Top Flight Time Machine
Episodes
Dirty Trousers
29 Oct 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Service station moments, lorry drive assimilation, Phil Collins’ teeth, and a countryside pipe blockage.Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.p...
The Melchester Odyssey - Part 87
28 Oct 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Roy turns to cricket to help out an old pal (after expenses are deducted) but soon makes a new enemy. (Rec: 28/1/21)Join the Iron Filings Society: htt...
The Yesterday’s Hero Odyssey - Part 1
27 Oct 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Our dive into what could be the best football film ever begins with some background, some mud, and some bus-drinking. (Rec: 27/1/21) Join the Iro...
History Box - Phil Collins Does Live Aid - Part 2
26 Oct 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Elton’s guest list, We Are The World, getting Princed, a few Kershaws, and the industrial cone. (Rec: 26/1/21)Join the Iron Filings Society: https:/...
Countryside Dog-Sitting
25 Oct 2021
Contributed by Lukas
A giggly city boy heads to the sticks, and post-match interviews at a major funeral.Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.com/topflightti...
Loyd Grossman’s Breakfast Relish
22 Oct 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Burger talk, a broken flange, poker with Roy Orbison, and Scholes apathy.Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.com/topflighttimemachine H...
The Melchester Odyssey - Part 86
21 Oct 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Grandad Sam’s big key, Roy destroys a child in print, a brushing scam, and a story about a manky teddy bear. (Rec: 21/1/21)Join the Iron Filings Soc...
The 2021 Ripley Odyssey - Part 4
20 Oct 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Blob husbandry, mucky texting, service station dogs, the Denmark willy show, and a bang on the head. (Rec: 20/1/21)Join the Iron Filings Society: http...
History Box - Phil Collins Does Live Aid - Part 1
19 Oct 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Jacket issues, Sting takes a dip in the Collins pool, and Phil plans to rehearse a Led Zeppelin set on Concorde.Join the Iron Filings Society: https:/...
Pizza Meh
18 Oct 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Trips to Edinburgh and Liverpool, a religious experience on the Tube, a Keegan shop visit and outdoor cooking.Join the Iron Filings Society: https://w...
Top Flight Tune Machine - 14/08/1974
17 Oct 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Paternal abandonment, package holidays, Noddy Holder’s suitcase, and Sam v Parky. (Rec: 17/1/21)Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.c...
Imaginary Dogs
15 Oct 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Oscar joins us for a bit, a blasé wifi attitude, Lampard cars, and our live tour plans. Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.com/t...
The Melchester Odyssey - Part 85
14 Oct 2021
Contributed by Lukas
As the book ends, there’s a chocolate deal, Vic deals with PTSD, we reassess Allo Allo, and Roy picks up a new ball. (Rec: 14/1/21) Join the Ir...
The 2021 Ripley Odyssey - Part 3
13 Oct 2021
Contributed by Lukas
A yeti carnival, ice fraud, space fraud, Radio 4 kudos, pineapple corkage, and bumming the moon. (Rec: 13/1/21) Join the Iron Filings Socie...
Life Logistics - The £5 Spoon
12 Oct 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Umbrellas, an email mix-up, a meat dress, frozen chips, and educating delivery drivers. (Rec: 12/1/21)Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patre...
Sunday Knockers
11 Oct 2021
Contributed by Lukas
The children are upset, a patio boast, and a National Trust guide is power-played.Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.com/topflighttime...
Turkey v Norway?
08 Oct 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Ethics in football, Tears For Fears, an unsettling text conversation, and some B&M treats are assessed.Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www....
The Melchester Odyssey - Part 84
07 Oct 2021
Contributed by Lukas
The nonsense of TV, the battle for Kenny Logan, painting nudes, and a cache of fancy daggers. (Rec: 7/1/21)Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www....
The 2021 Ripley Odyssey - Part 2
06 Oct 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Our new film plan, standing, strong men, a unicorn puppy, and why being cool is hard work. (Rec: 6/1/21) Join the Iron Filings Society: https://w...
Life Logistics - Doorstep Milk Disgrace
05 Oct 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Snowball-recipient etiquette, importing pig milk, takeaway vouchers, and the joy of fat. (Rec: 5/1/21) Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www...
Trigger Warning: Breathing Discussion
04 Oct 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Parenting burdens, unwelcome questions, Johnson’s pig fires, and James Bond’s mate.Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.com/topfligh...
Europa Fire Shooters
01 Oct 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Arguing on the radio, fleecing the rich, Phil Collins close-up, and some intimate male chat.Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.com/top...
The Melchester Odyssey - Part 83
30 Sep 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Scanning magazines, trapping animals, getting your cat kidnapped by The Wailers, and Grace Jones hands over her knickers. (Rec: 31/12/20)Join the Iron...
The 2021 Ripley Odyssey - Part 1
29 Sep 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Our deep dive into the new Believe It Or Not book begins with matchsticks, a mouth full of balls, fingerless bagpipes, and a qualified romantic. (Rec:...
Life Logistics - Ejector Seat Blame Game
28 Sep 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Being the baddies, opinions, robot vacuum cleaners, talking to strangers, and other stuff. (Rec: 29/12/20)Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.p...
Apple Episode
27 Sep 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Worms in apples, apple pressing, Pinocchio’s apple, and some intense digging (without apples).Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.com...
Top Flight Tune Machine - 04/11/1977 Part 2
26 Sep 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Boney M’s avalanche of peace, one Elvis leaves as another arrives, Elton John has a slap-up feed, and PUNK!Join the Iron Filings Society: https://ww...
Ideas
24 Sep 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Us in meat form, our grab for power, idiot men, the Spice Girls, hardware stores, and knockers.Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.com/...
The Melchester Odyssey - Part 82
23 Sep 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Arrow Petrol, tyre woes, the modern Pirelli calendar, Beeping Timmy leaves a review, and a new dive is announced.Join the Iron Filings Society: https:...
The Twits Odyssey - Part 22
22 Sep 2021
Contributed by Lukas
The odyssey ends, but not before we get caught up in Andy’s post-death sticker album legal woes. Also, twee swearing, Roald regresses, and we examin...
Life Logistics - Bring Back Fat Wallet
21 Sep 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Bank loyalty, credit card machines, middle-class football fans, Yorkshire puddings, and the real Covid heroes. (Rec: 22/12/20)Join the Iron Filings So...
Lee Bowyer’s Wet Trousers
20 Sep 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Godcasting, peaks and troughs, beefy cheese, Northern Soul, and Monster DayJoin the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.com/topflighttimemachine...
Canal Boat Death Wish
17 Sep 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Twelve-hour funeral boozing, a missing bit, a pizza, fantasy quizzing and Billy Bonds’ warm-up.Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.co...
The Melchester Odyssey - Part 81
16 Sep 2021
Contributed by Lukas
A Scotsman with a grudge, getting muddled up, some TV news gossip, hating football, and Will Carling’s CD collection. (Rec: 17/12/20)Join the Iron F...
The Twits Odyssey - Part 21
15 Sep 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Pencil-writing, Lamparding at a car accident, Sam gets his eyes examined, and bonfires. (Rec: 16/12/20)Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patr...
Life Logistics - Lampard Teacher
14 Sep 2021
Contributed by Lukas
'Following policy,' a lamp wrangle, a private tip, tooth dust, a danger wall, and a lost fox. (Rec: 8/12/20)Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www...
Top Flight Tune Machine - 04/11/1977 Part 1
12 Sep 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Threats from Abba, a hospital record stall, a big fish round at Pancho’s, and memories of going to a gig. (Rec: 6/12/20)Join the Iron Filings Societ...
Alley Chat
12 Sep 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Russian garages, alleys, a bush woman, footballer aggression, and a disgusting bowl.Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.com/topflightti...
Favourite Bowl
10 Sep 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Kitchen chat, cat interventions, and stupid travel plans.Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.com/topflighttimemachine Hosted on Acast. ...
The Melchester Odyssey - Part 80
09 Sep 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Roy subs himself off, heads to the nick, solves his own attempted murder, and then heads back before the end of the match. (Rec: 10/12/20)Join the Iro...
The Twits Odyssey - Part 20
08 Sep 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Misdelivered toilet rolls, an accidental horn-parp, Beeping Timmy, a pub gang, and how to write a book. (Rec: 9/12/20)Join the Iron Filings Society: h...
Life Logistics - Dickensian Dream Solicitor
07 Sep 2021
Contributed by Lukas
A bit of dream chat, some doctor-shaming, grudge requests, and wrapping paper annoyances. (Rec: 15/12/20)Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.pa...
Crazy Golf Clash
06 Sep 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Girls Aloud, Gulliver, the Prince Charles walk, Turbo badges, and Sam tries to get himself arrested.Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon...
Hammers Meet Hipsters
03 Sep 2021
Contributed by Lukas
The Abba comeback, a weird Bjork gig, and VR Brown John possibilities.Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.com/topflighttimemachine Host...
The Melchester Odyssey - Part 79
01 Sep 2021
Contributed by Lukas
We discuss Britain’s diminishing wall numbers, Roy wades into the crowd again and drops a ‘habeas corpus’, and Blackie worries about a liaison w...
The Twits Odyssey - Part 19
01 Sep 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Quentin Blake’s colouring-in failures, the fireplace precedent, Roald Dahl’s big sandal, and more.Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patre...
Life Logistics - Deep Fat Frying
31 Aug 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Sleeping, the royal family, covid dating locations, and an indecent Premier Inn proposal.Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.com/topfli...
Top Flight Tune Machine - 28/02/1988 Part 2
30 Aug 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Why Sam hates Johnny Hates Jazz, more American Trousers, rock ‘n roll, duetting with Alexander O’Neal and teenage feminism. (Rec: 22/11/20)Join th...
There’s Nothing Bigger Than Turbo
30 Aug 2021
Contributed by Lukas
A new IFS offering, the dead pop stars pyramid, a sad closure, and a shed office crisis.Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.com/topflig...
RIP Dave Harper
27 Aug 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Europa League draw fever and we tribute to our mate.Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.com/topflighttimemachine Hosted on Acast. See a...
The Melchester Odyssey - Part 78
26 Aug 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Roy’s amazing ear, continental players doing fighting and biting, celebrity interviewing, and Trevor Brinsden in peril. (Rec: 26/11/20)Join the Iron...
The Twits Odyssey - Part 18
25 Aug 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Masks, Shergar, Diana, pyramids, ‘The Irish’, Dahl’s team of nurses and his complex business affairs. (Rec: 25/11/20)Join the Iron Filings Socie...
Life Logistics - School Run Goose
24 Aug 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Anxious pets, streaming TV rated, Christmas cash for kids, and second-guessing wives. (Rec: 24/11/20)Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreo...
The Nature Of Taste
23 Aug 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Consuming matter, dragon eggs, Big Salt strikes again, ignoring calls, and ant/monkey TV.Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.com/topfli...
Posting A Beard To The Queen
20 Aug 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Radio 4, Lebanon hostage biscuits, a card shuffler plea, and a postcode boast.Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.com/topflighttimemach...
The Melchester Odyssey - Part 77
19 Aug 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Roy returns to the pitch and reflects on his father, we have a Swedish TV tip and go in two-footed on ‘The Crown’, and Trevor Brinsden lets his mo...
The Twits Odyssey - Part 17
18 Aug 2021
Contributed by Lukas
A milk spillage, how Hitler REALLY died, The Twits’ influence on The Jam, and the dark ending of this book. (Rec: 18/11/20)Join the Iron Filings Soc...
Life Logistics - Brown John
17 Aug 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Our new TV show idea, weighted blankets, hot bodies, and more cat stuff. (Rec: 17/11/20)Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.com/topflig...
It’s Not Trifle Without Sherry
16 Aug 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Some jaded Covid activity, fighting the maskless, the horror of boarding school, and a toxic osteopath.Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patr...
Top Flight Tune Machine - 28/02/1988 Part 1
15 Aug 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Fear of the pop blob, Neighbours, driving six hours to slag off the radio, The Roxy, and some facts that are probably wrong. (Rec: 8/11/20) Join the I...
Assorted Bird Frenzy
13 Aug 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Fence power-playing, dream chat, the horrors of abroad, a human car, Gordon Bucket, and lazy man-widowing.Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.p...
The Melchester Odyssey - Part 76
12 Aug 2021
Contributed by Lukas
A 1960s flashback, and Roy’s comeback is halted by talk of music centres, catalogues and buying old stuff that we don’t need. (Rec: 12/11/20) Joi...
The Twits Odyssey - Part 16
11 Aug 2021
Contributed by Lukas
A treehouse, a flat-selling power play, an arson threat, and Roland Bird goes to Sainsbury's. (Rec: 11/11/20) Join the Iron Filings Society: https://...
Life Logistics - Blobby Forever
10 Aug 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Manference developments, vegan Christmas, a nut allergy near-tragedy, teapots, and Andy’s dishwasher hell. (Rec: 10/11/20)Join the Iron Filings Soci...
Approved Lamparding
09 Aug 2021
Contributed by Lukas
More frogs, The Six Million Dollar Man doll, making a car, an alternative flat, and a self-policing Luton pub. Join the Iron Filings Society: https://...
Ex-Boss Driveway Request
06 Aug 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Business cards, Kipper Jackson, Michael Barrymore, a holiday drug offer and Florida gun fear.Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.com/to...
The Melchester Odyssey - Part 75
05 Aug 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Bush meat, Phil Collins, Roy gets tested by a German doc, and Penny wants justice as the net closes again. (Rec: 5/11/20)Join the Iron Filings Society...
The Twits Odyssey - Part 15
04 Aug 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Sam’s water glass agony, derelict laundries, the function of the heart, and Roald Dahl is back on the skunk. (Rec: 4/11/20) Join the Iron Filings S...
Life Logistics - Drug Tablet Attitudes
03 Aug 2021
Contributed by Lukas
X Factor, the maddest two minutes of TV ever, Scouse dumps, Nigella Lawson, and Gordon Ramsay. (Rec: 3/11/20)Join the Iron Filings Society: https://ww...
Sausage Talc
02 Aug 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Our open prison dreams revived, a semi-legal Thames ferry, hospital skiving, and a meat pie barber.Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon....
Humans Of Honour/The Reset - Seth Meyers
01 Aug 2021
Contributed by Lukas
We felt that Sam's recent interview with US comedy legend Seth Meyers for his 'The Reset' series was also worthy of 'Humans Of Honour' status - so her...
Literary Drones
30 Jul 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Garden party, private detectives, zoo chat, time travel, Love Island, and Sparks. Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.com/topflighttim...
The Melchester Odyssey - Part 74
29 Jul 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Tiger-based work, Rovers get reckless, a Guardiola takedown, Sir Alf returns, and the net of justice closes. (Rec: 29/10/20) Join the Iron Filings Soc...
The Twits Odyssey - Part 14
28 Jul 2021
Contributed by Lukas
The late 80s rave scene, the folly of BBC podcasting, and cultural snobbery. Approximately 0.006% Twits. (Rec: 28/10/20)Join the Iron Filings Society:...
Life Logistics - Hot Body
27 Jul 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Lots of bed and bedroom-related problems solved, and also the rules about swearing. (Rec: 27/10/20) Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon...
Chopping Wood
26 Jul 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Holiday games rooms, a paddling pool shock, a surprise rake, and a nightmare neighbour. Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.com/topfli...
Top Flight Tune Machine – 18/02/1987 Part 2
25 Jul 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Ben Vol-au-vent Parrot, Andy Warhol, premature baldness, a defence of Jamiroquai, better languages and a UB40 superfan. (Rec: 18/10/20)Join the Iron F...
Dogs And Swords
23 Jul 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Squandering money, losing stuff, a classic stray man, good guys of Barnes, and unusual smoking.Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.com/...
The Melchester Odyssey - Part 73
22 Jul 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Jack Charlton schools Sue Lawley, the decline of steam, Duncan McKay’s parenting thoughts, and a psycho PE teacher. (Rec: 22/10/20) Join the Iron Fi...
The Twits Odyssey - Part 13
21 Jul 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Steve Jobs’ original iPhone plans, pub ashtrays, 1980s Tory cuts, tortoises and Dahl vs Blue Peter. (Rec: 21/10/20) Join the Iron Filings Society: h...
Life Logistics - Rogue Cockerel
20 Jul 2021
Contributed by Lukas
The nature of cults, pancake prison, body image, cat theft, and rip-off publishing. (Rec: 20/10/20)Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon....
Seagull Blood On The Ottoman
19 Jul 2021
Contributed by Lukas
A mailbag delve, unleashing your inner kid, three courses of ravioli, targeted wasps, and asking people stuff. Join the Iron Filings Society: ht...
Storming Parkhead
16 Jul 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Holiday plans, a silent retreat, an ill-advised flight booking, and more of Roger Taylor’s consumer tips. Join the Iron Filings Society: https://ww...
The Melchester Odyssey - Part 72
15 Jul 2021
Contributed by Lukas
An underwhelming surprise, plans for a set-up, a golden ball, garden potato fun, and Rovers get carried away. (Rec: 15/10/20)Join the Iron Filings Soc...
The Twits Odyssey - Part 12
14 Jul 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Dark money in British politics and a 17-minute monologue by the Roly-Poly Bird. (Rec: 14/10/20) Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.com...
Life Logistics - Collymore v Ice
13 Jul 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Bros on Ethiopia, why toffs run reality TV, David Beckham gets tricked, pies, bridges, and sexy fridges. (Rec: 13/10/20)Join the Iron Filings Society:...
Our Laughing Boy King
12 Jul 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Fatherly advice, river talk, seaside drills, and England stuff.Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.com/topflighttimemachine Hosted on A...
Top Flight Tune Machine - 18/02/1987 Part 1
11 Jul 2021
Contributed by Lukas
American trousers, dressing like the rappers, Geordie Jeans, our live singing history and podding for ghosts. (Rec: 4/10/20)Join the Iron Filings Soci...
Samajesty’s Going To Dover
09 Jul 2021
Contributed by Lukas
England, Covid, a costume, a hired bus, online campaigning, and Diana’s statue. Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.com/topflighttime...
The Melchester Odyssey - Part 71
08 Jul 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Roy and Sir Alf finally meet, we ponder the human mind, the net closes, and there’s no team talk. (Rec: 8/10/20)Join the Iron Filings Society: https...
The Twits Odyssey - Part 11
07 Jul 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Roald Dahl smokes something he shouldn’t round the back of The Feathers and hires a giraffe. (Rec: 7/10/20)Join the Iron Filings Society: https://ww...
Life Logistics - Cooking Therapy
06 Jul 2021
Contributed by Lukas
A lazy colleague, a probation period fail, reach and wash feedback, a weird farming rant, and Netflix etiquette. (Rec: 6/10/20)Join the Iron Filings S...
Peanuts For Breakfast
05 Jul 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Some England football content, the power of salt, and we solicit your feedback.Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.com/topflighttimemac...
Sam’s Balls
02 Jul 2021
Contributed by Lukas
England indifference vs dressing up as a crusader. Also, erm… Sam’s balls.Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.com/topflighttimemach...
The Melchester Odyssey - Part 70
01 Jul 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Roy is disgustingly fit, there’s a bit of Basran, a jetty opening, a sex reference, and Red Plane vs Yellow Plane. (Rec: 1/10/20)Join the Iron Filin...
The Twits Odyssey - Part 10
30 Jun 2021
Contributed by Lukas
The Twits head off for guns, there’s some Ask Attenborough, the Roly Poly Bird explores the shed, and the monkeys reveal their plan. (Rec: 30/9/20)J...
Life Logistics - Thanks For Hands, God
29 Jun 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Michael Barrymore raps, working from home, cockerels, reach and wash, and cross-pod eyebrow chat. (Rec: 29/9/20) Join the Iron Filings Society: h...
Adult Chases
28 Jun 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Spy doorbells, hiding, cowardice and the Matt Hancock saga is assessed.Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.com/topflighttimemachine Hos...
Top Flight Tune Machine - 20th May 1998
27 Jun 2021
Contributed by Lukas
A rotten, rotten top 40, violent plants, some Britpop squabbling, and Anthony Kiedis visits Sunderland to hunt down Andy. (Rec: 20/9/20)Join the Iron ...
The Swedish Swan Man
25 Jun 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Simulcharging, knee-squeezing, living for content, local characters, and tree murder.Join the Iron Filings Society: https://www.patreon.com/topflightt...