204 | When Mentors Become Stand-Ins for Your Parents
episode
Your Money, Your Rules | Financial Mastery, Wealth Mindset, Leadership Principles, Intuitive Decision-Making, Human Design
13 min
1 speaker
2 chapters
transcribed 1 month ago
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Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.
What realization sparked the insight that mentors can become parental stand‑ins?
Welcome back to Your Money, Your Rules. Today I want to discuss an awareness that I discovered over this past weekend that I recognize in myself and what I was actually doing for so many years. I see this in my clients as well. And it's this idea that We have made our mentors become stand-ins for our parents and their validation. So let's dive in. Pretty much every area of my life besides money and business, I don't really listen to authority figures. I'm very anchored in and trusting myself and I move from certainty from that place. But with money and business, that has been something that's been a little bit more tender for me, probably obviously because of, you know, if you've listened to previous podcasts of my wounding around money, around business, I would even say money trauma, even business trauma.
So there's that like little bit of like tinge or sensitiveness that I have around money in business. And for me, that has been something that has been such a such a sensitive topic for me that I have sought plenty of advice, plenty of advisors, mentors, coaches, consultants, books, courses, you name it. I've done it. And I think that That's probably because it has been a sensitive topic for me and because I have desired it and I have wanted that more probably than I have wanted some other things in my life. And so of course I'm gonna put the attention on it. Probably over, you know, not that I haven't valued my health because I've always taken care of myself, but It has been something that for me has been more natural for me.
Parenting has been more natural than maybe, you know, the money and the business side. Not that I'm not good at it, but definitely I should say the attention is is more fixated on money and business. It has been in my life than parenting or my health and things of that sort. So naturally, because I've had this desire and the want for it, right? The want for More money, the want for business and all of that kind of stuff was stronger. I've hired people in that realm, like I mentioned. And what I recognize is that I had and used to, I don't do this anymore. I have outsourced my decision making to them. You know, I held their beliefs or ideas higher than I held my own. I literally put them out on a pedestal.
You know, I have friends that Put medical professionals on a pedestal and they view them as the authority figure. So we all do this in different ways. And I think what I have noticed for myself and for clients is that tenderness around money and business, we do this in the business realm and then the money realm. And so and what I recognized is it was like this unconscious belief, unconscious thread, uh, that I was seeking permission from my father. I love my dad. He's amazing. I respect him. He, you know, gave me an opportunity he and my uncle gave me an opportunity to walk into a I think it was like a 30-year-old business at the time. to have, I mean, it w didn't take long to have complete access and to be managing all of the money, to be really running a lot of the company and to be on that more advisory role.
So I'm so grateful for that because there's so much that I learned by sitting in the seat and doing the things that I did in the business. And also what I recognize is that I at the time I would value his opinion over my own. And I don't know when it happened, you know, somewhere along the way, I learned that what I thought about myself, my what I trusted for myself mattered less than what either he thought about me or my uncle thought about me or what I was capable of. And when I reflect on this, you know, I noticed that growing up, you know, there's patterns, right? Growing up early on, like maybe because we, me and my dad, hung out more than me and my mom did. He was more of a level-headed presence, you know, at the time.
And then when we began to work together, there was that whole dynamic too. And I remember so often there being, and I didn't have the language for it at the time, but I would have. these ideas, I would have these downloads, these intuitive hits that I would tell him to act on.
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Chapters
2 chaptersSpeakers
1 identifiedMore from Your Money, Your Rules | Financial Mastery, Wealth Mindset, Leadership Principles, Intuitive Decision-Making, Human Design
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