How Couples Can Navigate Pandemic Money Troubles

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WSJ Your Money Briefing 7 min 3 speakers 7 chapters transcribed 2 months ago
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How has the pandemic increased financial tension between partners?

J.R. Whalen 0:05
Here's your Money Briefing for Tuesday, November 24th. I'm J.R. Whalen for The Wall Street Journal. The pandemic has put financial stress on many households, and that's raising the level of tension among spouses and partners.
Veronica Dagher 0:17
It's really tough, especially if people are losing their jobs or have a pay cut that they're dealing with. Also, some people may be spending more because they're bored, they're sitting at home, and they may be justifying their spending more on things like clothing and home-related items.
J.R. Whalen 0:34
Coming up, our personal finance reporter Veronica Dagger will be here to discuss what financial planners say about how to manage a household budget. Plus, we'll hear from a therapist and confidence coach with tips for having difficult conversations about money. That's after the break.
J.R. Whalen 0:55
The economic downturn is prompting many couples to rethink their household budgets. And for many of them, that's touching off new arguments about money and amplifying existing ones. Our personal finance reporter, Veronica Dagger, has been checking in with financial advisors to see what they suggest. And she's here to discuss it. Veronica, thanks for being here.
Veronica Dagher 1:13
Thanks for having me, JR.

What specific money disputes are couples having during COVID-19?

J.R. Whalen 1:15
So financial planners often hear from their clients about disagreements in a family, you know, how to spend money on maybe schooling or things to do in their leisure time. But how are things different this year?
Veronica Dagher 1:26
People are fighting about how much to save in an emergency fund, how much to spend on a new house, when to move to the new house. These are some discussions that have really intensified and changed because of the pandemic. The down economy has hurt a lot of couples, and we're seeing some sort of splits between husband and wives or different spouses because of the very different financial situations some families are in. One couple I spoke to, the husband felt very secure in his job, but the wife does not. And ironically, she works in health care. So in the past, she felt very secure in her position. This economy, though, is splitting couples and splitting different sectors into very different situations.
Veronica Dagher 2:11
So essentially, he wanted to invest more in the stock market. She wanted to save more in the couple's rainy day fund. Long story short, they went to a financial planner. He ran the numbers and he found out that, hey, you know, they had six months of emergency funds at the ready at their current situation. So realizing that was the case that made her feel more secure. And the couple decided to invest any other additional money into the stock market after all.

How can a financial planner help couples resolve budget disagreements?

Veronica Dagher 2:41
But seeing the numbers, seeing that financial plan is really crucial because that can help you make a decision. If you're just guessing or sort of trying to guesstimate what you have, that's probably going to lead to more conflict.
J.R. Whalen 2:54
Okay. So what other kinds of financial conversations are couples having during the pandemic?
Veronica Dagher 2:59
We've also heard debates from couples about how much to spend on housing and when to move. And one of the things we've heard from financial planners is just be careful about making a fast decision. You don't want to move just because of a temporary situation such as the pandemic. So if you're having debates about whether or not the family home is too small, or if you want to move to a new neighborhood or take on most likely a larger mortgage, you really want to make time first to consider if you can afford to take on higher housing costs in the event a spouse loses a job. Financial planners also say consider how the commute will change for both partners if you're eventually required to be back in the office.
Veronica Dagher 3:42
Other considerations include property taxes and utilities and the upkeep of the home. You want to have a conversation about all of these things before you make the move because you want to minimize those fights later on.
J.R. Whalen 3:55
fights and disagreements often stem from a lack of communication. You know, money can be a tricky subject to bring up with a partner, but there are ways to stir up the courage to have important talks about money.

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