Top Flight Time Machine

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 24

12 Aug 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Rovers fans gather outside Roy’s house before he takes the chopper to the big relegation match. Plus there’s a mystery sub and the joy of self-com...

Cinema Snack Fiasco

10 Aug 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Dating advice, wood acquisition, and Glen A Larson gets annoyed about Michael Knight’s twin’s face. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for mor...

Van Day

07 Aug 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Van-manning, paint disposal, a fireworks cabinet, losing some metal, Lance Armstrong, and the hammock life. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for...

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 23

05 Aug 2020

Contributed by Lukas

A close look at Peter Bowles… oh, and Roy invents gaslighting, donates his old telly to Rovers and faces an unlikely relegation-dodging task. (Rec: ...

Roger Taylor’s Dishoom Voucher

03 Aug 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Escaped cows, bush journalism, hotel fire alarms, a godfather gift and more. (NB: We both agreed that this was a lovely episode) Hosted on Acast. See ...

Best Times/Worst Times

31 Jul 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Pies, cream teas, Morecambe & Wise, an exploding head, painting, and more. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 22

29 Jul 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Some pomp, Elton John’s sex logistics, and Roy plans a move to London. (Rec: 31/10/2019) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information...

Top Dollar or Casual Bloke?

27 Jul 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Dressing room celebrations, smelting racist statues, monkey mayhem, and being policed by our children. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more...

Split From Split

24 Jul 2020

Contributed by Lukas

A hidden laptop, a burning boat, shell theft, the threat of jail, and a dramatic predicting climax. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more in...

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 21

22 Jul 2020

Contributed by Lukas

With hordes of Rovers fans locked outside the ground, Roy gives some friendly advice to opposing captain Don Jeavons and plans retirement in the Lake ...

The Air

20 Jul 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Driving a 60s Jag with a train robber, sound issues, Souness and Wilkins in Italy, and Bielsa in the Premier League. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/pr...

Smelting

17 Jul 2020

Contributed by Lukas

The Xerox saga reaches a conclusion and we hatch some new plans involving gold and Victorian grave-plundering. Plus shape-throwing and Toy Day. Hosted...

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 20

15 Jul 2020

Contributed by Lukas

The terror of serious illness, a new throw-in podcast, a crooked ref, a nice meal out for the Race family & dressing room hi-jinks. (Recorded 19/1...

Ortolan Zeitgeist

13 Jul 2020

Contributed by Lukas

A mailbag update, some advice for Johnny Depp, songbird consumption cosmos stuff, and our new woodland campaign. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privac...

Louie?

10 Jul 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Thermos flasks, Facebook birth wrongness, a shock Leniverse appointment and some predictions. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more informat...

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 19

08 Jul 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Some exhausting shooting practice followed by a surprise spectator at Melchester v Zalmo in the European Cup… (Recorded 10/10/2019) Hosted on Acast....

IFS Big Week

06 Jul 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Dishing out insults, predicting tactics, Chip Sunday, a Victorian graveyard, and Ennio Morricone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more info...

ResultsBot and ERNIE

03 Jul 2020

Contributed by Lukas

A lockdown houseguest, some stunning Leniverse news, a barefoot street chase, and Russian toes. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more inform...

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 18

02 Jul 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Roy covets Blackie Gray’s wife and considers widowship while enjoying The Dukes of Hazzard and burning his clothes. (Recorded 02/10/2019) Hosted on ...

Andy Three-Hammocks

29 Jun 2020

Contributed by Lukas

New words to Liverpool from the rappers, leaving a speech in the pub (but not the pub that Pele is in), seagulls eating other animals, and crow grudge...

Business Geese

26 Jun 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Kenny Dalglish’s phone, a TFTM drummer, hammocks, penguins, and sleeping over a rope.  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more informat...

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 17

25 Jun 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Roy wears himself out while trying to crush Rotherton and almost dies from sadness, but not before inspiring the rest of the Melchester team. (Recorde...

The Xerox Perpetuity

22 Jun 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Photocopier torment, ResultsBot’s COVID nightmare, a Premier League look back and a vaccine theory. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more ...

Humans of Honour - Mick Talbot

20 Jun 2020

Contributed by Lukas

He's the keyboard king who was 50% of The Style Council and enjoyed spells with Dexy's Midnight Runners and Roger Daltrey and Wilko Johnson - and we'v...

Personal Ice Cream Service

19 Jun 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Mad dads, a softball/golfer altercation, postman tales, and some buried money. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 16

18 Jun 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Roy has a shave and gets out on the pitch to try and get over Penny, with his players all talking behind his back. (Recorded 19/09/2019) Hosted on Aca...

SAS BBQ

17 Jun 2020

Contributed by Lukas

This was going to be a Keegan Hamburg Odyssey episode but we got sidetracked. Includes self-immolation, Raoul Moat, One Direction and the dark net. Ho...

Paternal Hand-Holding

15 Jun 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Insomnia, a night accident, drunk injuries, lung capacity, massive cosmos stuff, and the predictions are back. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy ...

Ripley & Wilcox Clone Army

12 Jun 2020

Contributed by Lukas

La Liga, Geoffrey Chichester, Morrissey, telly tips, and wart removal. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 15

11 Jun 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Penny storms off to her mother's and Roy enjoys being home alone. For a while... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Humans of Honour - Stan Hey

08 Jun 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Our interview with the writer whose credits include Auf Wiedersehen Pet, The Manageress, Spender and a host of official World Cup films. Hosted on Aca...

Up The Gelato

08 Jun 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Banning fans from football, ice cream queuing and the cosmos, and a couple of new games. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Grandad’s Football Boast

05 Jun 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Family Zoom quizzes, documentaries, framing a newspaper cutting, Hoddle & Waddle’s flop follow-up, and private detectives. Hosted on Acast. See ...

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 14

04 Jun 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Roy holds a successful snowbound Sunday training session, but trouble is brewing at home. And where is Ernie Gosden in 2019? Hosted on Acast. See acas...

A View To A Kill

03 Jun 2020

Contributed by Lukas

In his new 80's movie podcast Sam Delaney joins his cousin Bruce to look back at the only Bond movie to use a plotline stolen from Minder, an elderly ...

Train Beer Teacher

01 Jun 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Court self-defending, Don Arden, cat prosecco, crow tactics and supplementing an educational income. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more i...

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 13

31 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Nat Gosden’s awful kids get in the dressing room and start mouthing off. Roy tries to arrange a child-swap, and sets up a Sunday session across the ...

It’s Back!

29 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

The return of the Premier League, trending on Twitter, and lifting Babs Windsor above your head. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more infor...

Voyeur Stag

25 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Unwanted park attention, the shady influence of Big Crow, a spooky mystery, and the Dominic Cummings conundrum solved. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/...

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 12

22 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Nat Gosden makes his Rovers debut, the nightmare of your ROTR issue not arriving in time, and Sunderland’s gated compounds. Hosted on Acast. See aca...

Salmon Buttons

22 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Pet treats, mug relationships, family crests, party pants catastrophe, nut chat, and a sad desert island fantasy. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/priva...

The Spirit of Lonely Water

18 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

True dog love, Minder, Tyson, Strummer on swimming, a Scouse night out and Wednesday night’s plans. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more ...

Hail Zito Morco

15 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

A much-needed Earth Tournament update, a Biscoff development, a sunflower crime, and another TFTM Man of Honour. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privac...

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 11

14 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Roy visits a kiddy hospital on Christmas Day, hits the release catch, and makes a stunning signing for Rovers... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privac...

New Fox

11 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Over-caffeining, meeting your heroes, garage boxing, more crow stuff, and an unusual house guest. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more info...

The New Normal

08 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Back to the vets, cat valium, Pancho’s retail needs, teenage bush discovery, and some digging chat. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more ...

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 10

07 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Roy has a post-match showdown and Roy Jr turns into an apple dog witch. Meanwhile, is China controlling our wind? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/priva...

Biscuit Biscuits

04 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

The evil that crows do, a Nelson update, dog-shaving, shopping for Pancho and the truth about Shilton. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more...

The Charity Safety Net

01 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Tubby youth abuse, a Nelson tail update, puppy prep, and an 80s TV monster. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 9

30 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Geoff Giles continues to torment Roy, who is more concerned with circumcision and presenting his plans for the nation to Mrs Thatcher. Meanwhile, the ...

Wonderful Things

27 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Camper vans, Lamparding at festivals, private podding for Jay Kay, our posthumous episode plans, and Prince. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy fo...

When Cows Disappeared

26 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Our thoughts on the Egyptians and Japan, how TFTM will end, fishcakes revisited, and homemade crisps. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more ...

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 8

23 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Racey has a sausage-fuelled nightmare – but can salvation arrive in the form of Lorraine Chase? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more info...

Hot Mouth USA

22 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

A tail update, toastie-maker disposal, a worm win, and two different mentions of dinosaurs. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more informatio...

Sexy Burglar

21 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Paranoia, loss adjustment, celebrity rigs, our dream Prime Minister, and cat tail horror. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Lonely Mountain Wind

20 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Mental health top-ups, the Nuttall Test, the worst sporting figures, and potato formats. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Little Elvis & Robocop

17 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Sheffield Wednesday, Spud-U-Like and some other stuff… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 7

16 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

We meet Victor Boskovic, discuss curly cables and Ben Galloway’s dreamland. Meanwhile, Roy pins his hopes on a trembling teenage keeper… Hosted on...

The Pressures Of Podding

14 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Addictive behaviour, a Euro 92 cuckolding update, astronomy, and Len’s Q&A. (Apologies for Sam’s robot voice for the first 12 mins of this) Ho...

Euro 92 Nightmare

10 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Chippy tea deliveries, some incredible Earth Tournament updates, and Sam’s sadness after getting the snacks in 28 years ago. Hosted on Acast. See ac...

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 6

09 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

As his goalie has a breakdown, Roy fends off a tirade of fan abuse. Back at home, we see the Race family's space-age telly as concerns grow for Roy Jr...

Egg Uber

07 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Shopping, slippers, Sir John Asos, Baileys, an Earth Tournament update, some lies and weirdness, and roof tasering. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/pri...

Thank You Belgian Scientist

06 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Baking bread, a near-triggering, rugby horror, water cannons, swords and guess what’s back…? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more infor...

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 5

02 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Charlie Carter has a mare, Paco Diaz gives it some dis ‘n’ dat, and Roy tries to salvage glory from disaster and Cretan revenge. Hosted on Acast. ...

Wasp Bus

01 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

An ice cube, Canada, footballer initiation retaliations, and more of your weirdest sightings. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more informat...

Weirdest Things

31 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Mainly a round-up of the weirdest things you’ve seen. Some great, some average, some awful. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more informat...

The Zen Of Tidying Up

30 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

How housework is filling the void, the strangest things we’ve ever seen, our plans to breed and flog tiger cubs, and women’s hairstyles. Hosted on...

Leave It To Cosmos

27 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Our two year isolation prep, a live cuppa delivery, a Raab attack, the best news in months, and the magic of Tiger King. Hosted on Acast. See acast.co...

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 4

26 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

A farewell lunch gets out of hand, a there’s generic fans protest, Roy rips off his rivals, and Rovers’ season goes from bad to worse… Hosted on...

Trump’s Badgers

24 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Some begging, ghost neighbours, tigers, virus rumours and Lamparding the lockdown. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Bird Exploitation

23 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Home schooling, pandemic exercising, a doctor’s advice, panic buying, World Cup movies and our next odyssey is revealed… Hosted on Acast. See acas...

Shut The Pubs!

20 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

We’ve made a viral video which prompted the government to give everyone free cash – how will this affect ResultBot’s robot money pipe? Hosted on...

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 3

19 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Roy drops a transfer bombshell, the Portdean fans run wild at Melboro, we meet Penny Race and Roy gets his chopper out… Hosted on Acast. See acast.c...

Glass Special

18 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Just what happened when Sam took a bag of glass shards home? Plus a bit of John Cosmos and some pharmacist news… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/priv...

Scholes Or Varney?

17 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Our finest Talksport moment, plus Sam goes up the storage and gets sucked into panic-buying. Tomorrow… the broken glass story… Hosted on Acast. Se...

Introducing Your Lay Scientists

15 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

How Dad’s Army can help us through the crisis, Sir John Corona, anonymous Lampards, playground virus info, and knocking up some ventilators… Hoste...

Shopping Parasite

14 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Isolation, Jackie Chan’s lock-up, some content recommendations, and a load of Joe Pasquales. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more informa...

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 2

12 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Roy waxes lyrical about the olive kebab, there’s some bungling and a rotten ref, and Roy and Blackie’s lock-in tactics are revealed…  Hoste...

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 1

12 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Our new Roy of the Rovers 1980s deep dive gets underway. Two lads go from car park shovelling to first team starts, while another pair have an on-pitc...

Bum Wasps

10 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Instagram purchasing addiction, our Corona profiteering plans, and inventive toilet roll alternatives. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more...

Your Weekend Is Yours

06 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Some old snooker music, being bionic, some Coronavirus news, more teapots, Jack Hargreaves, and new Space Robbers. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/priv...

The QPR Murders

03 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

A bit of John Cosmos, sexy telly, the Bristow story, a news jotter and more Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Nan And The Cup Final Ticket

03 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

How to act tough in a chippy, Biscoff love and Eric Bristow gets A Question of Sport wrong. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more informatio...

Manference Is Go!

28 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Plans for our conference (Coronageddon permitting), speed-mentoring, hand gel panic-buying, bridging snack woes and more… Hosted on Acast. See acast...

Long Dinner

24 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Our Radio 4 takeover plans, a trip to a Noel Coward play, hotel reviews, and Tyson Fury. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Dawson Stance

21 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Sam looks forward to a birthday party and remembers upsetting Amanda Holden. We also get some cashpoint safety tips. (Apologies for the sound issues) ...

Hateful Neighbours

18 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

A look about outdoors, bins, Sir John God’s wrath, riddles, and war animals. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Pub Car Park

17 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Sam’s first OB, Tears For Fears, some Lamparding, prosthetics, and the end of civilisation. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more informat...

Dental Nightmare

15 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Cheese, Delaney letters to West Ham, part two of Space Robbers, some more cosmos stuff, and an Apple naming crisis… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/p...

The Football Episode

14 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Tactics, predictions, and our recent brush with the upper classes - almost 100% football content. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more info...

Identical Shep

11 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Tom & Jerry, Stubby the war dog, more Blue Peter revelations and a first-hand encounter with Wojtek. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for mo...

Russian Sunday Dinner

10 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Freelancing versus the foundry, a showbiz party, a fat black cat update and a local busybody website. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more ...

Dental Hijacking

07 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Sam’s hygienist tries to entice him, we celebrate John Noakes, hear more from the cosmos and start a choose-your-own-adventure…  Hosted on Ac...

Almost Live From Leeds

04 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Backstage at our latest live show, a mailbag delve, the cosmos, some riddles, and Scotland’s best bear. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for m...

Almost Live From London

03 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Backstage at our live show, we talk about our pre-show rituals, and hear about The God Diet and self-hating Londoners. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/...

Fat Black Cat

31 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

A feline encounter goes weird, why we should all have more tea, and some football predictions... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more infor...

Guts Cod

28 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Some listener Lamparding, football haters, crabbing horror, rig servicing, non-books, and a struggle with a riddle. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/pri...

Car Sleeping

27 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Sticking with dull books, studio construction, and dubious street transactions… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Doncaster Services

24 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

A shorter than usual episode with predictions, a non-dead man, and Sam’s musings on his week Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more informa...

Bigger Than JFK

21 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Ongoing personal highs and lows, some fine riddle work and a bit of actual football chat… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more informatio...