Top Flight Time Machine

‘It’s The Ball Talking!’

15 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Sir John Asda, Sam’s weak spot revealed to Millwall, Desert Island Discs rated, and some more ghost stuff… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy ...

No To Space Pies

14 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

We discuss baths, moan about our newsletter, dismiss Heston Blumenthal, and argue about Michael Hutchence. (Sign up for our newsletter at https://tfti...

Many Ghosts

11 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Unplanned weekends, spying on Lineker, Coleen v Rebekah, our newsletter, and we delve into the ultimate ghost book. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/pri...

The Pompeii Stroker

08 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Sam’s second fact, some poetry, some dodgy grass fire activity, some school banter and some other stuff. Includes sexual content.  Hosted on Ac...

We Love Facts Now

07 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Curious Nelson Piquet, smashing killer fungi, Janet Jackson, and more. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Winter Attack

04 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

How to modify and maximise your bed rig set-up, plus a dad/cat/dog/snake story, Sardinian chaos, and a bit of football chat. Hosted on Acast. See acas...

Lineker Toilet Encounter

01 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Another mailbag delve episode - not much else to add really. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Machines We Want To Buy

30 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Sam saves a pizzeria, leprechauns, Frank Lampard’s fair play response, and 136,000 eggs. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information...

Eazy-E’s Admin Day

27 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

We reveal our Wu names, admonish certain UK cities, look back AND forward to nuclear armageddon, and predict a few football matches. Hosted on Acast. ...

Flaming Maori

24 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Labour #onthecoins, Baby ResultsBot, a burning man, the best tweet ever, and a dramatic way to settle a debt among friends. Hosted on Acast. See acast...

Bobby Moore Action Man

23 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Sam gets all excited after a West Ham win, we hail Sky Sports’ football punditry, and experience differing curry fortunes. Hosted on Acast. See acas...

The Trudeau/Disney Axis Of Evil

20 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Our plans for the Queen’s death, how to entertain the ponciest authors in Britain, and a bit of football stuff. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/priva...

How To Get Away With Murder

17 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Shelley, Marc Bolan, Gary Lineker, Dale Winton, a roof dad and more from Yanni’s bar… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Gaming Saturday Kitchen

16 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

David Cameron’s return to public life, James Martin’s fireman meltdown, and more from Yanni’s bar ‘Memories’ on the island of Kos… Hosted ...

Fish O'Clock

13 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Some cabbie acting, predictions, a film quiz, napping, a demon-resetting chat with the otters and a frog wedding. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/priva...

Hello Again From London

10 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

The final of our cosy backstage chats from our live tour in which we talk about alcoholism and a top gangster’s bodily fluids…  Hosted on Aca...

Hello From London

09 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Another backstage episode, with more tales from our hugely successful live tour... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello From Glasgow

08 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

A mini-episode we recorded before our Glasgow show this evening - let us regale you with tales of life on the road. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/pri...

Stamp Stamp!

03 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Activities, balcony sleeping, a middle-aged stand-off, post office dreams, and some football chat… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more i...

‘Bonjour… Ca Va?'

30 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

More tales from the Delaneys’ all-inclusive compound, including all-day drinking with Cas and Sam losing the plot with a French Liverpool fan. Hoste...

Thousand Mile Cat Eye

29 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Reports from France and Cyprus, including an unwelcome visitor to the pool, some supermarket molestation and some cat chat… Hosted on Acast. See aca...

2008-2009

27 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Phil Brown scolds his players on the pitch, Man City get super rich, we have a naked night in with Jurgen Klopp, there’s insanity at the Toon, and F...

Earth Tournament Inquest

26 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

A look back at the England v Morocco final, ResultsBot’s downward slide goes on, widows, Alim Ozturk’s Turkish life, and war in the Delaney family...

RIP Davy Tiggywinkle

23 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Andy reports some tragic news from Cyprus, the prediction mind games increase, and we hear possibly the ultimate TTFN story… Hosted on Acast. See ac...

It’s All About The Toppings

20 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

A report from our secret compound, a gift for an atrocious criminal, a hot dog challenge, some ratings and some Aquafresh facts… Hosted on Acast. Se...

Brighton Coining

19 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

The ‘so what’ penalty, intense German predicting camps, and an encounter with the Coin Mistress during a seaside jaunt…  Hosted on Acast. S...

Bates, Sudoku and the Merry Widow

16 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

We finally reveal the identity of Britain’s Best Widow while Sam recounts the late 90’s pursuit of a legendary DJ… Hosted on Acast. See acast.co...

Delaney v Brandreth

13 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

A mailbag delve with some Senor Dis ‘N’ Dat, a lion liar and a local vigilante. Plus a Timbrell update and Joey Barton’s dad. Hosted on Acast. S...

Rate Your Fingers

12 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Why Gary Lineker equals safety, the new wave of banter, some ratings, a Leniverse update, and we reveal Britain’s Best Widow... Hosted on Acast. See...

Premier League Preview

09 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

A look ahead at the new season, and also some stuff about Grange Hill deaths and the estate of Sir John Triffid. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privac...

Podcast For The Hooch Generation

06 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

A mailbag delve, a trip to the Costa Brava with Rocky and Ricky, the introduction of our new game ‘Ratings’, and the spectacular departure of Scra...

Toxic Masculinity Buns

05 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Len’s alter-egos, fast cars, diffusing football violence, a Budapest rig, and Paul Hollywood… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more info...

Chocolating?

02 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Bits of all sorts - coins, rigs, dis, dat, Capes, badgers, work disciplinary, and a thieving stray man. Join our prediction league on the Soccer Satur...

The Shanklin Report

30 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Sam brings us tales of coining and car booting on the Isle of Wight, and we discuss Geoff Capes' budgie-breeding motivations... Hosted on Acast. See a...

Geoff Capes Goes To Davos

23 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

The strongest man of all time addresses members of the World Economic Forum. Plus widows’ rigs, crematorium bike lessons and gang rejection. Hosted ...

Pards For Monaco

22 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Alan Pardew, celebrity coins, Steve Bruce and a bit of Sid James. Oh, and an exclusive interview with Sam’s son Len. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/...

Ken S. Elliot

19 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

We discuss the new Cats and Top Gun film trailers.  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Badger Stand-Off

16 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

A mailbag delve with some fresh Senor Dis ‘n Dat, a toothpaste deep dive, a bit of ‘touchy touchy’ and our plans for the Potato Awards. Hosted o...

The Badger/Stoat/Hawk/Rabbit Axis

15 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Incredible sport, the refuelling habits of druids, England’s Earth Tournament final opponents are revealed, and there’s a magnificent Lewis Collin...

Franky Stu vs Suus Kiis

12 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

John Pigface rings Broadmoor, we learn more about Big Galaxy’s hit TV show ‘Warrior’, there’s some John Timbrell info, and even some football ...

Human Barbecue

09 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

A mailbag delve including some Dis ‘n’ Dat tales, the nature of hotels and the notion of trust, holiday pets, summer fairs, and lots more… Hoste...

Blame The Alphabet

07 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Updates from England’s semi-final group activities in Earth Tournament and lots of revelations about camp life. Plus… shredding and fire. Hosted o...

Lord Sebastian’s Hotel

05 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Updates from Earth Tournament, Lampard arrives at Chelsea, and why football transfer news stinks. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more info...

School Fairs And Narrowboats

02 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Find out what we’ve been up to at schools this weekend, what’s happening to the elephants’ tusks, and why we hate Holland & Barrett… ...

Kylie's Eggs

01 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Sam's Kylie anecdote was too long to fit into the Monday episode so here it is on its own... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more informati...

Big Galaxy v Glastonbury

01 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

An episode dominated by England v Argentina at Earth Tournament and Kylie at Glastonbury. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Massive Chip Spoon

28 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

An update from Earth Tournament as well as the bird and squirrel scene. Also, we discuss which is more toxic - Archie Buchanan or Instagram? Hosted on...

Bumcrease

25 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Fresh mailbag action – some Dis ‘n’ Dat, some lies, and plans for a van… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Tramp Hand

23 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

An Earth Tournament update and some incredible off-the-pitch revelations, a swimming lesson story, and a citizen’s arrest… Hosted on Acast. See ac...

Xos Vin

21 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

An Earth Tournament bombshell, some Leniverse team line-ups, and more Senor Dis ‘n’ Dat sightings… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for mo...

The Italian Urn

18 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

A range of Senor Dis N’ Dat stories from the mailbag, as well as a fight with a homeless man. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more inform...

Drug-Taking Idiot

17 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

How to gain infamy on the Sky News sofa, a mini-dive into Sam’s Father’s Day gift, and a bus-driving courtroom liar… Hosted on Acast. See acast....

Earth Tournament 2019 Update

16 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

A bonus episode, rounding up all of the Earth Tournament 2019 group stage action and the full draw for the second round. PLUS... an exclusive major tr...

Nick Knowles’ Self Surgery

14 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

An Earth Tournament update ahead of this weekend’s final group matches, Andy’s logistical solutions, and a double whammy of self-defending men. Al...

Davey The Canoe

11 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Some TV tips, a Cannon Dad offshoot story, Senor Dis & Dat vs a wall, and the internet spies on Sam mid-episode… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/...

Batman's Neck

10 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

An update from the Earth Tournament, the Caped Crusader gives up reversing, and news about our next deep dive… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privac...

More Imaginary Football Worlds

07 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Some of the deluge of feedback we’ve had from listeners after our groundbreaking previous episode… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more...

Imaginary Football Worlds

05 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

This is a long conversation from a Keegan Odyssey recording - but as it’s got nothing at all to do with KK, we’re putting it out as a separate ext...

Sports Bag Kebabs

04 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

A John Timbrell update, more on Sam v Noel, and loads of chip shop and other fast food horror stories. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more...

Chip Shop Anxiety

03 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

On the coins, ghosts, and a whole host of chip-related stories… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Coin King

31 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Plans for our first West End musical are hatched, Sam reports from the Isle of Wight and we consider a home coin drop experience… Hosted on Acast. S...

The Hermit

28 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

The ‘triggerproof' card, Sam’s experience of working with Jerry Springer, a school ice cream turf war, and a report from a National Trust compound...

Tell Me It!

24 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Weekend World, cream cakes and Sam as the new Tory Prime Minister… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Incredible Hulk v Tony Macaroni

21 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

A beautiful IFS moment, the world’s best school, Brian Walden’s lying history, and the Hulk does kids parties… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/pr...

Creme Eggs And Gravestones

20 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

We plan to sponsor a football team AND launch our Cold War festival. Plus, kicking a footballer when he’s down, and calculating populations using th...

Man Man

17 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Cosmic ordering, Paul Rudd, filthy stupid dolphins and Andy’s toxic relationship with Sam Allardyce. Shoot for the moon, everyone… Hosted on Acast...

The Christmas Singing Lesson

14 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

We plan a Yuletide concert, hear about George Michael’s emergency landing, swap a cheese plant in Norwich and use a Liverpool poster for ID… ...

Meet The Controller

12 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

As the Premier League season ends, we make summer plans to visit nuclear bunkers and the National Archive. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for ...

Massive Ice Cream Bowl

11 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Another mailbag delve, with rogue pubes, a shed-building addict, an oddball and some crack. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more informatio...

How Tall Are You?

10 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

We talk about actual football, look forward to Bielsa v Lampard 2, and meet history’s original stray man… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy f...

Pulp The Badges!

07 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

We launch the TFTM VIP Experience Day, remember shooting guns, and hear about a bad digger… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more informat...

East End Grass

03 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

An interview with a groundsman goes wrong, a summer hole is dug, and we meet Sir John YouTube…  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more...

Mant

30 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Google Baby, a non-kidnapping kidnapper, the truth about blobs, Sam’s Viagra journalism and more from the mailbag… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/...

The GIF Wizard

29 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

How the 1980 Iranian embassy siege was ended by extreme predicting, Bielsa v Terry, and Manference 2022 is launched. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/pr...

‘My Eyes Don’t Lie To Me’

26 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Reaction to Keane v Neville, the PFA PL team assessed, and some dubious parenting admissions… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more inform...

Monkey’s Blood

23 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Another delve into the mailbag including a rejected tattoo, an update from the king of Chinatown, an attack from a stray woman, and NHS Dave… Hosted...

FIPA Revealed

22 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

A plan to visit the Isle of Wight and invade Sealand, Gary Neville simmers to the point of boiling and the truth about the Windows 95 bin… Hosted on...

Sam’s Birthday Pan

19 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Teenage boozing, playground memories, speed-predicting, a boxing confession and a last-gasp dog death escape…  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/p...

Quick Quick, Come Quick!

16 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

A clown on a roof, looking around in a pub in the olden days, William Shatner humps a mountain, a confession about The Bill, and Sam vs golf… Hosted...

Can Wasps Bite?

15 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

And can ghosts upload videos of racism on to social media? Also, more Timbrell court action, Sam vs Geoff Shreeves and a rant about facts… Hosted on...

Pivoting to Terrorism

12 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Sam gets offered a job on the official Isis magazine, the tyre man comes round, and we herald the return of self-defending courtroom king John Timbrel...

Hand Cream?

09 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

A farm offer, a stray man’s robot encounter, Strike It Lucky on Ecstasy, and a homemade cannon…  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for m...

Downstairs Grooming

08 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Predicting, vasectomies, abominable male behaviour and the dark truth about morris dancers… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more informat...

Dirty Garden Crab Boy

06 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Another round-up from the TFTM mailbag, including a Disney ambulance, hole exploration, the Brazilan animal lottery and Roy Keane in a maze… Hosted ...

Dingo Stick

05 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Dog ham, parenting hell, smell blindness, and Sam comes out as a homosexual as the build-up to his birthday week begins… Hosted on Acast. See acast....

Vangelis and My Little Pony

02 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Fridge magnets, ghost stewards, the benefits of war, and a magnificent stray woman tale… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information...

A Cheeky Hamlet

29 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Illicit underage booze buying, a winding revival, ball injuries, a stray beach man and that… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more informa...

90s Bullying

26 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Fond recollections of a mugging, a short-lived stray man and why you shouldn’t interfere with Sunderland nature… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/pr...

Andorra With The Pig Men

25 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Some looking back AND ahead, assorted dog-related stuff, and an ill-fated press trip up a mountain… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more ...

Sam and the Receptionist

23 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

An emergency episode as Sam had some stuff he needed to share - a receptionist run-in, a school dog story and a superb sex fail/stray man saga... Host...

Fertile Or Infertile?

22 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Sam’s summer camp fighting memories, the launch of our podcast training course, Patrice Evra’s spunky outburst, and… space herpes? Hosted on Aca...

Raspberry Ripple Moustache

19 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

The royal penalty shoot-out decider, Wacky Races, magnets, Newton’s Blouson, ghostly hit and run and more Archie Buchanan tales… Hosted on Acast. ...

Staring At The Ocean

18 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Service station ruminations, karaoke etiquette, Harris or Gallen, and saying yes to stuff you’re too embarrassed to say no to… Hosted on Acast. Se...

Lion or Seagull?

15 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

We learn more about our random fixture generator, ResultsBot has a filings-fuelled tantrum, we hear about a road race with a German legend and why Bil...

Christopher Timothy v George Lucas

12 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

A clash of two showbiz heavyweights (and their wingmen), as well as some ingenious shoplifting and relief for the Old Trafford WAGs… Hosted on Acast...

The Perils Of Concentrating

11 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

A four-decade lie, driving alone for relaxation, the tranquiliser day experience, NASA cheese, and why you can’t burn a ghost… Hosted on Acast. Se...

Funeral Victims?

08 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Not an apocalypse special, but lots of haunting advice, some stuff about wake buffets, a stray interloper, and the weekend’s football predictions…...

Stray Birthday

05 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

A mailbag delve, including a 32-year-old stray man pretending to be a schoolboy, a confession of a theft from God and a hugely traumatic sex fail… H...

Scouse Wind

04 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Jason Cundy on period dramas, Sir John Meals, Sam’s brief steroid addiction, pre-Brexit Asda dystopia, and we urge John Inverdale to speak out again...

Bonds... Or Hurlock?

01 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Sam’s prediction downfall veers into view, we foresee a West Ham stand-unveiling ambush, plus some mailbag delving… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com...