God loads up Google Maps and directs the Israelites towards Canaan via the Red Sea, which he divides in two with the mother of all sneezes. Pharaoh pops back up for one final scare before disappearing beneath the waves, along with his 600 pimped-out chariots. Although the Israelites couldn’t pack any desert hiking essentials, they did remember the tambourines for a big dance number. When the food and water run out, the Hebrew Complaint Brigade insists on talking to Moses’s manager. God temporarily solves the problem by carving some life straws out of a tree, throwing dinner rolls at people, and attempting to cook quail. We wrap up the episode with an epic but stinky battle with the Amalekites. (Exodus 13:17-17:16)

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“What did the council decide on item 42?” — answered with the speaker and the moment.

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