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Top Flight Time Machine

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Episodes

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The Melchester Odyssey - Part 13

31 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Nat Gosden’s awful kids get in the dressing room and start mouthing off. Roy tries to arrange a child-swap, and sets up a Sunday session across the ...

It’s Back!

29 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

The return of the Premier League, trending on Twitter, and lifting Babs Windsor above your head. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more infor...

Voyeur Stag

25 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Unwanted park attention, the shady influence of Big Crow, a spooky mystery, and the Dominic Cummings conundrum solved. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/...

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 12

22 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Nat Gosden makes his Rovers debut, the nightmare of your ROTR issue not arriving in time, and Sunderland’s gated compounds. Hosted on Acast. See aca...

Salmon Buttons

22 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Pet treats, mug relationships, family crests, party pants catastrophe, nut chat, and a sad desert island fantasy. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/priva...

The Spirit of Lonely Water

18 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

True dog love, Minder, Tyson, Strummer on swimming, a Scouse night out and Wednesday night’s plans. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more ...

Hail Zito Morco

15 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

A much-needed Earth Tournament update, a Biscoff development, a sunflower crime, and another TFTM Man of Honour. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privac...

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 11

14 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Roy visits a kiddy hospital on Christmas Day, hits the release catch, and makes a stunning signing for Rovers... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privac...

New Fox

11 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Over-caffeining, meeting your heroes, garage boxing, more crow stuff, and an unusual house guest. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more info...

The New Normal

08 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Back to the vets, cat valium, Pancho’s retail needs, teenage bush discovery, and some digging chat. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more ...

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 10

07 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Roy has a post-match showdown and Roy Jr turns into an apple dog witch. Meanwhile, is China controlling our wind? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/priva...

Biscuit Biscuits

04 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

The evil that crows do, a Nelson update, dog-shaving, shopping for Pancho and the truth about Shilton. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more...

The Charity Safety Net

01 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Tubby youth abuse, a Nelson tail update, puppy prep, and an 80s TV monster. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 9

30 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Geoff Giles continues to torment Roy, who is more concerned with circumcision and presenting his plans for the nation to Mrs Thatcher. Meanwhile, the ...

Wonderful Things

27 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Camper vans, Lamparding at festivals, private podding for Jay Kay, our posthumous episode plans, and Prince. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy fo...

When Cows Disappeared

26 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Our thoughts on the Egyptians and Japan, how TFTM will end, fishcakes revisited, and homemade crisps. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more ...

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 8

23 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Racey has a sausage-fuelled nightmare – but can salvation arrive in the form of Lorraine Chase? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more info...

Hot Mouth USA

22 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

A tail update, toastie-maker disposal, a worm win, and two different mentions of dinosaurs. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more informatio...

Sexy Burglar

21 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Paranoia, loss adjustment, celebrity rigs, our dream Prime Minister, and cat tail horror. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Lonely Mountain Wind

20 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Mental health top-ups, the Nuttall Test, the worst sporting figures, and potato formats. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Little Elvis & Robocop

17 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Sheffield Wednesday, Spud-U-Like and some other stuff… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 7

16 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

We meet Victor Boskovic, discuss curly cables and Ben Galloway’s dreamland. Meanwhile, Roy pins his hopes on a trembling teenage keeper… Hosted on...

The Pressures Of Podding

14 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Addictive behaviour, a Euro 92 cuckolding update, astronomy, and Len’s Q&A. (Apologies for Sam’s robot voice for the first 12 mins of this) Ho...

Euro 92 Nightmare

10 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Chippy tea deliveries, some incredible Earth Tournament updates, and Sam’s sadness after getting the snacks in 28 years ago. Hosted on Acast. See ac...

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 6

09 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

As his goalie has a breakdown, Roy fends off a tirade of fan abuse. Back at home, we see the Race family's space-age telly as concerns grow for Roy Jr...

Egg Uber

07 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Shopping, slippers, Sir John Asos, Baileys, an Earth Tournament update, some lies and weirdness, and roof tasering. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/pri...

Thank You Belgian Scientist

06 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Baking bread, a near-triggering, rugby horror, water cannons, swords and guess what’s back…? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more infor...

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 5

02 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Charlie Carter has a mare, Paco Diaz gives it some dis ‘n’ dat, and Roy tries to salvage glory from disaster and Cretan revenge. Hosted on Acast. ...

Wasp Bus

01 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

An ice cube, Canada, footballer initiation retaliations, and more of your weirdest sightings. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more informat...

Weirdest Things

31 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Mainly a round-up of the weirdest things you’ve seen. Some great, some average, some awful. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more informat...

The Zen Of Tidying Up

30 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

How housework is filling the void, the strangest things we’ve ever seen, our plans to breed and flog tiger cubs, and women’s hairstyles. Hosted on...

Leave It To Cosmos

27 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Our two year isolation prep, a live cuppa delivery, a Raab attack, the best news in months, and the magic of Tiger King. Hosted on Acast. See acast.co...

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 4

26 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

A farewell lunch gets out of hand, a there’s generic fans protest, Roy rips off his rivals, and Rovers’ season goes from bad to worse… Hosted on...

Trump’s Badgers

24 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Some begging, ghost neighbours, tigers, virus rumours and Lamparding the lockdown. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Bird Exploitation

23 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Home schooling, pandemic exercising, a doctor’s advice, panic buying, World Cup movies and our next odyssey is revealed… Hosted on Acast. See acas...

Shut The Pubs!

20 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

We’ve made a viral video which prompted the government to give everyone free cash – how will this affect ResultBot’s robot money pipe? Hosted on...

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 3

19 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Roy drops a transfer bombshell, the Portdean fans run wild at Melboro, we meet Penny Race and Roy gets his chopper out… Hosted on Acast. See acast.c...

Glass Special

18 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Just what happened when Sam took a bag of glass shards home? Plus a bit of John Cosmos and some pharmacist news… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/priv...

Scholes Or Varney?

17 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Our finest Talksport moment, plus Sam goes up the storage and gets sucked into panic-buying. Tomorrow… the broken glass story… Hosted on Acast. Se...

Introducing Your Lay Scientists

15 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

How Dad’s Army can help us through the crisis, Sir John Corona, anonymous Lampards, playground virus info, and knocking up some ventilators… Hoste...

Shopping Parasite

14 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Isolation, Jackie Chan’s lock-up, some content recommendations, and a load of Joe Pasquales. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more informa...

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 2

12 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Roy waxes lyrical about the olive kebab, there’s some bungling and a rotten ref, and Roy and Blackie’s lock-in tactics are revealed…  Hoste...

The Melchester Odyssey - Part 1

12 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Our new Roy of the Rovers 1980s deep dive gets underway. Two lads go from car park shovelling to first team starts, while another pair have an on-pitc...

Bum Wasps

10 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Instagram purchasing addiction, our Corona profiteering plans, and inventive toilet roll alternatives. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more...

Your Weekend Is Yours

06 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Some old snooker music, being bionic, some Coronavirus news, more teapots, Jack Hargreaves, and new Space Robbers. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/priv...

The QPR Murders

03 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

A bit of John Cosmos, sexy telly, the Bristow story, a news jotter and more Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Nan And The Cup Final Ticket

03 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

How to act tough in a chippy, Biscoff love and Eric Bristow gets A Question of Sport wrong. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more informatio...

Manference Is Go!

28 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Plans for our conference (Coronageddon permitting), speed-mentoring, hand gel panic-buying, bridging snack woes and more… Hosted on Acast. See acast...

Long Dinner

24 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Our Radio 4 takeover plans, a trip to a Noel Coward play, hotel reviews, and Tyson Fury. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Dawson Stance

21 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Sam looks forward to a birthday party and remembers upsetting Amanda Holden. We also get some cashpoint safety tips. (Apologies for the sound issues) ...

Hateful Neighbours

18 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

A look about outdoors, bins, Sir John God’s wrath, riddles, and war animals. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Pub Car Park

17 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Sam’s first OB, Tears For Fears, some Lamparding, prosthetics, and the end of civilisation. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more informat...

Dental Nightmare

15 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Cheese, Delaney letters to West Ham, part two of Space Robbers, some more cosmos stuff, and an Apple naming crisis… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/p...

The Football Episode

14 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Tactics, predictions, and our recent brush with the upper classes - almost 100% football content. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more info...

Identical Shep

11 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Tom & Jerry, Stubby the war dog, more Blue Peter revelations and a first-hand encounter with Wojtek. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for mo...

Russian Sunday Dinner

10 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Freelancing versus the foundry, a showbiz party, a fat black cat update and a local busybody website. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more ...

Dental Hijacking

07 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Sam’s hygienist tries to entice him, we celebrate John Noakes, hear more from the cosmos and start a choose-your-own-adventure…  Hosted on Ac...

Almost Live From Leeds

04 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Backstage at our latest live show, a mailbag delve, the cosmos, some riddles, and Scotland’s best bear. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for m...

Almost Live From London

03 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Backstage at our live show, we talk about our pre-show rituals, and hear about The God Diet and self-hating Londoners. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/...

Fat Black Cat

31 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

A feline encounter goes weird, why we should all have more tea, and some football predictions... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more infor...

Guts Cod

28 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Some listener Lamparding, football haters, crabbing horror, rig servicing, non-books, and a struggle with a riddle. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/pri...

Car Sleeping

27 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Sticking with dull books, studio construction, and dubious street transactions… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Doncaster Services

24 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

A shorter than usual episode with predictions, a non-dead man, and Sam’s musings on his week Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more informa...

Bigger Than JFK

21 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Ongoing personal highs and lows, some fine riddle work and a bit of actual football chat… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more informatio...

Timbrell Update

20 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Court reporting, Keane v Carragher, influencing and more… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Rig Upgrade

17 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Cristiano Ronaldo’s life hacks, murder telly, cucumbers, and just what will Sam do on the telly for money? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy fo...

Cheers, Cosmos!

14 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Local deaths and local horses, riddles, booze hiding, a squirrel in a school, and butcher bullying.  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for m...

When The Roses Bloomed

13 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

A warning from nature, the bony hand of VAR, the Beatles launch a start-up, and Cass gets in touch with his roots…  Hosted on Acast. See acast....

Kevin Technics

10 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Sam brings back riddles, there’s some 2020 predictions, and we expose you to our Royal opinions. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more inf...

Outer Space Social Services

08 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Andy’s solo Christmas Day, the Delaneys’ Boxing Day party, sawdust lessons and will there be telly redemption for Sam? Hosted on Acast. See acast....

Celebrity New Mum-Spotting

07 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

We’re back! The viewfinder, Bruce Forsyth, the SAS, a murder, and a feminism update. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The TFTM Awards 2019

31 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Here's our look back at the best of the year - widows, naps, bargains and more... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Star Wars

23 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

We talk about the new Star Wars film and some other stuff. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Christmas Is Confusing

20 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

The decade-defining football match, a rare shout-out, a secret about Lineker’s house, and a look back at the prediction king’s 2019 efforts. Hoste...

Sam’s Teapot Family

17 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Fraternal rivalry, our countryside podcast retreat, an armed police mix-up, and some film recommendations. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for ...

Traffic Light Weirdness

16 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Sunderland duck disappointment, a restaurant fight, Christmas calypso, and a Yuletide star’s festive farewell. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privac...

Don’t Fear… Love

13 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

An election debrief, night-time toilet trips, and almost killing someone by mistake… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Lake Como Death Plunge

10 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Boris Johnson’s phone-nicking antics, a bit of mailbag and some more Krampus stuff…  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more informat...

Krampus Hate

09 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Double-visiting the services, taking the kids to ‘divorce court’, the weekend’s speedball goal and Santa’s nemesis… Hosted on Acast. See aca...

The TFTM Swimming Gala

06 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

We debate the merit of public school kids, Sam goes to a celeb birthday party and has a look at Anthea Turner’s fiancé’s hair. Also, predictions....

Britpop Cashpoint Showdown

03 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

More medical chat, a bit of a mailbag delve, a Timbrell tribute act and a bit of #AskSting… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more informat...

Health Special

02 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

We reveal our current ailments, discuss doctor punishment, explore the permasquint, and investigate alleged EPL wrongdoing… Hosted on Acast. See aca...

Raven Guts

29 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

The Archbishop of Canterbury’s rig, Simon Cowell’s toilet paper, and our search for the EPL’s most beautiful boss… Hosted on Acast. See acast....

Cockney Computer Game

26 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Why Dolly Parton is better than Ken Loach, Sting’s sex and bargains advice, a racist spider, and some more ghost stuff. Hosted on Acast. See acast.c...

Wolf Cat

25 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

The differences between relationships in Milton Keynes and Barcelona, inviting Martin Lewis for dinner, and the best ever football formation Hosted on...

Unlucky Van Man

22 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Exotic hipster football, reviews of a couple of new films, a book giveaway and some football predicting… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for ...

Dr Zimmerman’s Sweat Clinic

18 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Recorded live backstage in Cardiff, we reflect on the Prince Andrew interview and, erm, Radiohead...  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for ...

Post-Tour Exhaustion

15 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Reflections of our recent live shows, including the kind of people we don’t want to see at them. Plus more Pellegrini angst, and some thoughts about...

The Tom & Katy Show

12 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

An on-the-road mid-tour episode from Manchester, where we get mobbed by a pair of crazed fans... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more infor...

The TFTM Bubble

08 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Tentative plans to take a contract killer on tour, Rupert Murdoch’s panic over Clive Allen’s hair loss, and are you in the 3% or the 97%? Hosted o...

Give Us A War!

05 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

A mailbag delve including some post-Elton reading, dream nonsense, Pancho’s footballing skills, and a mighty TTFN…  Hosted on Acast. See acas...

A Good Woman

04 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

A broken knife update, plans for the TFTM film and video game, along with stuff about The Wall and the football… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/priv...

Soldering And A Wild Tortoise

01 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Pretty much just that - soldering and a wild tortoise. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Frittata Rig Dismantling

29 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Elton John’s many email addresses, a pre-wedding Mexican clap doctor, Sam’s family justice, and van or caravan? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/pri...

Finding John Jaws’ Kidneys

28 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Shark tips from Sam’s mum, a look back at The Wall, how to do non-sports on radio, and some other stuff… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy fo...

The Episode Is Operational

25 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

We delve into the ghost book again, predict a bit of football, and learn more about Michael Hutchence… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for mo...

Delaney Was Right All Along

22 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Sam gets some stuff off his chest, plus emails about intimate injuries, an embarrassing reminder and secret teacher games.  Hosted on Acast. See ...

‘Give Us Some Readies You Mug!’

21 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

A look back at the weekend’s football… but to be honest, it’s mostly about Danny Dyer’s BBC1 gameshow ‘The Wall’. Hosted on Acast. See aca...

Johnny 4

18 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Powerday, frozen raspberries, Canning Town, superglue protests, the hardest Beatle, unsuitable films for kids, overbuying pasta, and a little bit of f...

Dumpsite?

15 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

The best use of a Lego hand, a local hardman goes too far, neighbour nicknames, a dog-procuring liar, and the half-term school bunny… Hosted on Acas...

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