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Watch What Crappens

#3412 Below Deck Med S11E02 Part One: Baby On Board

16 Jun 2026

Transcription

Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.

Chapter 1: What are the main conflicts among the crew in Below Deck Med?

0.031 - 20.031 Ronnie Karam

Watch what happens when there's so much that happens

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21.648 - 45.008 Ben Mandelker

Hello, and welcome to Watcher Crappin's, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker, and joining me today is the one and only Ronnie Karam. Hi, Ronnie. How's it going? Well, hello. How are you? I am fabulous. It's Tuesday. That's a big, big night of TV tonight. The Summer House Aftermath thing is going to air. We are so excited to talk about it.

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45.369 - 70.771 Ben Mandelker

That'll be tomorrow, of course, though, even though some of us may have already seen it. And we will just keep our mouths shut until then. But today is Below Deck Med. Very exciting show. Join us on Patreon, patreon.com slash watch or crappens for bonus episodes, ad-free listening, free newsletter, video, crappens on demand. You can watch us, not just listen. The Foolish McGaggy, okay? Discord.

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70.851 - 93.843 Ben Mandelker

It's great. It's a whole community. It's a whole life. It's a whole full crappens experience over there. So come join us for that. And I just want to say also, and some of you know, I have a... I have a little sub stack on the side where I talk about food. And I wrote a very lengthy cookbook review over the weekend for a cookbook called Better at Home by Clue Henry. And it's such a good cookbook.

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94.304 - 100.13 Ben Mandelker

So I encourage you all to go check it out and read my review, mainly because I put a lot of time into it on this one. So that's NBD.

100.15 - 113.425 Michael Rosenbaum

Yeah, those are great. My aunties all are huge fans. Thank you. They're like, when's Ben's new newsletter coming out? I'm like, shut up. You're like, I just want every single week. You've not heard about me and my piano recital that I'm giving in my home? You're like a little kid.

115.628 - 120.614 Ben Mandelker

You're like, I literally write a newsletter every single week. I learned how to play Willie Nelson.

120.995 - 124.7 Amanda Vanderpool

What are you going to say about that? Send it to your voicemail.

124.92 - 146.88 Michael Rosenbaum

Auntie from hell. But I made chicken with olives. They love it. It's a great, it is a good newsletter. I subscribe to it as well. Also, I was on Sarah Gailey's podcast, Andy's Girls. We talked for two hours about Summer House Part 3 reunion and Jesse's timeline and all that good stuff. So if you need even more Summer House in your life, it's out today. So go check it out. Wow.

Chapter 2: How does Nathan feel about Joe being lead deckhand?

566.89 - 592.408 Michael Rosenbaum

Apparently Captain Sandy was on – watch what happens saying that Joe, you know, Joe's a womanizer and she doesn't like that. And that, um, like one of the most unreliable people, or I don't know, I don't know the exact question because I can't remember Instagram posts that well, but basically she does Jen like, uh, Jen's just Jen. Wow. Oh, wow. Yeah. And she doesn't like her.

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592.709 - 597.776 Michael Rosenbaum

So I guess Jen is going to get fired, and I'm already pissed off at Sandy for firing Jen. Come on. Yeah.

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598.376 - 626.519 Ben Mandelker

Yeah, I don't like that because Jen is the sort of asshole that I really, really enjoy. And I loved her passive-aggressive retribution for Kaylee taking charge of the tablescape, and the retribution happens right now. when Jen is like, oh, hey, Kelly, just remember, no shoving of the placemats anywhere. I've noticed it a few times now. I was like, wow, checking her placemat shoving frequency.

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626.66 - 643.922 Ben Mandelker

That's really like, and you know what? The thing is this, I was so happy for Jen in that moment because I know what it's like when someone pisses you off And you don't want to make a scene. So you just try to get a small victory somewhere and you just make that tiny little thing and you're like, got him to you.

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643.942 - 656.914 Ben Mandelker

It's like, Jen, you know, that's just like, it's like, oh, like she should be carried through like the streets of the city, like Katniss Everdeen with her fiery dress or something. She's like, I told her about the placemats.

657.354 - 677.558 Michael Rosenbaum

I won. Yes. And also she's getting revenge because she looks at Kaylee as being so bossy. She's like, who is she to boss me around? So she's like, oh, really? Well, the placemats are, they're being shoved somewhere and I don't like it. And Kayleigh's like, placemats? Placemats shoved where now? She's like, the lunch ones.

Chapter 3: What are the dynamics between Nathan and Joe in this episode?

679.821 - 686.67 Ben Mandelker

You can't even tell the difference between the two placemats? You make a tablescape and yet to you all the placemats are the same?

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686.97 - 689.614 Ronnie Karam

And then you shove them? I don't think so.

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689.594 - 701.07 Michael Rosenbaum

Well, wait, I put them neatly in the drawer under the... She goes, oh, really? Yeah, well, it's supposed to go in the cupboard underneath the naked lady. Neatly? I mean, can anything be neat when it's in the wrong place?

0

702.371 - 710.963 Ben Mandelker

I think it's pretty much like Yachting 101. Lunchtime placemats get put nicely under the naked lady in a cupboard. Everyone knows. Everyone knows.

0

711.003 - 718.83 Michael Rosenbaum

Also, could you be more specific? Because there is a half-naked lady... Doing pole dancing on an umbrella. I was waiting for that umbrella.

718.85 - 726.445 Amanda Vanderpool

She's like, oh, my God, pole dancing on an umbrella. And the other girls are like, yeah.

726.625 - 735.362 Michael Rosenbaum

I was like, please break. I just want that umbrella to break. Yeah. And possibly stab her in the thigh because this is crazy. Get off the umbrella.

735.983 - 743.816 Ben Mandelker

This is the first resilient umbrella in the history of umbrellas. Normally, umbrellas, like, if they have a chance to flop over or blow away or invert, they will take it.

743.877 - 753.793 Michael Rosenbaum

They should remake the, like, fucking platform with that umbrella because it is very, it's, like, unbreakable.

Chapter 4: How does the crew handle their tasks during the first charter?

856.316 - 858.519 Amanda Vanderpool

All right. I'm listening to you.

0

858.719 - 864.186 Ben Mandelker

It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Crappin's commercial.

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866.005 - 887.814 Michael Rosenbaum

Now, listen, Kaylee, at first I was worried because I was like, oh, no, Kaylee is going to be this too nice person who's trying to impress. Kaylee sees what Jen is doing, and Kaylee is going to win this war. She's like, oh, really? You think you're going to go try and make me look stupid and talk shit behind my back? I'm going to undermine you in the most effortless way you've ever seen.

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888.234 - 891.118 Michael Rosenbaum

So enjoy yourself, per se.

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891.942 - 897.652 Ben Mandelker

Yeah, she's perky, but she's not dumb. She's not dumb.

897.793 - 898.734

She gets her good.

899.155 - 909.394 Ben Mandelker

What'd you say to finish that? That's the most dangerous perky. Perky, but not dumb. Yeah, intelligent perky. It's a very scary combination. It's terrible.

909.374 - 938.115 Ben Mandelker

it's a very scary scary combination i'll tell you someone who is not that perky and maybe not that smart is cooper um cooper's on the bridge and what's so funny is cooper is from charleston and on love island there's a guy named caleb who's from charleston and i swear to god these are the same people i was like i'm waiting for it to be revealed that they're brothers or is this just the way guys in charleston look i'm like they look exactly the same to me did you see that they talk the same

939.057 - 956.399 Michael Rosenbaum

They're very similar. Yeah, they are very similar. On Love Island, that one, we were just talking about this before we recorded, but that one is telling the girl, he's like, yeah, you know, I'm from Charleston. I really, she goes, what do you like to do? And he's like, oh, I like line dancing. You know how to do that?

Chapter 5: What role does Aisha play in managing the guests?

1314.93 - 1322.538 Michael Rosenbaum

Okay. So Kat and Aisha are in the main salon, and everything's prepped. Everything's prepped. You're ready. You're ready, Aisha.

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1322.558 - 1331.147 Amanda Vanderpool

She's like, oh, my God. The way you did the fork is absolutely amazing. It's tear-inducing.

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1331.608 - 1335.572 Michael Rosenbaum

They cut some Aisha faces today. Some Aisha faces.

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1335.788 - 1365.762 Ben Mandelker

they had one where she was just like this for a solid five seconds on screen and i'm sorry for people who aren't on video but i have to do it for a bit i know just in i know i saw that moment what the hell oh my god and then so uh kaylee's asking asia let's head you go on slave she's like oh my god you guys love to play sportless that's beautiful

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1366.349 - 1373.727 Ben Mandelker

So they're going to be going to this island of Locrum. Locrum. Locrum. Loc-carum. Ronnie Carum.

1374.149 - 1380.484 Ronnie Karam

And it's, uh... It's perfect because it's a lot of flat rocks. Right next to the air, we can go cliff jumping.

1381.006 - 1390.206 Ben Mandelker

God... Nothing says Vaughn like Cliff jumping into an area that's next to a bunch of flat rocks. I'm like, give me those head injuries. I am ready for them.

1390.967 - 1413.273 Michael Rosenbaum

I think these guests have enough, honestly. They're still swinging from umbrellas. They do not need more head injuries, okay? Meanwhile, we've got Joy and Luke flirting. She's not really flirting. He's really flirting because he's a very giant man who needs a lot of protein and he is going to flirt with you. And I'm not saying that Joy isn't worth the flirting.

1413.453 - 1421.128 Michael Rosenbaum

I'm just saying beware any muscular man flirting with the chef because all he wants is protein. You know, the man will use you for protein.

Chapter 6: What are the guests' expectations for their beach picnic?

1492.858 - 1496.627 Michael Rosenbaum

You're a bagel aficionado. There's no – every place has a different –

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1496.607 - 1516.59 Ben Mandelker

bagel every brand has it's not a consistent it's not like just buying white bread you know where it's all very similar bagels or there's tents there's a lot of factors and there's like multiple rises and there's like a boiling and then there's a there's a baking and then you got to add like the is it the barley syrup or something to it like there's like a whole bunch of

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1518.106 - 1532.436 Michael Rosenbaum

crap is on that's just so much Ronnie reacting to the barley syrup it's just so much you know it's one of those things like it's a dollar you know what I mean like yeah I will give you the dollar to die I'm gonna do it once

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1532.551 - 1542.001 Ben Mandelker

I'm going to do it once. But like you really – I think like if I were to do it, I think I would have to like wake up at 6 in the morning in order to have my bagel ready at 10 a.m. I think it's like a three to four-hour process.

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1542.422 - 1545.786 Michael Rosenbaum

Isn't it even longer? Don't they have to like sit and stuff or rest?

1546.046 - 1562.75 Ben Mandelker

There's an initial rise and then you have to like – I think you have to like make them into the shape. And then there's like another rise. And then you do something. There may even be another mini rise. And then you do the boil and then you do the baking.

1563.372 - 1581.828 Michael Rosenbaum

That's a lot. That's just so much. I know. Like how do people even invent bread? It takes so many steps. Like how did you figure out all the rises? Was it just a lazy person who's like, oh, I've made the dough. Oh, I'm tired. They just leave it there. Yeah. It's bigger now. All right. I'll mush it. I don't want to do it. I don't want to do it.

1582.269 - 1590.989 Michael Rosenbaum

And then they mush it a little more and they're like, I can't finish this. And then finally someone's like, just fucking bake it. And I'm like, this is perfect. Well, I gave up five times.

1592.031 - 1610.044 Ben Mandelker

I guarantee all the food that we enjoy. It was an accident. There was a Carol Burnett sketch, um, uh years ago i remember seeing it as a kid where she's like a cave woman and her caveman husband comes home and she's like here try this she's like what is this she's like it's milk he's like oh this is delicious how'd you make it she's like well i

Chapter 7: How does Joy's cooking impact the crew's morale?

2024.444 - 2043.868 Michael Rosenbaum

Luke is very professional. She's like, Luke? Yeah, he's very attentive. Wait, come on now. Why not Joe? Why not Joe? Come on. He's like, why not Joe? Well, I feel like the past seasons, Joe's been great. Okay, he's helped me out. But there's certain times I feel like I can't trust him enough. I trust Luke more than I can trust Joe.

0

2044.188 - 2062.955 Michael Rosenbaum

Now, this is where he should have just been like, I can't trust that little fucker. Yeah, exactly. He's undermining me. And he's trying to make me look stupid. And he doesn't like me because I stood up against him acting like crap to that girl all season who he treated like total dog shit. And he's not a good person. I don't want him under me. You deal with it.

0

2063.015 - 2067.14 Michael Rosenbaum

Replace him and I'll put your replacement up as lead deckhand or whatever.

0

2067.781 - 2073.128 Ben Mandelker

No, and what he really should have said on top of that was, I can't trust him. And on top of that,

0

2074.188 - 2097.715 Ben Mandelker

luke has a willingness to learn and i really feel like i not only can i mold him you can mold him and he's just a sponge and yes he's a little rough around the edges but by the end of the season i know he is going to be an inspiration to everyone and like oh yeah oh god he can learn oh my god just put him in the tender let him crash it five times i don't care it's a learning experience

2097.695 - 2109.109 Michael Rosenbaum

He's got a T-shirt, a T-shirt that says hugs, not drugs. Oh, my God. Just climaxed. Okay. Put him in charge. Put him in charge of the whole boat.

2109.129 - 2128.731 Ben Mandelker

That's what he needed to do. And he's like, listen, I'm having a hard time with this decision. I mean, why did they move wind from 8 p.m. to 9 p.m.? Okay, some of us have to wake up early in the morning. Oh, and your decision too. I don't like that either. I'm struggling with it. Is it cool to wait for the second charter? Why don't you wait? Okay, just maybe think on it.

2129.251 - 2145.971 Michael Rosenbaum

Yeah, she's like, Joel has more experience than Luke, and Nathan's worked with Joel before. Nathan needs to pause and think about the decision before he makes it. Okay, well, yes, Joel has a skill set, but he's going to try and undermine me. Does he have my best interest at heart? Is he going to fuck every girl on the boat and ruin crew morale?

2146.452 - 2156.404 Michael Rosenbaum

Okay, you don't care that he fucks every girl on the boat. So stop bringing that into it, and that's not business. I mean, in any other job, yes, it could be business, but this is below deck.

Chapter 8: What humorous incidents occur during the picnic setup?

2805.3 - 2811.51 Michael Rosenbaum

Have you ever heard of the X shows? I mean, I've seen shows that are like, X, XX, adult show, but...

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2812.013 - 2840.113 Ben Mandelker

that's kind of literally never right yeah literally never but i also tune out all the the the for straight guys except for the sports stuff but like the but like the the scantily clad women showgirls stuff for the for the straight guys it's like it does not even like it's it's it just goes right it just yeah i see those billboards and i'm like oh my god i wonder if those girls want to go to lunch with me they look so by the way

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2840.583 - 2854.951 Ben Mandelker

Was there, you know, that the Vanderpump Hotel opened this weekend? Of course I do. A lot of our colleagues were invited to it. It looked like a fun old time, right? Has there been any gossip that's come out of that that you've heard of?

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2854.971 - 2859.199 Michael Rosenbaum

No, I didn't know that people were invited and we weren't. Why are you trying to ruin my day?

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2860.023 - 2871.341 Ben Mandelker

I mean, why should we be invited to it? It's not like we've been supporting Vanderpump Rules since the very beginning, including this season that everyone hated, but we liked. It's okay. Don't invite us.

2872.263 - 2875.668 Michael Rosenbaum

Yeah, whatever, Dierks. But I will go stay there.

2875.909 - 2898.467 Ben Mandelker

It used to be the Cromwell. Now it's the Crumbetta. but um yeah okay well if there's any good stories someone tell us so now we're back can you tell how much we're like trying to talk about anything but this show right now so and it's a good show too so i don't know why because it's pretty good season so far so uh they're talking about the decoration of the cake and um

2898.447 - 2913.521 Michael Rosenbaum

Joy is asking if she can have Kaylee decorate the cake because Kaylee is, of course, also good at doing cakes, which is great. But, oh, my God, Jen is going to lose her fucking mind. Oh, you do cakes, too?

2913.542 - 2915.967

Oh, don't think I don't see what you're doing.

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