needed to know about people pleasing! with Amy Green Smith

25 Feb 2024

Contributed by Lukas

You know that bitch inside your head that keeps telling you to stay quiet, be nice, don't rock the boat and DEFINITELY don't say no if it's gonna upse...

Episode 75: 1 Year Divorce-iversary and the 4 Lessons I Learned

01 Feb 2024

Contributed by Lukas

One year ago I got my divorce papers in the mail.  At the time it was a monumentous occasion! I celebrated big time!  Now, one year later, it's a di...

Episode 74: Don't leave your life to fate - do this instead!

17 Jan 2024

Contributed by Lukas

"I sure hope this year will be better than last year!"  Sound familiar?  If so, you're leaving your life to fate. Hoping that some external force wi...

Episode 73: Your Big Breakthrough

05 Jan 2024

Contributed by Lukas

If you want 2024 to be YOUR year for a big breakthrough, you've gotta fight for it! And I'm here to help you get it!  Don't leave this year to chance...

Episode 72: Holding on for the Holidays - from my heart to yours

10 Dec 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Are you just holding on, waiting for the holidays to be over so that you can restart in January?  Life is challenging, painful, and difficult, and yo...

Episode 71: The D Word: Making the Ultimate Decision About Your Marriage with Kate Antony

08 Nov 2023

Contributed by Lukas

She's baaaack!!!!!  Kate Anthony is back and bringing the truth bombs in this incredible episode!  You may remember Kate from Episode 39 (if not, ma...

Episode 70: He's Moved On...And You're Fuming!

29 Oct 2023

Contributed by Lukas

The relationship is over and before you can even change your status on Facebook to 'single', you see it....the picture of him with someone new. Your h...

Episode 69: Finding Your Purpose by Slowing Down with Candis Williams

09 Sep 2023

Contributed by Lukas

If your life is spinning out of control, everything is moving fast, and you wonder, 'What's the point?' this episode is for you!  It can be hard to c...

Episode 68: Italian Lessons! What I learned on my Summer of Self Love

06 Sep 2023

Contributed by Lukas

I spent two weeks in Italy this summer, travelling alone, and I learned so many lessons about myself, and about life. I'm sharing my biggest take away...

Episode 67: The Magic of Reinventing Yourself with Anna Kloots

23 Jul 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Sometimes you just need a little magic.  That's exactly what today's guest, NYT best selling author Anna Kloots, discovered when her marriage ended a...

Episode 66: Sex, Intimacy & Orgasms: Why it's challenging & what to do about it! with Irene Fehr

15 Jun 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Sexual dynamics between men and women are complicated! It can seem like one big cosmic joke when we try to figure out how to have a healthy, thriving,...

Episode 65: Transforming Failure into Fuel for your Success

04 Jun 2023

Contributed by Lukas

If your fear of failing is keeping you playing small in your life, this episode is for you!  Failure is part of the equation of success and if you're...

Episode 64: Are you a Princess or a Queen? Empowering your relationship with money!

10 May 2023

Contributed by Lukas

It's time to become the Queen of your life, especially with money!  Becoming empowered with money requires you to change your inner relationship with...

Episode 63: Why the F**k NOT You? Kicking Imposter Syndrome's Ass!

24 Apr 2023

Contributed by Lukas

This is one of the most requested topics I get asked to speak about, so let's do this!  Imposter Syndrome is inevitable if you're going for more, bre...

Episode 62: Get Off The F**king Fence! My top ten list for getting un-stuck and into action

06 Apr 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Are you sitting on the fence in some area of your life?  Stuck in indecision? One foot in, one foot out, and waiting for something to happen that wil...

Episode 61: The SW Protocol: Two practical ways you can be a Selfish Woman every day

21 Mar 2023

Contributed by Lukas

I'm coming in hot off the Midlife Reinvention Workshop, and sharing some of the questions the women brought to the call because I know you'll be able ...

Episode 60: WTF is Inner Child Work?

08 Mar 2023

Contributed by Lukas

WTF is inner child work...and why does it matter?  There's a lot of confusion around the term 'inner child'. It can seem 'woo woo', weird, mysterious...

Episode 59: Doing the Impossible: Why I stayed ten years too long

19 Feb 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Whatever's going on in your life, I know you will relate to this episode.  I'm sharing the top four reasons why I stayed ten years too long in my mar...

Episode 58: Buy your own damn flowers! Miley, Men & Midlife

05 Feb 2023

Contributed by Lukas

I'm all fired up about Miley Cyrus' new song, Flowers! (new anthem for the podcast?)  This song is resonating with women all over the world and it's ...

Episode 56: Your Freedom isn't free! What it costs and how to get it

18 Jan 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Freedom!!!  I talk to thousands of women, and when I ask them what they want the most, this is the resounding answer.  You want to be free!  Whatev...

Episode 57: The power of the Pivot: Giving yourself extravagant permission with Kate House

16 Dec 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Join this vibrant conversation with Kate House as we discuss SO many juicy topics!  This episode is like sitting in on a girlfriend's chat! Kate and ...

Episode 55: Forget New Years resolutions - do this instead!

15 Dec 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Studies show that New Years resolutions don't work. I'm sharing a simple practice that I've been doing every year for awhile now, and how it's been a ...

Episode 54: Holiday SOS! Tis the season....for stress?

15 Dec 2022

Contributed by Lukas

I get a lot of SOS calls from clients as the holiday season approaches! Burn out, exhaustion, overwhelm, resentment, anger.....not exactly 'festive'! ...

Episode 56: Behind the scenes of a client's journey!

10 Dec 2022

Contributed by Lukas

I'm pulling back the curtain! Join me and my amazing client Lee'a, as we discuss her incredible journey of transformation and the results she experien...

Episode 53: New level, new devil! Why you might feel discouraged and what to do about it

03 Dec 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Do you ever feel like growth is 2 steps forward, 3 steps back? Like you're making headway, seeing results, and then whammo....you're right back where ...

Episode 52: I lost my new phone and it was the best thing ever!

25 Nov 2022

Contributed by Lukas

I lost my brand new phone last week and I just had to share the story with you!  Why was it the best thing ever?  Because it reminded me of three ma...

Episode 51: The Midlife Pivot with Stacey Birch

17 Nov 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Do you dream about making a big change? Wonder what it would be like to completely pivot your life, break free from everything familiar, and start fre...

Episode 50: Your Inner GPS: User's Manual!

11 Nov 2022

Contributed by Lukas

You have an inner GPS and it's the key to creating what you want. But if you don't know how to find it, or how to use it, you're going to waste a lot ...

Episode 49: Why you need to be delusional: Change the way you think to create what you want

06 Nov 2022

Contributed by Lukas

You can't create an incredible life if you don't feel incredible now.  Waiting to 'feel' it? You'll be waiting forever.  You have to download the be...

Episode 48: From lone wolves to soul sisters: Why we need safe communities with Leslie Saglio

31 Oct 2022

Contributed by Lukas

We're all working on our healing and growth, and it sure can be lonely at times. But it doesn't have to be!  Leslie Saglio and I discuss why women ha...

Episode 47: Apple pie, rage rooms, and the humour in our humanness with Jen Rafferty

16 Oct 2022

Contributed by Lukas

A special kind of magic happened when Jen and I sat together for this talk.  The kind of magic that occurs when women connect on so many levels and s...

Episode 46: Are you hungry? Why it matters!

07 Oct 2022

Contributed by Lukas

You're hungry for more. You have longings, desires, dreams.  Your hunger may have been buried under obligation, responsibility, duty, people pleasing...

Episode 45: The real deal true things with Vivian Kaye

26 Sep 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Do you wish you could say out loud all the things you're thinking? But you hold it in because you've been raised to be the good girl, the nice one, th...

Episode 44: There's no such thing as an overnight success: my BTS story and why it's good to be gooey

19 Sep 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Let's chat about 'success', shall we?  And how there's no such thing as 'an overnight success'.  Whatever your version of success looks like, in any...

Episode 43: The Power of Women's Stories with Amy & Nancy Harrington

12 Sep 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Our stories are powerful. They inspire, uplift, give hope and remind us we're not alone.  This episode is all about the power and change that happens...

Episode 42: The Art of Reinventing Yourself!

06 Sep 2022

Contributed by Lukas

How I reinvented myself...and how you can too.  Reinvent yourself at any age and any stage!  That woman who's living her best life, free to live aut...

Selfish Summer Strategies #9: Looking back, looking forwards!

29 Aug 2022

Contributed by Lukas

The end of summer is always bittersweet.  Take some time to mark the end of the season with me and then look ahead to what's next!  I'm giving you s...

Selfish Summer Strategies #8: How to be more present and savour every moment!

22 Aug 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Summer is drawing to a close....it always zips by so fast, doesn't it?  All the more reason to practice being present so you don't miss the magical, ...

Selfish Summer Strategies #7: Are You Having Fun Yet?

11 Aug 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Have you forgotten how to have fun? Do you feel like you've lost the 'fun you'?  It's easy for life to become all about the 'to-do list', responsibil...

Selfish Summer Strategies #6: Bust out of Comparison-itis!

26 Jul 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Summer is a tricky season, isn't it? On the one hand we love the weather, vacations and everything that comes with it. On the other hand, we are deali...

Selfish Summer Strategies #5: How to Handle the Hard Days This Summer!

22 Jul 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Let's be real, there's gonna be hard days this summer, just like any other season. And while you're on this journey of creating a Selfish Summer, the ...

Selfish Summer Strategies #4: How to get happier right now!

21 Jul 2022

Contributed by Lukas

You want to be happier! This is the universal desire of every human, and it's our birthright. So why is it so elusive? And how can you possibly feel h...

Selfish Summer Strategies #3: How to have an inspiring summer!

14 Jul 2022

Contributed by Lukas

If you've been feeling a little less than inspired these days, or you want to amp up your inspo this summer, I've got you covered!  Feeling inspired ...