Chapter 1: What health issues does the host discuss at the beginning?
How you doing over there?
Doing good.
Okay. Okay, okay. Here we go. Wow. Was last week not fun? Hi, guys. Welcome back to another episode of Two Hot Takes. I'm your host, Morgan.
I'm Justin.
And last week, episode was a wee bit late because I ended up in the hospital. I ended up getting admitted to the hospital for colitis slash systemic inflammatory response syndrome. They're unclear, but... The good news is I now have my colonoscopy under my belt and I am one less five millimeter polyp. They removed a five millimeter polyp. Yeah.
And we're that much closer to sorting my stomach issues and figuring out what is going on there. But wow, I've just been so under the weather and like still not feeling right and I'm They put me on two antibiotics. I've got like Cipro and Flagyl and I'm having a weird reaction to these antibiotics.
And if you've ever experienced this, please let me know because I called the doctor today and was like telling him what I was experiencing. And I then called my sister-in-law and told her what I was experiencing because she's a PA. And both of them were like, I've never really heard of that reaction from those antibiotics. Like both. The doctor was like, yeah, I don't know.
You should still keep taking them though. And essentially the reaction is like, I take these antibiotics and they're making me feel high. Like I've had multiple different gummies and I feel so high and like massive amounts of anxiety to the point where I was like, I obviously haven't taken anything because I'm sick. And I'm like, what if there's a gas leak?
We slept with our window open because I was having so much anxiety from this feeling. So if you ever experienced that or if you're a pharmacist and you're like, hey, because my doctor doesn't know and it's just crazy.
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Chapter 2: How do the hosts reflect on the importance of health?
Is there a creative solution to this? I am not open to the idea of separate bedrooms or two beds in the same room. I just bought a brand new mattress last year, lol. I thought about possibly the Scandinavian sleep method, but I'm unsure how that would work with fitted flat sheets. I see how it would work for duvets. Has anyone else experienced this before? What else could be done?
Part of growth with OCD is learning to tolerate behaviors that go directly against your instinct with the disorder. And I've grown in a lot of areas, but this is one I'm struggling to grow from. I feel like there are certain opinions and preferences I'm allowed to maintain, and if I could only pick and choose a handful of them, this would be one of them. I do genuinely want to compromise though.
Thank you again.
And that's the most important thing here. I mean, there's a lot to get into, but if you're willing to compromise and you have someone that isn't, again, it's like, let's work together, people. I get not wanting to change your routine. My routine's been the same since I was in elementary school, middle school. I've always been a night shower. I love a morning shower. I don't usually take one, but
Man, is it nice to wake up and walk in hot water. It wakes you up. It's like I can't think of anything better right away in the morning. But yet again, I'm still a night shower.
But I don't understand why it's so difficult for him to do that like baby rinse. Like just do the little rinse, rinse. You can do it before or after your girlfriend showers. Like you're not going to waste that much water. Just hop in, body wash, hop out. You don't have to wash your hair unless that's like a part of what she expects.
But like a little body rinse like he was doing when he was staying over, that's a fair compromise. And then you still get your morning routine.
Yeah, you just have to have each person see that they're compromising. Like he would have to recognize she's compromising in certain ways that he is too. It's not that he's indebted with this extra, I gotta get in and do this chore because when you shower, when you don't want to, it feels like a chore.
Whereas a lot of times showering feels like this break from the day, you get clean and it's really enjoyable. If he sees it as a chore, he needs to see that you're also making compromises too, like you're even, you're working together to do this. Because I have the same feeling as her. I don't love going through the whole day and getting in bed
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Chapter 3: What relationship dilemma is introduced regarding showering habits?
Yeah.
And they tried it somewhere and they were like, it was so good, but we don't do it at home yet. And I was like, you will someday.
And ditch the top sheet because that just makes it a whole mess. There's no reason for it.
Wash your duvet covers. You need to get a duvet with a cover you can take apart and wash. Yes, yes. Yeah.
Right.
But then if you don't have that, then you do need a top sheet.
Of course. Of course. But it is so much easier and simpler without the top sheet. I was religiously a top sheet person my entire life. And when I first met you, it was really a weird transition for me because they didn't have that extra layer to pull up. But now when we go to hotels and things and there's top sheets, it's just in the way. It's unnecessary for us.
I know. I do like it at a hotel, though. That's like the place I love it. I guess, yeah. At a hotel.
Yeah, because it feels clean.
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Chapter 4: How do the hosts suggest resolving the couple's showering conflict?
Like there's got to be a trade off.
Yes.
And I'm like, what's not clicking? And I think this is honestly a pretty big red flag for things going forward. What happens if you get a pet and she doesn't want to scoop poop, clean up anything, take care of the pet? What happens if you have a kid? She doesn't want to change diapers. That's gross. I mean, there's other areas where you could kind of equate that to like
I would also say, hey, guess what? I'm not taking all the kitchen stuff anymore. It's back to 50-50, girl. You're not picking up in other areas. No one likes chores. That's what being an adult is, though. You can come help in the kitchen now. Cook a couple of meals. Get in there. Get in there, little doggy.
Yeah.
Let's go.
Well, I think if one person predominantly is the cook or is predominantly the laundry doer, That doesn't mean you should let laundry pile up forever because they do 100% of it. I think the other person should always take on a little bit. If she had to cook one night because of the circumstances that day, that should not be an issue. You always should be able to do everything while specializing.
But it's like, you can't just be, I will never set foot in the kitchen ever, no matter what, even if you're dying in the hospital. I'm still gonna wait for you to cook my meal.
It's weird.
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Chapter 5: What challenges does OP face with their partner's addiction?
I also got diagnosed late in life and meds have been good for me. OP responds, I didn't want to get into this because of how much he's being piled on already. And fair enough, he was being an ass about this, but he's got some serious problems with addiction. Non-stimulant meds don't do anything for him and he can't be on the stimulants without abusing them.
Meds made a huge difference when he was able to be on them. So he kept trying to find a way to regulate it, but it went off the rails every time. That makes sense.
Yeah, it's tough.
It cost OP $300 just to replace the teapot.
Chapter 6: How does the cost of replacing the tea set affect the relationship?
We aren't the kind of people who buy stuff like this. Yeah. OP does share what the pattern is. It is the Royal Albert Laurentian Snowdrop Pattern. It is absolutely beautiful.
And to just get a teacup and saucer is $30, which is like, I mean, if you think about costs, like we buy all of our drinking glasses from like TJ Maxx, HomeGoods, like you can get a box of like eight drinking glasses, 30 bucks, same price.
And they're indestructible.
But this is what it looks like. It's like got a beautiful green tinned gold foil around all the edges.
Yeah. You know, see, I. It's beautiful. I think you find one off pieces like that. That are the same set that match, replace some of the cups up there, wherever these are stored. And then at least, I mean, you're still breaking technically the same thing, but it's not the one that's from grandma.
I know. Well, there is a set available right now on Etsy for $429.
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Chapter 7: What are the implications of hiding sentimental items in a relationship?
And I know OP said we're not the type of people to buy this stuff, $300 for the teapot. But considering you've got the cups, $30, $60, $90, $120, $150, a $300 tea thing, $450, a big serving platter, this person's pretty fairly priced, slight discount.
Do you think that's bad, though? Is it bad to replace things and not say? And then when all of the stuff seems to be broken, you're like, hey, just kidding.
It's not grandma's anymore.
Grandma's set is tucked away safe. Then someone's like, then you got a whole other problem on your hands.
I know.
This is kind of a lose-lose.
It is interesting.
Because you can't be deceptive and lie. That'll never get you anywhere good. It might save grandma's set, but if it tanks your trust in the relationship, then I'd rather lose grandma's set than lose the trust.
There is a comment here from someone else. Frankly, I don't get the recommendations to pack it away and hide it. Stick it in a box never to be used. Then what? Pass the box along to another relative in the future? Kind of defeats the purpose of keeping the connection. What about a small display cabinet for part of it?
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Chapter 8: How do past relationships influence current marriage dynamics?
then box the rest for use on special occasions. If at that point he's yanking a cup out of the display case for use, of course it's intentional. But this really may be the value of this stuff for him is to actually use it.
I can see him perhaps feeling more of a connection to using her china rather than simply having it collecting dust in a closed cabinet somewhere, so maybe a display bridges that gap with the rest in an actual sealed box. I think just display it all. Don't touch. And then maybe buy him a saucer. Say, hey, this is your saucer that I bought. It's not grandma's. You can use it. Or you buy the saucer.
You don't tell him and say, this is the one cup you get. And after you break this cup, there is no more use of the Laurentian snowdrop pale green saucer. No more once you break this one.
No more.
OP does respond. I like this, thank you. I also hate the idea of it being boxed away. We both feel connected to her when we use it, and I don't want that to be gone. I just want the use to be intentional and careful, and if he's using it every day, he's just dot dot dot dot dot not capable of maintaining that level of care. Stuff he uses every day gets broken very quickly.
So I think that's a great, great solution. I'm curious how they're displaying them now if they're not in a display cabinet.
I think they're just up with the rest.
It makes sense why he's just accessing them and can't keep his Grammy paws off them. They're right in front of him. Yeah. There are some beautiful secondhand vintage restored Hutch's. Like if you search Hutch on Facebook Marketplace right now,
They're coming back.
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