Bonus Episodes on patreon: https://patreon.com/veryreallygood RETURNING AFTER WHAT FEELS LIKE YEARS!!! This week we talk about Tour Labrant update Elon Zuckerberg Follow Me: https://instagram.com/kurtisconner/ https://twitter.com/kurtisconner https://youtube.com/user/kurtisconner Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Chapter 1: Why is Kurtis excited to be back?
Hello, everybody. We are so back, dude. We're so back. It's insane. Everyone said we'd never be back, and I'm back, dude. Look where I'm at, dude. Made it home, safe and sound, in one piece. Like the anime, dude. I made it back like the anime. I made it back in one piece. I don't know why I sounded like Donald Trump there for a second.
Like the anime. Made it back in one piece. Just like the anime.
Yeah, dude. We made it back. Australia, dude. I just finished a big tour in Australia and New Zealand. Hey, man. It's good to be home. Shows were fucking sick. They were a lot of fun. Everybody in the crowds was... Everybody was sick, man. It was awesome. Some of the best crowds you ever had. Especially that last dude. Perth was so sick. Sydney was awesome. Melbourne...
Chapter 2: What was the experience like on the Australia tour?
um melbourne was crazy because we the palais theater um that was the one we did in 2023 did one show there it was awesome um i don't even think that one sold out but it was like pretty packed and it was like it was one of the biggest venues i've ever done and then we came back two years later fucking first one sold out and then the second one almost sold out but So it felt really cool, man.
I just felt so much love in Australia, man. It was just so much love from the fans, from the crowds, dude. And it was just sick, man. A ton of the shows were sold out. It was great, man. And it's all done now. Europe and UK is up next. Those are all pretty much sold out also. And... Yeah, dude. Stoked. Got a couple of weeks back home.
Um, couple of weeks back home and then, uh, yeah, head out, head out back on the road. And then I got a little bit of time off and then, uh, yeah, we got some more shows coming. So stay tuned. We got more shows to announce, um, you know, to, to close out the, uh, the good fellow world tour. So, uh, it's been incredible so far, man. And, uh, yeah. Yeah.
Hopefully we can film the show somewhere, release it somewhere as a special. It's been a good time, man. Fuck, and dude, hey, guess if my sleep schedule has been fucked ever since I got back from Australia.
Chapter 3: How did Kurtis feel about his sleep schedule after the tour?
Oh, guess. Guess if it has been just terrible. Guess it has been just so bad.
Um, the first week I was back, dude, fucked. I felt like shit, dude. I was not getting any restful sleep every day. I'd be having like two, three hour naps, waking up like disoriented and been like, fucking, where am I? Go to bed, wake up 4am on the dot. Just for like a week, man. I'm finally like slowly getting back to normal.
And it's nice because I'm going to get my sleep schedules going to get fucked. Because I'm going to be in Europe's fucking five, what is it, five hours ahead? I mean, that's a lot better. At one point, I was like fucking, I was like 14 hours or 16 hours difference from Toronto. It's like fucking, it was brutal, man. What's up with these time differences, man? Just make it the same time everywhere.
Make it the same. You know what I mean? Earth is flat. We don't need any of this bullshit, these time zones. I'm zoning out. Just hearing about it, man. Just saying it out loud.
I'm zoning out on these time zones.
I got some new sound effects, too. It's the full one, but I like cutting it off. That is like my new favorite sound effect, dude. But only like the cutoff version, you know, the abrupt one, you know? This one's tough to time, though. And then I got that one. So we got some good ones, man. What's this one? Right. Dude, I missed this thing. Oh, hell, I've missed you.
Dude, this feels like... It's like... This is how it feels like when, you know, in God of War... 2018... when he goes back to get his, the daggers that he's like, he's, he's put away, he's hid away that part of himself. He's like, I'm no longer spoiler alert. And he's like, I'm no longer that man. I'm no longer the God of war. I don't need these anymore. But, but then, you know,
Duty calls, and he does need them, so he goes back, and he's like, you know. I mean, it's not really the same because I never hid this away. I never buried this anywhere due to shame, you know. But it's definitely giving that, you know.
It's definitely giving that.
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Chapter 4: What are Kurtis's thoughts on Elon Musk's recent behavior?
I am become meme. Yeah, pretty much. I'm just living the meme. It's like there's living the dream and there's living the meme. And it's pretty much what's happening, you know?
Dude, I want to fucking... I want to start... I want to... You know those little fucking things of skin you get on your thumb, on your fingernails? I want to grab one. I want to start there. And I want to peel all my skin off after watching that, dude. I want to peel my skin off like a fucking banana. Because... I might puke, man. I am become meme. Yeah. Dude, the interviewer's little fake laugh.
Dude. What is the full context of that even? Dude, it's so cringe.
That was something. I am become meme. Yeah, pretty much. I'm just living the meme. It's like there's living the dream and there's living the meme. And it's pretty much what's happening.
This was at the conservative political action conference. What are you doing there, man? Why is he like... What? Why is he like a government official? How the fuck did that happen, dude? I feel like that's not allowed. You can't just do that because you have a lot of money. Dude, he's so cringe, bro. I'm becoming... So, dude, wearing a stupid big fucking chain. Like, what is that chain even?
Is it a chain?
Oh, my God, dude. I... I'm getting... I'm getting nauseous, dude. Speaking of weird fucking billionaires, dude, this other thing I want to talk about... I want to talk about Mark Zuckerberg next, but I do... I am very scared for you guys in America. One, because obviously Donald Trump is the president, again, fucking somehow. Two, you have this fucking dork, Elon Musk, with...
I'm sorry, but negative aura. I know I'm 30 and I felt gross saying that, but there's no other way of saying it. He has... It's like... It doesn't even seem human. It's like he's... He is like evil manifest. He just... And he just sort of like is just there. And just because he has a lot of money and it's... It's a very scary...
um it's a very scary time and i really hope that we don't become the 51st state because i will i will actually i will become mean Okay, so I'm going to talk about Mark Zuckerberg. Mark Zuckerberg, founder of Facebook. And now he... Well, now he's meta. I guess he met a girl a while ago. And now they're married, right? Or some shit. So... For, I think it was for his birthday?
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Chapter 5: What cringe moment did Kurtis highlight about Elon Musk?
Mark Zuckerberg in any situation. How can I make this more about me?
Yeah. I can't escape these fucking Australians, man.
Also, why was Mark Zuckerberg's fucking booty jiggling like crazy in that? Okay.
Hold up. Yeah, did you guys see that? Freaking dude, why is Mark Zuckerberg got that fucking cake, dude? Damn.
How do you do fucking... Let's do playback speed. Slow down. Enhance. Guys, if you're just listening to this, I'm so sorry. But I... You gotta see this fucking butt move. Yeah, dude. Mark... What's up? Dude. He's got a friggin... Mark Zuckerberg's got a dumper on him, dude. Who would have thought? Benson, you're out. Alright? Mark, you're in. Just learned how to do a backflip, dude.
He probably couldn't do it. He probably couldn't do a backflip. He's too bottom heavy. That's probably why. His ass was too fat. Where was that in the social network, huh? So Jesse Eisenberg, how did you prepare for this role of Mark Zuckerberg? Well, it was a lot of squats. I do a lot of squats, man.
Never in my life did I think I would ever see Mark Zuckerberg in a skin-tight fucking sequined blue jumpsuit singing. It's not even Facebook blue, dude. It's like a light blue. I'm disliking this. All right. I'm not fucking... I'm not poking that, okay? Yeah, weird. Also, of all people to imitate, you're going to do Benson Boone? You know what? Fuck Benson Boone. Okay?
That guy stole my whole flow, dude. Fuck that guy. He didn't really do anything to me. You know? I don't care for his music, but I'm sure people like it, right? He's athletic. He can do flips. He can sing. That's great. Come on, man. I mean, I stole my flow from people, I'm sure. I'm from Australians, pretty much. But, you know, still. Come on, Benson.
And if you're watching this right now, you got to fucking sue Mark Zuckerberg, okay? He's showing you up. He is showing your ass up, okay? I'm trying to think what else we can talk about for this next little bit, dude. Something a little fun, something a little sillier. How about that? Let's switch it up. Let's get a little more silly.
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Chapter 6: Why does Kurtis express concern about Mark Zuckerberg?
I'll drag the slider to fit the puzzle. Oh, that's so fun. Thank you, TikTok. I'm not a robot.
Okay.
I mean, I don't know if this sound is copyright, but... Dude, this was such a rough watch.
Me when I find a Casio on the ground.
Because it's a rough watch. I saw this... I watched the last episode of the new season of Love is Blind. Okay? I guess Jenna was watching some of it. And, I mean... Even she was like, I couldn't fucking do it. Like... And it's hard to watch, man.
But, you know, we wanted to see... And I was, like, watching here and there, and it's like, okay, we wanted to know who's going to get married, you know, who's not going to get married, like, what's going to happen, right? Speaking of finding out what's going to happen... Sorry, one second. I'm going to find out if I won. Please play again. Good. Good, good, good, good, good. I lost.
I lost on my fucking roll up the rim to win. But... Dude, so I'm just watching these weddings. Most of the time, it's just normal, right? The one person said no because she was like, I don't know how you – I asked you your opinions about politics, and you've been really wishy-washy, and you go to a church that doesn't accept – a homosexuality.
So I'm going to, uh, and you don't really, you know, I, I asked you about like, uh, black lives matter and stuff. And you just like, didn't really have any opinion on it, which is crazy. So I'm, I don't think we're right. Um, which is valid, right?
I feel like with politics, you kind of, there's always this thing where, um, where it's like, well, we used to be able to like look past people's opinions and stuff used to be able to just have, you can have your opinion. I can have mine, you know, but it's like,
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Chapter 7: What did Mark Zuckerberg do for his wife's birthday?
It's like that's not what's going on at all. But this next one, dude, the next wedding, my jaw... Dude, my jaw dropped. I mean, there's no way of putting it. My jaw was on the floor, okay? My jaw was on the floor, fully agape, My mouth was just open. It was like my dog walked in there and like fell asleep in my mouth. Like it was open. It was like fully on the ground.
A huge... Because... I'm just going to play this video. And if you're just listening to this, I'll explain it after. Dude.
This guy...
In a baby blue Benson Boone-ass fucking tuxedo.
Ew!
Dude.
And he longboards down the aisle.
Dude, never in my life have I seen... an embarrassing... an embarrassing act, okay? I've never... It's one thing to... Like, if that was a regular skateboard, I'd be like, still, that's fucked, that's weird. The fact that it was a longboard... That makes it like a million times worse. You can't even do tricks on that, dude.
If he, dude, if he came down the aisle with a skateboard, you know, did a fucking, a clean ass fucking tray flip, you know, was maybe did like a, I'll back 180 crook on one of like the chairs or something. Switch frontside 360 up onto the fucking podium. And then like snap his board in half. I'd be like, okay, that's actually fucking sick. Like that'd be cool, right? A longboard?
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